Introduction/My Story
WARNING: Story of miscarriage and emotional aftermath of miscarriage, but no mention of graphic details
My name is Caroline!! My pronouns are she/her and I’m 28 years old. I live in Appalachia (West Virginia, to be specific) and I like crocheting, writing, reading, doodling, journaling, taking pictures outdoors, and learning about the plants and folklore of my state. I have an almost one-year-old tuxedo kitty named Peanut who is spoiled rotten and acts like it too :)
I’m also a Christian witch and I enjoy learning about different church denominations, viewpoints, and beliefs, even if I don’t necessarily agree with them. I have my own viewpoints and beliefs in my faith that I stick by, but I just like seeing what other people in Christianity think about God and Satan.
Now for the sad part of this introduction.
On May 30, 2025, my fiancé and I found out that I was pregnant. We were both shocked and scared; the pregnancy was unplanned, we had only been together for four months and we were in the middle of moving in together (we had just signed the lease for our apartment two days before this). We got moved in together, got settled in, and were excited over the next five weeks as our baby I was carrying grew. Unfortunately, however, on July 10, 2025, when I was 9 weeks 4 days pregnant, I had a miscarriage. That was the most terrifying and overall worst day of my life thus far. We decided to go ahead and name him (I had the intuition that he was a boy before we ever got to find out the sex of the baby), so we named him Christian Douglas. It gave us some small comfort that we had a name to go with who we were mourning.
Both of us were saddened and heartbroken, as well as confused because the life path we were on, the child we were supposed to have, and our child’s entire future life were all gone in an instant. In the months that followed, we were both angry to an unhealthy extent at the fact that our life was supposed to look different than how it was, and we took it out on each other.
We both eventually had to get help (he got on antidepressants and I got on antidepressants and started going to counseling). We’ve improved our relationship so much to the point that we feel ready to try to conceive again soon. Time to heal, open communication about our grief, and just spending genuine quality time with each other have played a huge role in getting us back to a place where our anger comes out less often and in healthier ways.
The whole reason I started this blog is so I can talk freely about my grief, my hobbies, and my life in general. I’ll try my best to post regularly, and I hope you all enjoy :)
