Hi, Linda. How are Amanda and Diane’s kids doing? Are they settling into the house routine okay? Do they give them a lot of trouble or wear them out, or are Amanda and her wife already getting the hang of it and handling everything like pros? Do you and Ben step in to help whenever you can?
I know you have the twins and Monica, which is a lot on its own, especially at their age—they have so much energy and need constant supervision. How is Ben’s relationship with all the kids in the family? Are they super attached to him and love being around him? Ben is the twins' and Monica’s father, of course, but is he also the father to Amanda and Diane’s children? Does he enjoy playing with them, taking them to school, or going to parent-teacher meetings? Does he read to them, take them for walks around the city, or do you all go on trips together when there's time?
Do you and Ben usually attend school meetings and parties together? Are you comfortable holding hands and being affectionate in public there and elsewhere? Do other moms ever pull you aside to compliment you and Ben on being such a loving, in-sync couple? Do they give you a knowing, welcoming smile when you talk about Ben and your family? I think I remember you mentioning that someone at school praised you and your husband, saying that whatever you were doing was clearly working wonders for the kids' development.
By the way, how are the kids doing in school? Do they enjoy studying and making friends easily? Do you and Ben like helping them with homework, explaining subjects, and giving them 'parental advice'? Do they like going to the library? Do you take them there often? I think cultivating a reading habit is so healthy and vital (for life, really—good books, movies, theater, dancing, art, etc.). It helps them in every way, including their future careers and becoming better citizens. I’ve been following the news about the current administration over there in USA, and I’m worried about how their policies might be affecting education and the people’s well-being.
And how are you and Ben doing as a couple? Are you finding the time and energy to enjoy each other’s company as husband and wife? I know the daily grind can be exhausting, but it can also really bond a couple who truly love being together. Is your intimate life still deep and intense? I mean, is the sex still great and tender, and do you make the most of your time together whenever you can?
Besides you, does Ben share any intimate moments with Amanda or Diane? I mean, you and Ben are husband and wife surely, but are you two exclusive, or does the family dynamic allow others the full freedom to interact and share affection and intimacy?
Oh, I almost forgot to ask: are you and Diane still breastfeeding? Do you have a dynamic where you both nurse all the children in the family who are still at that stage? I think that’s so important for the kids' health, development, and overall well-being. Plus, it really strengthens the bond and your roles as mothers within the family.
Wow, a lot there to answer.
First of all, all of the children are doing very well. Monica will be finishing Kindergarten in a few weeks. She loves school, Ben and I have been attending school meetings together as her mom and dad. Monica's teacher has told us many good things about how Monica loves participating in classroom activities, playing with other children and greeting everybody each day with a smile.
Our twins Michael and David will be starting preschool in the fall, and are excited about that. They have been getting some early childhood classes in their daycare, so they will be ready to dive into more classes in preschool, Kindergarten and grade school. Ben and I also meet with their teachers and other daycare helpers on a regular basis. We attend as any other parent couples do, easily but discreetly showing affection for each other.
And yes as I wrote in the past, Ben is the biological father of Amanda and Diane's children. He is officially their uncle for now. I think Ben would love to be open about being their father, being that fathering children with his sister-in-law is not illegal or incest since they are not blood relatives, but it could eventually lead to people finding out we are Mother and Son. Meanwhile, Ben is a loving and caring uncle to Amanda and Diane's children. He loves them as much as he does our 3 children.
We present ourselves to other people as a couple with children. If they assume that we are married, we let them. If asked specifically, we say that we are "partners". If asked if we plan to get married, we just smile and say that we like the idea. And that is the truth, if we were able to legally marry we would.
As for how Ben and I and Amanda and Diane are dealing with raising our young children, it is a challenge at times, but with tremendous rewards. For me this was my second time around raising babies. I won't say it was easy, but I knew more about what to expect. Amanda and Diane had times when they felt overwhelmed being first time parents, but with the help of Ben, Shelby and I along with some of their friends and neighbors they soon got better at dealing with the demands of 3 young babies. It helped a lot when their son Joey no longer needed diapers, and they are really looking forward to when Rose and Iris do the same. But that will be a while yet.
Joey will be starting Kindergarten in this fall, Rose and Iris will be turning 1 in June, so it will be a few years before they are ready for school.
And outside of school or daycare, Monica, Davey and Mikey love being read to and looking at books. Monica is learning to read for herself. I have taken them with me to work on occasion at the public library. Being a child-friendly environment makes it easy to do that. I hope to do more of that with Amanda and Diane's children as they get older.
So all of us adults are dealing well so far with the demands of parenthood, while keeping our own relationships strong. Ben and I are very much still in love. We try to find time for ourselves when we can, even if it is just a few minutes of cuddling. And still have more intense moments of intimacy now and then. Amanda and Diane seem to be also very much in love. Their recent weekend getaway helped a lot to give them a much needed chance to reconnect as a couple. As their children get older, they will get more opportunities for that.
And the work, home and children demands have also meant that Ben and I and Amanda and Diane have been separate couples with little or no opportunities for sharing physical intimacy between ourselves. But i think we are all open to the idea of an open relationship between the four of us. We will have to see what happens as current demands on our time and energies changes.
As for your last question, yes Diane and i each still breast-feed our children as it is practical. We both feel that it helps our children's health and well-being. And it promotes a special mother/child bond.
I hope that i have answered your questions. There was a lot to cover, but I do appreciate your interest and wanting to know more about me and my family. I hope you re doing well and look forward to more conversations.
