ayy lmao

"Ayy everyone, nice to meetcha! Mikhail Kohut, Super High School Level Architect, and damn proud of it. Looking forward to gettin' to know ya, I guess, just don't be a bore!" Status: Alive [closed dangan ronpa oc rp blog, currently affiliated with broadway despair] [sidebar art by dane]

[shslrapartist-blog]

love changes everything (re: trial attn: mikhail)

[shslrapartist-blog]

…Well, at least his head wasn’t getting bitten off.

This was just sad, though. Sadder than he’d felt about any of these assholes so far, except the ones who’d died. Yuudai wasn’t one to hold grudges - OK, that was a total lie. He was definitely one to hold grudges. But not in a place like this. 

Yuudai bit his lip and looked down.

“I… I thought Chester had died. Because of me. Because I loved him.”

All the justifications and stuttering excuses had gone now. Nobody cared that he was some homo. That was the least of everyone’s worries. And that, at least, was a weight off Yuudai’s shoulders.

“…That stupid-ass wheel could’ve just punished us instead, but instead it took the people we cared about. And it felt like total shit. Him dead because of me. Like something I could never shake off. And, OK, so that turned out to apparently be a lie-” Shit, this wasn’t going well! He was just reminding Mikhail that his own loved ones were still alive! - “But I still felt that way. And you can’t live your life regretting something like that. Loving someone? Having been loved in return? That’s - like - that can never be a bad thing! That’s the greatest thing!”

He stopped and pressed a subconscious hand to his chest. Getting riled up now, but OK, he was a poet and a romantic, so suck his dick. 

“You could be dead right now. But you’re not. You have your life. Some people don’t get much of one. We know that now more than ever. So if you - if you try to spend the rest of it wallowin’, instead of fighting with us to get out of here and back to our lives - then, basically, I’m gonna kick your ass.” 

Ending on that rather feeble note, he elicited an unconscious snort of laughter. This whole thing was so surreal. He was trying to comfort Mikhail. He was… trying to be someone’s strength, instead of just some victim in a corner.

[shslbobthebuilder]

Love. Living. Something about getting their ass kicked. Mikhail was listening, they heard every word that Yuudai said and they didn't even think about interrupting, which was more attention than a lot of people get. Even after he'd finished, they didn't know what to say- what was the right way to respond to something like that? They weren't thinking clearly enough to. They tasted blood. The only coherent though they could form was that, they tasted blood in their mouth from biting down on the inside of their cheek while Yuudai was talking. They hadn't even noticed they'd done it, but they figured maybe that was the reasob they'd been so quiet.  "...I'd l-like to see ya try." Seriously. They wanted him to. They wanted him to beat them to a pulp. Maybe if they were lucky it would kill them. "I can't do this without him, ya d-don't understand. I c-could hardly do it even when he was here, I could b-barely keep myself together then. This is different than that stupid fuckin' wheel, man, this is...th-this is really my fault! I couldn't...I couldn't do anythin' to help him, or to prove to him I didn't need my help, and now he's dead because of it. Because of me. And I just...I don't w-want to live like this anymore, I can't do it, at th-this point I'm just waitin' for someone to put an end to all of it! I'm n-not...I'm not strong enough to live through this. I never was."

[shslrapartist-blog]

love changes everything (re: trial attn: mikhail)

The last thing Mikhail wants right now is to be yapped at by me.

And honestly, Yuudai really just wanted to sink into bed and forget this awful shit happened. Bike boy was… He’d started off so happy, so hopeful. He’d had that stupid little trio thing. And then the murders started, and then… this. It all went to fucking shit.

But Yuudai couldn’t let it go. Not when Mikhail looked like that. He couldn’t just walk away. The kid could snap in this state. Kill themselves or somebody else. And Yuudai’s heart had had a lot of trouble already today. Sort this shit out. 

He rolled determinedly towards Mikhail as they trudged out of the courtroom, cornering them. Shit, Mikhail was a wreck. Well, who wouldn’t be? After that…

“Listen. I know you don’t wanna talk to me. But… fuck. Masaaki wanted you to live. He wanted you to be happy. So live.”

He paused.

“And don’t let hatred fester. That’s how more people die. And if we lose anyone else here I’m really gonna flip my shit.”

[shslbobthebuilder]

A wreck certainly was an accurate way to describe Mikhail at the moment. Their hysterics had ended, but their body was still shaking, tears still pouring down their face with no end in in sight. They’d been broken, that much was obvious, and it didn’t look like they were ever going back.

Masaaki was gone. He was gone and he was never coming back. The one person who cared about them, who loved them, the one person that they could count on to help them survive. Gone, just like that. And even worse, he had died for them. What a twist that had been, and a rather unwelcome one at that- just how weak were they that they needed to be protected to this length?

Yuudai was stopping them, talking to them. Of all people, Yuudai. They thought for sure that they hated him. They thought he hated them right back. And yet here was him of all people, trying to help them. To make them feel better.

Too bad they didn’t take any of it to heart.

“...Happy? How am I supposed to be happy? I can’t- I shouldn't be alive right now. I shoulda died, not him. He made a mistake, killin’ for me. Everythin’ he thought about me...it was all a mistake.”

Their voice was quiet, which had become a common thing by now, and they couldn’t bear to look Yuudai in the eyes as they spoke.

“I don’t give a shit who else dies in here, not as long as I’m one of ‘em. I’m s-so fuckin’ done with this man, I’m so fuckin’ done!”

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

If I'm So Numb Why Does it Still Hurt? | Open |

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

At the feeling of another presence so abruptly next to him, Kenji’s screaming cut short. His mouth, dry with the previous echoes of feeling, was shut tight as Mikhail apologized. When he tried to swallow there was almost no saliva to work with. An awkward desert in both comments and necessary liquid as far as he was concerned. He felt himself flinch at the contact Mikhail offered but did not shy away. 

Kenji kept his hands glued to the side of his head. Despite the lack of moisture flowing in his throat he cold feel a solid amount of it threatening to spill from behind his eyelids. With a deep, shaky breath he willed away the thick tears. What would be the point of crying anymore? He didn’t cry. It made others uncomfortable. It made him feel weak. Everything was already so wrong as it was.

Kenji took in a long, deep breath. He held it in for a few moments before letting it out with a low hiss. Eventually he lowered his hands and turned his head up towards Mikhail. He kept his eyes closed but he did try his best to manage a smile towards his companion. The grin was barely there and looked painfully tired.

"Hahaha…what’re you sorry for, mate? I mean i-it’s not…."

He trailed off. It wasn’t their fault? Kenji didn’t know that. Kenji didn’t know anything anymore. 

Suddenly aware of how weak his legs felt, Kenji fell backwards and landed harshly on his butt. Reaching forward, he shoved his palms into his eyes, pushing up his glasses until they were almost sliding off of his head. He let out an exhausted sigh as the smile disappeared. He didn’t have the energy to smile anymore.

"We had an argument, you know? Jeanne and I…she probably thought I still hated her when she…I’ll be honest, mate I….Haha…I guess I don’t know what to do anymore."

[shslbobthebuilder]

Startled by his movement, Mikhail quickly pulled their hand away, but remained nervously by Kenji's side. Whilst they were glad the screaming had stopped, they weren't sure they preferred the way he had taken to acting now. It was understandable, of course, but rather frightening to see- Kenji, of all people, acting like this. They had seen him upset before, no doubt, but this...this seemed different. And more than they were worried for themself or anyone else at the moment, they were worried for him. 

Unsure of how to handle the situation, they simply tried to avert their gaze, using their now free hand to fiddle nervously with one of the hair ribbons they'd tied around their wrist so long ago. Their eyes darted uncomfortably around the room, trying to avoid looking directly at him out of a mixture of embarrassment and guilt, but eventually they had nowhere else to look.

"I d-doubt she thought that, man...weren't ya like, one of the only people she can- c-could- er, can..."

They cringed slightly as they stumbled over their choice of words, not sure which was worse- referring to their friend's dead girl friend in the present tense, or immediately in the past tense? Trying to move on, they simply finished their sentence weakly and tried to continue

"...stand. Right? She liked ya, and she only liked ya, and she knew ya liked her too, so...one argument can't change, right? One argument doesn't change how ya feel about someone completely, but...I don't know. I dunno what to tell ya, I...I dunno what to do...just..."

They sighed helplessly, looking away again.

"Fuck, man. I don't know. I'm sorry, I don't know."

[shslflowerboy]

As quickly as Mikael began his raucous crying, it almost instantaneously fizzled out. He couldn’t let out anything more than a handful of heart-wrenching sobs. Now, his mourning had devolved to quiet sniffling and long strings of murmured Swedish. It was during one of these muted moments that the he heard the familiar—although noticeably less confident—voice of his friend Mikhail behind him.

The architect’s fumbled condolences reverberated dully in the gardener’s ears. He wanted to bring himself to respond, but the half-formed words dried up in his throat. What was there to say? His best friend was actually dead and gone and there was no way that she was coming back.

For as long as Mikael could remember, his grandmother and mother had dutifully brought him to church every Sunday. He considered himself a believer when it came to religious affairs. However, not even of the concept of “a better place” brought comfort to him now. What good could heaven do him if Nezumi was there and he was here? And how could any god that allowed such a cruel thing to happen be anything like the kind, benevolent benefactor he had been taught about all of his life?

The pinkette found himself staring at the information broker’s empty eyes. He had yet to formulate a proper response for Mikhail. He resumed gently dabbing away the blood trickling down Nezumi’s face. She didn’t deserve to look like this. Finally, he darkly mumbled his reply.

“Y-yeah…anywhere is better than here…”

If there really was a heaven, then to Mikael, Broadway Watarigarasu would be considered hell.

[shslbobthebuilder]

Why can't you do it? Why can't you help him? Why are you so damn useless?

"Ain't th-that the truth..."

They shifted awkwardly where they stood, watching Mikael as he watched Nezumi. They weren't going to look at her, that was for sure, they didn't think they could stand to- they'd betrayed her, hadn't they? Broken off the alliance, and for what? Fear? Pathetic. Shamefully disloyal. What would Mikael think of them now that they'd let down his friend like that? Then again, she was dead now. Maybe it didn't matter.

"...Can't believe she's gone..."

They spoke without thinking, without even realizing they'd spoken. In a way it was almost a relief, they were getting their voice back, regaining that annoying ability to speak without caring what they were saying. Then again, considering the subject matter, was it worth it? Their voice was still shaky, too quiet, their eyes looking unfocused despite being pointed right at Mikael. Is it worth it?

"First person we talked to, right? Aside from each other? Before it all went to shit, on the bus...and I told ya we'd be buddies, and I never followed through...and we all got to know each other, and I promised myself I'd break ya both outta your shells, and I spared ya each some candy 'cause I thought I'd have more than enough to last myself the trip..."

There came that urge to cry again, and they pushed it so far down that it hurt, voice shaking even more. It was so damn obvious how upset they were, how weak they were, and no matter what they did they couldn't stop it.

"B-But we're still here, and I've barely got enough to last a few more days, and I...I didn't talk to ya as much as I should have, and I couldn't get ya home, M-Mikael, I'm sorry I couldn't get ya home! I'm s-sorry I couldn't..."

Their voice broke, and while they didn't start crying right then and there, it was clear that they weren't going to be able to get another word out. They bit down on their lip hard, trying to focus on anything other than the tears they could feel stinging their eyes. Well, they were back to rambling...just not the good kind.

[shslflowerboy]

I Need a Hero✽Ch. 3 Body Discovery✽Open

He should’ve known.

From the moment Kiku came rushing in, he should’ve known that something was wrong. Terribly, horribly wrong.

However, the thought never crossed his mind. Nezumi was untouchable. Nezumi was strong. Nezumi was going to make sure that they got out alive.

Now, Mikael was staring at her wide-eyed corpse.

The pink-haired boy sank to his knees before shakily crawling over to his best friend’s body.

“N-Nezumi-chan? H-hey…w-wake up. This isn’t funny anymore…”

Silence. She had to be pretending. This was all a part of her master plan. No one could hurt Nezumi. No one could catch Nezumi off-guard. Nezumi was going to save them.

He was now in her lap. The gardener pushed back her hair and used one of his sleeves to gently wipe at the blood. Blood on her scalp. Blood on her face. Blood on her glasses. Oh my god, there was so much.

“N-Nezumi…h-hey…Nezumi…”

His voice was beginning to crack. His vision was blurred by a build-up of tears. Come on. Say something. Anything.

More silence. Not even a whispered breath. Not even a faint heartbeat.

The silence was perforated by a sharp cry. The usually silent Mikael had erupted into a loud sobbing fit, clutching tightly to his friend’s chest. Who was going to console the despondent boy? Who was going to pet his hair and wipe away his tears and tell him everything was going to be all right?

If Nezumi wasn’t here to save him, who would?

[shslbobthebuilder]

Get up. Get up and stop being so useless.

Mikhail was up, but that was about all they'd accomplished- they were still pretty useless, doing nothing but staring at the bodies. What were they to do? 

Move. Investigate. Help. Speak.

A loud noise made them jump, a cry, a sound that they would have done nothing but roll their eyes at before now only making it harder for them hold back their own tears. It was a horrible, heartbreaking sound, one that bounced around the inside of their head and sounded so much louder than it really was. Their chest ached just hearing the cry, but seeing who it was making the heart-wrenching noise intensified the feeling.

Mikael. Mikael, the sweet, pink haired gardener. The very first person they'd spoken to. Innocent. Quiet. Sweet. He didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve any of this. He should have been back home by now, they promises him they would make sure he got home safe- and he was safe, sure, but here he was sobbing and clutching he corpse of someone who had actually been his friend. Mikhail hadn't even done that right, when was the last time they talked to him? Pathetic. Pathetic. Help him.

"Hey, um..."

Their weakness showed in their voice and they knew it, but they couldn't let themself stop. They had to do something. 

"Mikael...come on, she's, uh...she wouldn't want ya to...um..."

What do I say. What do I say.

"It's, uhh...it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be fine...I'm sure she's, er, in a better place..."

Is this how consolation worked? They'd never tried it before. All that came to mind was broken bits and pieces of sentences they'd heard years ago, things they never thought they'd need to repeat. Was Nezumi really in a better place? Would she really not have wanted Mikael to cry? They didn't know. They didn't know what to do at all.

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

If I'm So Numb Why Does it Still Hurt? | Open |

The shock had worn off long ago. The initial amazement of discovering someones dead body strewn throughout some miscellaneous part of the theater was beginning to grow somewhat lackluster. As the remaining students gathered together in order to examine the area and scene of the crime, Kenji felt his mind go numb with the mere thought of the impending routine. Stare at the dead bodies, examine the dead bodies, and fine whoever caused these dead bodies. He supposed that was all there was to it.

What shocked him was not the presence of them, but rather who it was he saw laying on the floor.

He sucked in a sharp breath as a flash of green hair glittered in the low light of the prop room. Strewn amongst the blood and props it was-

Her? How could it be her?

Kenji felt his legs tremble and his heart began to ache. A horrible, sideways ache that all but broke though his chest cavity and spilled his heart onto the floor like stained glass. He didn’t cry though. Why would he? What tears were there left?

"….Fuck."

Kenji bit his lip as his hands tangled into his green hair. He immediately ran out of the suddenly all-to-cramped room and did not stop running until he entered the main lobby of the theater. Without waiting or checking to see who was around him Kenji dropped onto his knees and curled within himself.

She was gone. Jeanne was-

"Fuck,fuck,fuck,fuck,fuck,FUCK!"

Kenji’s voice grew louder, sharper, and more aggressive by the minute. To anyone watching, it was clear that the boy so intent on being a hero was the one who wanted comfort the most.      

[shslbobthebuilder]

Static was all Mikhail heard, no voices, not even their own could reach their ears. They didn't even know if they were still talking, really, they just assumed from the way they thought they could feel their lips moving. Maybe they were wrong. They couldn't say they cared one way or another. But it seemed that they weren't completely unreachable in this state, as there was one thing they could hear. It pierced that veil of static, and then shattered it, bringing them back to reality, snapping them out of what had almost become a trance. It might have been quiet, a single word, but it was spoken by a familiar enough voice that they could hear it through everything. They just saw the dark green of his hair as he ran out of the room, and before they realized what they were doing, they had gotten up to follow him.

With him running, and them limping along behind, they could only follow him for so long before losing him. The only thing that made them able to find him was the screaming once it started, his voice through the otherwise silent theater. Following that sound to the theater lobby, they stopped in the doorway and stared at him, realizing just then that they really had no idea what they were supposed to say. Kenji was devastated. He was close to that absolute brat Jeanne despite him being so much better than her. They never understood why he liked her, never really saw the appeal, but that didn't mean they were completely unsympathetic to his situation. They had to help him, had to do something- no matter how much he had come to be angry with them, hate them even, they couldn't just leave him alone like this.

But once they reached him, what could they say? They approached him slowly, hoping that if they took their time something would come to mind, but thy the time they had reached him there was nothing. Their mind was blank. What were they supposed to do?

Apologize.

"Kenji..."

They were quiet, too quiet, how was he even supposed to hear them? Pathetic, speak up. Say something useful for once. Do something useful. 

They couldn't speak, couldn't say anything they wanted to. I'm sorry I hated her so much when she was alive. I'm sorry she's gone. I'm sorry I couldn't help. I'm sorry it was her instead of me. I'm sorry I couldn't be a better friend. They got to their knees beside him, putting a hand on his back, screaming at themself on the inside to speak, but could still only get out two words:

"I'm sorry..."

They could only hope it conveyed everything they felt well enough.

[shslbobthebuilder]

everyone else has meaningful titles why dont i || body discovery || open

For once in their life, or at least their time in the theater, Mikhail Kohut seemed dangerously close to crying. Hand clamped over their mouth, eyes wide open with fear, entire body shaking so hard they could barely see straight, they stood as far away from the bodies as they possibly could while keeping them in sight, simply because they just couldn't look away. Behind their hands, their mouth was wide open, but no matter how hard they tried they couldn't make a sound. Static filled their ears and tears welled in their eyes and their stomach was tied in a knot and god, could this get any worse? Could this get any worse at all? Nezumi was their ally, though maybe not their friend, at least she had been. And what were their last words to her?

"Didn't expect ya to be the person in here without a heart at all!"

So cruel, so cold, spoken in such rage and devastation that they never thought they would regret it, so why did they? Because they couldn't take it back. They couldn't take any of it back. Nor could they take a single word of what they said to Jeanne back, every horrible thing- and that's all there had been, was horrible things. Not even a brat like her deserved a death like this, or a death at all. 

"I-I'm s-"

They couldn't even choke out an apology, thought it didn't matter in the end. Not like it would do much use now. They never thought they'd want to take anything back, never thought it would cross their mind- but now, looking upon the corpses of the two girls they had spoken so harshly to in the past, they would take it all back in a heartbeat if it meant that they would come back to life. If it meant that this whole nightmare would end. And it still wasn't over, was it? These deaths couldn't even be the last, a horrible realization that dawned on them and nearly caused their tears to spill. Someone else had to die before there was even a chance of this ending, someone else had to die or else they all would.

Would that be so bad? Just end it, just end it all...I don't care about this anymore, please just end this nightmare...please, please someone just...

"Kill me..."

Quiet words, barely audible, muffled by their hands still covering their mouth. But there. Still there, still spoken.

"Why didn't anyone...kill me..."

Slowly, they sunk to the ground, pulling their knees up to their chest and wrapping their arms around them. Shaking, terrified, trying not to cry, unable to look away from the corpses of Nezumi and Jeanne. 

"Why didn't someone just kill me...?"

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

The conversation had calmed down enough to help Kenji gather his thoughts again. Rubbing his injured knuckles, he shut his eyes and took in a deep breath. His lungs constricted and burned with the sudden amount of oxygen. It seems he had forgotten to breath in his fit of anger. The cryptozoologist wasn’t too surprised. Carefully he unfurled his fist and let his hand hang limply to his side. As logic returned to his mind, so did guilt. So did sadness. Emotions he had been attempting to avoid all flooded back to him as he reached up a hand and ran it through his hair. 

"…I suppose so."

Mikhail was not wrong, as much as it burned Kenji to admit it. The lingering rings of anger still hung around specific emotions. Admitting someone else was correct was something he may or may not have had trouble doing. The hand in his hair gently tugged at a few of the stray strands. As if the tug on his scalp would help bring him back into reality. God, he knew it would take him a while to fully calm down. His heart still hurt and his brain still burned with the images of dead bodies, flashing like anagrams across the backs of his eyelids.

"…I guess I’m just used to not being able to do anything about it, ya know?"

The words were muttered quietly, bitter to their core. Kenji’s mind flashed back to his father. To everything he couldn’t do. What he wasn’t allowed to do…..The thoughts sent a new wave of anger burning through his throat as he choked on his next few words.

"So….I’m frustrated. Now what I could possibly do something I…I don’t know WHAT I should do. After this….what is there to fix?"

The world was a big place. The opportunities that arose in front of Kenji were ones he was never presented with before. Looking up at Mikhail, his red eyes screamed multiple apologies and worries to his friend. Kenji’s entire face mimicked that of a kicked puppy. A very strong, still pretty angry kicked puppy that was strong enough to leave a small dent in the wall he had previously punched. But, you know. Still a puppy. 

[shslbobthebuilder]

Even now, Mikhail still couldn't find it in them to look Kenji in the eyes. They kept their eyes focused on the ground, a glare still on their face though they weren't quite sure the anger was at Kenji anymore. They sighed, frustrated and at a loss for words, but not wanting for the moment to be left in any kind of silence. They knew that the right thing to do would be to give him an answer, any kind of answer at all, but they just couldn't think of what to say. That they knew how he felt? Of course they didn't. When was the last time they had been the one to handle something on their own? They didn't want to say anything, didn't want to somehow admit to this without even realizing what they were saying, but...

"I don't know. Maybe we can't fix anythin'."

Their voice was quiet, quieter than they were used to speaking, but it was like they hadn't even noticed.

"Maybe we're going to find Momo's killer, and they're gonna die, and then in a few days someone else will be dead, and we'll find their killer, and they're gonna die, rinse and repeat until none of us are fuckin' left. Or shit, maybe we won't catch Momo's killer, and we'll all die right here right now. Maybe thinkin' we can fix anythin' at all is useless, and we're all just a bunch of animals trapped in a cage waitin' for our inevitable slaughter. Maybe it's fate. Destiny. Some bullshit like that. Right?"

Well that all got very, very negative, and now they can't remember where they were going with it. There was a "but..." somewhere, right? There was supposed to be. Now they can't remember where or what it was. Finally, they looked up at Kenji, meeting his eyes and feeling a pang of sympathy for the boy despite how angry they had just been at him- they needed to tell him something, anything, even if they didn't quite believe it themself.

"But...we can still try. We still have to try. We can try to find a way outta here, we can...we can work together whenever that bear shows up with it's next motive and we can find a way around it, find a way to save ourselves. We can make sure nobody else around here dares to kill, we can keep everyone alive until this sadistic fuck who set it all up gets bored of watchin' us. We can win, or we can at least go out knowin' that we tried."

...Convincing enough? They sure hoped so, scattered as their thoughts must have obviously been. Their words ignited only but a small spark of hope in the back of their own mind, but they put on the most confident grin that they could in an effort to get Kenji to believe it wholeheartedly.

"C'mon, man. I don't think either of us handled this the right way. But there's plenty we can fix, plenty we can do better. Don't give up now."

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[shslcycling-blog]

… Yeah. Yeah! They were going to make it out of here alright! There’s no way they could give up yet. Everyone who died will be avenged… Hell, there’s still a chance this is all just one huge play, right? Just a fancy shmancy joke and that everyone dead was just in on it. The director probably told them or something. Everyone’s gonna get out okay! Masaaki and Mikhail are going to be the heroes here! They already had superhero names, for crying out loud! … The cyclist assumed he’d have to be the sidekick, though. But sidekicks are great too! The architect has his back and Masaaki had theirs. Who could stop them now? Not some freaky and creepy bear!

… But now he felt awkward being this close. Pulling away suddenly, Masaaki rubbed the back of his neck and bit his lower lip. That was… A tad too touchy feely. The cyclist had hugged Mikhail like they were his mom. Ugh, embarrassing. Should he apologize? He didn’t know. Once dumb as a brick, always dumb as a brick for the young man.

"Ahah, woops, sorry about that. Kind of reflex to cling when I get scared."

Oh wow, he faintly blushed. Swiftly, Masaaki tried to hide it by scratching his face with his left arm. Okay, with that aside, it was time to do hero stuff! Heroism? Heroic deeds! That sounded about right… . But the cyclist would definitely panic and probably flip out if he had to go even near Momo’s corpse. Ask Mikhail, he thinks. But then they’ll know you’re an idiot, he thinks. Fuck off thoughts.

"So what’s the first order of business for us then, bro?"

[shslbobthebuilder]

Well that all worked out pretty well. Masaaki seemed better, and Mikhail had definitely calmed down since the start of the conversation as well, their anger having subsided in the process of trying to comfort Masaaki. An unexpected distraction from their own problems, but an effective one nonetheless. And now, even with the subject being turned back to the murder at hand, Mikhail found themself strangely calm about the fact that they knew exactly what the first order of business for themself and the cyclist- investigation.

They shrugged off his apology, taking a step back of their own for his sake. Had he just blushed...? They weren't sure if they had seen that correctly, but either way they grinned even wider at him.

"Not a problem. I'm not the best with personal space myself, ya know. Now..."

They turned back in the direction they had been walking before being stopped and pointed forwards.

"Investigation time! Not at the scene of the crime, no, that's where too many people will go. I say weeee..."

Come on Mikhail, he's expecting you to be a leader, to know what you're doing. Say something to enforce that idea!

"...Walk around until we find anything suspicious?"

...Is that really the best you've got?

[at-the-bitter-end]

Headcanon meme

[Jumping on the meme train to get things started — Gem]

Put a symbol (or several) in my ask box, and I’ll give you a headcanon.  Yes.  Do it.

☾ : Sleep headcanon

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ϡ : mental state headcanon

ღ : love or sexuality headcanon

♡ : relationship with (give name or url)

† : religion headcanon

✄ : pet peeve headcanon

☂ : food headcanon

♒ : Any other question of your choosing

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[shslcycling-blog]

… Not all people were bad. That was true. But were no people bad? Mikhail just proved Masaaki wrong about that. Someone here did kill Momo, didn’t they?… But Mikhail didn’t do it, and neither did Kenji… His closest friends couldn’t have killed the tattoo artist. The architect really was the cyclist’s wall to lean on during these trying times. He couldn’t be the hero is this story. There was no one hero. Rather, there was everyone, everyone in theater trying to help each other. Mikhail was smart, right? Something Masaaki wasn’t at all. He barely knew what an alibi was when Nezumi had asked him at the time. Maybe Mikhail was really supposed to be the leader.

The cyclist’s tears had stopped quicker than last time. An emotional outburst calmed by levelheaded realism. A good balance between the two. Masaaki literally couldn’t do this without Mikhail. They’ve been helping the cyclist since the first time they’ve met. From silly adventures to… More serious things. What did Masaaki give back to them? Had he done anything in return? The cyclist felt guilty. What did he offer the architect? Was he just some kind of burden? No, don’t think about yourself like that. Something. He’d do something in return for his… best friend? Yeah. Yeah.

"… I-I wanna keep you safe too, bro… You mean a lot to me, y’know? You’ve helped me a lot, even though we… Really haven’t known each other for that long. It feels like we’ve known each other for so long…  I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. Come on, we’ve gotta be the heroes here. I promise I’m gonna help you, and everyone else here too! We can do this together!"

Masaaki… Strangely didn’t want to let go of Mikhail. It was comforting and took off some of the stress being this close. Of course, personal space was a non-existent concept to Masaaki… But even this seemed kind of close. It wasn’t bad, right though? It was totally fine… Between two bros.

"I’ve got your back, bro. We’re gonna make it out of here. I promise."

[shslbobthebuilder]

Grateful for the fact that Masaaki's tears stopped easier than previous times, even though Mikhail still really had no idea what they had done, their smile grew as they listened to the cyclist's words. As annoying as all that emotion could be, there were times where it could be endearing, in a sense, like in this instance where he was saying such kind things to Mikhail. They could appreciate that. They didn't think they needed it (although deep down, they really did), but they appreciated it, and as dense as Masaaki could be he really was trying. 

His quick change in attitude was at least something that Mikhail appreciated, not even noticing how close the two still were.

"Now there's the spirit! Don't ya worry about me, I know how to hold my own- I'll be safe, I swear. Nothin's gonna be able to take me down! And I've got your back too, not gonna let anythin' bad happen to ya either! Ya better believe we're gonna make it out of here!"

Now they took notice of how close the two still were to each other, and though they weren't sure why Masaaki had yet to pull away, it didn't bother them enough to do it themself.

"We can definitely be heroes, bro. We can be the greatest heroes this place could ever fuckin' see."

[engineofdestruction]

What Pokémon can you see my muse becoming?

Bonus points if you explain why!

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

Kenji bared his teeth and took a small step back. He eyed the taller student angrily. His blood was still boiling, but he had left the burner on for too long. His mind could no longer distinguish between his logic and his anger. As Mikhail yelled back with equal vigor Kenji could not find words.

He had never been good at words to begin with. His emotions were better expressed through immediate action and gestures devoid of personal space. Words could not process properly in this state of mind. Words that should have made sense when spoken by his friend only served to make him angrier. How would they be able to do anything? No one had known this had been happening. 

Kenji raised his fist up and brought it back. Oh he wanted to do it. He wanted to do it so bad. Sending his shaking fist flying into Mikhail’s face seemed like the only way to curb his rage. Gritting his teeth, Kenji held the position for a few moments, as if he really was going to punch one of his best friends with all the force he could manage. 

Instead he turned to the nearest wall, one of the sides to the make-up room the two had previously exited, and slammed his fist into it. The slamming noise echoed through the entire area and the bone’s in Kenji’s hand began to ache badly. He did not move from the position for a small amount of time, giving his now burning first a few moments to relax. The single act of assault towards the wall assisted in clearing up his mind just a little bit. Just enough for him to peer over at Mikhail with a sharp frown.

"What would you do, then?"

His words were soft and hoarse, as if he strained his throat. Peeling away his fist from the wall, Kenji remained firmly in his spot.

"If we’re all so stupid for letting people die…what should we do about it? Do you have any ideas? Any ways to stop people from murdering one another? If you want to be a leader and come up with some brilliant idea then PLEASE tell the rest of us what you have in mind because…b-because…."

Kenji put his fist back on the wall, softer this time, and used it for a little support as he looked down at the floor.

"Because sometimes all I can think about is….if you…or Masaaki…if something happens to either of you I….I don’t want that to happen.."

[shslbobthebuilder]

A raised fist, a furious expression, a sight that Mikhail had become all too familiar with in their seventeen years of life, but rarely this close, rarely happening to them. They were usually safe by now, pulled away from danger and thrown to the ground while someone else handled things, watching from the sidelines, not actually getting hit. All of their anger evaporated in seconds, replaced quickly with fear as their mind raced to find a way out of this and they tried to desperately scramble out of his grasp- only to have him quickly turn and hit the wall behind him. Mikhail took advantage of the opportunity they had to get away from him, taking a good couple of steps back just in case he decided to try to hit them again, but didn't flee like they so desperately wanted to. What sort of person would that prove them to be?

What would you do, then?

A valid question, and Mikhail knew it. What would they have done? They couldn't say. They didn't know what they could have done, they didn't even know what they really meant in saying that. Things they said in anger didn't often have explanations, at least not ones easy to find even for them, so they were silent for a moment while they listened to Kenji and asked themself- what would they have done?

"Hell, I don't know."

When they finally spoke, it was all they could say, averting their eyes from Kenji and simply glaring down at the ground.

"I don't know what I would do Kenji, fuck, is there anythin' at all that coulda been done? Can't ya just let me believe that there is, so I don't have to think this is some kinda fucked up destiny that we're all meant to be fulfillin'?"

They took a single, cautious step closer to him, hesitant to get too close, but not wanting to stand too far away either.

"I...I get what ya mean, man. I don't wanna see either of ya end up like that either. I don't want anyone to end up like that at all. I just...don't want to think that there's nothin' that coulda been done...that we really didn't have a chance but to just let this happen..."

Another step, still refusing to look at Kenji, trying hard not to let their voice waver.

"So there has to be somethin' we can do. There has to be. We can fix things, right? After this? We have to be able to fix somethin'."

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[shslcycling-blog]

Masaaki needed somebody.

He was about ready to fall down. Momo was actually dead, and someone had actually killed her. Someone else was going to die just like Shinji did. He needed somebody to lean on for a bit. Just to straighten out his thoughts one more time. The cyclist couldn’t- and didn’t want to fall back into that gaping abyss of despair and dread. He was crying, fumbling around as he ran from the fountain trying to find different pieces of evidence. He needed to stop, have a breather in order to stop the risk of an attack. Across the room, he stumbled and leaned against the wall. Panicking and shaking his knees, he couldn’t help but start crying again. What was left?

Out of the corner of his eyes, Masaaki spotted Mikhail walking out of the room. They looked calmer than they did at the first body. Was the architect expecting this to happen? Maybe. Mikhail was a calmer and more level headed person compared to the cyclist. Smarter, older, more admirable. They were the true hero compared to himself. And people need their heroes. Quickly, he ran over to Mikhail and stopped right in front of them, heels digging into the floor with a squeak. He stiffled his sobs.

"… M… Mikhail-kun…"

"… I’m scared bro… Someone else is going to die… I-i can’t deal with this anymore bro… Everyone here is still a good person, right? Bro, I need you right now… You’re the smarter one… I-I can’t do it alone, man… I-I… I-I…"

Masaaki reached over and hugged Mikhail with a large force and hugged them tightly. Pressing his forehead against theirs, he softly sobbed as he choked it out.

"I-I love you, bro. I can’t do this without you."

[shslbobthebuilder]

This...was also not at all what they expected.

Of course, at first the only thing on their mind was something along the lines of Oh god, not again...Even after all they'd been through, they still couldn't stand to be near people this emotional and vulnerable, they still hated to see and hear people cry. And the fact that Masaaki was so close as well, standing in front of them, preventing them from moving on, it...definitely didn't help them feel any less annoyed. And they weren't really in the mood for taking part in this conversation right now, comforting anyone, helping, they had one clear goal in mind, and that goal was to make sure they were safe by making sure this killer was caught. And they were about to tell Masaaki exactly that, when out of nowhere they found themself being hugged and...

Today just got weirder and weirder, didn't it?

Now it wasn't that Mikhail had absolutely no sympathy for the cyclist at all, that wasn't the case. They had too much sympathy for him, they understood his feelings much, much more than they wanted to admit. His fear, his weakness, the fact that he was by no means strong or brave no matter how hard he tried...that was exactly the sort of thing that Mikhail tried to ignore about themself. So what were they supposed to do when faced with a situation where not only were those feelings completely unable to be ignored, but standing right in front of them in the form of another person? 

Hesitantly, they wrapped their arms around him in a way that they could only hope was comforting. They didn't have any experience with this sort of thing. Fuck, they didn't have any experience with anything, and here was Masaaki treating them like some kind of savior. It tended nicely to their ego, and they were happy to let him keep believing that lie, but it had been hard enough for them to accept that they weren't the kind of person they thought they were. What were they supposed to do when he found out?

He wasn't going to find out. That was the only solution. As far as Masaaki was concerned, Mikhail had to be the strongest person in the theater. And that was that.

"Uh...hey, c'mon man, don't cry, don't...oh, forget it...look, I don't want to lie to a."

Really, they didn't. They didn't want to feed him any kind of sugar-coated story just so that he'd shut up. If they were going to try to comfort him, they weren't going to bullshit their way through it. They looked him in the eyes, trying to seem as confident in their words as they possibly could.

"Not everyone here is a good person. That much is obvious. Kyo wasn't a good person. Shinji tried to be a good person. Yuudai is kind of a dick, but he hasn't tried to kill anyone yet so I guess ya don't have a reason to be afraid of him. My point is, there is someone else among us who is bad. Maybe even more than one person. But that person isn't you. And that person isn't me. I'm like, eighty percent sure that person isn't Kenji, and I also doubt that it could be Mikael, and Nezumi and I are allies so she's gotta be alright, so that's like, five people ya know are good...but now I'm getting off topic."

A small, encouraging grin, hoping that their words were having some kind of impact.

"We aren't bad people, and that's what matters. We're good people who have each other to lean on, and as long as we have that, I promise that at the very least, we'll be safe. I'll make sure ya stay safe, Bunny. And if ya need me, I'll be here."

...Had that been convincing enough? Because they had no idea where they were going with their words of comfort.

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

[ultimatecryptozoologist-deactiv]

Kenji watched as students moved. Some stared on in surprise while others shook themselves out of it enough to begin a proper investigation. His shoulder still stung but he preferred to ignore it. The bruise would not last long if he took proper care of it. Emotions Kenji had thought he buried deep away before he went on this field trip began to resurface. Mixtures of empathy and fear bubbled and swirled deep within his heart. It pumped his veins full of something that made him feel anxious. It riled him up.

This person is dead. Of course he felt bad. Despite his best attempts to only care about himself the boy’s natural empathy bubbled into view and he could only wince angrily at a few of the student’s choice reactions on the matter. Some did not care. Why should they? Momo wasn’t anyone they knew well. The thought stung the back of Kenji’s head and he clenched one of his fists tightly.

It was Mikhail’s comment that drove him off the edge.

Without thinking about it, Kenji swiftly moved after his friend. He grabbed on to the architect’s wrist before planting his feet firmly in place. Kenji’s grip grew tighter and tighter as his eyes burned. His entire body felt hot as he barked angrily over at the other adventure crew member.

"J…Just because we care about someone dying…just because we’re surprised….makes us dumbasses?"

Kenji stepped even closer to Mikhail, his small form overwhelmed by his large spirit as he snapped out angry spitfires of words he didn’t even now he could say.

"Don’t you care!? This girl had a family! She had people who cared about her! People who are worrying about her and wonder when she’ll come home? But now the answer is NEVER. She’s DEAD. How would you feel if someone you cared about just left one day and never came back!? You wait and wait and wait for them and then one day people come and tell you that thEY DIED!?"

Hot tears began pricking Kenji’s face once again. As he yelled he stood on the tips of his toes and brought his face dangerously close to Mikhail’s. The shorter boy’s body oozed anger and, perhaps, the slightest flecks of despair. 

[shslbobthebuilder]

Kenji. Their friend. Someone who they had thought was alright, someone who they had been completely content hanging out with minutes before, was now grabbing them and yelling in their face? Personal space may not have been something they respected most of the time, nor was it something of their own that they cared very much about, but when they were being grabbed they saw that as a challenge. And when faced with a challenge completely out of nowhere, thinking this might result in some kind of physical conflict, they did what they always did and looked over their shoulder to notify Daryna that things were way out of their control.

But of course, she wasn't there.

Of course, she wasn't there. Because Mikhail was all alone now, all alone in a situation that they didn't know how to handle, a situation that like always, they had put themself in by being unable to control what they said.

And of course, just like any of the other rare occasions that they found themself in this kind of situation, they didn't fight back. Instead, they stood completely still, narrowing their eyes down at the shorter boy who dared to be screaming at Mikhail like this over a few words spoken in the heat of the moment, and did what they did best: made things worse for themself, their voice eerily calm as they began.

"I'm not sayin' you're not allowed to care. I'm not sayin' that at all. Jumpin' to conclusions is a dangerous habit, bro."

That calm quality was gone quick, and as they kept talking their voice got louder and louder, more and more furious.

 "I was just sayin' that you're a buncha dumbasses for lettin' this happen. For lettin' someone else die, for not lookin' for a better way out than this, for being a helpless fuckin' bystander who might as well have just watched that girl die! Think I give a single shit how sad any of ya are? Think I care that you're cryin'? Think again! I'm pissed off that someone is dead too! I didn't want it to be this way! This whole situation is fuckin' tragic Kenji, I get it, everything sucks and people are dyin' left and right, but fuck, I can't say a single goddamn word without ya takin' it the wrong way and blowin' up in my face!"

[shslbobthebuilder]

animorphs

[shslbobthebuilder]

OH NOmo | open | murder reaction

This was not at all how Mikhail expected things to go.

This was supposed to be fun. Masaaki taking the Adventure Crew off to do something fun, Mikhail reluctantly leaving their room after figuring that it would be a good way to take their mind off of the motive- to not worry so much about Daryna, because really, she can handle herself, right?

Though there was always that worry...the wheel could land on Mikhail again, and if Monokuma was seriously killing people now, just like it had supposedly done to Jeanne's mother...she was strong but she wasn't invincible, oh how could they live with themself if they knew that she was gone-?

Of course. So Mikhail went along with the others to the costume department, and for a while, they were actually able to distract themself from the doom that was constantly hanging over their head. Although they were a bit wary of Jeanne with how...strange she seemed to be acting in light of her mother apparently dying, they were managing to have a good time with everyone, completely forgetting that they had anything to worry about at all. In the changing room, they grinned as they looked at the cool stuff they had found- really, this place would have been much better off as a store than it was as a slaughterhouse or a theater. But just as they had begun to put on the trenchcoat they'd found, they heard a terrible noise, one that they recognized all too well despite having only heard it once before...

But even as they stared down at Momo's body in the makeup room, even as it dawned on them that someone else was dead, and she wasn't even going to be the last, even as they stared right down at the corpse of yet another person who had once been their peer and they hadn't even known the name of, there was a feeling in them that they couldn't deny.

Relief.

Daryna was safe. The wheel wasn't going to spin anymore. There had been only one casualty, and it wasn't anyone that Mikhail cared about, so really there was no point in counting it at all. Someone was dead, but in the grand scheme of things, did it matter? Did it really matter? Not to Mikhail. They were numb, unable to to hide anymore the fact that they were terrified. They could still push it down, yes, they could refrain from screaming aloud, but could they lie to themself any longer? As hard as they tried, there wasn't a point. They were afraid, and the fact that they were afraid only made them angry, which was the only thing that they were going to show to anyone.

They weren't going to waste another moment standing here staring at her. There was a bigger picture to focus on, one that involved their life, not the life of someone it was already too late to save. Casting a single disdainful look around the shocked onlookers, they shook their head as they turned and walked out of the room to get a head start on investigation.

"Can't say I'm fuckin' surprised. Dumbasses."