Dreams Die @silver-fox-demon - Tumblr Blog

Yearning

I was someone's soul to dance with mine. Turns out alot of people don't know how to dance.

For A Night

It was something I wanted but am scared to have. I'm just someone who wants to be loved.

Today feels painfully empty, and I'm angery.

The Heart On The Wall

Every day I see you but I can't find you

I wouldn't believe in love if you didn't exist.

I don't know who I am and no one is coming to save me.

I'm pushing others away from me. I'm getting use to being alone. I'm not sure if it's a good thing but it's better then constantly getting disappointed. I don't know why I'm here or what will happen next.

They say the person who loves wins. I never cared about winning but it gave me something to think about. I have always had a big heart and most of the times it has gotten me in situations that have almost destroyed me. Still this hasn't changed, no matter how hard I try. I feel like I care about others more then I do myself. I crave love from this broken world of people.I feel so disconnected from others and Im scared that I'm going to die alone.

My Best Friend

Growing up I never thought I would have someone to call my best friend. I was always told no one would like me for who I was because I was different. For a long time I always thought maybe that was for the best until I met you, that's when everything changed. I remember that first hello, it made me so happy at the time because no one talks to the weird new kid. I remember the happy times and the smiles that made the years go by even when it got hard for us both. You have seen me at my weakest and have stuck by my side through the years. You were the person who never gave up on me. You gave me a chance when no one else did and even though I was broken you still cared for me. You made me see the world in a whole new light and it's not as dark as it used to be. I hope I make this dark world a little brighter for you as well. I might not be able to save the day but I will always be here when the days get hard.

#always and forever

#Our Adventures

Hurt

I have said this over and over again but I really do wish that I was normal. I don't know if I should blame the people in my passed life from all the trauma they have caused me. I only wonder who I would be as a person if I was treated nicely. I often find myself crying a tear or two just thinking about all the horrible things that have happened to me. Sometimes I scream from the top of my lungs asking why did they treat me this way? I remember a time in my life where I felt nothing but empty and would do anything just to feel again. I remember crying myself to sleep alone feeling like no one would care if I died. Some days I still feel like ending my life but I’m still fighting. I’m in pain and sometimes I have no idea what to do. I have cried so much that its now hard for me to let these feelings out. I feel like everything I love to do just has faded away. I feel like I’m always running away from something. I'm hurting and I don't know if I can fix myself, where do I even start?

Happy

Most of the time i feel scared, I overthink and I worry about everything. I feel like sometimes we are always expected to be happy but I’m not always happy. I understand that happiness is just a temporary feeling. Everything is temporary but I feel like there is a hole inside of me and I don't know how to fix it. In my journey in life i have had some horrible experiences but they made me who I am today. I have two amazing people in my life that almost make me feel whole, but i still feel empty some days. I often wonder if its because I'm broken, you see I'm not the same as everyone else. Some days i will scream and cry wishing that i was normal. Wishing that I wasn't damaged by the people who have broken me in my pass. I wonder what it would be like if I was happy all the time but in order to be happy we have to be sad. I might be broken and i might be scared but I'm ready to heal myself. I'm ready to find the things that make me feel happy again.

Moving on

In the past it was hard for me to let go. I always worried that that people I loved would soon leave me one by one. Turns out my fears came true and the more I lost, the more I had to be alone. While I was alone I wondered why I'm still alive if I have nothing left to fight for? That's the moment I started fighting for myself. I'm not a perfect person and our bodies are a body of work. I want to better myself and my life for myself. Now this doesn't mean I don't want friends but I can't make anyone stay. Let go of all the pain and choose the life you want to live. To my friends who are still by my side, I love you. To the friends who were in my past, thank for the memories.

Goodbye

Have you ever lost something you cared about? How did it make you feel? Did you try everything in your power to stop that outcome from happening? Some days I go back to the place where my memories turn into my deepest fears and I think to myself...what if I went back in time? What would happen if I did everything right and fixed all the problems in life. Would I be happy? I feel like I'm order to be happy we have to take pain that comes in life. We cannot control people or the world around us but we can try to become a better version of ourselves that we want to be. I'm not perfect and there are a lot of things I regret in my past but I'm forever growing. I just hope the people around me can see that.

Normal

What's wrong with me, I feel like I'm not normal. I'm so used to being abused and let down that is the normal for me. The people who try to get close to me I push away. The only people I let in my life are the ones who fuck me and leave. When I'm all alone staring into my dark room with my thoughts I can't help to wonder what's wrong with me....why am I like this. Did you hurt me this bad? Fuck you

Hurt

Sometimes when I close my eyes I think of all the pain you caused me. I remember a time when someone hurt and broke you. I picked you up and lifted you to the sky but you dropped me. You broke me just like she broke you. Are you happy now? Now it's my turn. Let me break your heart, who's ready?

Pain

I don't believe in love anymore. Right now I think love is just a feeling just like being happy is a feeling. Feelings pass, time goes on and you don't always feel that feeling anymore. I used to think that true love was really out there. I used to think that one day Id find someone who would actually love me the same waybI love them. But I can't love anyone anymore. It hurts too much.

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