NYC Snow Days by Jose Tutiven
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NYC Snow Days by Jose Tutiven
You rarely have time for everything you want in this life, so you need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are.
Fred Rogers (via creatingaquietmind)
Keep going. No matter what you do, no matter how many times you screw up and think to yourself “there’s no point to carry on,” no matter how many people tell you that you can’t do it – keep going. Don’t quit. Don’t quit, because a few months from now you will be that much closer to your goal than you are now. Yesterday you said tomorrow. Make today count.
just keep going.
BEGIN AGAIN
I had been feeling for a long time that everyone around me has been moving on, but I felt I was staying still and it was such a struggle for me to get past feeling like everyone was just waiting for me to do something exciting with my life. After living in the new year, it made me grateful for all of the ways I have been progressing in all aspects of my life and my life is exciting every single day is such a gift and blessing.
The past few months, I have been thinking and worrying a lot… about this future, making decisions and thinking about all the decisions I have in the next period. Even in just past week, my feelings, personality, and spirit have changed and matured from what they were. I feel much closer to my Everlasting Numero Uno and Savior. I feel an increased love and respect for my siblings and parent. I feel closer to graduation and I feel more grown-up. I feel more love and gratitude than I ever have before. I realize my insignificance, but my capabilities to do great things if I have faith. I finally realize that I’m moving on everyday…just in a way that may not be measurable or comparable to many of my peers and friends.
… and despite how hard it is to believe at times. You’re moving farther from me.
The more I’ve thought about you, the more I’m beginning to think we will have had no past. No history…no previous conversations or dates. I think it’s going to be all fresh and new. Maybe not. I don’t know everything, but I do know you will be the someone I have a future with… a future that extends into the eternities.
“What if someone you never met, someone you never saw, someone you never knew was the only someone for you?”
When I did meet you, it would be the one of those “Hey… it’s nice to meet you.” moments. A favorite quote of mine comes from The Alchemist, a book by Paulo Coelho. I completely fell in love with it the moment I read it:
“…But maybe people who felt that way had never learned the universal language. Because, when you know that language, it’s easy to understand that someone in the world awaits you, whether it’s in the middle of the desert or in some great city. And when two such people encounter each other, and their eyes meet, the past and the future become unimportant. There is only that moment, and the incredible certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only. It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world. Without such love, one’s dreams would have no meaning.”
So good, aite? I know I’m young, but I’ve given a lot of thought about the kind of man I want to marry. I know he is out there somewhere, and I already love and pray for him daily. I could know him now or he could live clear across the country. Whatever the case, I know that he will be my best friend, and we will take care of each other for all eternity.
One of those moments where we feel incredibly comfortable and incredibly intimidated at the same time. It could be in the next month, the next year, or years down the road. It’s been so interesting to see the way things have unfolded in a way that I never planned on, but I can tell you one thing.. it has all been so much more amazing than I wrote about when I was eighteen to nineteen.
So for now, I will continue to move and progress to become a better person for that moment, our moment.
Love,
SD
{ something to be grateful for }
don't merely focus on how far you still need to go. don't whine about the distance ahead of you. each time you feel like giving up, look back for a while. look back and be amazed of how far you've gone, be reminded of how much you've sacrified to get this far, be grateful for all the obstacles you've overcome that has made you stronger than before. don't quit. not now, not ever. this photo was taken at corn field. on my way to Prigi Beach. a while a back ago.
DEAR, MY BEAUTIFUL MESS
To the stupid yet so brave guy, your ugliness equal to your handsomeness, my imam, gummy smile master. To the one who has a lot of thought that he keeps by himself, my family guy, one of the reason of my joy and my sadness. To my perfect flawed man.
Dear, Mr. Perfect B,
Hello.. I wanna wish you a very happy birthday, wish you nothing but all the best things happen in your life.
I don’t even know what to write since I’ve never written a handwritten letter in this past 10 years and it might end up a mess and sounds more like a love letter. But I will just give it a try :) here you go....
<3 Dear, B,
I might not be following you from the very first beginning of your teenage, we’ve known each other since the end of 2010, and I’ve fallen in love for the first time of your appearance-with Reds T-shirt & flipflops. I know I’m neither a beautiful girl nor an amazing person but I believe the amount of love and support I have for you won’t be lesser than anybody else.
I find it kinda funny when I spend most of my time wondering you, a part of “such feels” that i experience, a part of my “I don’t really pay attention to my professor in the middle of the lecture”, a part of preface on my final project of diploma, a part of sleepless night. But those things really keep me entertained. I don’t even know whether to thank you or blame you for this, “BAP, you ruined me!” and I can proudly say that my life now is such a “BEAUTIFUL MESS” <3
I am so happy that I can be this far loving you, praying for you, supporting you. you went through a lot of things. Thick and thin. Ups and downs. And never did I leave your side. I never will. You’ve been doing fantastically amazing since your graduation, B, I’m so proud of you. don’t know what to say but really wanna meet and praise your Ibu for having you. You have never failed to make me smile even it hurts.
If I should wish you things, I might end up breaking my hand from writing because I really have a lot of wished for you. one thing.. please do take care of your health. Don’t eat too much instant noodles. Eat more fruits... BANANA! It’s easy to eat but you can always ask someone to peel it and cut it for you... stop being such a baby... :p
I am no longer seeking for being B’s love. I am now completely just a B fan girl, haha.. when the reality strikes hard, sometimes I think that I should have been doing something more realistic out there instead of spending my time waiting but then I always convince myself that waiting for BAP is never a waste of time. Stanning you is more than just loving your male-God face and your perfect figure but you really give me a lot to learn and appreciate about life which I treasure the most.
Up till now, I’ve been always thankful that i had the chance to meet you, to know you, to have you – a lovely and caring person. Despite the sad things in the past, all the memories between us were so beautiful, thinking about that time again, I have no regret. I can’t help myself. you gave me a thrill. You gave me an amazing dream. You blinded me. Thank you for being “You”
I don’t know why I’m writing this far, just wanna bring up something to talk with you. I always tell myself to forget you so I can move on, slowly, starting a new life without you around. But no matter how busy I am, or how I try hard to fill up my mind with work, I still miss you, wondering if you take care of yourself, if your stomach still hurts...
Did you remember that long time ago i showed you my future table plan? Now I’m trying my best to do it. I’ll give myself 3 years to experience things, grow up and enhance my knowledge. My mother doesn’t want me to face difficulty, but my work is not that hard. I know I have lots of things to do, I have to stay strong. Whenever I miss you, I will re-read all of the text you wrote for me. Maybe you don’t love me anymore, or maybe what’s between us right now is more than love... no matter what, I will still treasure you and everything you did. I put all the songs I listen to for you, remembering every single line of them...
It’s just that I don’t want to tell you, I don’t want to be a burden to you, I’m just trying and trying to make you understand... and i tell you, that someday you will thank me for leaving you...
God knows that I still got a lot to say, but let me keep that in mind and universe knows that i love you so much. I won’t say that I’ll love you forever cause forever can lasts only for 7 mins, so let’s stop counting? I actually had to halt writing for awhile because I didn’t want to wet this paper with my tears hehehe.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY once again
Be a good guy, okey? Never give up on your dreams. Shinta Deinsa (as you used to called ‘zooey’) will always be here for you no matter what. And will always support you till the end. I will never ever leave cuz all of me loves all of you, you gave your all to me i gave my all to you, B!
BAP, my Simba, I hope that you are still doing well.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Hakuna Matata.
Love,
SD
PAGE 1 OF 2015
I’ve been thinking a lot on this past year and the changes and events that took place in my life. The good and the bad, all of it becoming a part of who I am today. I think back on the choices I made at the beginning of the year, how I wanted and needed to finally be selfish and try and make myself happy. It led to decisions that I am not necessarily proud of but I will not deny them either, I accept the fact that what happened happened, and it was for me about me, and most of all I needed it in the worst way possible.
I wish for all of us to have a better year, to take what we’ve learned and apply those lessons to out lives. To move forward instead of backwards, and to own our faults. It makes us who we are. But most of all I wish us happiness, and good health. Because all the money in the world cannot give you those two. I, for one am looking forward to putting this year behind me, and I will raise my glass come New Year’s Eve to wave it goodbye and welcome the incoming year.
Thank you for those who’ve help me along the way. Your encouragement in the worst of times this year did not do unnoticed nor will they ever be forgotten. It’s been a rough year,but it was also full of lessons.
opening a new book with blank pages. going to write them with my own words. the book is called 'Opportunity' and the first chapter started today :) HAPPY NEW YEAR 2014!
Love,
SD
January 01, 2015 sky. and suddenly you know, it's time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings. #2015 #newyear #throwbackthursday #tbt #iphoneography
THE END OF 2014
This was the last tangerine candy sunset of 2014 at Siung beach, Yogyakarta and the Sun was all, “byeeeeee!” cheers for the memories and good times. as for the rest, let’s look forward to more such opportunities in the near future, yea?
Love,
SD
holla the last Saturday night of 2014, please give me something great to remember. 😘
TRIP TO NORTH SUMATERA
wow.
HELLO!
It's been quiet here lately. I don't really have any proper time to update the blog, and continually appears on the social media platform instead because it's the easiest way to keep in touch with everyone... But today I finally got an excuse to have a mini update, to share my simple.
I don't know how to thank God anyone better coz u know I'm blessed, lucky and all. i missed home. my family to be exact. it's been 4 months since i went away from home. having fun without my two siblings and my beloved parent. should i consider that as a homesick? It's odd to have a long fun holiday without them. fortunately, my adventurous friendship decided to have a short escape to somewhere beautiful that we have never been to before. I had such precious time with my friend. we had to cross the sea in order to get to this beautiful place, went through 5 hours of road trip and 45 minutes on boat. It was all a decent experience cause we were all beguiled by the lake, view and all the things right when we stepped our feet in our destination. mesmerized by the pristine and velvet lake. just to breakdown your curiousity, I was having our own quality time. here's Lake Toba.
I spent most of my days by chillin' in lakefront or just canoeing beside the pool faced the lake. there's one night that I could not forget (this might be chessy but I swear it was one of the night that I shall not forget), where I had dinner by the lake with the whole family at night whilst sharing our stories and staring to the folk song song and traditional dance show, not to mention that I was also accompanied by cups of ice cubes. lol Everyday is an experience for me. i tried to take every lesson on each day, and thankfully... so far i did know something new everyday. Medan and lake Toba were been so fantastic. i would love to come back here sooner.
JW Marriott Hotel Medan Swimming Pool, I looveee it!
The view from my room is too precious. 22th floor!
Love,
SD
Champs Elysées, Paris, France
saw this scene from the road when i was headed home with mon frère and i just had to pull over and take a photo! #roadtrip #foggy #misty #vscocam (at Kawasan Wisata Telaga Sarangan - Magetan)
The Great Conservatory, Syon Park ,London, England (by Nomadic Vision Photography)
by janis roseanne