#HisMysteriousPowers

Heated Rivalry Sideblog | Main @queen-evanlyn

[shaneboleyn]

Hi, I'm Elian shaneboleyn, and I mostly reblog things here!!

I'm also on dreamwidth, where I post my hr icons! If you're on dreamwidth, you should join the game changers/heated rivalry comm if you haven't already.

I also write fic:

bad decisions (M, 0.5k) Drunk at an award ceremony, Shane hooks up with Scott Hunter. A couple of months later, Ilya and Scott talk about it.

Poor(ly) Timing (G, 1.3k) Ilya passes out on home ice while Shane's on the eastern seaboard.

kicking at the topsoil (T, 2.7k) Three messages come through from Hayden: I'm so fucking sorry Mnan | Are you OK???? | CALL ME!!!!' Which is concerning enough that Shane does. Or: Hayden accidentally publishes a FanMail video that outs Shane. (No, not that one.)

chorus of my worst thoughts (M, 1.5k) It's the anniversary of his mother's death, and Ilya is deciding whether or not to go to practice.

falling asleep with the lights on (M, 5.9k, incomplete) It's the end of Ilya's second season on the Ottawa Centaurs, and he's ready to spend the next two weeks with Shane. Of course, that's when he has to get sick.

[penandinkprincess]

there's angst in it, too, because what a difficult discovery and an extra weight to have to carry at a time that's already so hard, but the idea of shane having had allergies to stuff like peanuts since he was itty bitty (which is rare but possible) does have one element that i think is kind of funny just imagining yuna's frustration of having been SO fucking careful with what she ate so her breast milk would be safe and then shane got to the "oh, imma GRAB IT" stage of babyhood, and now she's gotta watch out for both what she's eating and what she's even standing near while holding shane

like truly just imagining her being SO frustrated that she is so carefully reading labels and double checking things and limiting her diet so much to make sure she doesn't accidentally poison her baby

and then THIS LITTLE MONSTER has a sixth sense for Deadly To Baby Shanes food and RIDICULOUSLY fast little hands

yuna who hasn't even looked at a peanut for months now wrestling her baby for custody of a peanut butter cookie he snatched off of SOMEONE ELSE'S PLATE as they were standing close by at this party

like it's alarming and exhausting for david, too, but i feel like yuna actively changing her diet because she is shane's primary food supply rn and figuring out what's safe and what's not only to have this little chonky agent of chaos trying to fling himself from this mortal coil constantly would be something she would never let him forget

and tbh? fair

[penandinkprincess]

GOD the idea of poor yuna at this party clocking the reese's at once because GOD she would kill for a reese's (and not in a way she has ever wanted them before. i feel like part of it is the forbidden aspect and the way that makes human brains tend to want them SO much more.)

and SO valiantly turning away.

only for this chunky little monster with hands that move at the speed of light to help himself when an auntie is holding him on her hip (because Big Baby is heavy and can't just be in her arms because it's like deadlifting lol), and he's still figuring out the thing in hand->get thing into mouth mechanics, so they get it away from him before he gets too much of it, but that baby grip is STRONG and he is trying to get his Tiny Poison Fingers into his mouth with every inch of ferocity his big baby body can manage.

they end up taking him to the hospital because he has a contact rash and they're afraid he ended up actually succeeding in eating some, and now yuna's getting a lecture about how what she eats baby eats so she has to be careful-

and yuna is just I KNOW. I KNOW THIS. TRUST ME.

but i am so ridiculously charmed by the idea of them going out to dinner and post-partum has been hard for a variety of reasons (because post-partum is hard even under ideal circumstances) even beyond the eternal struggle of shane trying to fling himself from this mortal coil and them trying to keep his pudgy self earthside, so yuna thought david encouraging her to go ahead and pump a little extra so she could have a good time would just be for like. having a glass of wine at dinner. because in her new mom group that's what everyone else was doing.

and instead david has a special order delivered to their table.

and it's a dessert glass just full to the top with reese's that yuna can eat here because the baby is with a sitter and has milk for the next couple of days and she can just brush her teeth before they leave (he even has a disposable toothbrush with him) and can finally get to eat the reese's she's wanted so much.

yuna cries.

(and also DEMOLISHES those reese's as! she! deserves!)

[penandinkprincess]

Every time Ilya could find out about Shallergies is fascinating to me, so I'd like to add for science:

The CCM photoshoot. After Shane gets added, CCM inform Ilya that he cannot eat peanuts for at least 24 hours prior to the shoot (since they'll be in each other's faces and they don't want to risk killing the #2 overall pick).

Maybe the stylists gossip or smth, but it all amounts to Ilya knowing about the allergy from the jump and being one of the very few who don't treat him like he's fragile or deserves pity.

oh MAN okay okay: so i feel like they wouldn't be telling someone else's medical information, BUT i 100% feel like yuna puts things like an allergy-free set in shane's rider from the very start, and yeah she has to bring down the hammer sometimes especially when shane is new in his career so people are a little eyeroll about new kid on the scene being picky (it's one of the reasons she's ALWAYS on these sets with shane), but it's just a default of, "hey, craft services cannot have X, X, or X, and approved styling products are X, X, and X. all substitutions must be cleared by his management at least 48 hours in advance."

so ilya gets told as part of this shoot, "hey, we don't allow blah, blah, blah on set for allergy reasons" without saying there's actively a person who is being considered here. and ilya is new! he doesn't really know how all of this works yet no matter how confident he has to act about it, so as far as he knows, this is just how ad sets work. i also cannot remember of it was an ask or a question i got, but i THINK someone also told me that stuff like peanut allergy warnings are not super common in russia but relatively VERY more present in north america, so i also 100% buy ilya being like, "cultural thing, maybe? normal for over here?"

and he and shane are making smalltalk at the side of the rink, and ilya brings up that he organized the shoot, and he's still looking for more stuff to say to keep them talking (because tbh? just a lil nervous about talking to his crush especially after admitting he arranged this and still not sure if shane is vibing back or not and also still working on getting fully comfortable with english), so he brings up, "crazy we cannot even have peanut butter here, yes?" because again: DOESN'T KNOW THIS IS A SPECIFIC REQUEST. STILL THINKING THIS IS PROBABLY JUST A LIABILITY THING FOR AD SETS IN GENERAL OR SOMETHING.

and shane immediately is wondering if he's being made fun of or something?? did someone tell??? is rozanov being shitty about this?? is this a dig? but no. he said "we". he's not assuming it's shane's fault (wouldn't be his fault anyway, but it's how shane thinks about it). and he doesn't know rozanov yet, so he's not going to bust out his medical history when he doesn't have to, especially if he thinks rozanov MIGHT be shitty about it if he's going to bring up the set rules. so he just "yeah, they're pretty strict about it." so now ilya is just internally like 'yeah, so okay. this is how things go. his mom is his manager so she probably knows all the rules and told him. noted.' which tbh? kind of a relief. now he knows something important for this career (ooooh ilya).

so they agree to meet up, but ilya has now been thinking about the forbidden allergies purely the way you will when someone brings something up to you and tells you not to eat it (not even spitefully against the rules, just "man, someone mentioned peanut butter and said not to eat it, and now i REALLY want some peanut butter"), so he does something like get thai food with peanut sauce for dinner, and then obvi he has a mint right before meeting up with shane, but he's trying to act SO cool guy and going through the whole bother of brushing his teeth and using mouthwash would feel like Doing Too Much (jesus christ, teenaged boy with a crush). so his breath doesn't SMELL like peanuts, but he hasn't scrubbed any potential traces clear.

and the hookup with them happens pretty quick from first kiss to finishing, so shane at the end is catching his breath...and catching his breath...a-and catching...his breath. and then realizes that his throat and chest going so tight is a reaction and not just being fresh out of orgasm (and really FUCK his life. he gets the first sexual experience he has ever wanted and now THIS? FUCK his fucking EVERYTHING).

and ilya hasn't seen someone have a reaction before, so he doesn't actually know what's happening at first. is this? a freakout? "hollander, are you ok-" but then shane is scrambling up and tearing through his bag and ilya is just ?? what??? is goign on right now?? and then shane finds his epipen and doesn't want to sit on hotel floor because Gross but manages to wobble back to the bed and use it, and ilya STILL doesn't know?? what the fuck is happening?? but hollander couldn't really breathe right and now he stabbed?? himself?? with something?? and ilya can read context clues enough to understand that this is a medical thing, which is alarming, but also shane in the aftermath of using the epipen is shaking violently because that's just a side effect of it, and he's still catching his breath, but ilya bunches up the comforter to put around him because he thinks maybe he's just shivering??

and shane manages to get his breath back enough to say, "hey, ca-can you ca-call an ambulance?" and ilya is ?! yes but ?! and then shane realizes he's still naked so need to fix THAT first (fuck his FUCKING life), so he starts to get up and ilya (who is tbh a little freaked out right now because still doesn't know what's happening but shane looks Not Okay) just gently pushes him back down and grabs his (ever so helpfully neatly folded) clothes for him and puts them beside him on the bed and also puts his own clothes back on SO fast because obviously that needs to happen Now, and when he gets done, shane still hasn't gotten his shoes on or something because shaking still and also still has fucky blood pressure so getting a head rush leaning over, so ilya ends up helping.

and then ilya calls for him and also just. doesn't feel okay leaving him. their rivalry hasn't set in yet and this is the first time they've done anything so what even is there to hide (nothing obvious is on the bed, and beside a crumpled tissue in the bin, there's no other evidence), and also people already saw them talking during the shoot today so not beyond the realm of possibility that they'd just be doing more of that since they're already in the same hotel. and yuna was leaving the hotel earlier to get a drink with a friend or something who happens to be in town, so shane doesn't want to ruin that for her over a stupid reaction (and also wants to feel like an adult and not have to have his mom come running when she already stayed with him all day because of his allergies when he KNOWS it's noteworthy for someone's mom to be doing this), so when the paramedics ask about if anyone needs to be contacted or if anyone's coming along, he very honestly is like, "no, my mom's busy."

and ilya fully on impulse tells shane, "i can come. if you want." because like. he's already here. he still doesn't FULLY understand what happened here. but shane looks really sick rn and he knows from meeting her in the elevator that yuna was leaving the hotel, and he doesn't know why shane wouldn't just call (maybe she doesn't take her phone when she goes out?), but HE wouldn't want to take an ambulance ride by himself if he felt as bad as hollander looks right now (he almost certainly would end up doing it because who else would there be to come with him, but he wouldn't WANT to). and shane is a little thrown, but yeah, he doesn't know him well but it's not like he has a secret to keep from him at this point and maybe not a bad idea to have someone who can call his mom on his phone if he needs them to because of a secondary response or something.

so ilya ends up going to the hospital with him, and they end up talking because what else is there to do in this four hour observation window. and shane confesses to his allergies and being the reason the set couldn't have allergens on it. and ilya can read people. he can see that shane is bracing himself here. but ilya doesn't actually care. he'll chirp hollander and have fun with him, but he's not actually going to make fun of someone's medical condition, especially when they've ended up in the hospital because of it.

(and because. of him then eating something. that triggered that medical condition. oops.)

and they actually end up getting along during this time they've got 1:1, and of COURSE yuna finds out shane's not in his room because she went by to say goodnight and also hand over a new sponsorship deal someone sent over while she was out and got printed in the business center at the hotel to let shane look at it (prefers papers he can touch instead of reading on a phone), but shane?? didn't answer?? honey, you feeling okay?

and now yuna does end up at the hospital and is surprised at finding rozanov there, but as shane is scrambling, rozanov hops in with an excuse of saying he went up to see if shane wanted to work out together (a wink wink that only shane will understand lmao), but then shane started having a reaction. so now what yuna knows about ilya rozanov is that he was actively trying to hang out with her son and be friendly AND he then helped her child during an allergic reaction and even went with him to the hospital after.

and through the power of yuna, ilya and shane end up exchanging numbers because yuna won't say it but she's always excited when shane ends up making a new friend, so she drops a, "why don't you boys trade numbers? then you can hang out the next time you're in the same place for something."

so now they've started texting WAY earlier than in canon, and to shane's mom at least it's understood they're not really enemies right from the start (with the context of ilya is actually nice to shane in person, she understands that the rivalry is just an nhl narrative, and she understands marketing and spin), so she encourages shane in texting him, and even when they're in the same place (like at all stars), she encourages them meeting up and getting dinner together.

and for shane's part, ilya teases him about it later, but it's not mean or exclusionary. they plan on getting dinner with shane's parents for the first time or something and rozanov hits him with a, "i should order peanuts again and try to kill you, do you think? or is twice just bad manners?" and it's such a relief to have someone who thinks it's something that can just be joked about. rozanov doesn't treat him differently now except for asking shane now and then about stuff just because he's not wanting to kill shane the next time they meet up lol.

so even if it's not public, shane and ilya end up being friends (lol) WAY earlier and also have the space at least in private to be like, "i like you and you like me and there's an understanding between us that lets us hang out together and have it be not a big deal."

[penandinkprincess]

GOD this also meaning that rozanov is ilya to yuna and david at a much younger age. and yeah he acts cocky and chirps on the ice, but he's also just a teenager, AND he's a teenager set up to be rivals with their son, but they know from the start in this that that's not actually true. they've had dinner with him before. they check in and ask and get told yeah, shane spoke to him just last week and said yeah he's talked to ilya recently. he was over here...playing video games (lmao).

and they've seen things like them at the edge of an event being dumb teenagers but in a way that's really sweet with ilya trying something and going, "mmm no, they are liars, i think. tastes like poison for hollanders." so they also?? just assume?? that ilya's family also knows they're friends?? and yuna atp has answered questions for ilya before on contracts or brand deals because he doesn't always get translations of things but won't ask because doesn't want to get condescended to, so at a certain point she noticed him frowning at something and looking back and forth between a dictionary on his phone and the paper he was looking at and just pulled a "need some help?" and ilya resisted at first because Pride...but also yes, please.

but then they go up to ilya and his father at this event??? and the vibes are Off??? they know ilya by now so they know he's funny and sociable?? but he is now SILENT?? and glances at his father before he speaks? and uuuuuh that sure is some clues to follow.

and on TOTAL impulse one day, david at dinner or something just so casually observes that the flight back and forth to russia for holidays must be hard. and ilya (who was making fun of shane for not wearing his glasses but also helping him look at the tiny ass allergy warnings on this menu) looks up and SO neutrally goes, "yes, is very long. i don't usually go back. just for summer." because zero chance he's getting into the guilt of feeling relief at having an excuse he knows he shouldn't be using.

but then david AGAIN SO CASUAL is just, "well, if you want a shorter plane ride, you're always welcome to come stay with us."

which is how ilya starts spending holidays with the hollanders and also how ilya and shane face the sexual frustration of being under the same roof for multiple days at a time but also having to be SO sneaky getting in and out of each other's rooms during it lmao.

[penandinkprincess]

MAN the idea of ilya ending up getting to go to like. hollander family christmas dinner because they invited him for the holiday break and absolutely weren't going to just leave him at home, and it's so?? nice??? everyone is a little surprised to see him there but shane is a pro now so?? guess he brought someone with him?? yeah i guess that makes sense since his family is all in another country?? and ilya gets to sit down and eat at a family dinner and even if he knows it's not HIS family, it's still nice?? everyone is so nice to him??

and I'm fucking WEEPING imagining the end of the night when everyone is starting to pack up and go home and he hears david say, "okay, wait, where are mine?" because everyone's in a shuffle collecting jackets and leftovers and kids, and then yuna comes up behind ilya and puts a hand on his shoulder in a "gotcha, stay put" mom gesture and calls back, "I've got one of them. where did shane go?"

and it's totally just in passing and kind of a joke, but also?? he is included here?? he gets to be part of this little unit?? 🥺

[penandinkprincess]

B R U H

(read more because JESUS this post is getting long)

the idea of ilya settling into this over time and getting so close to a version of what he really, REALLY wants (dating shane, getting to own it, having their love live somewhere beyond hotel rooms and doors with locks and shane's bedroom at his parents' house because the guest room bedframe is ABSURDLY squeaky as they've learned the hard way), and he never thought he'd even get this much, so the idea of wanting more just feels recklessly greedy in the way gambling when you're already up $10,000 feels recklessly greedy. he already has SO MUCH and yeah, in the privacy of his own mind and his stupid daydreams and quiet, late night thinking while shane is sleeping on his shoulder, yeah he wants more. he wants shane to be his friend but also his boyfriend.

but if shane doesn't want that, too, and if things go ugly, then ilya loses the first family he's ever felt like he could belong in, and the longer time goes on, the scarier that gets. it's thrilling and fun to play at sneaking around under plausible deniability of bros being bros at 18/19/20/21/22/23, but every passing year is another layer of this thing that could be taken from him. he's so scared of losing what he has that maybe being close enough IS enough.

meanwhile for shane...he's still afraid of the world at large and what they would think, but he's gotten to settle into this little bubble that's felt more comfortable with time. he's still not out to his parents, but if he was...and if ilya was interested the way shane sometimes is stupid enough to think he is, even a little...it could be this and even better.

and this sets the stage for a DELICIOUS reverse of the tuna meltdown. like ilya is setting the stage of what feels like boyfriends, and it's not SUPER different from what they already do because they've been friends so long, but something about the energy of the day gives shane a push to ask if maybe they do this more often. and maybe they get dinner sometimes and it's not just as friends.

and ilya who WAS treating this like pretend boyfriends even though he would NEVER admit that to himself immediately hears breaks squealing in his head. because it's one thing to ACT LIKE IT but you're not supposed to SAY IT. this is supposed to be pretend and it's fun and it's nice and we get to play pretend because we're not saying we're playing pretend. we're both supposed to be operating under the idea that this means nothing. just bros being bros.

and ilya is still SO aware of everything that's on the line, so he wants to be gentle about it and try to get back to what they're supposed to be doing, so he hits shane with a joking, "what? dinner like best friends? so forward, hollander. pike will get jealous."

and it's a rejection. shane can pick up on that. and even if it's not, shane isn't bold enough to go for a round 2 and yeah it hurts his feelings. of fucking course it hurts his feelings. he could taste what he wanted right in front of him and maybe MAYBE it could happen. and then ilya just. shut it all down. gently, yes, but pretty finally.

and now shane doesn't want to spend the night anymore, for the first time in YEARS. it's just assumed at this point they'll be staying over with each other, but now shane just picks himself up and says he doesn't feel good. he must have eaten something bad or something. he's going to go. and ilya who is now used to accomodating shane's allergies and has for YEARS knows damn well there's nothing in this house that's dangerous to shane. he wouldn't let there be.

so shane leaves and ilya has to sit in the weight of maybe he just lost everything ANYWAY. he tried so hard and it didn't fucking matter. it's all gone now.

except. it's not.

shane gets a girlfriend. and it's all over the news. and shane said no to coming over to ilya's house the last time they played against each other with what ilya knows is a bullshit excuse. and ilya can't turn fucking ANY direction about hearing about shane and his great new girlfriend. and because they're understood as rivals but also friends, fucking EVERYONE is nudge nudging him and asking what she's like and how hollander pulled her because of COURSE ilya would know. they have an ongoing tradition of The Christmas Air Hockey Stanley Cup with the old air hockey table at shane's grandma's house when they have a best of five tournament, and clips of them trash talking each other during it gets posted on their instagrams each year along with who won the prize of a tiny cheap plastic cup that the winner keeps for the year. like of all people, of COURSE ilya is the one who would know all the details of shane hollander's lovelife. they're rivals and play hard on the ice, but it's also accepted that they also hang out enough for there to BE something like annual traditions for them both.

and to cap it all the fuck off: dinner with the hollanders invitation because david and yuna are coming to the next game, so of course they'll get dinner with ilya there, too.

and ilya is feeling a little reckless. shane and him still text, but it's stilted now, and there's so many broken things in it. but maybe? if he goes? if he can remind shane that this is easy and good and ilya can fit here? and it can be good again?

and then he gets there to see rose fucking landry at the table, too.

and now he has a front row seat to watching yuna and david be happy for shane and shane being so clearly happy (and if he doesn't look. REALLY happy. that just has to be in ilya's head, right? just wishful thinking?). and he also has to watch things like rose asking if shane wants to split something, and ilya knows shane can't because he's allergic. ilya knows that. he doesn't have to be told that. he's been here for years and he knows shane's allergies like he knows the fucking ABCs and rose landry gets shane and everything ilya has ever wanted and she still asks if he wants to split some fries without even thinking to ask if they were fried in peanut oil (they were. ilya checked. he always checks.)

and of course she's apologetic after and says "oh, i'm so sorry, i didn't even think" and yeah. she didn't. but ilya would. you get what he wants and you don't even care about keeping it safe? (in reality: totally normal for rose to still be learning this. genuinely no malice or lack of care. at her birthday, she even made sure there was an allergy-friendly cake so shane could have some. but ilya is looking at this through You Have What I Want And It Hurts So Bad I Don't Know What To Do About It glasses).

and it's fucking. WEEKS of this. and ilya skips a couple of dinners and yuna AND david check in on him to make sure he's okay. so he starts going back. and yay! yippee!! still has this. still has a place at the table.

but now shane's girlfriend has a place there, too.

so ilya hasn't lost anything but he's also lost fucking EVERYTHING.

and shane has his talk with rose and ends up accepting that he's gay, and part of this is also that he what he really wants just beyond A Man is ilya. and rose atp has been at like two dinners in which shane and ilya would glance at each other and then look like they wanted to walk into traffic so she has Suspicions. so she encourages shane to try again because he admits he already tried. and he doesn't know if he's actually up to doing that all a second time, but he'll think about it.

and then he gets to all stars, and ilya looks miserable and shane has been SO carefully not thinking about the why of that. why ilya has started looking so down whenever he sees him. why his jaw goes tight at dinner when shane or his parents laugh at something rose says. so he SO casually just drops, "no, rose offered to keep people from talking, but we figured we'd go ahead and just let the breakup get out."

and ilya feels like he might have just gotten zapped with electricity as the very dangerous thought of, "what if i just go for it this time?" dawns on him.

because it turns out that all of it doesn't matter if he doesn't have shane at the center of it.

[penandinkprincess]

back around to hilarious: them telling shane's parents about them and having to find out how to navigate the "both of you have seen other people within this time frame what's up with that"

they say they're dating now, and yuna and david are a little surprised but encouraging but also ask how long and mmmm. hm. okay. so...

so they manage to convey the "since the very start, yeah" of it all, but like. yuna and david KNOW about ilya's reputation. they love him dearly but they also know boy was rockstar-style sleeping his way across the nation by all accounts. and also they now know shane was dating rose like. VERY recently.

which means we have, "but, ilya, honey, you were cheating? there were so many-wait, shane? were YOU cheating, too? you even brought rose to dinner!"

which means no matter WHAT other changes there were in this universe, we still get

[penandinkprincess]

GOD the idea of ilya in his Mildy A Demon Because Hurting era doing the STUPIDEST revenge of all time and buying and eating peanut butter inside his house for the first time in years on a night shane is in town for a game but doesn't text to come over because FINE. fine. hollander doesn't want to be here anymore, fine. no reason to keep it allergy-free. hollander doesn't come over anymore, and he has a brand new girlfriend who can make her apartment perfectly safe for him. not that she will. it's like she doesn't care at all, but maybe shane likes that. (like TRULY so hurt-rage brain about this.)

and feeling ABSURDLY powerful in a way that feels good finally after weeks of feeling so shitty, ilya buys the stupid peanut butter, takes it home, cracks it open, and eats it with a spoon sitting on his couch because who cares. he can cross-contaminate everything he wants now. it's not like he has to think about it anymore. he's been doing this since he was a teenager but it's fine. over now. no problem.

and he sits on his couch in this dark house knowing that shane is in the same city as him but doesn't want to see him. and he can only eat this at all because it doesn't matter anymore if he and his home are safe for shane.

because shane doesn't want him anymore.

he manages three spoonfuls before he goes back to the kitchen, screws the lid shut, tosses it in the trash, and then takes the trash outside for good measure. getting it completely out of his house. he goes up to his bathroom and brushes his teeth even though he's not going to bed yet. he doesn't think about why he's doing this even when there's no one to kiss tonight who would need him to do this.

and he feels fine about it. really.

he's so fine.

[penandinkprincess]

OH MY GOD AND THEY STILL HAVE AN AD CAMPAIGN TOGETHER

they've done more of their own separate work as they've gotten older and cultivated their own brands and publicly pushed the rival element of their friendship, but they still do work together sometimes, mainly for work for BIG companies that can afford to have them both

and this one is for like. tom ford or something. they're wearing suits and looking very Serious Face. and in the past, they would have been catching each other's eyes and making each other laugh, ilya more than shane because shane has perfected the art of getting ilya with a single look over the years because it's funny to make him lose the not laughing competition. they've literally been doing this since 18. they're good at it. and it's fun and easy and there's bts footage of stuff like them arguing over snacks (there's more snacks. they just both wanted this one because it's fun to playfight about it), and for shane especially, it's always felt better having ilya on the same set as him. it makes it way more fun for both of them. ilya has even trusted his mom's necklace around shane's neck during shots where his neck needs to be bare for the picture. there's so much fun and trust between them on these days.

but not on this one.

it's stilted, and they stumble around things the way they haven't since they were 18 fucking years old and brand new to this and to each other. shane doesn't make ilya crack up and break because ilya doesn't even look at him. there are too many things in between them now for it to keep flowing when something so massive has buckled and broken and twisted. it isn't fun. it isn't easy. they eat on either side of the set. they're not playing words with friends on their phones in between set-ups and then playfully verbally abusing each other about their scores. they don't speak. they don't look at each other. they don't split a pack of chips because shane will protest about the macros but also end up taking all of the ones ilya hands him.

for one shot, ilya has to take his necklace off, and shane halfway perks up, ready to at least have this little gesture of trust, this little sign that he and ilya still have an understanding between them, that-

ilya puts it in his pocket.

shane sits back down.

[penandinkprincess]

GOD the idea of ilya in this verse having had practice at making Shane Specific Food since literally the very start, and so ilya's house is a double indulgence of time with ilya and food he wouldn't bother making for himself because why have flavor when he can just make do with function. like ilya's house is fully conceptualized as Designated Place I Have Fun And Enjoy Myself.

and after the tuna meltdown, he doesn't have it anymore.

the idea of being in boston and going back to either bringing meals along or having something prepped by the team nutrition team and trying to hide it or having to go through the hassle of going to a restaurant and having to take the risk and just hope they listen or just buying things at the grocery store and having Ingredient Meal, which is fine sometimes but a bummer when you know what you COULD be having

and GOD the idea of shane craving something specific that ilya is really good at making. but is he even allowed to ask for the recipe? or a reminder of what exactly goes into it? he types and backspaces and types and backspaces and types and backspaces and then gives up and just tries to guess.

it doesn't taste right, and somehow it's one of the worst blows yet.

[penandinkprincess]

GOD the concept of ilya at LEAST getting to keep games with shane. and yeah he goes a little rougher during the games than he should because yeah he's hurt and maybe not handling it well (even gets some playful-scolding texts from david and yuna about "hey, boys! not so rough out there!") but this is HIS. rose landry can wear a hollander jersey and smile for the camera all she wants, but here on the ice? this is ILYA'S. he and shane have shared this ice before rose was ever in the picture. if he doesn't get shane before or after anymore, he still gets him here.

and then shane has an allergic reaction and is on med leave and can't make the game.

and the news doesn't mention what happened to have him on med reserve, but ilya Knows and texts the group chat (and at least rose isn't in HERE) (...yet) to ask if he's okay and what does he get?

picture of rose sitting beside shane in the hospital

and it's another chair ilya has lost to her because it wasn't really his to start with

and he plays that night on ice with no hollander on it, and boston wins

and yet he still feels like he's lost

[penandinkprincess]

oh my GOD the idea of the accident on the ice happening the first time they're back together after florida and ilya's father's death and there is TRULY nothing holding them back anymore, and ilya has back what he wanted and has now fully experienced losing and it can be GOOD again and they've started playing around the edges of telling shane's parents

and then shane gets taken out on the ice and ilya has to face the idea of losing what he JUST got back

and he's allowed to go to the hospital immediately after the game this time and sits and waits for shane's parents to get there (because ilya is his friend openly in this verse, but friends still aren't cleared to get medical information unless specific papers were signed, and i don't think they would have been atp) and thinks about the conversation they might have to have if shane isn't okay instead of the one he and shane wanted to have with them

[penandinkprincess]

it's actually so important to me that even before they had REAL space for it in the cottage, ilya and shane have always been able to understand when the other is going "play??"

everyone always seems so surprised when shane is funny or makes a joke, and i don't think it's meant to be mean, but like? yeah shane is funny. he's always been funny. he's picky about his audience (because he has his image to think about and also because he's just naturally reserved), but he is snarky and quick with it. you know who has ALWAYS found him funny, though?

and on ilya's part, he chirps partially (i think) strategically to have the other team playing annoyed because that's not going to have them on their a-game, but also?? it's for fun. he is puppy nipping and going "play??? play back??? play??" and with almost everyone (because of the reputation he's been branded under), the response he gets is fuck off and a refusal to engage, like we saw with scott hunter. you know who's always understood that this is supposed to be for fun, though?

like these two have SO many communication issues between them, but it's so special to me that from the START they've been able to go, "play????" "yeah, i'll play"

[penandinkprincess]

unreasonably amused by the idea of itty bitty shane not wanting to get off the ice after practice to the point that david gets ON the ice to get him, so itty bitty does the "my bones are gone now" resistance move kids are so good at.

but fails to consider that ice is. so slippery.

like stage your protest all you want, buddy, but you have literally never been more move-able.

[butimaficwriter]

Read the post and loved it exactly for the potential of what's in the tags: uh oh now David made it funnnn and Shane, quick little bean that he is, riiiight as he's getting to the edge of the rink, about to be picked up and passed to mom, gets up and skates away to the middle of the rink and PLOMP lays down on his back, giggling and kicking his little skates. "Again, Dad (Shane does not call David daddy in front of his friends, he's not a baby!), again!!"

It doesn't help David and Yuna that everyone and their mother thinks this is the funniest, cutest thing ever and laughs, just spurring Shane to do it more and more.

[penandinkprincess]

OH MY GOD

coupled with the idea of shane's conversation with rose when he talks about how hockey got less fun because it got more intense and so so did he: the idea of ilya dramatically flopping on his back on the ice one day at camp when they're done running drills with the kids

and he is teasingly refusing to get up because he is dead now, hollander, can you not see this, and shane hesitates for just a second, grabs his hand, plants one of his skates, and just sends him sliding off towards the side of the rink, thinking about how his dad used to do it to him after every single practice

and ilya laughs and shane laughs and for this moment at least, being on the ice is nothing but Fun again

[penandinkprincess]

@somanystars G O D

shane as a teenager who still refuses to leave the ice after practice, but it's not for fun anymore. it's because he feels like he didn't do well today and needs to practice more, get faster, get better, get-dad, get OFF the ice. you're in the WAY.

just so frustrated with himself and mad because he's BETTER THAN THIS he KNOWS he's better than this. and david tries to get an arm around his shoulders and shane just defaults to. sitting down. go home if you want, he'll just-

the idea of david starting to gently swing protesting teenaged shane around by a shoulder pad until he can't help but smile at least because GOD dad you're SO weird, but rn it's just him and his dad on the ice together, and the spotlights feel a little less blinding

[meghan-maria]

AAAA there's an adorable clip floating somewhere of Brad Marchand and his daughter on the ice and this child just completely drops and starfishes on the ice, and that dad knows what to do! He uses his hockey stick to push her leg until she's spinning like a little ninja star on the ice, only for the other child to plop down and demand the same. He had two little kids spinning like turntables and giggling like drains I love it

Extension on that of yuna or David with little toddler Shane. And how one day kids get carried for the last time or whatever, but he officially outgrew ninja star time, he just got too long and lanky and yuna had a moment about that.

David relives his glory days spinning the under fives at camp and becomes the favorite of three coach Hollander-Rozanovs. Ilya adopts it as a game for teammates kids in his quest to be superior uncle

[penandinkprincess]

GOD i know yuna BAWLED the day jackie tagged shane in a post on instagram of him doing turntable time with the pike kids when they came to the arena one night during a family event

her baby turntable now spinning baby turntables

[penandinkprincess]

@connorsbackpocket "calibrates his brain like a wii remote" has me in TEARS from laughing

[pluvialcity]

shane hollander is one of those little freaks who actually uses the leashed safety clip on the treadmill (that automatically stops the machine if it unclips)

Ilya (who manifestly does not use the safety clip) eats shit one time when they're having a treadmill race, and after Shane makes sure ilya's not injured he starts to make a face that is so unbearably smug and gleeful that ilya has no choice but to tackle him onto the nearest yoga mat to shut him up

[penandinkprincess]

i feel like an underdiscussed element of the locker room situation is also that shane had time to get fully dressed and still had to fuck around and pretend to be putting on his shoes to buy time and make an excuse for still being there by the time ilya came out, still wrapped in a towel

like i know my man's shower routine is not THAT fucking intense my GOD

which means that ilya fully 100% was deliberately giving shane time to get dressed and be gone if he wanted, which i find extremely sweet, honestly

[penandinkprincess]

Thinking about the Hollanders and face blindness on this evening. Obviously yuna is a bloodhound and has everyone’s face down to the micro expressions across the league and advertising realm but it would be so funny to me if David and Shane both had some level of face blindness. First of all bc it’d be a torment nexus for Shane being surrounded by same haircut same face same terrible fashion white men on the regular (thank god they all wear their names and numbers on the back during games)

also specifically because hand to god I do not think David recognized Ilya when he caught them making out at the cottage. David’s mortified bc he interrupted his son kissing a boy he did NOT know about the nuclear bomb that is his son kissing ILYA ROZANOV! David could not pick anyone in the current nhl out of a rigged lineup. Yuna wanting to shake him by the shoulders when Ilya walks through the door bc what do you mean why didn’t you prepare me for this! But if Shane didn’t introduce him David would’ve thought this guy has a fun sense of humor wearing a Boston shirt whereas the Mach 5 kill bill sirens are going off in Yuna’s mind as she stares at thee Rozanov ™

god the ENDLESS relief of ilya's fashion choices making it easy to pick him out of north american crowds

if they ever go on vacation in europe, though?? rip. it was nice having a husband while it lasted. he's gone now, back among his own kind. farewell, one of you men in a bold patterned half-unbuttoned shirt. 😔

[penandinkprincess]

your post about ilya finding out about shane’s allergies during the ccm shoot and later spitefully eating peanut butter in his house while shane is pulling away/dating rose made me think of this reddit post! https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/s/Ww5fEoz0SB

people had left comments about how it could be Really Bad for this guy’s wife to see hotel room charges and stuff out of nowhere and have the usual assumptions about what that might mean.

i’m picturing ilya just dyinggggg for some peanut butter, but he doesn’t want to make shane feel bad for his craving, and he also doesn’t want to risk indulging where the contamination could potentially hurt shane. and thus he has the secret peanut butter hotel rooms of shame and indulgence. and of course, shane eventually finds out about the hotel rooms and the real reason that ilya is booking them.

oh MAN i see this and raise you: shane and ilya of course always room together after they're both on the ottawa team except ☝️ in the cities where there's a candy store that has something made with peanut butter that ilya REALLY loves.

it's just Understood that in san francisco, ironically, they are no longer gay married ("ilya, we are still married, what the fuck are you talking about") because ilya must meet with his mistress (z. cioccolato candy shop) and enjoy her tender affections (peanut butter fudge).

alternatively: during shane's annual Mango Time, ilya gets a hotel and has concurrent Peanut Butter Time.

[penandinkprincess]

"FUCK san francisco"

"but roz?? don't you always go to that one shop when we're there?? i thought you really liked their fudge."

"the fudge cannot help where it is from. you are from fucking nebraska you should understand this."

[penandinkprincess]

Shallergies Shane being so used to bringing his own food to team parties, so he shows up to his first Centaurs bbq with a neatly packed tupperware container of safe and boring foods...

Only to find food set aside specifically for him (double wrapped!!), neatly double-wrapped for no cross-contamination, labeled with any and all ingredients a brand new disposable foil pan on a part of the grill because Bood wasn't sure which level of deep sanitation was necessary to make the grates safe after years of grilling Cassie's famous peanut sauce chicken thighs on it, at least one easily visible epipen in each room, and Ilya already on a military style search action to sniff out any possible remaining allergen contact points.

The expected hardest part of the first team bbq: all the socialising

The actual hardest part of the first team bbq: *not bursting out into tears after less than two minutes*

(Shane, 30, finally learning what it is like to be part of a team where everyone supports each other, is *struggling* with his feels*... and is very touched and very jealous of the mango salsa on the Do-Not-Let-Shane-Eat table)

oh MAN

i feel like shane would be more likely to eat at home and then just stick to a ginger ale or get a little bit of something on a plate and shove it around with a fork for cover just because bringing your own food places does invite questions, and especially when he's getting to know these people for the first time, i don't think they're going to be questions he wants to answer.

and i am imagining him planning to just stop by the store or something and get like. a fruit tray or a thing of potato salad. or maybe even just ice or something. none of the food would be safe for him, but it wouldn't be if someone else made it anyway, and at least this way he is doing The Correct Shared Food Party behavior. and i am imagining ilya like. already planned to make something and does, so shane is feeling a little better because even if it's ridiculous to make a giant pan of something that adheres to his needs (and swear to GOD if he has to hear anyone speculating about how this doesn't taste right-), but yeah, okay. as long as he keeps an eye on what utensils get used, he'll have something reliably safe he can put on his plate. cool.

and 100000% i feel that bood would use allergies as an excuse to get a second grill. he HAS TO, babe. it's for ALLERGIES. this is a MEDICAL NEED, cassie!! he has to!!! if he poisons people, he will lose his credentials as bbq master!!!! his reputation is on the LINE!! (this is an excuse just to get a second grill) (cassie knows this) (but sure, whatever, knock yourself out)

and then he gets there?? and there's already a No Poison Food zone?? and it's a joking thing so it's lighthearted, but everyone is compliant about it. someone puts a bottle of (sealed) salad dressing in the area and then gets (playfully) read the riot act for bringing their POISON into the sanctity of THE NO NUT ZONE ("that is not what it is cal-" "NO NUTTING ALLOWED IN THE ZONE"). banished! banished to jail!

and i am now deeply in love with the idea of shane wistfully sighing at his forbidden love kept apart from him due to proximity to jail food. it's not her fault she's in bad company. she's innocent in this. she's- ("shane if you keep eye fucking the mango salsa, i am going to be very mad at you. we are in the no nutting zone, hollander. behave.")

[penandinkprincess]

Ok I don't remember if it was you personally who introduced Scott's blueberry allergy to The Canon but regardless you're the hub for the allergies so I'm sending this to you

I think there would be a psychological component to the "good luck charm" of the blueberries bc as we know repeated exposure can make allergies worse so while the chances that he'll have a bad reaction may be low, they're never zero. Maybe even just subconsciously there's a part of him that's like "what if this time its Bad" but unfortunately his response to that is "better make this game fucking Count" like if he's gonna have to get med evac'd during a game it might as well have been a good one

i have not done any scott allergies so was not me

BUT I'M HERE FOR IT

[hollzy-baby]

Their last season before they retire, and shocking everyone (but themselves), the Centaurs go on a spectacular run in the playoffs. They’ve both just turned 42 and this is absolutely the last season if either one of them wants to have hips worth having - but they play like they’re in their late 20s again, the familiar magic supported by a very young, new core to make up what they lack in speed.

And it seems like maybe, maybe, they might get just one more cup. It goes down to game seven, and Shane makes a spectacular no-look pass to Ilya that keeps them in the game, it’s all tied up when the quick, new, young left wing from Seattle tips one in at the buzzer.

And they’ve lost, and Shane will probably drive them both crazy for the rest of their lives occasionally going back to that game tape. And Ilya is knocking into him, disappointed but he knows this team (sans them) will be back there soon) and telling Shane it would have been almost greedy to have that last one, Shane has 6 after all. And telling Shane that he’ll make it up to him when they get to the hotel (they will make out and nip and fall into separate beds so they can stretch out and arrange ice bags as needed)

But as they watch the cup being passed around and the players’ families coming out to the ice, Ilya nudges Shane and they watch as a young D-man, he just finished his first full year in the MLH, wraps another young man in his arms and smacks a playful kiss on his cheek before turning his head and kissing him sweetly.

He’s just an average player - Shane thinks he could have a decent if not spectacular career if he keeps developing - and he kisses his partner right on the ice. The cameras don’t pause over the scene, no one on his team gives it a second look, it’s not even mentioned when Shane watches the game coverage.

And Shane wouldn’t trade the life he has for anything, but he can’t help the tears and the flash of jealousy and finally the deep satisfaction of knowing that the next generation might just get to play hockey.

[ravenclairee]

HUDSON WILLIAMS and SOPHIE NÉLISSE at the 2026 Canadian Screen Awards photographed by Jake Rosenberg

[neds-bastard]

EVERYBODY SHUT UP ILYA DEFINITELY HAS A HOCKEY CARD OF SHANE IN HIS PHONE CASE AND YOU KNOW ITS ONE OF THOSE CLEAR PHONE CASES AND AS SOON AS HE GOT THE CARD HE JOKINGLY ACTED LIKE A FAN AND WENT TO A MEET AND GREET AND HAD HIS HUSBAND SIGN IT. YOU KNOW, THE ONE HE LIVES WITH. AND YOU BETTER BET SHANE WAS ABSOLUTELY SMILING HIS ASS OFF.

[etheltempest]

[cuppydogshane]

when shanes autism gets involved in the sex >>>>>>>>>>>

[cuppydogshane]

he loves to get clear instructions and have a heavy weight squarshing him........

[cuppydogshane]

They Said I Would Never Do Another One..............

(hollanov x a place you can meet me - carol ades)