Five, and the effects of Reginald Hargreeves’ parenting
So like, I see a lot of posts around talking about the effects Hargreeves had on all the kids, the abuse they went through, and who they turned out to be, but a lot of the time when they get to Five this gets somewhat overshadowed by his experiences in the apocalypse, since that’s what he’s shown to have PTSD over, and is generally on the forefront of Five’s mind
But the effects of Five’s childhood are hugely evident in his character for me (potentially bc I’ve been through similar, just to a lesser extent), so I wanna go into them more
Here’s the thing - kids can’t help but want approval from their parents, even kids like Five. He can mask it in whatever he likes, but as a kid, Five was hugely dependent on Hargreeves’ approval. It’s more insidious than with most children, too, because when Reginald Hargreeves is involved, gaining his approval means avoiding his wrath - something you definitely don’t want to face.
You see this all the time in kids with parents who have too high standards, even if the parents are considerably more gentle than Sir Reginald - the kids who can achieve to that standard become obsessed with it, turn it into their whole identity, while the kids who can’t stop trying at all. And this harms both, because the underachievers feel like they’ll never amount to anything, and the overachievers become paranoid, knowing they’re one bad day away from becoming like the underachievers - the people they’ve been taught their whole life are the worst possible thing to be - so they try even harder to make sure that never happens.
The overachievers in the Hargreeves family are Luther, Diego, and Five, the underachievers are Klaus and Vanya (Allison and Ben it’s hard to tell, maybe they managed to avoid this or maybe it just manifests in different ways), and this constantly affects all of their relationships with each other.
Reginald actively encouraged this discrepancy as well, because it made it easier to control them. The underachievers don’t try anything because they believe they have no power. The overachievers won’t try anything because one word of disapproval from Reginald and they lose that status, and with it their entire sense of identity and self worth. They can’t band together either, because the underachievers think they amount to nothing, the underachievers don’t trust the overachievers because they maintain the same standards, the overachievers don’t trust each other because they’re all competing for the same status, and the overachievers don’t listen to the underachievers because they believe the lie that the underachievers can’t do anything. It’s a terrifyingly effective strategy.
There’s yet another layer with the Hargreeves kids, though, and that’s their numbers. This was another deliberate move on the part of Sir Reginald, because a hierarchy only adds to this dynamic.
Number one was superior to number two, who was superior to number three, and so on. It’s not a coincidence that the overachievers tend to be higher up on the scale, and the underachievers lower. It’s easier to excel when you believe you can do it, harder when you think you can’t. And the further down the hierarchy you are, the more you’re held to the standard of the ones above you.
So now we get to Five in particular, because Five is a special case - an overachiever very low on the hierarchy. He was constantly held to the standard of numbers 1-4, but Five could actually outperform them. And this was encouraged by their father - Reginald would have realised early on that telling Five he wasn’t capable wouldn’t have worked, because Five had proof he was, it would have only made him more rebellious (see: the reason he ran off in the first place).
So instead he creates an air of superiority in Five that’s highly conditional and dependent on him. Five isn’t like his siblings. Five can do better. Five gets praise. Which doesn’t seem harmful until you realise, Five has to do better. Five doesn’t have the option of an off day. Five has built his entire identity around being the best, because as a young child that was the only way he got anything close to the love and attention he needed, and as soon as he fails to outperform his siblings, he’s going to lose that forever.
(It also probably contributed to a lot of that cocky attitude - if he ever did have a moment of weakness, he couldn’t let anyone see, or it would discredit him, so he covers it up with the whole devil may care thing)
It’s pretty obvious in Five’s reactions to things that the siblings he got along with best were Ben and Vanya - 6 and 7. I don’t think it was a conscious decision to be closer to the two lower on the hierarchy than him, but I also don’t think it’s a coincidence either - after all, he’s never going to be held to their standard like he is the other four. With anyone above him in the ranking, there would have been a tension in their relationship, the knowledge that they were being compared, and Five would have to be constantly on guard for that. Around Ben and Vanya, he can actually breathe, and that makes it a lot easier for him to appreciate the qualities they have as people.
There’s two moments in this season where Five’s siblings genuinely get under his skin, and force him from exasperated to defensive, and both of them are hugely telling of this. The first is when Luther tells him “You think you’re better than us, you always have. But the truth is, you’re just as messed up as the rest of us.”
Luther’s completely right, but there’s two things here Five can’t handle hearing. Even after 45 years alone in the apocalypse, this is a core part of his identity he can’t shake. One is “you think you’re better than us”, the implication that that’s not true. The other is “you’re just as messed up as the rest of us”, making Five confront the realisation that he has flaws. Five responds “I don’t think I’m better than you, Number One. I know I am.”
He even refers to Luther by number, the only time in the series he ever does this to anyone. It’s a deliberate jab, a way to remind Luther than even though he was supposedly number one, Five still managed to outperform him. It’s honestly a really childish move, because it’s Five frantically scrambling to get back on a pedestal he’s been on his whole life - and not a very stable one either, if one comment from Luther can bring it down. Five believes he’s perfect, infallible, because he can’t live with himself if he’s not.
The second time comes from the same root but the other direction - his conversation with Klaus in episode 9. Klaus calls him an apocalypse addict, comparing the two of them, and Five internally freaks the fuck out, because of all the siblings he can’t handle being similar to, Klaus is the top of that list. If Luther was the golden boy Five constantly had to compete against, Klaus is the dumpster fire that serves to remind Five this is what he can never become.
Klaus, of course, is just a person, and has many good qualities, but Five was never trained to see them. Five was trained to see Klaus as a failure, a disappointment, someone it was better to be dead than to be like. (He may be nearly double the age of the rest of his siblings, but alone in the apocalypse isn’t an ideal ground for reexamining your relationships with people, and Five still has so much growing up to do.)
Of all of them, Five is the most willing to push boundaries with his powers, to explore new realms of what he can and can’t do, and that’s also an effect of this - where the others were a lot more controlled or restricted, Five was encouraged to adapt, to be more powerful, to take risks, and Hargreeves probably allowed him more leeway than the others (again, fuelling that sense of superiority), as long as it provided results (and there’s the paranoia part, the risks Five took needed to pay off, he didn’t have any other option)
Credit to Five though, because the time travel scene was all him. Reginald’s influence should have been enough to keep him from running off like that, but Five had a strong enough will to ignore it.
I think this is the mistake the Handler made as well. The Temps Commission employs people easy to manipulate, and a childhood of abuse followed by a lifetime of solitude sounds like the perfect breeding ground for such a person. If she just wanted Five she could have retrieved him at any age, after all, but she waits 45 years. His skills weren’t increasing that much in that time, not more than they would have been working for the Commission. It was just that the longer he was alone, the easier he was to control.
But neither Hargreeves nor the Handler really anticipated just how stubborn and steadfast Five can be. He’s affected by his childhood, yes, it forms the core of who he is as a person, but he’s smart, and he found a way around it - picking a goal and sticking to it no matter what. Klaus was right, in a way, about him being an addict of the apocalypse, Five gets dangerous tunnel vision with a task in mind. He literally admits to Hazel that not once (in 45 years, with precious few distractions) did he think about what he would do after he stopped the apocalypse, focused only on doing it. He doesn’t let anything else through, and that can be a detriment sometimes (not telling his siblings about the shrapnel wound and nearly dying because they were close to his goal), but when someone’s trying to manipulate you, it’s a huge advantage. (It’s also a huge advantage when trying to survive in the apocalypse, you don’t stop, you don’t doubt yourself, you don’t question what you are and aren’t willing to do, you just do it and move on)
He broke through Hargreeves’ control by focusing on learning to time travel, and he’s unaffected by the Handler’s attempts to do the same with his one goal of getting back and saving his family. She doesn’t understand it either, because all she sees are his other traits - his pragmatism, his intelligence, his dissatisfaction with his own body image, and thinks if she can make him look how he wants to look (“we’re all looking for happy”), that’ll be enough to let his natural affinity for Commission work take over. She vastly underestimates his dedication.
(And also just his love for his siblings, like, I’m framing this potentially too much as a “he does this so he can’t be manipulated” decision, and there is some truth to that, but if that were solely the case he’d only be focused on stopping the apocalypse. No, Five cares so much about his siblings that he’s willing to compromise with them on nearly everything, even though stubbornness is kind of his thing, and even though he’s been trained to believe they’re lesser than him. He seriously debates letting the apocalypse happen if it’ll save them. The reason they get under his skin (when other people underestimating him don’t nearly as much), is because some part of him genuinely values their opinion. Five says he’s not looking for happy, but I don’t think that’s true - it’s just that happy for him isn’t made of personal gain, but rather finding a place in his family he doesn’t have to fight for)
