Little About Me

My interesting life differently

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Yup

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Peechaya Burroughs

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[exstnce]

vintage | nature | urban

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Cool and brave. I want that. 😀

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Original video for anyone who wants to watch.

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Every turn I made I was faced with even more problems. They were piling up and I just can’t keep up with it anymore.  My view on myself doesn’t help either.  I’m a good for nothing piece of crap and I deserve what has happened to me.  There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about suicide.

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I don’t know how to pull that trigger

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I feel absolutely insane inside. I couldn’t concentrate, but mainly because I couldn’t work and go to school full time.  I also hated school. I don’t want to study. I don’t want to work. I don’t want a house with two kids. I don’t any of that. I don’t want to do anything anymore. 

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I’ve tried numerous times.  I really did, but all of these feelings come back.  The depression hits me like a wave.  I can literally feel the wave consuming my positive thoughts and all that’s left is my shell.

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All I ever feel now a days is sadness and rage.  I can’t let my past go and I know that’s the problem I am facing, but here’s the thing. Ican’t let it go. 

[clacchi]

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The pain I harbor hurts so bad.  The hatred I feel for not only my so called family, but for myself, is consuming me.

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 I also don’t want to hear anything about waiting longer for shit might actually change in two, three, or ten years.  I’ve been depressed since I was in middle school. 

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[sleepymadeleine]

I’ve been on several websites for suicide now.  All forums.  I suppose I keep coming to search for something.  Maybe a reply that says it’s okay. 

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[sleepymadeleine]

Man, I wish my death would equal not existing… So my history and memory could fade away.

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[sleepymadeleine]

I could die though, I signed up to donate my body to science… so.. least there wont be any funeral costs… and my student loans will disappear since my family can’t inherit the debt.