The Illusion of Conflict @smallteamcom-blog - Tumblr Blog

dear friends, you don’t need more volume to be heard.

Recognize these individuals!? If not, they are the Average Joe’s dodgeball team! Not only are they a championship caliber team, they are a great system! There were so many factors that led to the Average Joe’s becoming a great system and defeating White Goodman and the Purple Cobras. How did they do this you might ask? Well...

Every team member on the Average Joe’s needed each other to be successful, on and off the dodgeball court. All of them possessed different skills that ended up helping the group achieve their goal of winning the tournament. Not only do they get along, they truly believe in sticking together and trusting one another, along with trusting those certain skills. Even though we see some of the team members take a leave of absence, i.e. Peter and Steve the Pirate, they both return knowing that the team couldn’t succeed without their unique skills and qualities. Without them, they would have not been able to restore the balance that their team possessed and continue to play in unison.

Everyone on the team not only enjoyed being a part of the team, they enjoyed what they were doing as a team. Gordon for example, ignited the Average Joe’s in believing that playing dodgeball and winning a boat load of money would help Peter save the gym. That set off a new attitude among the members because they all cared so deeply about the gym and one another. That created a shared vision among the team making their goal not seem that far away.

We saw that at the end of the tournament, everything came together for the Average Joe’s. They finally had synergy! Everyone did their part, used their skills and other team members skills to their full potential, and effectively built off of prior experiences.They stayed focused and driven, all the way to the bitter end of their journey. That’s what it’s all about, sticking together and focusing on the process of achieving goals as a cohesive unit.

Written by: Bill “the thrill” Radatz

#teamworkmakesthedreamwork

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When working in high pressure situations it’s easy to let anger and aggression get the best of you. When conflict arises while working in teams it can end up preventing growth and progress from taking place. Conflict, both negative and positive is inevitable when working with multiple individuals. Don’t let the conflict get to your head and don’t waste your time letting your blood boil. Grab the bull by the horns and learn to rationally and responsibly solve conflict to avoid further disagreements.

Here are a few tips to keep in mind when dealing with conflict in your teams:

· Identify a goal or shared vision- A shared vision is something the entire teams wants to achieve. It’s a goal that you ALL agree upon. Having a shared vision will help reduce conflict in your team meetings because it will reduce the chances of confusion. Confusion leads to a lack of productivity which leads to an increase of irritation. Eliminate that irritation by making sure each team member is on the same page.

· Express your thoughts appropriately- Conflict cannot occur unless someone has expressed an issue or problem. Don’t be afraid to share your feelings but do it professionally. Don’t put down or use hurtful language. Express your ideas in the nicest way possible. The better attitude you carry the less hostile the environment will be.

· Take time to see their point of view- Everyone’s perspective is different, and everyone deals with conflict in their own way. If you don’t agree with something take a moment to step in their shoes. Try and see it from their point of view. It will create a better understanding for the both of you while also reducing the amount of conflict in your team.

· Be Assertive- Be blunt about your feelings, wants and needs but don’t forget to consider the wants and needs of others. Be straight forward but don’t be aggressive. Express your needs but be smart about the language you use and your tone of voice. Don’t come across bossy or rude, it will just create a setback. Be respectful but don’t forget that your ideas matter too.

· Collaborate- Be extremely assertive and extremely cooperative. Try and find a solution where everybody wins. This allows everyone to get not only what they need but also what they want. Collaborating a long process so keep a positive attitude and try to find a solution that benefits everybody.

· Compromising- Although collaborating is the goal, things don’t always work out the way we want them too. If you try your best but all else fails try compromising. Try finding a happy medium between all parties involved. This will allow conflict to reduce and will allow you and your team to move forward.

Written by: Lauren Tschirhart

#friends #conflict resolution #collaboration #compromise

A wise man by the name of Benjamin Franklin once said "Hide not your talents. They for use were made. What's a sundial in the shade?" Every being on earth holds a blend of individualistic strengths that are unique to just them. Each person has exclusive skills, ideas and talents that they bring to the table. This Ben Franklin quote is a friendly reminder to not be afraid to show these strengths, as we were granted them for a specific reason and if we were to not use them, they would be a waste. Since each person is distinct and original we must all deal with conflict in different ways. Being different is not negative, it’s what sets us apart from the crowd. We must study ourselves and learn our strengths and weaknesses so we can better understand our differences and make the best use of them. Knowing your strengths will help you understand why you perceive conflict the way that you do. Your strengths can teach you how to manage conflict in your own special way. If you are not already aware of the individual skills you excel at I recommend you take this Strength Finders Quiz. http://freestrengthstest.workuno.com/free-strengths-test.html this quiz is meant to help you find your favored way of thinking, feeling, and behaving. Once you know and establish your strengths you will be able to solve conflict much more swiftly than before. Conflict is a normal part of any working relationship. The more people involved in a relationship increases the chance of a conflict arising. Hence why it’s hard to avoid conflict when working in teams. When conflict is handled in a respectable way it can actually strengthen the bond between the parties involved. Your strengths help you understand your ability to recognize and manage emotions which will ultimately determine how you handle conflict. To summarize conflict is an overall process, and it takes a separate process to solve it. When solving conflict in your teams remember your INPUT. Your input is the strengths that you bring to the team, it’s how you act, think and why. Your input effects how you handle situations of conflict and ultimately helps shape how your team handles conflict. Every process is filled with trial and error. Work with your teams to highlight each person’s strengths so you can learn the best way of working together. Finally your individual skills will lead you to a team output or product. Which in this case would be your CONFLICT RESOLUTION. This resolution is ever changing based on the process at hand. Your team needs to take time to grow, adapt and change to find the best solution possible. Conflict is not negative but it can be a tedious process. Remember to always give conflict resolution the time it deserves because conflict is like a fire, if not taken care of it will spread.

Written by: Lauren Tschirhart

#benjamin franklin #personal strengths #conflict resolution #conflict

Each and every individual brings something useful and unique to a team. It takes EVERYONE involved to become a successful and prosperous team. To reduce the chances of unproductive conflict during your team meetings it helps for each teammate to be assigned a ROLE or a specific duty. What do you bring to the table when meeting with your teammates? Take this quiz and find out.....

Written by: Lauren Tschirhart

#conflict resolution #team roles #teamwork

One Team; Four Different Perspectives

If you were to ask a room full of people what the definition of conflict is, each and every answer would be different. This is because individuals posses their own unique perspective on conflict. If you are working within a group and are having trouble with conflicts, first take into consideration that each of your other group members have their own perspective on the situation, and on conflict and confrontation in general. To really highlight just how different conflict perspectives can be, we are going to share with you 4 different definitions of conflict. Who are these people that are going to share their perspectives, you ask? Well, that would be the writers of this very blog, Team Perriwinkle!

how Danielle views conflict: I would describe conflict as a disagreement between two or more people that can either result in stronger relations amongst the people involved, or weaker relations. Conflicts are a result of differences in opinion, miscommunication, and a lack of understanding and accepting between members of a group. I believe conflicts are best dealt with head on, and letting a conflict go unsolved and boiling beneath the surface will only result in more conflict, and a more difficult road to conflict resolution. A conflict within a group is not a road block, it is just a speed bump that every single person will have to go through when working with other people.

how Sara views conflict: To me, a conflict is when two or more parties having opposing arguments or views on something. This can be how to do something or even that “something” as a whole. Conflicts must be expressed, if they’re not they’re just grudges or something that you don’t like. I believe that conflict, especially knowing ways to solve conflicts, is an important part of teams. Teammates really need to learn to work together and understand each other to resolve the conflict, and by doing that you can learn a lot about your teammate and what’s important to them. I try to use the conflict style of collaboration a lot, because everyone gets what they want, and my win in conflicts is for everyone to leave happy and pleased with the outcome. Conflict happens often and it is important that people to know how to deal with it.

how Lauren views conflict: When I think of conflict I too think of a disagreement. Most of the conflict in my life stems from a disagreement with someone. That disagreement can quickly escalate and turn into an argument and that argument represents conflict. Conflict occurs when two or more people are struggling to reach an understanding. If handled correctly conflict can actually be a positive thing, but when handled incorrectly a simple misunderstanding can quickly turn disastrous. When dealing with conflict in teams don’t forget to perspective take. It’s easy to see something from your point of view but closed minded thinking is ignorant. In order to be successful you must be open minded. Lastly, don’t rush the conflict resolution process. Creating a mutual understanding isn’t always easy, take ample time to create the best outcome possible.

how Bill views Conflict: I feel that conflict is something we should never, ever avoid in our lives. Conflict arises among people when there are different opinions, ideas, thoughts, understandings etc. Letting conflict between two people or a group build up overtime will eventually come back and most likely blow up in your face. Don’t be afraid of conflict. It is something that is healthy and natural. Just like how food and water helps us stay alive, we need conflict to stay alive, especially in the world of team projects, relationships, etc. Don’t ever let conflict ruin something in your life. Take the opportunity to think about past experiences with conflict and reach out to those who are being affected by the conflict as well. No conflict is ever to big to handle in life.

written by: Team Perriwinkle

A Tree Is a System!

Roots: the basis of the team, what cultivates it; understanding each member’s Emotional Intelligence, bringing individual inputs, and creating a shared vision with the team

Trunk: what holds the team together; working interrelated and interacting, understanding each other’s conflict styles and working through conflict effectively, and creating an efficient process as a team

Branches: how everything comes together; each individual plays an important part in bringing together the output, and their Meyers Briggs Personality Types play a big role in how they process and use their information.

Leaves: the output, what the team creates and learns; teams must find a balance when working together, and the output reflects that balance. The balance is the way the team worked together overall, and how they didn’t let other outside factors affect their work.

written by~ Sara

Have you ever found yourself in a struggle with another person? Or multiple people? Maybe because everyone wanted something different or wanted to do something a different way? When this struggle is expressed, it becomes a conflict.

There are many ways to deal with conflicts, and everyone deals with them differently. This may be due to previous experiences with conflicts, what they view their role in the conflict is, the type of relationship they have with the person they’re in conflict with, and many other factors that are unique to the individuals.

Another thing that is unique to each individual is the “win” in conflict, or what they hope to achieve from the conflict. The win may be finding an outcome that pleases everyone, or finding the most efficient outcome. It is important to recognize everyone’s win and to recognize what is important to them. Being able to see other people’s perceptions of a situation makes it easier to find a solution that benefits each party.

written by~ Sara

Conflict Styles & Your MBTI Personality

Working in groups can be tricky because anytime people with different personalities come together, conflicts will follow! But have you ever wondered why you handle conflicts the way that you do, and how your personality could influence that? Well wonder no more, because I am here to tell you that, yes, your personality does play a role in your determining your conflict style! Below I will give in depth descriptions of each conflict style, along with which MBTI’s typically use each one. If you have never taken the MBTI test, you can take it here, or check out the charts above and decide which type fits you best!

1)Competitive: This conflict style can be described as the most aggressive and assertive. They are not shy about your strong opinions, and the main goal for them in a conflict is to be the winner. They are persuasive and confident during arguments. If you are competitive you are not phased by confrontation and see it has something that is unavoidable and easy to handle.

MBTI types most likely to be competitive

INTJ: Driven and confident about their goals and plans. Independent and have high expectations that they make sure are met by both themselves and the other people in the group.

ESTJ: Realists, and do what needs to be done in order to reach their goal. Quick to make decisions and work efficiently to organize and motivate others. Takes the lead in making plans, and expect others to follow them.

ENTJ: Very comfortable taking on the leadership role. Places value on being logical and efficient. Takes pride in being knowledgable and passing on that knowledge to others in order to achieve goals.

2) Collaborating: Assertive with presenting their ideas but also accepting and open to the ideas of others. Consider themselves to be “problem solvers” and place importance on working together to resolve conflicts. Good at working within groups and relieving tensions within group relations. Understand that conflicts and confrontations are natural aspects of life.

MBTI types most likely to be collaborative

INFP: Very adaptable, flexibly, and understanding of others. Eager to solve problems by looking at all possibilities and ideas.

INFJ: Enjoys the perspectives of others, and want to cultivate the potential of others. Organized, decisive, and seeks to solve problems for the common good of the group.

ESFP: Accepting of others and enjoys making plans and working with other people. Easily adapts to new people, situations, and environments.

ESTP: Energetic and enthusiastic problem solvers. Enjoys working actively with others and very tolerant of different people and ideas

3) Compromising: Seek to find solutions that benefit everyone in the group. Progress can only be made if everyone understands they must sacrifice some things for the good of the group. Promotes cooperation amongst group members involved in conflict.

MBTI types most likely to be compromising

ENTP: Outspoken and quick to strategically solve problems. Good at reading people and accepting who they are.

ESFJ: Very cooperative and seek to establish balance and harmony in their environments. Appreciates the contributions of others.

ISTP: Seeks to figure out the best way to solve a problem and to solve it as quickly and efficiently as possible. Organized and logical.

4) Avoiding: Hates conflict, and tries to avoid it all together. Does not see conflict as being necessary but instead finds it to be pointless. Shy and withdrawn in any confrontational situation.

MBTI types most likely to be avoiding

ISFP: Shy and reserved, dislikes conflict and arguments. Values their alone time and personal space.

ENFP: Appreciative and supportive of other people. Shy away from working in social environments and would rather observe patterns and connections between ideas and events.

INTP: Quiet and observant. Would rather solve problems by looking at facts, data, and information. Introverted.

5) Accommodating: Willing to sacrifice their own wants and needs in order to solve conflicts. You see conflict as being disastrous, unless you take the bullet and do whatever you can to make the other people in your group happy. You place more value on saving relationships than “winning” arguments.

MBTI types most likely to be accommodating

ISFJ: Very considerate of the feelings of others. Loyal and responsible.Strive to maintain order and harmony in their relationships and environment.

ENFJ: Empathetic and in tune with the needs and emotions of others. Facilitates group growth and interested in helping others reach their potential.

ISTJ: Realistic and responsible, looks at problems logically. Known for being loyal and dependable.

As you can see, each conflict style can be easily linked with different MBTI personalities. The more you understand why you handle conflicts the way you do, you can gain perspective on why others handle conflicts the way that they do. So next time your group finds itself in the midst of a conflict, remember that everyone possesses their own unique personality with different ways of dealing with conflict. By harnessing each others differences rather than resisting them, you can work together to resolve conflicts and work together as an efficient system!

written by: Danielle

Whats That Conflict Style!

Lets play a game! Below are descriptions of fictional people, with details about their personality and how they typically handle confrontation and conflicts. Since the first step to being able to resolve conflicts is to identify the different conflict styles, your job is to figure out what conflict style each person uses, based on the information given. Good luck!

1) Sasha: Sasha prides herself on always finding the solutions to problems. Her goal within arguments is to work together to come up with a resolution. She does not shy away from conflict, as she knows that it is unavoidable, especially when working with others. Sasha embraces the perspectives of others, and believes that the best way to solve a conflict is to come together to find a resolution. Two heads are better than one is a phrase she uses quite often!

What is Sasha’s conflict style?

a) Compromising b) Accommodating c) Collaborating d) Avoiding e) Competing

2) Harrison: When conflict is headed Harrison’s way, Harrison runs promptly in the opposite direction. In Harrison’s mind, trying to solve conflicts is pointless, and he would rather just stay away from any situation that could potentially lead to confrontations. If he were to order a sandwich at a restaurant with no mayonnaise on it, and the waitress were to mess it up and give him a sandwich heavily slathered with the condiment, Harrison would eat the entire thing, leave a huge tip, and then never dine there again.

What is Harrison’s conflict style?

a) Competing b) Avoiding c) Accommodating d) Compromising e) Collaborating

3) Ellie: Ellie is a nice girl, sometimes so nice that some consider her to be a bit of a “push over”. Ellie will do anything to resolve conflict, even if it means she has to sacrifice her own needs. She is a great listener, and really does her best to make the other person/ people in the argument happy. For Ellie, maintaining relationships is far more important that “winning” an argument.

What is Ellie’s conflict style?

a) Accommodating b) Avoiding c) Competing d) Collaborating e) Compromising

4) Darrien: Darrien always needs to be right. That is his biggest concern when dealing with conflicts, figuring out who is “right” and relentlessly pushing his viewpoint upon others. He does not have bad intentions, he just sees conflict as having a correct solution and an incorrect solution. Spoiler alert: the solution he deems as being correct is usually the one that he supports. If arguing were a sport, Darrien would be a gold medalist.

What is Darrien’s conflict style?

a) Avoiding b) Collaborating c) Accommodating d) Compromising e) Competing

5) Tessa: Tessa does not want anybody to walk away from a conflict empty handed, the resolution must satisfy everyone involved in at least some way, or for Tessa, the conflict is not truly resolved. She works with children, and has learned that the best way to work through conflicts is for all parties involved to agree upon a “happy medium”. Nobody is above or below anybody else, everybody is smack dab in the middle and on the same level.

What is Tessa’s conflict style?

a) Collaborating b) Competing c) Avoiding d) Compromising e) Accommodating

So what are the correct answers? Well, Sasha is a classic collaborative conflict style. Darrien is a shining example of a competing conflict style. Ellie, with her need to put others before herself, uses accommodating conflict style. Harrison and his fear of confrontation is a classic avoiding style. And “meet in the middle” Tessa is all about compromising. These people may be 100% fictional, but you are 100% real, so figure out which category you fall into. Are you a Darrien? or are you more of a Tessa? Whether you are a student or not, working with other people and working in groups is basically inevitable, and conflicts WILL happen. If you can figure out your own personal style of dealing with conflict, you can find your way to a rational solution much more efficiently working with others will be a little less intimidating.

written by: Danielle

Starting out: Some do’s and don’ts...

We all want to work in meaningful and effective groups, right? Well, there are a few things you need to avoid, and some things you need to complete when you are first approaching a group situation. First, lets look at some things that you should do within your group to be effective and efficient right off the bat. Don’t just ask what their favorite color is or where they are from, get to know them personally (EQ). Don’t just think of them as group members, think of them as teammates.

You should also ask your team members how they feel about certain things and ask them why they would feel that way. Especially when it comes time to expressing their thoughts and opinions about a task you need to complete. One last bit of advice you could use would be to put yourself in your team members shoes for once. Trust that their thoughts and feelings are beneficial to the group and could be used in the future. Set aside your feelings and try to see it from their perspective.

Now looking at the other side of the spectrum, lets talk about a few things to avoid in our teams. First, don’t wait for someone else in the group to bring up an issue with another team member. Speak up! Don’t be afraid to say what it is on your mind. Especially if it’s with another team member because a situation like that could get real ugly and ineffective. Conflict may arise, but don’t be scared of it! (We’ll talk more about that later).

Second, don’t ever stop dating your team members. Keep morale up by having meetings at different, fun locations to shake things up and making sure that communication is never cut off and used on a frequent basis. Finally, don’t try to take total control of the team. It is great to be engaged and involved, but first you have to control your own work, and your situation. Not your teammates. Doing this could turn away team members from wanting to participate and make a contribution to towards the team.

Written by: Bill ‘the thrill” Radatz

QUIZ: What is your negative role?

You just went over a project that’s due next Monday, what’s your first thought?

a) It can wait until Sunday

b) Wait, what am I supposed to do?

c) I’ve already planned when we are going to meet, and how the work will be divided, but I’ll probably do all of it

What is your biggest problem you run into with your work?

a) I don’t give myself enough time to finish

b) I don’t understand the instruction

c) I can’t trust anyone else, I can do it better than the others

Which do you find the hardest when working on projects?

a) Starting early and giving myself time to work on it

b) Knowing what I have to do and asking for help when I’m not sure

c) I do too much work on my own

Which statement best describes you?

a) I work better under pressure, so waiting until the last minute to start my work is not a problem

b) It takes me a while to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing, but eventually I’ll understand it enough

c) I prefer to be the leader of the group, and if that means doing most of the work on my own to ensure that it’s correct then that’s okay

Which type of teammate bothers you the most?

a) Someone who wants to start and finish right away

b) Someone who doesn’t think to help/doesn’t want to help the other teammates

c) Someone who doesn’t take their work seriously

If you answered A to most of the questions, you are a procrastinator. You wait a while, sometimes even until the last second, to start your work. This may work for you sometimes, but start to think about the benefits of having more time to finish, look over and perfect your work

If you answered B to most of the questions, you are the confused. You are a little disorganized and often feel lost when given a new assignment. Don’t forget to go over the instruction and notes multiple times, and don’t be afraid to ask for help!

If you answered C to most of the questions, you are a control freak. Your grades and coming out on top are important to you, so you often find yourself getting frustrated with people who do not have the same mindset that you do, and you end up doing most of the work. Start to establish trust within your team, try to get them to trust you and allow yourself to trust them. You will feel a lot less pressure, and have a lot less work to do.

written by~ Sara

Have you ever been in a group where there has been some sort of conflict? Conflict is something that a lot of us want to avoid in life because we know that it is bound to happen. Were there certain terms that came to mind or were brought up while the conflict was happening? Think about those past experiences you may have had with conflict and think about any terms that came up during that time. With that being said, go ahead and try out this conflict resolution word search and see if you recognize any terms! As you complete the word search, think about what some of those terms mean and how they may have delayed you and your group from reaching your group’s goals. Enjoy!

By: Bill “the thrill” Radatz

#conflict resolution

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Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.

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