For any concerns you may have

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Full disclosure: I am cis, so I do not have a horse in this race. But I did see a post that I wish I could find and share on the topic of cisswap from a transgender perspective. It was a thing the person posting had done in the past as a safe way of exploring gender identies, before they identified as transgendered. They said it was wrong to ban people from that exploration of gender and identity, since it was something that ultimately helped them, and may help others, find their own identity.

If you do find that please send it along to me and I will reblog it.

As I said I feel that sharing people’s opinion is quite important, and listening to trans individuals on their opinions of this is something I feel strongly about.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

just wanted to say, i have many many trans friends and i've asked them their opinion on cisswaps and all that, some despise them, some don't mind, but none that i've asked are FOR it, the ones that don't mind are of the mind that it's a step in the right direction even if it's not the preferred step

I actually ran a small poll for this debate over here in order to see what people’s opinions are on this subject. (And before anyone is irritated about me making it so that cis was a category people could vote under it was for more accurate data results, and because some of the arguments I have seen being made was that only cis individuals were pro-cisswapping as a thing. If people feel strongly they will vote, even if there is not a category they can vote under, and that would skew the results.)

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

I've got a question regarding the transgender post, it's a minor question I suppose, but why is it wrong to identify your muse's gender as male or female? 😣

Honestly I am not entirely sure myself. I myself am not trans and am not fully aware of all the complexities that come with gender identity. (I’m gendervague myself, basically I don’t fully identify as cis, but it’s too nebulous to describe thanks to neurodivergence things. Best guess is that I’m somewhere on the non-binary spectrum, but it’s too exhausting to figure it out.)

Given that I myself don’t have a big link to my gender identity and don’t exactly identify strongly with much of anything gender wise I’m really not an expert on that sort of stuff, but I have trans mutuals and know trans individuals for whom the terminology really matters.

Best guess is that it sounds more biological and those terms are used in arguments invalidating trans individuals, but again I don’t know. I just run a meme blog, and know that many trans individuals take issue with those terms and it makes them uncomfortable.

-mod human

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

I'm Jewish and I just wanted to weigh in and say I think it's perfectly fine to reblog Hanukkah memes whether you're Jewish or not! As long as you're respectful, there's no harm in it. I reblog Christmas memes all the time and I'm not Christian.

Thank you very much for your input anon, and that was how I felt as well. Respect is good, sharing cultures in a respectful manner is good, as is learning about other people’s religions, be it through ooc conversations or during Rp threads. It helps make the world a better and more understanding place.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Hi there, this is in regards to f/f ships. It's been all over my dash all day and it makes me feel so warm as a trans-lesbian. I see these posts just booming in notes and it's so fascinating to see how many rpers in the community are for f/f ships. It's even inspiring me to make more lesbian characters. Sadly, I haven't seen anyone in my fandom talk about the dilemma... but it's still nice knowing there're more people supporting f/f ships out there than I thought.

I’m glad it’s making you feel warm, and yeah there are a lot of us, even if we’re hard to find sometimes. I’ve sort of created myself a little nest in an area surrounded by rpers who’ve got wlw muses and it makes me very happy.

My ladies may only have a handful of ships in total, but they’re all lovely, and I wish everyone else all the luck with their f/f ships. Remember you’re not alone, there are definitely more of us out there with lesbian muses than you’d think.

Also, to the anon who sent this, feel free to send me an IM if you do make some more lesbian characters, I’d be happy to share with you some of my favourite blogs with sapphic muses, see about bringing you in to the nice supportive little group I’ve found.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Listen, unless you know the mun personally behind their muse, unless you know without a shadow of a doubt that they're a terrible, evil person, you cannot judge someone based on what they write about in fiction. My therapist said it's healthy for people to explore dark things in fiction. It might not work for some people, but it does for others, and I'm sick of people assuming I'm evil just because I've written dark muses.

I’m not assuming you’re evil, and I’m well aware of the fact that people write dark things and are not horrible people. 

The reason I added the note that I did not wish to have a discussion about how mun=/=muse was that when I made the post initially I had a great deal of messages from people explaining to me that that was how things were.

I personally write muses who have done a great deal of terrible things, murder, torture, psychological manipulation, arsons on a scale large enough it could be considered terrorism, and I even have one who could definitely be considered a serial killer. I know full well that it is okay to write such things, and to explore them.

THAT BEING SAID this blog is not going to be making or reblogging memes specifically for characters that are nazis/slavers/paedophiles etc, and before anyone says anything I have had people ask about starters for at least one of those topics in the past (x)

You can write what you want, create characters that are extremely horrible people who do all number of things, and I will not judge you for it. But at the same time I will not be writing or reblogging memes for those sorts of characters with those sorts of implications.

If someone wants a collection of sentence starters from specific films, including quotes that are extremely threatening in nature, or memes involving abduction or things of that sort then I have no problem with it and those sorts of things can be requested and may be created/reblogged (though extensively tagged and all that for people’s comfort.)

On the other hand if someone wants a meme for things related to planning widespread acts of terror, enslaving a population of some sort, or committing racial genocide then those will not be created here, and if they are seen will not be reblogged.

[confessionsofa-roleplayer]

so, here’s the thing. way back when i started this blog some four years ago, i used to shoutouts on the blog. however, i had gotten rid of that due to the fact i wanted to move to a different idea i had for the blog. see, what the blog is now is what i always sort of envisioned, a place where people could speak freely and get their issues off of their chest. when i originally did shoutouts, it seemed that was all that was flowing into the inbox so i quickly axed the idea. however, i feel we’re at a point where we could maybe bring shoutouts back to the blog while keeping the venting and issues people send, well, flowing.

i felt it would be ideal for me to ask our audience what they think, see if they would like to see such a thing on their dash from our blog, or if they feel it would ruin the idea the blog presents.

so, i would like to get the opinion of our audience and their votes before we decide to move forward. if we decide to move forward with allowing this, shoutouts will be queued just the same as confessions that get sent in.

thank you for listening and thank you for you input.

mod liv

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Personally I find that confession blogs that also do shout outs seem to have the confessions sort of drowned out by the shout out stuff and they sort of seem to lose their appeal in a pretty big way. We’ve got blogs out there for positivity, like @positivity-for-the-rpers which I run (so I know it’s still active, a lot of them have died out over the years and I no longer know which still exist), as well as fandom-specific ones.

You already sort of have positivity too, like I’ve seen confessions that are about how much people love Rpers doing things and other positive things like that.

Those are a nice break from the confessions, while still fitting with the blog’s anonymous nature.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

I also had a look at the notes of that poll post and there's a reply in there that reflects my own opinion a lot more eloquently than I could manage. Perhaps in a more absolute way, but in terms of 'traditional' genderbending (i.e. what most people would consider as rule 63 for 90% of the time) it's pretty spot on. It's essentially... if the way you genderbend is coded to imply that the body alterations change the gender, it'll always come with a whiff of transphobia.

I have seen that reply, and I understand the attitudes completely. It’s very well written indeed.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Okay. The opinion I feel like isn't being represented is how often it's just an excuse to change up genitalia and sex characteristics and nothing else. You're not bending their gender if your character is, internally and personality wise, indistinguishable. If the way you make a character a "different gender" is slapping boobs on a cis man or a penis on a cis woman then I fail to see how that's not transphobic. It reduces gender to parts. [1]

The most common genderbending I see (which it not just rpc stuff) is literally aesthetics. And as some who gets my “real gender” equated to what my body is like (I’m a trans guy) by others, it feels like the same thing when people do that. I can’t help but be upset when there’s no critical thought - when no one considers making a character trans, or changing even one hobby to distinguish one character from another, or not considering nb identities at all [2]  Really what I’d like to see is people, particularly cis people, be more critical about how and why they are gbing. In the world we live in we all absorb transphobic narratives of parts = gender and even if we don’t believe that it can still play into our decisions. Most people absolve themselves of any wrong doing without being critical of the trope and discussing and considering how it can be utilised in non-problematic ways, and that is what I think is transphobic.  [3/3]          

[pollingtherpc]

Polling the RPC: is genderbending inherently transphobic?

[pollingtherpc]

pollingtherpc:

Cast your vote here

Reblog to share poll for others to answer.

Results as of the fourth of march 2018

Results as of the tenth of March 2018

[pollingtherpc]

Also if anyone is wondering why I included a cis option it is because if a cis person wished to put in their opinion there is nothing stopping them from doing so, and by providing them with their own category for voting they can vote there and accurate data can be collected.

This is to (hopefully) avoid having people putting their vote in under a different category simply because their identity is not there, as is the generic non-cis identifier.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Seeing the gender bending situation popping up again.. did you ever address the people who do believe it is often (not 100% but most of the time) done in a transphobic way? You did a survey and Im sure I put in my 2 cents but all I've seen is people saying "im cis but i think it's fine" and a few "im ACTUALLY trans and-" type asks. As a transguy, I've got a fair amount to say that I feel has been missed. If you're planning on collating responses fair but otherwise i might send them in separately

If you have a response feel free to submit it and I will post it.

I merely wished to collect the data on it via the survey, to see what the statistics were.

It is a very sensitive topic with people falling on both sides, but a lot seem divided as to if it is always transphobic or not, and I just wanted to get a survey in there to see where everything lines up.

Mostly because I’d seen a few posts from either side claiming that everyone on the other side was x or that lots of y agree with them, figured it would be good to have the data actually there so people can reference it and develop their own views on the subject.

If you want to submit the thing feel free, and I don’t know if you’re looking at the most recent poll which I will reblog shortly which does not have comments enabled just to get straight statistics without explanatory bias, but that’s the one that gets looked at and the post gets updated by me occasionally if there are enough additional votes.

If you submit your opinion I will post it, and add it to the collection of statements people have made on the subject.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

I'm not sure if my thoughts on genderbending even matter bc I'm cis, but I've kinda thought of it like having cis male on one end of a pipe cleaner and cis female on the other and just bending the pipe cleaner and rolling with whatever part of the spectrum lines up with the canon gender identity of the character. It's the way I've defined it, so making male characters female -- be it turning them to a cis female or a trans girl -- is genderbending to me.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Honestly the problem that I (trans guy) have always had with genderbends (in the mind set that they CAN BE and very often ARE transphobic, but not always and not inherently) is that people almost always equate swapping someone's gender with swapping each and every sex and secondary sex characteristic. And calling it a day. When a genderswap is indistinguishable from their counter part except now they have boobs or something like that I can't help but feel like [1]

the character's gender identity is being reduced down to their body. If the character is distinguishable - maybe close enough to be a twin, but still different - then the issue isn't the same. But I hate being reminded that people see gender by how a body looks. Especially when the body is exaggerated (hyper curvy genderbent women; muscular, triangle-torso genderbent men) to fit cis norms. I don't feel like enough people examine why lazy genderbends can be hurtful enough [2]

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Regarding the poll, I'm a transmale whose gender identity has jumped all over the place over the years. I write a character that has a cisswap verse, but this doesn't change anything. Similar to the anon that mentioned a male character behaving femininely. I don't believe that genderbending is transphobic, but I believe calling it cisswap is. Does that make sense? But I don't think people should feel pressured to be diverse for the sake of it as opposed to if it actually fits the character. 1/2

  2/2 Sometimes when a character is to be genderbent, this means them being cis. I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing. It’s the same with real people. Some are cis, some aren’t. Sometimes that’s just the character. Sometimes a character not being cis just doesn’t suit them.         

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

my response got cut off so i’d like to submit it in full here: NO!!! if i struggle with accepting my given gender why would i want to put a character through the same dysphoria i feel on a daily basis? so i can feel it during the ONE HOBBY i can escape it with? so tumblrinas can feel better about themselves when they have no idea how i feel to begin with? are you going to make a cis female RP only as a cis female because she’s ‘genderbending’ her writing style having her write a male character?  genderbending isn’t slapping tiddys on a guy. or a willy on a girl. genderbending is rping the same character with a different biological makeup. furthermore, if you DO rp the character as trans, once they reach complete post-op, and are fully recognized as a female or male, are they transphobic and #problematique now because they aren’t transitioning? GENDERBENDS AREN’T TRANSPHOBIC!!!!!

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

Re: poll; from agender (I just voted NB), I say not inherently, unless done to sexualize. Simple shuffling of gender is one thing because it’s always interesting to explore how childhoods might be different (I play a character whose father emotionally abused him for being too traditionally feminine, so it’s interesting to explore a world in which this character was a gentle daughter rather than gentle son), and “NB Chell!” is fine, but “Luigi but female and HOT!!1!” is another thing altogether.

Thank you very much for your vote, and you are right that distinction is important. I should have added the word “inherently” to the poll label tbh, as that was my intent with the line of questioning.

I love the clarifications a great deal, especially when they’re detailed, and I am glad you decided to tell me more about what you think on this subject. It is great to see so many opinions.

[sexlessrpmemes-mod-human]

(Accident Anon) Sent: Non-binary Trans Masculine Meant to Send: Yes/Usually (Non-binary Trans Masc)

Got it, thank you very much, that will be kept in mind.

Hope you are having a lovely day, and thank you for voting