me too. × one shot for @alexxstandall03!.. again
you’re lucky i love u.. welcome to your tape
second one shot, i mean. 😂😘
NOTES: This one shot is pure fiction. Don’t get butthurt.
AGES: Jade - 16 Alex - 17 Justin - 17 (not sure about justin’s but in this story he is seventeen)
Jade is a fictional character. What she is experiencing is not what @alexxstandall03 is experiencing.
“You sure you don’t want me to come over or something? You seem like you need some company.” I told Alex on the phone.
Alex Standall is my childhood bestfriend who is living with his father, a policeman. His life is on the low right now, and I fear that I might be the only one keeping him alive. Because of the death of Hannah Baker, Alex has been affected deeply and has been coping with depression.
But the thing is, I also have feelings for him. I love him, but he just doesn’t know yet. And I’m scared that he won’t like me back, and our friendship would be broken because of a single mistake I made.
“No, it’s okay. I’m fine here, Jade. You don’t have to worry about me,” Alex consoles me, his voice as soft as butter. “You sure, okay? Well, I need to do some homework but call me if you need anything.”
I was about to hang up the phone when Alex says something. “Oh, and Jade? Thank you. For everything you have done for me, for being my best friend. And I want you to know that whatever happens, I appreciate you.” Alex was crying. I know by his voice that he was. The way his voice breaks, the way that he talks..
“Alex, what happened? Alex, talk to me. Are you okay-” Then, by that moment, he hangs up.
I have never felt that scared for him my entire life.
I sent dozens of messages, calling him multiple times, but he never answered. The dread became stronger than ever, so I decided to sleep it off. I had nightmares that night. They were about me and Alex.
I was crying, and I was telling Alex that I loved him, and that I would do anything for him and be there whenever he needed me. Then he said, “Why didn’t you say this to me when I was alive?”
I woke up with a jolt. And, with my phone ringing. I thought it was Alex, but it wasn’t. It was actually the principal of our school. Why? Why is he calling me?
“Hello. Is this Jade Foley, Alex Standall’s friend?“ My eyes widened. If he is talking about me in this way, does it mean that something bad happened to Alex? Oh god, no.
“Yes it is, sir. What happened? Is everything alright? Is Alex okay?” I held onto my favorite blanket. Please, I hope that nothing’s wrong.
I heard him take a deep breath before answering me.
“Alex Standall.. shot himself in the head last night.”
I immediately hung up. Then I felt everything.. everything went black. I felt like I couldn’t hear anyone, and that I couldn’t see anyone. The wave of tears overcame me, one by one, leading me ecstatic. I couldn’t breathe.
“Jade, are you ready yet? We need to go-” Justin, my brother, stopped in his tracks. “Jade?! Fuck, Jade! What happened? Jade, tell me!” Justin dropped his bag, ran to my side and rubbed my back, like he does whenever I have a panic attack.
I try to speak, but I only mumble words. “Alex.. shot himself.. last night..” By doing this, I cried even more. I couldn’t feel anything.
“Shit. Who told you that?! Jade, just breathe. In and out. Inhale and exhale. Oh god, do I need to call mom?” I shake my head aggressively, sending a roar of pain in my head.
“Fucking hell, I’ll give you water. Okay? I want you to calm down, and don’t you dare do anything stupid. Just remember that I love you, and I’m here for you. Alright? I’ll be back real quick,” He says, and runs down the stairway, to give me water.
Whenever I have panic attacks, I just focus on my breathing. I lie down, and follow what Justin told me to do. Soon, I felt my heart beat slower and I could breathe again.
I hear Justin come back up, coming to my side, holding a glass of water. I drink the water. “There. You look better now. So, can you explain to me what happened?”
I sigh. “The principal called up and told me that.. that Alex.. that Alex shot himself, in the head, last night.” Justin fell silent. I knew that he and Alex were close friends.
“I-I can’t believe it. Why would he? Did Hannah’s fucking tapes affect him that much?” I started to cry again, silently.
Justin held my hand. “Are you alright? Do you want to be absent?” I nod my head. I couldn’t face everyone at school; I wouldn’t focus.
“Well I’ll be absent with you then. If you want, later this afternoon we can visit him at the hospital. You down?” I smile. My brother really knows how to make me happy.
“We would like to visit Alex Standall? He got shot in the head and was submitted here for critical condition.” I say to the nurse at the front desk, Justin right beside me. “Alright. Immediate family? Girlfriend? Or friends?” Justin spoke up. “We’re Alex’s best friends.”
The nurse sighed. “Mr. Standall is in very critical condition and his family wants only immediate family to visit him right now. We will inform you for any updates but I have to follow directions.” I looked down. That was too bad. I was really looking forward to seeing him, which may be the last time.
I was about to leave when Justin said, “No, wait! Is there any exception for a girlfriend, perhaps? Jade is Alex’s girlfriend and well, it would crush Alex’s heart if he couldn’t be able to hear her voice one last time, even if it is in the unconsciousness.” I widened my eyes. What is Justin doing?
“Well, I guess I could make an exception for a girlfriend. But only the girlfriend. The other one needs to stay in the waiting area.” The nurse said, with a very stern look. Justin held my hands. “Don’t worry about me. I"ll just wait here. You go and see Alex before it’s too late.” I smiled. I probably have the best brother ever.
Justin sat down on one of the chairs, while I was being led by the nurse. We went to the third floor, and walked onto a white long hallway. I felt like I was being tortured by the amount of white I was seeing. Finally, we stopped in front of a white door with the number 312. “Mr. Standall is here. He is currently unconscious, so I highly suggest you do nothing that will wake him.” She reprimands me, then walks away.
I take a deep breath, and open the door. Inside was a room with an equal amount of color as the hallway, with a particularly white bed. This hospital seriously has issues.
I see Alex, lying down on the bed, with a series of wires and cables hooked up to him like a machine. There was a white gauze wrapped around his forehead, from where the bullet was shot. Seeing him in this vulnerable and near-death state made me feel horrible. It reminded me that I wasn’t there to save him, that I tried, but it wasn’t enough. The tears started flowing like a waterfall.
I sat down right beside him on the small spot of the bed, and made a mess of his hair. Usually he hated it when I do this, but I felt like this would be the last time so I did it anyway.
“Oh, Alex.. Why would you do such a thing? Have I failed to save you?” I mutter. “You know Alex, I love you,“ I chuckle as I say this. I can’t believe I’m doing this right now but hey, he won’t be hearing me anyway.
“Yeah, I do. Not love as a friend way, or platonically. But like, as a girlfriend loves a boyfriend. The type of love that’s clićhe as fuck, where I dream of a future with you and I want to kiss you and all that. I love you in that way.”
“When did it start? I think it started when we were young, and we were playing in this playground together and for some reason I fell off the swing and hit my hands on some metal, and it started bleeding. You wiped my hands with your shirt and you kissed them, and I knew that I started to feel something for you, even though we were only ten and I didn’t know what that feeling was. I knew that you were special.”
I started crying again. “But I think you don’t feel the same way, because I tried, Alex. I knew there was something wrong with you, how whenever I tell you my stupid and lame jokes you don’t laugh at them like you used to. So I tried to be there for you, but I didn’t try enough. and now here you are, and I.. I was too scared to love you. I was scared of rejection, that you wouldn’t love me back, and that was wrong. I shouldn’t have been afraid. Because I may have been the last person to make you alive again, but I.. I didn’t tell you that I loved you.” A single tear dropped onto Alex’s cheek and went to his lip. I wiped his lip, and it was so soft.
I had no idea what happened to me, because then I started leaning down, and I kissed him. I kissed him with all of the sadness I felt for him, how he might be dead or alive tomorrow. I didn’t care. I kissed him with all the love I had for him, and all the regret of not telling him sooner.
I was walking to the door, wiping my face. When I heard him.
My mouth opened wide. What the hell? I faced to my back, and there he was, eyes opened, staring at me. I haven’t smiled that much at that moment. I practically ran to his side and hugged him, and he hugged me back.
Then he pulled my face and kissed me, and I felt wonderful. We kissed for what seemed like days. I have always dreamt of kissing him, and now that it’s happening, I’m so happy.
“Jade. You’re so beautiful. And I love you, too. It’s not your fault that I tried to kill myself, nor is it that you didn’t do enough. At that moment, I forgot about all the people who cared for me, and focused on the negative. I’m so lucky that I’m alive today, because I can see your beautiful face again.” He says, kissing my forehead.
“Wait.. you heard me? I thought you were unconscious?” He laughed, which brought butterflies to my stomach. “I was actually awake. I awoke just before you came, actually. And you came in and I wanted to see what you’ll do if I was asleep, and I don’t regret what I did.”
I laugh. I love this boy so much. “Oh, before you call the doctor. Will you be my girlfriend?”
I kiss him again, closing my eyes. “Yes, Alex. I will be your girlfriend.”
I started brushing the hair of my daughter, Jordan Standall, for it was her first day of school at Grade 1. “Ow, mom! Careful!” I chuckle. Jordan is so cute when she’s mad.
“Mom, when did you and Dad get married?” “Me and your father got married four years after we started dating, when I was twenty and your father was twenty one. Why, darling?” Jordan smiled at me with this big, toothy smile. “I was just curious.”
After I took care of Jordan, we went down where my husband, Alex, was reading a newspaper. He saw us and stood up to kiss us in the cheek. “Jordan! Are you excited?” She smiled. “Yes, Dad! Very much! I’ll go to the school bus now. Bye Mom, bye Dad!” We wave her a goodbye. When the door closes, Alex sighs.
“I’m so happy I’m alive today. Or I wouldn’t be able to witness the future of having a family with you, Jade.” Alex says, holding my hand. “Me too, Alex.
I hope this makes up for the long wait! It turned out better than I expected! 😊
TO OTHER READERS: If you have a 13 reasons why or a riverdale oneshot request, just dm me the details. who are the people you want, what is the story, and is it fluff or angst and how much fluff/angst? accepting smut. go on, my message box is open!
TO OTHER READERS: i also accept edits! any character in any series or books or movies! or even real people. just tell me what the name is the character is, and what kind of edit you want (examples in my profile). then i’ll provide you the other needed information.
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