incorrect haikyuu quotes

𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 ♡ bokuto’s little happy corner ♡ 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 ( tysm for all the love ૮₍˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶₎ა )

[smolbokuto]

tendou: sometimes i don't realize that an event was traumatic until i tell it as a funny story and notice that ushi is staring at me weird

[smolbokuto]

kunimi: if you had to choose between oikawa and all the money i have in my wallet, which would you choose?

iwaizumi: that depends, how much money are we talking about?

oikawa: iwa!

kunimi: 57 cents

iwaizumi: i'll take the money

oikawa: IWAIZUMI

[smolbokuto]

daichi: you have to apologize to hinata

kageyama: fine

kageyama: 'unfuck you' or whatever

hinata:

[smolbokuto]

bokuto: if olive oil is made from olives..

kuroo: yeah?

bokuto: then baby oil-

kuroo: STOP

[smolbokuto]

bokuto: if i was the last person on earth, would you date me?

akaashi: if you were the last person on earth i wouldn't exist

bokuto:

[smolbokuto]

nishinoya: we don't usually download movies illegally... because we are honest and hardworking people

tanaka: and we dont know how

[smolbokuto]

bokuto: it's so hot in here... [unbuttons shirt]

akaashi: i know... but why are you unbuttoning MY shirt?

[smolbokuto]

nishinoya: rules are made to be broken

daichi: they were made to be followed, nothing is made to be broken

tanaka: uh, piñatas

hinata: glow sticks

sugawara: karate boards

asahi: spaghetti when you have a small pot

nishinoya: rules

daichi:

[smolbokuto]

'can i copy the homework?'

daichi: i can help you with it!

ushijima: yeah, sure

terushima: bold of you to assume i did the homework

oikawa: lol nope

bokuto: wait, we had homework?!?!?!

kuroo: [read 5:55pm]

[smolbokuto]

kuroo: who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?

daichi: language!

oikawa: yeah watch your fucking language

ushijima: okay who taught oikawa the fuck word?

terushima: 'the fuck word'

bokuto: are you stupid? you guys use the f word all the time

oikawa: oh my god he censored it

terushima: say fuck, bokuto

oikawa: do it, bokuto.. say fuck

[smolbokuto]

oikawa: is stabbing someone immoral?

kuroo: not if they consent to it

bokuto: depends who you are stabbing

daichi: YES?!?

[smolbokuto]

bokuto: [screams]

kuroo: [screams louder to assert dominance]

akaashi: should we do something?

kenma: nah, i wanna see who wins

[smolbokuto]

daichi: [walking into his house] hello, people who do not live here

kuroo: hey

oikawa: hi

ushijima: hello

bokuto: hey!

daichi: i gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!

terushima: we were out of doritos

[smolbokuto]

sugawara: [texting daichi] heey

daichi: heyo

sugawara: what you doing?

daichi: just studying

sugawara: is there an exam tomorrow?

daichi: yes, two actually lol

sugawara: damn i was about to go to sleep

sugawara: now thanks to you imma go to sleep worried

[smolbokuto]

kuroo: so what are we? are we friends or a couple?

kenma: i don't know

kuroo: but what do you want?

kenma: the new nintendo

kuroo: but i was talking abou-

kenma: with the new zelda

[smolbokuto]

bokuto: hey, do you think i could fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?

daichi: you are a hazard to society

kuroo: and a coward, do twenty

[smolbokuto]

yamaguchi: so what's it like being tsukki's brother?

akiteru: once i asked him for a glass of water while he was mad at me and he brought me a glass with ice and said "wait"