- callmesumi- @shushubishh - Tumblr Blog

kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it

shushubishh

Fr fr

hangsawoman

me when i go walking on sunny days and end up on a tree lined street and look up at the gaps of sunlight and miss you more than anything

#oh love

you scrolling on Tumblr baby?

Nopee insta ehe

pretentious-piece-of-shit

new childhood trauma unlocked!

my father smoking in the only one bathroom we used to have, me having to hold my breath every time because I felt like if I inhale it, it's gonna kill me

also me begging him to stop smoking, me just asking continuously why why why why do you have to smoke why are you killing yourself slowly, he'd say you won't understand, I have stress. I didn't understand. all I knew is I'm watching my father slowly kill himself in front of me

shushubishh

You're not dramatic baby, I can totally relate to you. My whole life i thought my father was the most genuine, honest and the best person on the earth. I used to boast about how his driving skills are so goated. How everything he did was so fascinating. I feel like there were times when some people jokingly told me that my father smokes so much. I was like that's the biggest lie and joke you could ever make. But one day I was looking for my father everywhere and suddenly my heart broke. I saw him doing the thing I used to defend him with a friend of him. I hated the fact the people smoke i hated those people and now seeing my father becoming one of them was wrenching my heart.

So i totally get you love. I wish they would at least try to stop it , for us...

pretentious-piece-of-shit

new childhood trauma unlocked!

my father smoking in the only one bathroom we used to have, me having to hold my breath every time because I felt like if I inhale it, it's gonna kill me

also me begging him to stop smoking, me just asking continuously why why why why do you have to smoke why are you killing yourself slowly, he'd say you won't understand, I have stress. I didn't understand. all I knew is I'm watching my father slowly kill himself in front of me

shushubishh

You're not dramatic baby, I can totally relate to you. My whole life i thought my father was the most genuine, honest and the best person on the earth. I used to boast about how his driving skills are so goated. How everything he did was so fascinating. I feel like there were times when some people jokingly told me that my father smokes so much. I was like that's the biggest lie and joke you could ever make. But one day I was looking for my father everywhere and suddenly my heart broke. I saw him doing the thing I used to defend him with a friend of him. I hated the fact the people smoke i hated those people and now seeing my father becoming one of them was wrenching my heart.

So i totally get you love. I wish they would at least try to stop it , for us...

pretentious-piece-of-shit

please let me sing my throat hurts whywhyyyyy

shushubishh

Oh baby , you'll be able to sing sooooon

pretentious-piece-of-shit

I feel such a morbid gust of nostalgia, everything seems to be falling apart,

I had one foot out the door since I was 12, I was so ready, always so ready, always eager to leave it all behind, I waited, so patiently waited for the years to pass, last year was supposed to be it, but someone more important turned up, and now I have to put my foot out the door again and this time around it's suddenly so much harder,

so so much harder, the four walls of my room, all my messy things, everything bearing down my shoulders and I can't push it off

my parents who I've hated, I cry seeing them getting older, I cry seeing them sitting alone, I cry when they look at me like I'm their whole world and I cry when they look like they know their world will fall apart soon, I cry because they know, I cry because they're hiding it, I cry because they're not very good at hiding, that has always been my thing

I miss my 12 year old self, I wish I could hug her tight, I'm sorry I'm failing you, I'm sorry you had to wait for so long and I'm sorry I can't

shushubishh

You're not failing her, she's proud of you for surviving all these years. She knows too, it was hard, you still survived those years. She can see you through your eyes. She's happy that she finally got loved by your parents through you.

She's still inside you love. Ready to be free. Just give her the right environment, she'll flourish like she never did.

#you're still loved by her #myloveᡣ𐭩