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@sleepbin98-archive-blog1
important
This account keeps being jank, so I’ve had to move it to an older account. Still the same username and everything. To make it easier on you all, I’ll just follow everyone who has already followed me here. Any sentence starters I’ve gotten within the past day, I’ll be sending you one from the new account to -- again -- make things easier for you.
sherlock starters ( season one episode two.)
“ the more a tea-pot is used, the more beautiful it becomes.”
“ four hundred years old. they’re letting you use it to make yourself a brew.”
“ some things aren’t supposed to sit behind a glass. they’re made to be touched.”
“ sometimes you have to look hard at something to see it’s value.”
“ i don’t suppose, um… i mean… i don’t suppose that you… you want to have a drink?”
“ you wouldn’t like me all that much.”
“ can i maybe decide that for myself?”
“ i can’t. i’m sorry. please stop asking.”
“ could you maybe keep your voice down?”
“ yes, all right! i’ve got it!”
“ you took your time.”
“ yeah, i didn’t get the shopping.”
“ what? why not?”
“ because i had a row in a shop with a chip and pin machine.”
“ you… you had a row with a machine?”
“ sort of. it sat there and i shouted abuse.”
“ have you got cash?”
“ you could always go yourself, you know? you’ve been sitting there all morning, you haven’t even moved since i left.”
“ not interested.”
“ i sent them a message.”
“ don’t worry about me, i can manage.”
“ is that my computer?”
“ what, and you couldn’t be bothered to get up?”
“ it’s password protected.”
“ took me less than a minute to guess yours. not exactly fort knox.”
“ you need to get a job.”
“ listen, um… if you’d be able to lend me some… are you listening?”
“ hiya buddy. how long has it been, __ years since i last clapped eyes on you?”
“ you need anything? coffee? water?”
“ right… you’re doing that thing.”
“ it’s not a trick.”
“ how could you tell? you’re gonna tell me there’s a stain on my tie from some special kind of ketchup you can only buy in manhattan. or it was the mud on my shoes.”
“ now, i’m glad you could make it over without a break-in.”
“ someone broke in late last night.”
“ well, that’s where this gets really interesting.”
“ find it, and we’ll pay you. five figures.”
“ i don’t need an incentive.”
“ you said that just to irritate him/her.”
“ so you think we should sniff around here for a bit longer?”
“ got all i need to know already, thanks.”
“ they’ll lead us to the person who sent it?”
“ so what do we do now? sit here and wait for him/her to come back?”
“ nobody ever does that.”
“ hi, um… i live in the flat just below you. i don’t think we’ve met.”
“ no, well i just moved in.”
“ actually, i… just locked my keys in my flat.”
“ yeah, and can i use your balcony?”
“ you okay?”
“ yeah, any time you feel like letting me in.”
“ thanks, i’ll take your word for it.”
“ problem?”
“ i’m not desperate to root around some bloke’s dirty underwear.”
“ oh, good, you follow.”
“ yeah, i know who you are. and i’d prefer it if you didn’t tamper with ___”
“ yes, it does seem the only explanation of all the facts.”
“ wrong, it’s one possible explanation of some other facts.”
“ you’ve got a solution that you like, but you’re choosing to ignore anything that you see that doesn’t comply with it.”
“ amazing you didn’t notice, all you had to do is look around this flat.”
“ good, you’re finally asking the right questions.”
“ he’s left trying to sort of cut his hair with a fork, which of course could never be done.”
“ it was a threat, that’s what the graffiti meant.”
“ i don’t think this can wait. sorry.”
“ lost five million a single morning, made it all back a week later.”
“ i hired you to do a job. don’t get sidetracked.”
“ you’re a bit overqualified.”
“ i said could you pass me a pen? about an hour ago.”
“ didn’t notice i’ve gone out, then.”
“ this ___ might move a bit quicker if you were to take my words as gospel.”
“ you are not serious… like spider-man?”
“ why did they die?”
“ where are we headed?”
“ i need to ask some advice.”
“ what? sorry?”
“ you heard me perfectly, i’m not saying it again.”
“ i’ve got two minutes before a community support officer comes around that corner.”
“ can we do this while i’m working?”
“ what about the symbols, do you recognize them?”
“ not sure it’s a proper language.”
“ what, this is what you’ve got to go on?”
“ are you going to help me or not?”
“ no. no, wait, wait - it was not me who painted that, i was just holding this for…”
“ bit of an enthusiast, are we?”
“ you’ve been a while.”
“ yeah, well, you know how it is. custody sergeants don’t really like to be hurried, do they? just formalities. fingerprints. charge sheets, and i’ve got to be in magistrate’s court on tuesday.”
“ me, in court, on tuesday! they’re giving me an ASBO!.”
“ can you print me out a copy?”
“ what about the day s/he died, can you tell me where s/he was?”
“ your friend… he’s an arrogant sod.”
“ whatever you say, I’m behind you one hundred percent.”
“ how can you tell?”
“ you want a lucky cat?”
“ but why did they die? i mean, it doesn’t make any sense.”
“ remind me, when was the last time that it rained?”
“ do you leave your windows open when you go on holiday.”
“ do you think maybe you could let me in this time?”
“ can you not keep doing this, please?”
“ somebody’s been in here before me!”
“ what are you saying?”
“ i’m wasting my breath.”
“ any time you want to include me.”
[mockingly] “ no, i’m ___ and i always work alone because no-one else can compete with my MASSIVE INTELLECT!”
“ the, uh, milk’s gone off and the washing’s starting to smell. somebody left here in a hurry three days ago.”
“ you’ve gone all croaky. are you getting a cold?”
“ found something you’ll like.”
“ tuesday morning, all you’ve gotta do is turn up and say the bag was yours..”
“ forget about your court date.”
“ if you want to hide a tree, then a forest is the best place to do it, wouldn’t you say? people would just walk straight past, not knowing, unable to decipher the message..”
“ if we’re going to decipher this code, we’re gonna need to look for more evidence.”
“ answer your phone! i’ve been calling you! i’ve found it..”
“ i don’t understand. it-it was here … ten minutes ago. i saw it..”
“ somebody doesn’t want me to see it.”
“ hey, ___, what are you doing?”
“ shh, ___, concentrate. i need you to concentrate. close your eyes.”
“ no, what? why? why? what are you doing?!”
“ i need you to maximize your visual memory. try to picture what you saw. can you picture it?”
“ how much can you remember?”
“ well, don’t worry!”
“ because the average human memory on visual matters is only 62% accurate.”
“ yeah, well, don’t worry, i remember all of it.”
“ yeah, or at least i WOULD if i could get to my pockets! i took a photograph…”
“ god, i need to sleep.”
“ fancy a biscuit with that?”
“ centuries old. don’t wanna break that.”
“ you’ve been clever to avoid him/her so far.”
“ who is s/he? have you met him/her before?”
“ careful! some of those skulls are over two hundred thousand years old, have a bit of respect!”
“ how many murders is it gonna take before you start believing that this maniac’s out there?”
“ what are you thinking? pork or the pasta?”
“ oh, it’s you!”
“ i’d stick with the pasta. don’t wanna be doing roast pork. not if you’re slicing up cadavers.”
“ don’t eat while i’m working. digesting slows me down.”
“ you’ve… changed your hair.”
“ no, it’s good. it, um, suits you better this way.”
“ do you mind if we have a look at them?”
“ what do you want?”
“ we’re still no closer to finding them.”
“ wrong. we’ve got almost all we need to know.”
“ are we collecting for charity?”
“ anything else i can do? to assist you, i mean.”
“ some silence right now would be marvelous.”
“ i’m sorry to keep you waiting.”
“ this is taking ages.”
“ what’s the point of making an appointment if they can’t even stick to it?”
“ um. what’s going on?”
“ i’m sorry, that’s not very professional.”
“ so, um. what were you doing to keep you up so late?”
“ i need to get some air. we’re going out tonight.”
“ actually, i’ve, er, got a date. it’s where two people who like each other go out and have fun.”
“ that’s what i was suggesting.”
“ oh, dull. boring. predictable. why don’t you try this?”
“ thanks, but i don’t come to you for dating advice.”
“ it’s years since anyone took me to the circus.”
“ a friend recommended it to me.”
“ you couldn’t let me have just one night off?”
“ come on, ___, behave!”
“ i need your help.”
“ i do have a couple of other things in mind this evening!”
“ you are kidding.”
“ what’s so important?”
“ you said circus. this is not a circus. look at the size of this crowd. this is… art.”
“ did you see that?”
“ come on! let’s go!”
“ you don’t know?”
“ i’ve done everything you asked. ___, s/he seems to think your advice is worth something.”
“ please tell me i’ll have something to show for it. other than a massive bill for overtime.”
“ well, i think perhaps i should leave you to it.”
“ no, no, you don’t have to go. you can stay.”
“ yes, it would be better to study if you left now.”
“ is it just me or is anyone else starving?”
“ so this is what you do. you ___ for a living.”
“ what are these squiggles?”
“ oh, right! yeah, well, of course i should’ve known that!”
“ i’ve done punch and a bowel of nibbles.”
“ ___, you’re a saint!”
“ oh, we must’ve been staring right at it!”
“ um, shall we get a takeaway?”
“ do you have it?”
“ forgive me if i do not take your word for it.”
“ yes, that’s not actually mine. s/he lent that to me.”
“ i realize what this looks like, but i’m not him/her.”
“ what? did i really say that?”
“ i s’ppose there’s no use in me trying to persuade you i was doing an impression.”
“ if i wanted to kill you, i would’ve done it by now.”
“ i don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“ please. please, listen to me.”
“ i’m not… i’m not ___. you have to believe me.”
“ i haven’t found whatever it is you’re looking for.”
“ i don’t believe you.”
“ you should, you know.”
“ how would you describe me, ___? resourceful? dynamic? enigmatic?”
“ that’s a semi-automatic. if you fire it, the bullet will travel at over a thousand meters per second.”
“ if you miss, the bullet will ricochet. could hit anyone. might even bounce off the tunnel and hit you.”
“ it’s all right. you’re gonna be all right. it’s over, now. it’s over.”
“ i go where you point me.”
“ hang on; a hairpin worth nine million pounds?”
“ i will not reveal your identity.”
today is the day i turn into a chicken. call me jinny little flaps my arms
He scoffed with amusement at her antics, barely able to withhold his chuckles. “Jinny Little. That’s not too bad of a name, regardless of if you’re a chicken or not. But since we’re being animals, I want to be Tony the Tiger. See what I did there? Tony the Uber driver tiger. I’ll be making the big bucks now with that advertizing.”
prkjnny replied to your post: buy me chicken juseyong
chicken is life. i love chicken, yes i do ~ i love chicken, how about you ~ CHICCCCCCKEN GOOOD
“Excuse me, where is your chaperone, Chicken Little?”
TONY-NIM, PICK ME UP PLS
“Unfortunately, my Big Wheel is in the shop. I chipped the plastic trying to do tricks off the curb. So you’ll have to settle for a piggyback ride via a deformed plushie.”
AYO, TONY
“Ayo, Adrian.”
buy me chicken juseyong
“Didn’t you bring three portions over the other day? Why do you eat so much chicken?,” he questioned jokingly. “You’ll turn into one some day if you keep this up. How about some beef instead?”
moonbutt-nim
Past experiences told him he would need to prepare for an influx of requests and jokes the moment he heard her calling out to him. With a warm smile, he welcomed her presence with a curious, “Hm? What is it, Jinbooty?”
follow & reblog
text message starters, part 1/?
[MSG]: If you come home and see an ambulance outside, don’t worry. I’ve got it all under control.
[MSG:] One time I thought I was heterosexual.
[MSG:] I’M WEARING A FLAG.
[MSG:] Just get in the fucking blanket fort.
[MSG:] I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I pass out for 3 days.
[MSG:] I am going places. Maybe not college, but places…
[MSG:] I don’t think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
[MSG:] THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESN’T EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
[MSG:] We’re making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
[MSG:] Can you pick me up? The threeway turned into a twoway while I sit here alone in the corner…
[MSG:] Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
[MSG:] You know, my friends think I make these stories up…
[MSG:] I’m bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We’re plotting your demise.
[MSG:] My cute new neighbor has a cast on his leg. How sad is it that my first thought was, “Hey! This one can’t run away!”.
[MSG:] OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still…
[MSG:] I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
[MSG:] I just walked into the room at this party and someone shouted “dibs!”
[MSG:] He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
[MSG:] Uh, I almost got the bride to go down on me. I’m the smoothest maid of honor ever.
[MSG:] Somehow a ride to Walgreens turned into a threesome.
[MSG:] Yeah, don’t like to call her my roommate. Too cordial. I prefer to call her “the whore that was assigned to live with me.”
[MSG:] Why does every bad decision I make end up with at least 100 likes on YouTube?
[MSG:] I feel like I don’t show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time.
[MSG:] I told you not to buy lube from a tourist shop!
[MSG:] He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
[MSG:] STOP BREAKING THE LAW, ASSHOLE.
[MSG:] There were containers of weed in the piñata.
[MSG:] So far today I’ve had six shots of tequila, one joint, I’ve hit three parties, made out with two people and been chased by security. It is spring break.
[MSG:] OMG SOMEONE JUST CRASHED THIS LECTURE SCREAMING “TROOOOOLLLL IN THE DUNGEONS!!!” I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING HELP
[MSG:] I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon.
[MSG:] Uh, I think that pic was for someone else. At least, I hope so…
[MSG:] My gaydar is infallible. Trust me.
[MSG:] I’m actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We’re just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators.
[MSG:] See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
[MSG:] Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
PIXAR’S UP STARTER SENTENCES.
❝ Adventure is out there. ❞
❝ What’s wrong? Can’t you talk? ❞
❝ Hey, I don’t bite… ❞
❝ You and me, we’re in a club now. ❞
❝ You have to swear you will not tell ANYONE. ❞
❝ South America. It’s like America…but south. ❞
❝ You know, you don’t talk very much…I like you! ❞
❝ Take a bath, hippie. ❞
❝ You don’t seem like a public menace to me. ❞
❝ What are you doing out here? ❞
❝ Please let me in. ❞
❝ Don’t touch that! ❞
❝ Well that’s not gonna work. ❞
❝ Whew! I thought you were dead. ❞
❝ Hey, let’s play a game. It’s called: see who can be quiet the longest. ❞
❝ I’m tiiiired. My knee hurts. My elbow hurts and I have to go the bathroom. ❞
❝ But I didn’t have to go then! ❞
❝ I don’t wanna walk anymore. Can we stop? ❞
❝ [ name ], if you don’t hurry up the tigers will eat you. ❞
❝ There’s no tigers in South America. Zoology. ❞
❝ What is that thing?! ❞
❝ No! Stop! That tickles! ❞
❝ That doesn’t even rhyme. ❞
❝ I see you back there. ❞
❝ Go annoy someone else for a while. ❞
❝ Uhhh…we’re not allowed to have dogs in my apartment. ❞
❝ Did that dog just say ‘hi there’? ❞
❝ I just met you and I love you. ❞
❝ Can we keep him/her? Please! Please! Please! ❞
❝ Can I tell you a secret? ❞
❝ Hey, why don’t you get some sleep. ❞
❝ What have I gotten myself into? ❞
❝ We better get moving. ❞
❝ You must be tired. Hungry? ❞
❝ I like you temporarily. ❞
❝ I do not like the cone of shame. ❞
❝ Are you sure I’m not a bother? I’d hate to impose. ❞
❝ You really must stay. I insist. ❞
❝ We have so much to talk about. ❞
❝ Give me your hand! ❞
❝ This is great. I finally meet my childhood hero and he tries to kill us. ❞
❝ It might sound boring, but I think the boring stuff is the stuff I remember the most. ❞
❝ Run, [ name ], run! ❞
❝ This is none of my concern. ❞
❝ I didn’t ask for any of this! ❞
❝ I was hiding under your porch because I love you. ❞
❝ Can I stay? ❞
❝ I am your master. ❞
❝ You are my master. ❞
❝ Let me go! ❞
❝ Scream all you want, [ name ], no one can hear you. ❞
❝ Where are you going?! I’m not finished with you! ❞
❝ I want to help. ❞
❝ I don’t want your help! …I want you safe. ❞
❝ I would like to award you the highest honor I can bestow. ❞
❝ Hey, [ name ]! You’re cheating! ❞
❝ Maybe I need new glasses. ❞
jackson getting excited over astro’s bodies
