Anxiety Is One Hell Of A Problem.

[shewassonder]

Why do i even have a phone.

[shewassonder]

I quit my job because of you.

I lost my dogs because of you.

I lost my house because of you.

I lost myself because of you.

[depressedanxietydeath]

Anyone wants to cry with me?

[shewassonder]

My hearts breaking all over again.

[hazy-october]

[lonely-and--sad]

[socialpsychopathblr]

[shewassonder]

And then you called.

“I’m going to need you to feel better.”

Why?

“Because I’ll be there in 52 minutes.”

Today was so special to me. You gave me all my favorite things. You made it impossible not to smile.

Sex and snuggles. Mexican food. Sunflowers and cemeteries. Coffee and cigarettes. Quality time.

Your big hugs and sweet kisses.

You have made today such an amazing day when i thought i wouldn’t even get out of bed. Thank you.

You’re truly my best friend. And I’m so glad that there isn’t anything that’s been able to break us no matter how hard it tries. It only makes us stronger.

[shewassonder]

Funny because I’m pretty sure you knew this was my diary and the only place i have to go with my secrets. So to use it against me is kinda fucked up. Especially after what you did. Also think it’s funny because if you have a problem with me i think you should take it up with me instead of talking shit but hey that’s just me.

[shewassonder]

I have no words that are mine to express how i feel So I’ll listen to the words of others to learn how to deal

Deal with the fact you’re gone, at least in that way. I thought it’d be easy when you swore you’d stay.

You were my happiness and that was my mistake, Because without you i don’t have an escape.

Dependent isn’t something I’ve ever been, And now without you i don’t even have a pen.

You said you have to hit rock bottom before you can go up, But honestly i just want this world to stop.

And no it isn’t you, it’s me.

Such a fucking cliche

But i need to make that clear, You have my heart but not my brain, my dear.

You can’t take away the pain that controls my every move, And honestly i have nothing left to lose.

Maybe i have words buried deep down. But i don’t know how to breathe, just drown.

Drown in the endless thoughts and i haven’t even a kiss.

Just the memories of you, me, and this.

[shewassonder]

My favorite message at night.

[shewassonder]

Alabama means a lot of things.

It means only two more months with you.

It means never being able to call you mine again.

It means leaving my heart in Ohio.

It means you’re too many hours away.

It means never seeing Nova again.

It means i won’t have your hugs.

Your kisses.

It means all I’ll have is a phone call. And pictures. And stupid memories.

You say it might be best for me and it could turn my life back around. But my life will never be how i want it again. Because you’ll be gone. This is like our fucking break up all over again. Only real.

[05am]

[ravenclawreign]

[insurfarei]

[shewassonder]

Why don’t i matter to anyone? Every thing is just fake. I’m better off dead.

[shewassonder]

Maybe it’s because you know how bad i want you that you don’t care. But i can’t sit here and hold your hand while you cry about Rachel or Erica. You have my whole fucking heart and i can’t keep ripping it apart because you just want people who don’t want you anymore.