Winter

"My heart beats to the rhythm of my blue fire, Lead me on beyond the cold white horizon, Into the mountains to run with my wolves." || Ice has a magic, can't be controlled.

[skadigoddess-blog]

( ares-warlord-of-nothing )

“I’ve never had it mixed but I’d try anything to make the taste better. I don’t understand how this is so well enjoyed. Though perhaps it is meant to prevent people from drinking too much?”

     “Well I don’t particularly know the names of them, but I’m fond of the colorful drinks that they put those funky umbrellas on. Those seem to be the most pleasant for my taste buds. I’m quite perplexed by the popularity as well, maybe it’s our age?” The winter goddess joked lightly with small smile. “But then again, once they’re inebriated enough doesn’t it seem tastier?”

[skadigoddess-blog]

( ares-warlord-of-nothing )

Ares tilted his still full glass in front of him, observing it. “I can never understand how people enjoy alcohol. It tastes like piss and makes me dizzy.”

     The winter goddess chuckled as she too looked down at the vile drink. “I said the same thing to my step-son not too long ago. But I have a theory- they balance this sour taste with ice cream!” Skadi answered back at the stranger. 

[skadigoddess-blog]

( lymskr )

Good. 

They said nothing as she walked away from them, watching silently instead; a habit they had yet to kick.. though its presence was, perhaps, for the best, considering their current situation.

Had Loki been a better man.. 

        perhaps an apology would         have been in the cards. 

Alas, they were not. They never had been, according to most, but goodness and evil were two sides of the same coin; a coin Lóðurr had tossed into the nearest fountain the day he became Loki.

End.

[skadigoddess-blog]

( venebalder )

Pain was pervasive … and it didn’t differentiate between those who were undeserving with regards to feeling the sting of it - a sting that was often proven too quick and too precise for its target to evade it with any success - and those who weren’t. And Skadi would always fall under the latter category. Clenching his jaw when he saw the helplessness in the icy blue of her gaze, exposing her vulnerability for the world ( or at least the bar where they currently stood, watching such devastating events unfold ) to see - should they choose to look closely at her face - Balder wanted to curse the wardens for orchestrating an event that had succeeded in bringing tears to the eyes of a woman whom he’d always considered to be the strongest woman he knew, apart from his mother. And still, they’d managed to reduce her to this state. 

Damn them. 

Well aware of how much the goddess of winter would absolutely despise allowing utter strangers a peek at her vulnerable side, he calmly moved his hand from her shoulder to the slender curve of her neck, threading his fingers through several thick, silky strands of her luxurious, white-blonde hair in his own attempt at comforting her. “Then don’t,” he murmured, so softly that the noise of the crowd all but buried the sound, turning the mere idea of eavesdropping into an impossible feat. “You needn’t force yourself to bear witness to their cruelty.” As if to prove his point, he determinedly held her gaze, an intensely piercing, direct stare that would hopefully keep her own ensorcelled so as not to allow herself to be drawn into their vicious, unjust games. 

And yet it was he who risked enthrallment - for the longer he stared into her eyes ( beautiful eyes that could stop a man dead in his tracks if she was of a mind to ), the stronger his desire grew … to enfold her in his arms and never let her go. It was then that Herakles’s words tumbled through his mind - words of encouragement; advice that urged him to lay bare his very soul and pray it didn’t suffer the painful shock of rejection. Cowardice was a difficult enemy to conquer, after all. 

But when she laid her head on his shoulder, the warm weight of it a familiar comfort, Balder’s restraint shattered. His arms closed around her as he pressed his cheek against the crown of her head, breathing in the invigorating scent of winter wafting from her skin - a sweet aroma - while at the same time revelling in the sensation of having her in his arms again. “Your pain is your own … Don’t give them the satisfaction of a public show.” Directed not so much toward the bar as a whole but toward the ones responsible for launching this spectacle in the first place. “You’re not alone, Skadi,” he whispered against her hair. “Cry if you need to. Scream if you must … Or just embrace silence. Whatever you decide, I’ll be here to protect your privacy.” 

I love you. 

If only he had the courage to say those three, precious words aloud. 

Not yet, Herakles - but soon.

     His hand touched the unclothed skin of her neck which sent blue fire to sear her veins. Skadi was scared, even petrified, in being this close to Balder. Fears constantly clouded her mind, what if they teared him away from her again? What if in the next maze they caught him? What if they hurt him? She could not take anymore pain, any more heartbreak. That was why she was a bit hesitant towards him, even though she was slowly revealing her layers, her fears held her from her giving everything away in one peel. But when he touched her in such a manner, when his tender warm flesh connected with her colder one, it was difficult to remember the difference between up from down. The goddess closed her eyes relishing in the sensations and leaned further into it, she daydreamed of a different place, of a different time, of a different scenario. Where they weren’t in a bar witnessing the devastation of friends and most importantly, of her step-son. 

     His voice snapped her eyes open once again, her icy blue hues connecting with his much softer ones. The intensity in them was enough for a person to drown themselves in them, and Skadi was without a lifesaver. She looked deep in them, trying the read the emotions they held inside. Something akin to passion made her cold heart skip, but she couldn’t let herself be fooled into such manner. It was her own passion she saw reflected in his, a mere trick of her imagination playing tricks on her once again. Right? She was no longer sure. “I won’t.” The goddess answered, her voice as soft as his. There were a storm of emotions brewing up inside her, confusion was the strongest. The emotions she saw, he couldn’t...? 

Did he?

     For the briefest of seconds, she let her mind wander over to her daydream land again as her gaze moved downward towards his lips. They were close enough, she could smell his natural scent, an odor she had failed to forget. But then again, she hadn’t been aiming to forget it. It would have taken her just a simple centimeter, a mere inch, for their lips to connect and merge in a way only in her wildest dreams happened. What would happen if she did make the push? If she crossed that invisible line between friendship and something beyond that. Would he react? Would he pull away? She couldn’t risk it, not yet. Especially when other situations demanded her full attention. With extreme difficulty she let her gaze raise to his eyes once again, hoping he didn’t notice her resolve cracking the smallest bit. 

     Once she was wrapped in his arms, Skadi gave a contented sigh, feeling all the tension release from her body. Balder was the only one who held the power to do just that. It was going to take a whole army for her to tear herself away from him. “Thank you, Bal. For everything.” There were no other words she could utter to him, for she was speechless. Well, there were. But she wasn’t sure if he was ready to hear them, and if she were honest to herself...Skadi wasn’t sure if she was ready to say them. So she settled on thanking him again, and again, her voice just a small whisper. 

[gamoraaasquill-deactivated20190]

How lucky you are…

[skadigoddess-blog]

( lymskr )

She was cold, aye, frost a crown for the goddess of winter, but they still took a step closer, then another, until they loomed over her – though intimidation wasn’t their intended game, so much as anger pulling them close, whether they wanted to heed its call or not.

Finally, some emotion – and yet they were too far gone in their own anger to truly celebrate their low-brow victory, their voice taking on a dangerous, calm edge as they spoke. 

“Do you think I beg forgiveness?”

Had they been kinder, more like who they’d once been.. her offer would have been appreciated for what it was. Instead, the years had taken what was already twisted and then snapped it further, and all that was left was the being that stared her down, ignoring the warning of the cold that bit at them as they got closer to her. In Loki’s eyes, cruel had never been a word apt for Skadi.. but for the trickster themself, it certainly applied. Better to be the villain they wanted, than the chained thing they sought.

“Banished to Helheim, and still, there are worse fates.” Another step, her clouds of breath close enough to touch without having to reach. She could slap them, if she so wished, but Loki continued, light long-gone from their eyes. Their next words were an upturned snarl, their smile as cold as her cloak of ice. “Do you think I even once considered mercy for Odin’s brood, after what he wreaked on mine?” This is for the best, they told themself. Let her cast her blame, paint me selfish, self-serving, evil & cruel; twisted beyond all recognition.

It was easier, that way, for all.

    She didn’t flinch nor back down as they walked closer. Perhaps it was the deadness in their eyes that made her heart ache with regret, but it was all washed out at their words. They had the same look Balder carried, but the being before her was the very reason he even had it in the first place. 

    Disappointment twisted her stomach in knots, here she was apologizing again. Why should she? Skadi was a goddess in her own right, not only had Loki killed the only man she had ever loved but they had participated in the murder of her father. Their hands were stained with the blood of her family. And not once had they apologized for their wrongdoings, so why should she? 

    “No. You do not.” The question, she guessed, was rhetorical but the answer still came forth from her frosted lips. Her anger cooled away and in its place was resignation. What good would it do to fight someone who wouldn’t give up on their ideals? She had said her piece and she had expressed her feelings. More than that, Skadi made herself vulnerable to this killer. And what did that get her? Nothing. This was pointless. 

    So with a final pitiful look, the goddess shook her head, and turned around. “You’re not worth it, Loki.” Walking away from a lost friend wasn’t painless, but they had made it easy to do so. She was the goddess of hunting and battle, and she knew when a fight was worthless. 

[skadigoddess-blog]

( threadsofxfate )

urdr smiles softly. “ you’re RIGHT. i am tired of being a TOY for them. thank you, skadi. “

    Skadi felt her icy heart grow colder at the gratefulness from the other, it always delighted her to be of help. “Anytime, my dear. And if you need anything else, don’t be afraid to call me.”

[skadigoddess-blog]

( lymskr )

“You offer up apology without due cause?

     –– The least you could offer up is all of it.” 

There it was – their tongue was sharp, words like knives, and gaze worse yet. Years in the cavern had not given them respite and wisdom; no, it had given them pain and fury, a bitterness that their very soul was steeped in.

It wasn’t Skadi who ought to bear the brunt of Loki’s anger, but she was the first to apologize.. and perhaps one of the few who hurt the most.

    At their sharp edged words, Skadi immediately tensed up, the gloves that protected her hands freezing up slowly as she tried to regain control of her emotions. They met their stare with an icy one of her own, her eyes as piercing as icicles. Winter was never merciful when tempered with. “At least I offered one! I don’t see anyone else lining up to do the same!”

    “The least you could do is accept it.” The goddess shot back at them, with colorless clouds forming at her every exhale. 

[skadigoddess-blog]

( venebalder )

Not surprised in the least to hear such words pass her lips - words that exemplified the depth of strength she carried in that deceptively delicate form; words that represented a fearful mother who only wished to protect her children - Balder allowed his dark blue gaze to linger on her features, tracing the beautiful, smooth lines of her face as though in search of something … something only she could give. “I know, Skadi,” he murmured empathetically, well aware of just how far she was willing to go for her loved ones; she’d assisted in Loki’s punishment, after all; a fact that the deceased had enjoyed regaling him with, seeking only to comfort him through any mention of the woman who would forever hold his heart in the dainty palms of her hands. “I am sorry for Freyr’s involvement in the maze,” he started to say, genuine in not only his heartfelt apology but in the intense, compassionate look he leveled upon her. “But I’m relieved you weren’t drawn into their games.” An understatement. There were simply no words to describe this indescribable feeling; so strong was this feeling that his heart could potentially burst free of his chest cavity, his thundering pulse eliciting a sensation of lightheadedness. 

When he cupped her shoulder, fingers lightly curling around the gentle slope, the impulsive gesture propagated from his need to touch her - to demonstrate his determination to be that shoulder for her to lean on should this televised … event prove too much for her - Balder hadn’t expected for her to start so violently that he felt it, the familiar sting of chill seeping into his skin from the place where he so willingly and exultantly touched her. She’d always been one to worry over hurting him, afraid the cold that lived deep within her - like a living, breathing entity - would attack bare flesh as soon as it made contact with her own. A useless concern, for pain was the one thing her touch would never beget. If anything, the sharp needles that pricked and pierced his skin in quick succession reminded him that he was very much alive and that Skadi, the goddess of winter, was part of his world again; the better part. After all, there were only a few individuals in this universe whom he loved unconditionally. “I couldn’t agree more,” he whispered, refusing to remove his hand from her shoulder even upon realizing that that was what she wanted. If it had been because she wanted naught to do with him, then he would have obeyed her wordless demand without question. 

But not for her baseless concerns. 

Never that. 

“Perhaps luck will be on our side, and it will end soon.” Uttered in a quiet, hopeful tone.

    She couldn’t continue to do such damage to herself, she would rather have someone tell her what happened than have to watch it for herself. The pain struck her too deep, and the tears stung too strongly. Skadi looked over at Balder trying not to ponder too much onto his words, was he relieved because a dear friend was unharmed or because his feelings ran beyond that of friendship? Shame washed over her, her step-son was on a maze having to deal with his innermost demons, and here she was thinking about only herself. She shook her head, white unbound strands swaying around. “I-I can’t Balder. I can’t keep watching this.” Icy hues locked with his darker ones, her expression showing how helpless she felt, how unguided she was. The winter goddess always had a purpose, a path of sorts, but she had no plan, no solution. What was she to do?

    Skadi felt, rather than saw, how unaffected he was towards her cold, and as much as it pained her to admit it, she needed comfort. Her body twisted in direction towards him as she buried her face into his shoulder, taking a deep inhale at the familiar scent that clung to him. The goddess had always been too proud to admit that she didn’t need to lean on anyone, she was the deity of winter. She drifted upon the land to change the whole ecosystem without any assistance. But when it came to matters of the heart, she ached for the all the support. “Yes, maybe it will. But you’ll have to tell me when it ends, because I can’t bear to keep watching this.” The confession came more easily, she was starting to get comfortable with showing her more vulnerable side to Balder. “I have reached my breaking point and I refuse to look another second into that bloody machine.” Plus she would rather break down in the confinements of her house, than in a bar with strangers looking at her with mixtures of pity and glee. “Such vile vultures.” Muttered she unconsciously, it seemed such events were bringing out her much sharper side. The plane she only bared on the battlefield. 

[skadigoddess-blog]

( venebalder )

It had been too long since he’d last enjoyed a bit of freedom at the hands of the one he’d never forgotten - even after she’d departed for her own home, newly married; her visage regal but with a hint of sadness only he’d possessed the intuitiveness to notice, an intuitiveness that had expanded and flourished from the countless years he’d spent in her company, quite exceptional at noting the various nuances of her emotional state ( rather than taking what was shown to the world at face value; he’d known better, of course, known how skillful she was at feigning contentment when she felt anything but. ) And now that they’d reunited, something within his chest unfurled - a painfully tight something that had wound its way through skin and tissue to burrow into his heart, sinking onto his chest like a stone.

And before long, Balder found himself caught up in the beauty of the scenery, having taken a much-needed moment to not only let it sink in but to breathe in the fresh, crisp air. It was beautiful and soothing in the way the tightness in his shoulders relaxed, as though a certain weight had been lifted as soon as the cobalt blue of his eyes lit upon the brilliant blue expanse of sky - extending from the top point of the mountains to stretch across the mildly calm ocean, nary a cloud in sight. Perhaps he’d done himself a disservice by holing up inside a relatively small house tucked away from sight, a good hours walk away from the bustling, tiresome activity of town. But whenever he’d considered venturing outside, instant denial would arise, and he would simply chalk it up to a basic human need for companionship. Naturally, a god’s own experiences differed greatly from theirs, but given what the mortals had accomplished by constraining them to an island meant to subjugate them, maybe even turn them against one another, he couldn’t write it off as impossible, especially not with everything that had occurred as of late.

But that was neither here nor there.

With Skadi’s unexpected but welcome return - for all he knew, they’d resided on the island together for years without ever crossing paths - it was almost as though he’d been given a second chance, and it was his choice on whether he should accept it or not. As of this very moment, however, he was leaning more toward nei than ja. “That’s good,” Balder responded with a faint, heartfelt smile, the muscles of his cheeks twitching from general underuse; it was growing harder and harder to pretend that everything was fine when he still awoke late at night from a light dozing, besieged by phantom pain, his chest throbbing in nightmare-esque remembrance. Would he ever truly recover from his death? Doubtful. Alive though he appeared to be, there were times in which he believed himself to be living only half an existence, and not the better half. “Not good that your marriage has ended, but good that you’ve remained good friends to this day.” Njord’s temperament had allowed for him to view him in a far more positive light than he had others in his pantheon - and despite the depth of the love he carried for Skadi, he’d been … relieved? was relieved the correct term? … when Njord had been chosen. Dejected and glum as well, for he knew their late-night forays into the forest - and the conversations, both serious and silly, they would engage in - would come to an end with her marriage. “Is it possible that he managed to evade the mortals?” The former god of light had yet to lay eyes on the rest of his pantheon, having only recently become reacquainted with a few; therefore, it was only natural to assume some had possibly escaped - and Njord … He could be among them.

At Skadi’s request, Balder blinked, slightly taken aback, looking from her face - and the sweet, dazzling smile that had formed upon her lips - to the small, beautifully elegant hand she’d extended toward him. Dance with me. Denial was on the tip of his tongue … and yet … and yet he couldn’t help but reach for her hand, his fingers closing around hers gingerly, the chill emanating from her skin a familiar and nostalgic sensation. And then, ever so gently, he drew her to him, where he then proceeded to wrap an arm around her waist, his hold light ( as though giving her time to pull away if she so desired. ) “I haven’t danced in so long,” he whispered, rather sheepishly; he’d had little cause to dance, seeing as it was an action that was usually generated from one’s love of life or utilized in a celebratory fashion. But for Skadi, he could give it - and her - a whirl. “So I shall apologize in advance - for all the times I will undoubtedly step on your toes.”

    “Anything is possible I suppose.” Answered she in reply to his theory on Njord’s current status. But Skadi knew him better than most, could practically think like him if she put enough motivation. “But even if he did, I’d think he would eventually let himself be caught.” Even if it meant misery was upon him on the island, the sea god would still turn himself over. He would have considered it a selfish act to be the only non-suffering individual while the rest of his pantheon, and not to mention his children, were imprisoned. Njord’s selflessness was what eventually made her heart love him dearly. It wasn’t as intense as what she felt towards Balder, but nothing would ever compare. Their relationship had been slow building, the winter goddess hadn’t even noticed she was head over heels in love with him, she denied it as much as she could because after all, what would he ever see in her? 

    She watched nervously as he registered her request, regret washed over her, it had been a silly idea. Skadi should just take it easy, it was probably hard for him to adjust to this new living life-a warm hand enclosed on hers, immediately shutting off her worries. It took a lot of self-restraint to not bask in the heat that emanated from his embrace. She wanted to press her cheek desperately to his chest, to hear the reassuring thump thump, that meant something was beating inside him, that he wasn’t a figment of her imagination. If she was truthful with herself, Skadi had dealt with mirages of him in her life. There were times she was alone in her bedroom, and shadows would move in her peripheral vision. And she would turn to the source, sword in hand, ready for battle, but then it’ll be him. An image completely constructed from the depths of her lonely imagination, but Skadi wanted so badly to believe it was really him that for the smallest of seconds, she let herself feel what it would have been like for her deepest desires to come forth. 

    Happiness. It was about damn time she got a sheer piece of it. The goddess knew her earlier problems stemmed from the fact she was used to holding herself back. Whether it be from her cold, or as a preservation technique, or just plain terrified of peeling her layers off. But if seeking what she wanted meant thawing herself out, then she was willing to sacrifice it. The thought that most scared her was, would her efforts be fruitful or pushed away? 

                                         Only one way to find out. 

    “No need to apologize, my love. We’ll both get the swing of it after a few seconds, some things are never forgotten.” Her voice was as soft as the winter winds on a chilly night. Skadi placed her other hand on his shoulder and started moving to silent music. She thought of an ancient song they used to both love when they were younger, paired with her double edged words, the goddess was melting bit by bit. She hummed the familiar tune as they danced along the forrest floor, her grin big enough to cause snow to fall around them. “I missed this. I missed you.” Winter confessed softly as she finally moved herself to the place where she desperately wanted to be since she laid eyes on him. Having been shrunk down from her original height made it easier for her to move her head sideways towards his chest as her ear connected with muscle. She closed her eyes as she enjoyed the sound of his heartbeat. Bare yourself, Skadi could almost hear the encouraging words not only from her ex-husband but from her step-daughter. “There were times when I was in Thrymheim wandering the halls, trying to make myself busy because if not, well, grief would have won.” It was an unusual feeling, an unknown one, she felt as she started stripping herself emotionally. Her words were painful but truthful, she wasn’t expecting anything in exchange. She was simply doing what she should have done centuries ago. “I would be walking and suddenly, I would be hit by the smell of sunshine. Of you. And it was so real that I had to stop and look around to see if you truly were around...but of course, you never were.” Skadi pressed her eyes tightly, she would not break down in front of him, he was the one that deserved comfort not her. She swallowed thickly as the next words tumbled out. “There were so many things I wanted to say to you. It’s curious how the same day they broke the news to me, I was heading to your house to confess some things. It almost seemed as the Norns were playing an awful joke on me, I seem to always have bad timing.”

    Feet stopped their dancing as she leaned away from him to place a gloved palm against the curve of his cheek. “I admit that after your death, I did some running. I hid, I secluded, I shut myself down. But I’m not running away now.” Her other palm, that was twined with his, gave a gentle squeeze before releasing it, now it was free to be placed on the other side of his face. Skadi held him caged in between her palms, where she could look at him directly in the eyes as she continued her speech. “I want to help you with what you’re going through. I can see it in your eyes, Balder. Let me help you.”

[skadigoddess-blog]

( phallic-freyr )

He felt immediately uncomfortable. Freyr wasn’t even close to being proud of himself, let alone felt like he had became a man. He was a womanizing adulterer. It might have worked for that Zeus fellow, but not for him. Nah, Freyr was a fuckboy and he was well aware of it. “Well you’re sweet, I appreciate that,” the god offered warmly, the best he could. “You’re a hell of a goddess, Skadi.”

  “Oh look at us being all sappy, my own fault I suppose.” Skadi suddenly said in jest, waving a dismissive hand at his compliment. “Okay, so I’ve official had beer and ice cream. Is there another thing I should try? I’m feeling rebellious.” Playful, was more like it. But after all they’ve been through these moments of lightheartedness was what they needed. 

[gael-garcia]

[skadigoddess-blog]

brigid--of--fire:

@skadigoddess

[boomboxmusicfun]

Visit Original Link

[skadigoddess-blog]

I'm not running away, I'm not running away, I will feel the pain and stay. I'm not running again, I'm not running again, Even though I'm scared, baby. And I won't freeze you out, Like I have been. I won't freeze you out, I'm gonna let you in. And I won't freeze you out, Like I have been. I won't freeze you out, My heart is melting.

@venebalder

[skadigoddess-blog]

( phallic-freyr )

“Oh come on Skadi, my sister and I are a headache and you know it,” he teased, letting her touch his cheek without a flinch. The god had genuinely only wanted the best for his mother, stepmother. “Father was a bit of a prick, let’s be honest,” his voice responded in a whisper before he choked on his drink, laughing heartily. “Too much information, mom. Dear Odin, don’t you have any decency?”

  “Never to me, love.” Skadi answered back at him lovingly even when she knew he was being playful towards her. She let the comment about his father slide, knowing their rocky relationship. The goddess’ cheeks frosted greatly and she stuttered helplessly trying to reword her words. “Don’t tease me, you know I didn’t mean like that.” She leaned her chin on her palm as she watched him silently before suddenly saying. “You know I’m very proud of you and the man you’ve become, Freyr.”

[skadigoddess-blog]

( valfreya )

“Goddess of love,” Freyja said, winking once at her fellow åsynje, and keeping her follow-up sentence – ‘among other things’ – to herself. “It comes with the territory.”

She raised an amused brow at Skadi’s mention of the sweater, a friendly grin appearing on her face as she spoke. “Nonsense. I’ll simply grow a third.” It was good, she thought, to lighten the mood, to change the subject some. She didn’t want Skadi to drown in what ailed her. “I’m certain you’ll get better with time.”

  Skadi simply rolled her crystal eyes at her daughter’s words. The next pair made her laugh gleefully. “I think it will be quite comical to see you with three arms. You’ll be an even greater warrior. The three handed battle goddess, I can see it now.” She playfully jested with her. “Oh I don’t know, I think irony is having too much fun with me. The goddess of winter not being able to knit, the travesty!” 

[skadigoddess-blog]

( bragi-nxrse )

     “No, no apologize needed…the order down here is different, Skadi. Besides we all have been succumbed by this island and it’s ways.” though for a brief second the thoughts of his conversation early, the urgency of being in the ‘now’ quickly caused himself to ease up. “I think all we can do is wait, which I think is the only punishment the mortals wanted from us…” since in the end if all the gods were anything, it was their loyalty to family. Though wanting to bring comfort to his fellow Aesir, he looked down at her with a soft smile. “Would you like to get something to eat with me? If we are going to watch this, best not do it on an empty stomach.” 

  The winter goddess felt a bit relieved at his words but, “Still- we’ll have to make up for our time away.” It was the only was Skadi would feel better about being so reclusive. Her tendencies of pushing people away from her, only increased when they were imprisoned on the island. “I was never good at being patient, only impulsive. I guess, there’s always a start, right?” The rhetorical question hanged in the air before she answered his request with a happy grin that seemed more genuine than her previous ones. “That would be splendid, Bragi, thank you.”

[skadigoddess-blog]

Mourn Me [ hahahahahaha #noregrets ]

Leave a “Mourn Me” in my ask, and I’ll write a drabble about my character mourning your character’s death.

[OOC: Put under because of length. Warning! Triggers below! Death and complete heartbreak, so prepare thyself.]

Unbuttoning her winter coat with confident fingers Skadi took a deep breath of the winter chill that surrounded her mountains. She was finally home, and what joy did it bring her. The goddess was about to dive in further into the path that lead to her home when a voice stopped her. “Darling, I’m afraid I’m stopping here.” Icy blue gaze looked back towards her husband friend Njord as he looked up at her with a sad smile. It pained her to know the reason behind his denial was because it hurt him to go up to a home where too many memories laid. But she understood it, so with a heavy nod she walked closer to him and tried not to spill the tears that were on her eyes. Because even though she wasn’t in love with the sea god, she still loved him deeply, and to part with such an important figure in her life was devastating. “I’ll have none of that, come on we promised each other a happy farewell.” Skadi chuckled at his words and composed herself for him. “I’ll miss you, my kind Njord.” Taking his much weathered hands into her own, she pressed a gentle kiss to them. “Take care of yourself and please stay in touch. Let the twins know I’ll miss them terribly.” He gave her a nod and squeezed her hands tenderly. “Promise me something. Tell him how you feel.” It took her some time to process the words in its entirely and by the time she did, Njord was already on his way back to his ship.

It didn’t take a master genius to know what, or in this case, who he was talking about. Skadi turned around and proceeded to walk the steep path to her castle. Years had passed since she’d seen Balder, the goddess wasn’t even sure if he would recognize her. Of course she was lying to herself, the two had too much history between them for them to forget one another. Before, she had been too afraid of his reaction to express her true feelings to him, too scared of his reply to spill everything she had been holding up inside since the day they had met. Then the death of her father happened and in a twist of fate she had promised herself to Njord. Skadi will always remember their painful goodbye and it had shattered her so completely, she didn’t think anything else would affect her as deeply as that moment.

Njord’s words circled through her mind teasingly, taunting her to do such as he said. But she didn’t know if she had the courage to perform such act. Just then she heard the distant sound of running paws and she smiled fondly. Her wolves came running towards her in energetic happiness, they jumped all around her in spirited movements making her giggle. She took her time in caring for each one of them, before she trudged on with her wolf entourage following her.

Would she or wouldn’t she? The question followed her through the entrance of her home. Skadi looked around her ice castle pleased by the way her friends had kept it intact. One of them made their way over to her slowly and hesitantly. “Asta, what’s the matter dear? I’m finally home, come give me a proper hug.” But Asta stayed a few feet away from her with a stricken expression on their face, her stomach filled with dread. “What’s the matter? What happened?” There was a tension in the air, making not only her but also the wolves fidget nervously. It was the same feeling she got before they delivered the news of her father’s death. “It’s Balder…he’s dead.” The sentence seemed to hang in the air for a brief silence before Skadi shook her head in denial. “But that’s impossible, surely you must be mistaken.” But there was no mistaking the complete devastation in Asta’s gaze, and the immense pity. Without another word the winter goddess left her home and walked aimlessly through the woods. There was no pain, no anger, no frustration, nothing. She walked numbly for hours until her body collapsed in the snow in exhaustion, she let the coldness be her comfort. Her wolves howled in unison, their cries filled pain and sorrow.

It was tough to determine how much time Skadi spent buried in the snow, hours?, days?, weeks? But she had gotten herself out when the preposition of exacting a cruel revenge was offered.

After betraying and chaining her friend, she wandered through the same snowy terrain. It seemed that with the dark act, his death seemed more real. Memories flashed rapidly across her vision, whispered words drifted to her ears, innocent caresses appeared on her skin like a mirage. Skadi reached a hand out to hold onto a tree, as she grew breathless with the overflowing emotions running through her. Her lips quivered before the ice crystals started falling from her eyes without any intent of stopping. She slumped to the ground once her legs lost the strength in holding her up. Her body convulsed with heavy sobs as a quivering hand rose to her chest. She was curious to see if her heart was still beating after the reason for its existence was dead. But it was useless, her cavity felt empty, she felt empty. There was no more light, no more reason, no more love. No more Balder. Harsh winds whipped around her as Skadi lost control of her powers and let out a cry that shook the entire mountain.

                                                      How was she ever going to survive this?