raving mad

there's blood on my nose and my tissue is rotting where the rats chew my bones and my eye socket's empty see nothing but pain i keep havin' this brainstorm about twelve times a day so now, you could spend the morning walking with me quite amazed as i am unwashed and somewhat slightly dazed

[slightlydazed]

SLIGHTLYDAZED a dependent multi-muse blog for ashmorehq  ✶ atlanta brennan ✶ maris monroe ✶ sonny valentine ✶ vincent dunne

[wldminds]

open starter for @ashmorestart

“ go on . spill , “ juni urges , tapping fingers rhythmically against the height of her knee . there’s nothing quite like a free therapy session to make you feel the smallest bit lighter . “ what’s something that really chaps your ass ?? “

[slightlydazed]

"what chaps my ass?" sonny repeated, laughing at the wording the other used, his mood already improving, sonny already feeling the smallest bit lighter due to the entertainment earned by the proposed question. "sorry, i just- i honestly don't know if i've ever heard someone say that before," his smile was friendly; he was in no way making fun of what juniper said, despite laughing because of it. "that's a hard question, though," he finally began thinking about a real answer to give. "i feel like there are a lot of different levels of being annoyed or frustrated at something; major annoyances are totally different to the petty things that can still really frustrate you, you know?" he was stalling, not on purpose, but only because he truly couldn't find his words to string a cohesive answer together, and because he wasn't sure of what level of ass-chapping juniper was asking for.

[ofhermits]

STATUS: closed for atlanta ( @slightlydazed ) ​SETTING: atlanta's apartment

CARSON DOESN'T KNOCK as he pushes his way through the front door of his sister's apartment. he'd texted ahead of time so she knows to expect him, along with the leaning tower of takeout he balances in one hand. ❝ yo attie ! ❞ he calls in lieu of a greeting. ❝ they didn't have the sauce you like so i got— oh. ❞ rather than finish his thought, he stops dead in his tracks as he takes in the chaos before him. streamers, flowers, gift wrap, fabric bolts, and a variety of other materials clutter every possible surface and then some of attie's apartment, bombarding carson's eyes with all sorts of color and glittered frill. over the mess, he shoots his sister a curious look, ❝ sooo, wanna tell me why a craft store threw up on your apartment or ... ? ❞

[slightlydazed]

atlanta would never expect carson to knock, not even when visiting unannounced; her home would always be open for him, and his company would always be welcomed gladly. if atlanta was one thing, it was warm, even as the months grew colder and colder. she had unlocked her door upon receiving his text, and it was a good thing that she had, as she quickly lost herself in her work and completely lost track of time. she was elbow deep in her most obscure boxes of supplies as she heard her brother's voice, the voice snapping her back into reality for the first time in hours.

"it's not that bad, is it?" she asked, laughing as she placed down the sheet of fabric she had been holding, then standing up on her two feet. "i'm looking for something- something i told my client i definitely had," she began to explain, pushing the bleached bangs out of her face. "i know it's around here somewhere..." her eyes scanned the room for the rolls of lace and silk ribbon, and carson almost lost her to her work once again before the smell of the food captured her attention. "sorry," she smiled, knowing she had a tendency to be overinvested in her work. "believe it or not, there is some space clear on the table for you to put that down," she told him.

[slightlydazed]

what's been sonny's favorite role they've performed?

this is a question that sonny himself could never answer; he’s spent his entire life performing - be it in high scale productions on broadway, or to an audience of only his family in his living room. each and every role means so much to him; he’s a sentimental person, so even his first ensemble role is one he holds near and dear to his heart. he has a sappy story for why he’s loved every single role he’s played in every single production he’s ever been in. to save you from the novel that is sonny’s non-answer, however, fiyero in ashmore’s current production of wicked is arguably the truest answer right now. 

after leaving new york and coming home to ashmore, sonny didn’t know if he could ever perform again. it was the first time in his life that he wasn’t performing, dealing with and living in his grief. wicked came about unexpectedly, and even while he originally wasn’t sure that he should even entertain the idea of being in it, it saved him from losing the greatest passion of his life, and in turn, that helped him from succumbing to his grief. surely that’s a good reason to be a favourite, right?

be sure to check out the show at admiral theater! 

[slightlydazed]

what’s atlanta’s favorite season and why?

atlanta finds an almost unbelievable amount of things to love about every single season. as a woman who views most things in a positive light, it’s incredibly hard to choose a favourite anything. most of the time atlanta would answer this question herself by saying whatever season they’re currently in - surrounded and prompted by all of the things that she loves about it - but with that being said, perhaps the real answer is the holiday season. there’s something extra special about winter weddings, gift shopping for her loved ones, and the extra spring in carson’s step as he tells her it’s his favourite time of the year. 

[slightlydazed]

What’s one of Maris’ favorite tattoos?

despite how careless her patchwork style of tattoos appears to be, almost all of maris' tattoos have great meaning to her - some deeper than others, but all in a way that she's attached to and fond of. it's hard to choose a favourite, but perhaps it's the ladybug on her ankle; it was one of the first tattoos that maris ever got, in honour of the ladybug that she dreamt of countless times as a small child. this ladybug was her best friend, her first best friend, and while maris is well aware that it was only a character from her dreams, she'll always love her. in many ways, maris secretly thanks this ladybug for being her first friend, and for helping her replicate the friendship making experience in her real life, too.

[slightlydazed]

what video game changed Vincent’s life and why?

the answer to this question is easily ocarina of time; it's an objectively good video game, one that vinnie and many others still praise highly, but it wouldn't have even needed to be the best video game to have changed his life. ocarina of time is the very first video game that vinnie owned and properly got into playing after he was gifted a second hand N64 - his very first console.

this video game was the one to expose vinnie to the realm of different worlds available to him in this form, the one to light the video game loving fire inside of him. from that day onwards, his life was changed for the better; he found an escape from the sour reality in which he lived, and after a chain of events and years dedicated to so many other video games after the completion of ocarina of time, vinnie's entire life became what it now is built on the foundation of his early experience with video games.

[threefours-deactivated20260404]

𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 : bits & bobs 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐒 : open for anyone @ashmorestart

⸻⸻⸻ “ do you think it's too early to be playing christmas songs? ” niamh asks, stopping in her tracks when last christmas starts playing over the speakers of the thrift store. “ i always thought it was a little bit weird. like, why do people only start setting up for halloween in october, but christmas gets a head start? it isn't even a month away and we haven't had thanksgiving yet. ” she shrugs. she was never big on celebrating holidays, but it's not like she's against it, either. “ the kids keep asking when we can start decorating the classroom for christmas, but we just took down the halloween decorations a few days ago. i don't get it. ”

[slightlydazed]

atlanta couldn't answer her friend's questions immediately, but only because she was genuinely thinking it all through in order to find the right answer and the opinions that she truly believed in. "it is a little bit weird," atlanta firstly agreed. "do you think it might have something to do with the values behind the holidays? even those who don't observe christmas for any religious reasons, for example, make it all about celebrating with their family and their loved ones, which isn't exactly what halloween is about- but then again, thanksgiving is typically treated the same, and i've not heard a peep about it quite yet even despite the start of the christmas music and decorating... but i guess there isn't really any thanksgiving music, and perhaps that's for the best because of the origins..." she trailed off in thought, before chuckling as she caught the fact that she had done so. "i'm not sure if it's too early," she finally circled back to the initial question. "it does feel early, particularly on paper, but i won't stop the holiday cheer from being felt, i suppose."

[chxsingthunder]

location: bits and bobs status: open @ashmorestart

"Ugh, I came here because I needed more things for work," Paxton groaned aloud, picking up a hoodie that was probably at least three sizes too big for him. Which was sort of the exact reason he picked it up; oversized hoodies were the comfiest things in the world. Especially now that it was starting to get a little chillier. "But the only things calling to me are, like, the exact opposite of what I was supposed to be shopping for," he said, sighing and shoving the hoodie back. Then after thinking about it for a moment, he pulled it out again. "I actually really want this."

[slightlydazed]

"if i'm being honest, bits and bobs isn't exactly the first place i'd think of when looking for new pieces for your line of work," sonny told him apologetically, as if the predicament the other was in was his fault in any way. "unless you're good at sewing," he began suggesting. "then i think a lot of these pieces would have a lot of potential; you could turn them into anything you wanted," sonny shrugged. "i wouldn't alter that, though," he spoke of the oversized hoodie the other decided that he wanted. "it looks super comfy as is," he agreed with a small chuckle. "what kind of stuff are you looking for exactly?" he asked.

[cherripicked]

starter for: @slightlydazed's maris monroe location: the chrysalis

what a bitch of a day. louis gets off his underpowered motor scooter, a series of angry shits quietly hissed under his breath. clothes and bones rain-drenched by a heavy shower that would simply refuse to exist. the food, however? safely protected in a huge thermos container. he grunts as he tugs the box under his right arm, heading towards the hotel where he is supposed to bring the customer's order.

louis walks up to the receptionist, eyes set on a small piece of paper to read the ordering information as he begins to speak: "hi, pizza delivery for, uh, room 238."

[slightlydazed]

it wasn't that maris didn't celebrate her birthday, it was only that when it happened to fall on a monday - and a busy monday at that - it was much easier to postpone any sort of celebration to the upcoming weekend. in all honesty, maris preferred getting her work done rather than having a day off and later scrambling to catch up. after a day of working alongside her parents, maris had the evening completely to herself. while she could have easily rounded up some friends to celebrate with her - or even opted to stick by her parents for dinner - the only thing she really felt like was a cheese covered pizza from her favourite local place; that was how louis ended up at her door.

"hey there," she greeted her favourite pizza delivery person upon opening the door. while maris had been greatly looking forward to her night alone, it was admittedly nice to see a familiar face in front of her. "is it really raining that heavily out there? or did you take a dip by the coast before getting here?" she inquired, a somewhat apologetic look on her face showing that she wasn't trying to make fun of him.

[gravestfate]

it wasn't unlike noah to be found lurking after dark, much like maris. the two had found themselves in the same scenario more times than they could count, both professionals at moving stealthily in the dark, and though noah was an attentive person, maris had snuck up on her with apparent ease on multiple occasions. the jumping in fright was a shared experience, just as the laughing afterwards was also. "are we ever gonna learn to look out for each other?" she shrugged. "neither," she continued after the other spoke. "but i really should know to keep my eye out for you by now. what's got you out here tonight?"

[slightlydazed]

"i don't think we are," maris shook her head, a smile on her face as her rapidly beating heart began calming down from the brief fright. despite the fact that their surprise run ins were occasional enough for the two of them to have struck up a friendship of sorts, it was nowhere near consistent enough for maris to be properly expecting or looking out for noah around these parts and around this time. "maybe one day we will," she suggested light-heartedly. "the usual, really. long day at work, need to stretch my legs, catch a change of scenery," she explained. "what about you?" she inquired in return.

[petaltexturedskies]

Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath

[chxsingthunder]

It was probably odd, being all dolled up and just wandering nearly-empty streets at night. Paxton had spent a pretty long time getting ready earlier that evening, too. Making sure he was fashionable, though he wished he were a little warmer for sure. He was just walking, lost in his thoughts and arms crossed over himself to warm himself up in the thin, sheer button down he'd chosen to wear, when he managed to startle Maris, which in turn startled him. He jumped back a bit, eyes widening as he looked at her. "I'm-" his brows furrowed, "sorry?" Truth be told, he hadn't even seen her. "I wasn't trying to sneak up on you, I swear," he said, offering a small smile and holding up his hands in a surrendering motion. "Just figured I'd take the longest route possible home," he admitted.

@slightlydazed

[slightlydazed]

"don't worry," maris began, her own hands mirroring his gesture of surrender and innocence. "i totally believe you," she assured him. it wasn't that shady stuff didn't happen in maris' late night adventures through ashmore, but paxton hadn't displayed any signs of being that way inclined. perhaps that quick assuming would get maris in trouble one day, but that day had not yet crossed them. "i have a habit of not paying the most attention sometimes," in other words, it was her own fault that she got a fright. "the longest route home?" she half questioned, wishing to know more about what the other person meant, but not wanting to so bluntly ask in case he wasn't comfortable with sharing anything in more detail.

[cherripicked]

starter for: @slightlydazed's vincent dunne location: vincent's place

"choke on my cock," louis says in response to whatever nonsense vincent has been spouting. he reaches into the bag of chips, a smattering of salted potato chips disappears in his mouth. hand is then lazily wiped clean on his sweat pants before being wrapped around the game controller again. weight shifted slightly as he makes himself more comfortable on the couch, not intending to get up any time soon.

"what did you say? this one's in an early development stage?" slate blue eyes firmly set on the television that's displaying vincent's newest project he gets to beta test this evening. "—or are you working for an indie studio now?" lips curl into a tired grin.

[slightlydazed]

"c'mon man, watch your language - especially in front of my son," he warned his friend, reaching for his miles morales figurine to cover up his ears half-heartedly. "you're just afraid of hearing the truth," he concluded after his enormous spiel on the modern disappointments of the horror genre in media earnt the response from louis. "this one is in early development stage," he nodded, beginning to feel slightly defensive, despite knowing that he typically never had to be in louis' company. "an indie studio?" he looked down, shaking his head at the shit that came from the mouth of his friends. "you think i'd spend my whole life building vinc. just to move on to some other indie studio?" not to brag, but vincent's own gaming studio was doing pretty well, and as the founder and sole trader, vincent also had complete creative freedom on his own projects.

[landslidc]

"You mean you've never scooped up a fallen ice cream before?" Nathan questioned. "I don't think the consistency of the food matters as much to me as the surface does, like, I'd never eat something that fell in the mud... probably." Nathan was the type to never say never so he couldn't for certain say he wouldn't eat from a muddy puddle but he would absolutely question it first. "Chewy and stale are the same thing. It probably takes forever for them to get here. Isn't Haribo german or something?" Nathan questioned out loud not that the answer really mattered with his opinion. He smiled watching her place the candy that previously had no appeal to her into her bag. "You won't regret it. Are you always so easily persuaded or do I just have a special charm over you?"

[slightlydazed]

"absolutely not," she chuckled, shaking her head. "if it's wet, it's definitely going to pick up something - even if the surface looks pretty good; but if it's something like these," she gestured to the fallen candy nathan had, "they'll be good with a little wipe off," she concluded. "good call," she laughed again, imaging anyone eating muddy food. "i don't think you could wipe that off very easily," she wrinkled her nose at the thought. "i wholeheartedly disagree with you; chewy and stale are two very different things," she argued, but she still smiled - there was no malice. "haribo is german, yeah," she nodded her head, wondering where she had learnt that information from as it felt like something she just knew. "i like to think that i'm open to everything - within reason," atlanta answered with a shrug. "maybe it was a mix of me being easy to persuade and you being charming," she suggested.

[landon-barnes]

Landon smiled and handed over a copy of Pride and Prejudice. "Well. They're both pretty popular, but Miss Elizabeth seems to captivate audiences more than Miss Jane does. As for which is better, well... The Bronte sisters would have you believe that Elizabeth is too proper of a heroine. They believed that Jane Austen, the author, didn't know 'the passions', that she was just superficial. But... I personally believe she was more of a realist. Elizabeth retains her independence and ability to think for herself in ways Jane Eyre does not. But. That's my personal opinion. But... I also prefer Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy over either of these. It's a more gripping story. It's definitely a longer read, but well worth it," they mused. "Sorry for rambling. Can I ask, are these for pleasure reading or obligation?" They wondered if the other had to read it for some sort of literature class, or if he was doing it of his own volition.

[slightlydazed]

it wasn’t that vincent wasn’t a fan of literature, it was more that he wasn’t very well versed outside of his niche area of interest. both of the novels presented by the clerk didn’t happen to find themselves in that small selection of vinnie’s typical reads. thankfully landon proved more than capable of educating vincent on the literature outside of his knowledge - well, at least it was obvious that landon had the knowledge; whether or not vincent could be educated was another issue... "right, right..." vinnie nodded, though he wasn't quite sure that he completely followed. "hey, it's no problem- really," he tried to reassure them with a chuckle. "if morris wasn't my middle name, rambling would have been," he joked. "if i'm being totally honest with you," something that vinnie was a lot, perhaps even when he shouldn't have been, "i don't know if it'd count as pleasure or obligation; there's this girl in my apartment building who's always going on about pride and prejudice, and, well, i guess it's half me wanting to see what all the fuss is about, and half me trying to learn more about it because of her, you know?"

[landon-barnes]

When Maris agreed to come get some evening breakfast, Landon smiled and gladly led the way, falling in step with Maris as they began to walk in that direction. "God, tell me about it. Listen, I love books. Been a bookworm-- no pun intended-- my whole life, but spending all day in the shop gets a little stale after a while. Sometimes a busy diner and the smell of greasy bacon and eggs is exactly the kind of change you need," they said with a quiet laugh. They slid their hands into the pocket of their jacket and glanced over towards Maris. "So, was it a good big day, or more of a bad day kind of thing? Or a mix of both...?" they asked with a little smirk.

[slightlydazed]

maris smiled at landon's words; as someone who didn't often express herself openly enough to be understood, to feel that feeling was rare and always welcomed when she found it. "i couldn't agree with you more," she nodded, a small chuckle of her own leaving her lips as landon laughed quietly. "mmm," she began in contemplation at their question, thinking back over her day, quietly processing all that had happened. "i think it was somewhere in between, sometimes good, sometimes bad- or actually, i don't know," she cocked her head to the side as she thought. "maybe it would be more accurate to say that it was just a neutral big day; i can't think of anything especially good or especially bad that happened. does that even make sense?" she asked again as they walked.