Workhorse of Comedy, Student of Improv
(This is a long, rambling mess. Be warned.)
So I had an awakening a few months ago...
I realized that if I want to get a career in comedy-- if I wanna work for... dare I even say it... Saturday Night Live-- I need to start hustling.
There's a thing of looking at the people who have what you want, then doing what they do to get it. You find your own path along the way, but that's a good place to start.
That person for me is Mike O'Brien-- formerly Michael Patrick O'Brien, formerly-formerly Pat O'Brien. I knew him a bit for a little while when he lived in Chicago, and I watched him a lot. He had this show towards the end of his time here called "The POB Show." Basically, he did a bunch of solo sketch/readings/characters/etc, had a musical guest, and also a performer guest with whom he would do sketches and comedic pieces. This show was fantastic. Very inspiring.
POB (that's how I know him, so that's what I'll call him) was a machine. There's some "lore" surrounding that guy that he wouldn't go to many/any parties, so he could just write. He was a comedy creation machine. Not only did he write a lot, he performed a lot. He was on the Second City Touring Company for a long time, then did a revue on the SC Mainstage-- all that in addition to all the solo, sketch, and improv shows he did through out the week. He is my biggest influence in comedy. The stuff I got to see him do in the POB Show and other places really spoke to me. They've stayed with me hard.
So he worked very hard, and he hustled for 9 years straight. He auditioned for SNL twice: once in 2005 and then in 2009, which is the audition that got him the writing job on the show.
I ran lights for his bits at the iO showcase that got him the second SNL audition (not the only thing because he was on Mainstage at the time, I think). But I remember watching and being totally blown away. He was SO funny. I looked down in the crowd, and I saw Lorne Michaels and Seth Meyers laughing really hard. It was surreal to say the least.
I left Chicago shortly after this. I moved back to Florida. I knew I would move back one day (which ended being 3 years later practically to the day). My whole goal while I was gone was JUST to become a better improviser. I wanted the comedy career, but it was such an abstract idea to me, that I didn't know if I could make it a reality. But when I found out POB got SNL, it felt just the TINIEST bit closer. I saw Lorne Michaels and Seth Meyers in the flesh, and then I knew it was real. In the 3 years I was in Florida, I came to terms to the fact that I did want a career in comedy, and that I could get it.
So when I was about to move back to Chicago, I decided I was going to pursue it. I made a list of goals, and I set a year for me to leave Chicago. 2020-- I'll be 32. Same age as POB when he got hired.
I knew that I had to write a bunch and perform a bunch if I wanted to get good. But I fell into doing improv exclusively. And I called myself a "writer." I wrote a TINY bit here or there for the first year and a half, but not enough to warrant calling myself a writer by any stretch.
Then I fell into a huge depression in 2013. Lasted 9 months. I didn't break it til March, but in January, after listening to an obscene amount of podcasts about writing and comedy, I decided to really get my act together and pursue this thing.
For a long time, I thought I didn't write because I was lazy. That's what everyone says. They don't write because they're lazy. I was told that in school too. But I learned that it wasn't laziness, it was fear. I was afraid of being terrible. Once I made that realization, I slowly made steps in the direction to becoming a writer.
First, I bought the cheapest marble composition book, bent it, stepped on it, and generally fucked it up, so it wouldn't intimidate me from writing. I worked on outlines for plays/sketches/tv specs/pilots/etc. None of those panned out, but at least I was doing SOMETHING. Then my friend needed help writing sketches for her show. I offered to help and ended up writing like five or six sketches. Then I decided to try a thing where I write a new piece every three days. Then I started a zine to post bits three days a week. In order to do that, I had to dedicate myself to writing practically everyday. In addition to that, I started writing a sketch a week as well.
Right now, I'm working hard. The next step for me is to start getting out to perform all this stuff that I write and to perform a lot.
And in pursuit of a career in comedy, I must let improv take a backseat. It was starting to stress me out SO goddamn much. I equated doing well in improv to being a successful comedian, and those two pursuits are NOT THE SAME. They have some overlap, but they are not the same. After I realized that, I decided to do improv for enjoyment and to become a better actor. And it has become much easier since I'm not putting that pressure on myself. I've been doing fewer improv shows, and I'm taking classes again, so I've put myself in a place right now to be a total student of improv.
Wow, lotta ramblin. Yeesh.
When I think back to where I was a year ago-- depressed, unmotivated, afraid, self-conscious, full of self-hate-- I realize that I am in a much better place. Right now, I'm exactly where I want to be. Working hard. Creating an huge volume of work. I'm definitely not very good right now. But I know if I keep creating and creating and creating and pile up tons and tons of volume, I'll get there.
And I don't think I'll ever be in the top 10-20% of funny people in this city, but I OUTRIGHT REFUSE to be outworked by anyone.