I may not be a perfect person but at least I have never yelled at an employee in a store

Discoholic đȘ©

No title available
trying on a metaphor

oozey mess

#extradirty
Claire Keane

@theartofmadeline
Peter Solarz
DEAR READER

Product Placement
Jules of Nature
No title available

Love Begins

romaâ
No title available
Game of Thrones Daily
Monterey Bay Aquarium

izzy's playlists!
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
i don't do bad sauce passes

seen from France
seen from Israel

seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from Russia

seen from Spain
seen from China
seen from Spain

seen from Canada

seen from United States
seen from Spain
seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Belgium

seen from Denmark
@senojamme
I may not be a perfect person but at least I have never yelled at an employee in a store
anyone else yâall got those clicky ankles
Have you considered that you might be a reindeer?
did you just fucking know this
i dropped my apple in the toilet
did you decide oh im going to the bathroom better bring an apple with me
basically yes
why is there a catÂ
he was helping
Rhino so happy to see his caretaker he gets the zoomiesÂ
(Source)
my dog: this water no good,,,, it is too gross. it has bin here in this here water bowl too long for an hourâŠ. that⊠is to long for it to be drankenâŠ
also my dog: this poddle⊠in the road. it isâŠâŠ.. so⊠refreshingâŠâŠ.
love how kids introduce themselves like âhello im johnny im five years old i know how to readâ yeah cool i didnt ask for your life story asshole
me: hi! how are you today :)
customer:
This isnât even an exaggeration
Thisđđđ
My wife and I were were talking the other day and, I donât remember what we were even talking about, but the idea came up that we would need an oreo for. I joked about getting one from my secret stash. This is where she made her mistake. She said âoh right, like you could have an Oreo stash without me knowing about it.â
Iâm sorry?
Thatâs a challenge.
Oreos aquired.
Iâm going to hide them in a super simple place at first
But be sure to follow this post while I chronicle all the ways and places I hide them and also how I plan on taunting her with cookies while she canât find the package
She is out of the house for a moment so itâs time to enjoy a few cookies
And find a new hiding spot
Hehehe
They up there
Normally Iâm a Oreos with milk kinda guy, but Iâll take coffee if coffee is available
Now to hide them right under her nose
She never looks under the TV for anything. Tonight when we are watching Halloween Wars Iâll have a big dopey grin on my face
Time to up the stakes. It was fun having em here and hiding them around her while she didnât know what was happening. Bit now itâs time for her to be in on the game she is playing
Four cookies packed in her lunch. Game on
Iâve been cleaning house today and feeling like Iâve done a pretty good job. Time to reward myself with some delicious Oreos
Aaaaand put them where she would never find them in a million years
:)
Got up early this morning and helped pack everyoneâs lunch. Pulling a damn Oprah over here
You get some cookies! You get some cookies! Everyone gets cookies!
Then a devious idea struck meâŠ
I put the remaining Oreos in a baggie to hide by themselves. Now to âhideâ the package where it will probably be foundâŠ
And pin the actual stash to the inside of the closet wall
If you two werenât already married Iâd beg you to marry her because you two are obviously perfect for each other and I love this post with all my heart
This guyâs dopey grin at his success at hiding oreos is exactly what Iâm here for
You like that eh? Well you are going to love todayâs installment
Look at that. So sad. So few Oreos left
Guess Iâll just pin em right to the middle of the wall in the middle of the living room. Sheâll never find em there
Oh, guess I should put this back up
Bwa ha ha ha! You guys! You guys donât understand! I was planning on doing this and when I got home and looked at it I was like âaww, itâs too thin. They wonât fit.â I even TOLD my wife this and how I was disappointed that I wouldnât be able to hide them back there.
But then I looked again. They dooooo
Thank you all so much for the love. I knew y'all would like this, but I had no idea you would like it THIS MUCH. People calling us âgoalsâ and stuff⊠ManâŠ. Itâs kinda hard to take in ya know? Anyways: if this post gets Over 9000âą before I get off work today I will pick up Halloween Oreos on my way home and this will not stop
And, as promised, a dopey grin
Twasnt easy to get the stupid video to load. But I got it and I recommend giving it a watch here: http://keepcalmandcarrieunderwood.tumblr.com/post/179330357103
She is so happy that the Oreo Saga continues. Just look at how happy she is
Came home to find this
But she never looked inside the blue chair
Good stuff, but itâs time for some cookies
Gotta have some while I think about where these guys are going next
Hmmmmm
Got it.
Ohmygosh oh. my. gosh. You guys. Near disaster. Check this shiz out:
Wife and I were sewing Ellyâs Halloween costume up
Yea, she is going to be a spider and itâs super cute and all but. But. Loooook
Holy actual shit the Oreos fell out from the table literally next to her.
The moment she got up I threw them into the closet
Also:shout out to whoever it was that lost a follower for this post
Sry bout that eh.
This is glorious and Iâm so damn happy this is still going.
My god I need to see where else they are hidden. You are a genius sir
My God this is amazing
Best post ever
lets not forget this gem
cant believe weâre leaving out this
and more importantly this
interesting how you forgotÂ
and
ok but
and
hmmm and perhaps
and these ones too
Iâm not sure how you managed to forget this gem:
excuse me but:
where would we be withour kermit
canât believe y'all forgot
*pronounces âhors dâoeuvresâ as âhorse divorceâ*