Snow and Toad

Always Trust A Redhead 22-Trainee-Hospital

[luxxyoung-blog]

It was actually a pretty nice day to be outside, the sun was shining bright and making it easy for the mood to be light and positive. She didn’t judge Snow for the family she was born into.  Hell, hers was …a mess. In every damn way possible. And pretty dead, but that wasn’t something the outbreak triggered. “Hope is everything we can give each other these days. And you will be accepted in here, don’t worry about that. People here just need some time and you will be fine, I promise. Besides, you got me now, don’t you?” Lux answered her with a big grin plastered on her face. The blush on Snow’s face amused her, her innocence about these things. It was rare. “There’s no such thing as too weird. Don’t shy away from anything because you think someone may not like you the way you are. There’ll always be someone that appreciates exactly that…weirdness. What makes you different or unique. Well, I said technically because ..I don’t know. I don’t like labels. Especially not these days, we all have other things to focus on. It’s complicated. Um..well..I don’t …I don’t know, It’s nothing exclusive we’re just kinda venting and shit. I don’t want to pull Travis into anything.”

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow smiled brightly at Lux, it felt so good to hear someone say that. Sitting there and talking about tough topics like the past, and to move onto such normal topics like boys was amazing. It was the first time in a very long time like she was sitting there like a normal girl just talking with a friend. “Yeah, alright. I guess I just have to be myself, and someone might like me for who I am. As long as they’re not a douchebag” she said with a giggle. Snow tried not to let her disappointment show on her face too much as Lux said Travis’s name. Snow tried not too, but she did have a little crush on him, even though he acted in a more brotherly/fatherly/protective way towards her, he was still handsome and mysterious. “Oh, it’s Travis? Well, he’s such a great guy. And I think that if it’s something you both really want, then you should just go for it. Why go around pretending? No one knows how much time we have left so you should just...be together. You don’t have to call it boyfriends and girlfriends”

[luxxyoung-blog]

“Materialistic things are just…pointless. But not succumbing to these things shows you’re better, bigger than that.” Getting to know Snow better was ..actually great. She seemed like a quiet person, but now that they were talking, she probably just needed time to open up to people. Lux’ smile was warm and encouraging, she knew what it felt like to be different or feel like the world is against you. But she also learned to cope with it, make the best out of that situation. “That sucks. Unfortunately, that’s how the world works these days. Used to. People are lead by the need to have it all. Consumed and ridden by what they see on TV, or what you can buy with money. Maybe this is our payback for all the shit we did.” She said quietly, her head rolled sideways to look at Snow. “You should, though. Catch up on everything you’ve missed all these years and just take the opportunity to live. We can’t change this situation right now anyway, so better make the best out of it I guess. Hm? I…no. Not really. He’s…not my boyfriend so technically no.”

[snowxbishop-blog]

Smiling back at Lux, Snow felt good for admitting that, at least Lux believed her when she said it. People would sometimes think it was easy for Snow to say she wanted a simpler life because she could have whatever she wanted. “Maybe this a way to show us what really matters. Try and become decent again. Everyone here has showed that to me. Even though I’m kinda not accepted, the way everyone helps each other, cares for each other, gives me a lot of hope.” Snow had always imagined what it would be like to be in a relationship, but she always brushed it off as something she could never have. She couldn’t really imagine any guy being able to look past her innocence and nativity. “I don’t know, maybe. If someone liked me, I guess I would. I don’t know who would like me, though. I think I might be a bit too...weird for anyone. Really, why not? If you like him, why not just ask him? And obviously he likes you too, if you’re only “technically” not dating him. Who is it?”

[itsjustastrid-blog]

Astrid watched Snow as she was stood in awe whilst holding her sword. Astrid smiled as she took the sword back “ Never held anything like that before?” She asked as she put it away. “It’s funny, I was against violence before all this happened. I hated weapons, I hated violence. I was one of those peace makers people. Always found a way so there wouldn’t be any confrontation”  She said “Now look at me, I clean that sword nearly everyday and sharpen it, and I got out there and kill those things as a living.” “What happened to you when all this started?” Astrid asked seeing as she knew nothing about Snow

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow shook her head, a quiet “Nuh-uh” left her mouth. Even though she was learning how to fight, she hadn’t yet had the chance to learn how to use any kind of weapon, that sort of stuff just felt completely out of her league. “I don’t really see it as violence, though. We don’t have anyone protecting us anymore, no police or an army. So...all the stuff they did for us we have to do. I don;t know if that makes sense, but it’s what I tell myself to not be afraid”. Snow was fairly easily frightened, but she was trying to work on becoming braver. She needed to be, now that there was no one to protect her. “Erm, well, I lived in Miami, with my family. My parents got sick first, and then some of the staff. My brother’s friends had decided to go to the log cabin in the woods, a little ways out from here, where they used to go hunting. And my brother took me with him. We walked most of the way, it took us a really long time. What about you, are you from round here?”

[luxxyoung-blog]

“Maybe you shouldn’t do that. I mean, pretending like you’re too good to hear it is kinda..a turn off for most. Just be yourself and, well, whoever doesn’t like you can suck a tit.” Lux joined her fit of giggled with a quiet laugh, hands propped onto the bench as she leaned back and rolled her head into her neck. “Exactly. They can find another place to stay if they don’t like it. No one is forcing them to stay and follow rules or shit. And your brother should set his priorities right.” She added the last part with a sigh. It wasn’t like she always got along with Nash either, they were hot-headed, stubborn people that always need to be right. And never have the same opinion on anything. But even if they fought, they knew that having each other was a privilege. “So you’re pretty ..ah, what do they say? Posh? No, money can’t buy you anything that’s really important. It satisfies luxury needs, but personal ones? Wait — you weren’t allowed to have a boyfriend? Why did you allow them to control you like that? I know I would’ve just..bailed. Not because of the boyfriend thing. I’ve believed the true meaning of life is freedom. For me at least. And that’s what we all are. Maybe not physically, but we’re all starting anew. There’s no money to our name, no crime that makes us less worth than others. Everything you do starting from the day you enter this place is what matters. Not who you used to be. You can finally be the person that has her freedom. Let go of everything in the past, move on from that and learn. But right now? You’re an unwritten book with so many left to fill. People here don’t know you, they don’t care whether you had a shitload of money, a disease, whatever. You write your own story now. And you can have any guy you want without anyone interfering. Anyone you have your eyes set on as a free woman? 

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow shrugged, a little embarrassed, “Yeah, you could say that. I never really saw myself that way, mostly because I didn’t want all of that. I didn’t want the big house and fancy cars and expensive clothes. I don’t like what it stands for. It’s not like I ever worked hard to earn any of it, so what does that show of me?” She kind of felt like a backwards fairytale, a princess with everything she could wish for, but all she wanted was a little house and a dog. And in a strange way, she kind of got that. “Well, I was different. No one ever trusted anyone’s intentions so they thought they were trying to get at my families money by...exploiting me, I guess.” Snow looked at Lux wide eyed. Everything she was saying, about her life being a story she could write for herself, it filled her with hope, that she didn’t ever have to be the way she was before. Blushing and covering her face, Snow said, “Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t really gotten to know anybody. But all of the guys here are so handsome, it’s like you all hand picked them. What about you, do you have a boyfriend?”

[luxxyoung-blog]

Lux quietly laughed along the other woman, for the first time genuinely appreciating her. She hadn’t been around Snow a whole lot and never gotten the chance to really get to know her, but so far? She seemed like someone she could easily call  a friend in no time. It was just something about Snow, something…innocent that this place clearly lacked. “Oh pretending to be mature and smart is totally my thing too. Sometimes I just throw in terms I know people don’t understand to sound smart.” She added laughing, a hand running over her nose as she avoided the little snort that threatened to leave her throat. “They won’t even have the time to boss anyone around. Let alone baby you. You’re grown ass woman, you’re fucking capable on your own. I strongly believe that when you’re supposed to  be in charge of your uterus, you’re allowed to do whatever you want. But..also, don’t listen to me. I’m really bad at rules and listening and following orders.” Lux quickly threw in, grimacing at herself before she went quiet for a moment. “No no, it’s okay just ask what you want to know. I used to do all…that computer stuff before already. I started when I was around sixteen or seventeen. Just..kinda had to support myself with something and it’s also a great way to threaten people that don’t like you. And friends, I never really had a lot of friends to be honest. I was on the road most of the time, didn’t have a set home or place. I was on my own my whole life and friends just didn’t happen. I’d leave town after a couple of days anyway. And I met my brother two years ago. We didn’t grow up together. He grew up in southkorea with..our father and I grew up here, a christian orphanage. Sounds as thrilling as it was, I know. So I’m still getting to know Nash just like everybody else. It’s sad that your brother was such a dick to you when you grew up. Just kinda feels like some people don’t appreciate what they have.”

[snowxbishop-blog]

“If I knew enough big words I’d be doing that too, except I don’t. I’ve just spent enough time around preppy girls to know how to look at people. You know, like you’re looking at them as if what their saying to you is totally not cool and you’re too good to hear it. I haven’t used it in a long time, but I totally should around some people” Snow said, laughing along with Lux. She composed herself just long enough to raise an eyebrow at her, mouth slightly agape as if what she was saying was completely below her, before busting out into a soft giggle again. “You’re right, I am capable. I can decide what I want to do. And when I’m all trained up, I’m going to get a real job. And if they don’t want to stay here then they can go and find somewhere else. I can do what I want, and I want to stay here”. She listened to Lux’s story, completely in awe of how different their lives had been. If her mother had heard this, she’d have ushered Snow off, telling her not to hang out with her sort. “No, I guess they don’t appreciate it. But it’s good that you found each other, even if you don’t know each other that well. I guess that means you get to appreciate each other more. Mylo never appreciated anything, nothing was ever enough for him. We were given everything we ever wanted, handed to us on a silver platter. But it couldn’t buy you friends, no matter how hard my mom tried with me. And I could never get a boyfriend. Though, I don’t know whether that was because of the way I am or whether my family was a huge terrifying corporation. It’s weird, I guess none of that matters anymore, everyone is in the same position. No one has anything except for what we can get ourselves. ”

[luxxyoung-blog]

“I’m trying to apply for the open spot as hospital psychiatrist.” She slowly lifted her shoulders with a chuckled. Lux was glad that she was able to help Snow somehow. She had been around a lot, met a lot of different people with different personalities and stories. A lot of shit that she’s experienced and let herself be drowned in, so she learned how to deal with it and make the best out of everything. If she could, she’d offer Snow work at the Tech room. But there wasn’t really a lot she could teach Snow, aside from some Basic’s she’ll never be able to use on anything. So maybe with the training she was receiving along with Toad being a natural hunter, they could join the supply runners at some point. “There always is a point where people find out that…you have to cherish what you got. He found out later rather than sooner, but he did. That’s all that matters. This whole situation changed all of us. But I don’t think we could just…pick favorites if the group should find us. But they’ll always have a hard time if they continue only caring about themselves when you’re in an environment that has to look out for each other. I don’t doubt our people here will be able to put them in their place, don’t worry. “

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow giggled, half because what Lux said was funny, but the other half because she thought she would be genuinely good at it. She was a natural comforter, at least Snow thought so. “I’ll go and give you a reference right now. I’ll even put on my professional voice and pretend that I’m super mature and smart” She said with a smile, putting on a deeper, more husky voice to sound older. She didn’t know how old Lux was, but she thought that there must have only been a year or two between them, she was probably the same age as her brother, but she was so vastly different from both of them. “Well, as long as they don’t boss me about like they used to. I don’t really need anyone to hold my hand anymore. I just...do what I think I need to. I go training everyday and I’m always on time. Then I go and help out whoever wants me to and then I take Toad for a walk on the road. All by myself. So they’ll see that they were wrong to call me a baby. What were you like before all of this? Did you do all of your computer stuff? Did you hang out with your friends? What about your brother? I still haven’t met him yet...Sorry I’m asking too many questions again”

[luxxyoung-blog]

Lux listened, not saying a word or interrupting Snow as she opened up to her.  She’s been struck by tragedy, something neither she or anyone else had control over. But that only meant the fact she had gotten this far was incredible. “Snow, what happened to you..is horrible. But don’t you see how far you’ve gotten? You’ve survived all of this, you’re walking up to people and you learned how to survive. And you’re not different, okay? Life just threw a few more stones into your path, but that only makes you stronger. You’re incredibly strong, not different in a negative way. Don’t let your past define you or some stupid sickness.” She reached out to rest her hand on Snow’s, squeezing it tightly. “The group you were stuck with actually sounds pretty awful. What is your brother like? You two had a good relationship?”

[snowxbishop-blog]

Nodding lightly to Lux’s words of encouragement, Snow started to feel a lot better. She had made it this far, with a lot of help, but her constant need to prove herself worthy was what had driven her. Showing people that she could make something over herself. She smiled as Lux squeezed her hand. “You’re really good at talking to people. I haven’t talked like this with someone in a really long time.” She let out a sigh as she thought of her group. They weren’t nice to her, but they respected her brother enough to keep her safe. “They were mean. They were all my brothers friends, and he kinda forced them to take me along when they decided to run. He was...not very nice, growing up. He was cool and popular and they all used to call me names and cause trouble for me. But then, when everything went bad, he made sure I was safe. If they all come back for me...I don’t think I’d want to leave. I’d want Mylo to stay, he’d be safe here, but not the others. They only care about themselves.”

[luxxyoung-blog]

 “Well, I didn’t say you should ask them to force people to like you. But you’d be surprised how fast people would stop picking on you once someone bigger tells them to stop that crap. And Travis would probably enjoy seeing their scared little faces. It’s a win win situation.” She tried to lighten the mood up a little, hands running through Toad’s fur as she smiled at Snow. “What do you mean by that? Is ..it a mental disorder or just..you feeling different? “ A lot of people probably enjoyed Toad’s company more than they’d admit. The dog had something calm and familiar. Especially for those that had lost their dogs along the way. “He’s a good dog. Where did you find him? “

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow laughed a little at her comment, it would be nice to show everyone that some people were on her side, that she was accepted by people. Snow shuffled a little in her seat a little, feeling uncomfortable talking about the topic. She had always been told never to talk about what happened, it had caused a scandal in the medical world and the Bishop’s lawyers had managed to pay off the press and stop printing stories about it as quickly as they could. “I got sick, with a new kind of flu that they didn’t know much about. My dad’s company were working on a cure, and he told the doctors to give me the medicine, even though they hadn’t tested it properly yet. I got better...but I stopped being able to learn. My grades dropped all the way down, I couldn’t concentrate, I got upset for no reason, I couldn’t talk to people...” Snow stopped herself, hating remembering all the things she used to be able to do but no longer could. She quickly wiped away a stray tear that rolled down her cheek. “Umm, somewhere along the road, I don’t remember where exactly. We walked all the way from Miami, it was really bad over there. I found Toad under a car, he was so frightened, so I took him with me. Everyone else in the group hated him, but Mylo let me keep him. Everyone loved Mylo”

[luxxyoung-blog]

It was pretty obvious that Snow was having quite a hard time, for which Lux couldn’t blame her. Everyone else around her just…dealt with the past events poorly. Or maybe it was fair to say she joined them during rough times. A small smile tugged on Lux’ face at the comment about squirrels and she scooted over to leave some space for Snow to sit down. “I can imagine. Squirrels are just…not exactly something you’d ever wish to eat on a daily base.” She put the laptop aside, fully turning her body towards Snow as she listened to her. And she’d be lying if she didn’t feel bad for the young girl. They were all in the same situation after all. “I don’t think it’s something about you. The hospital has been getting..a lot more hostile towards new people they don’t know. We were attacked by strangers only days before you joined. Good people died. They’re just scared. Which doesn’t make it okay for anyone to treat you poorly. Have you told anyone about this? Your trainer? The guards? Os, Travis? You know, if you need someone to talk the Tech room is usually pretty empty. I know what it’s like to feel like you don’t belong somewhere. It sucks. You start to believe there’s something wrong with you, that you’re all alone…you never are.” She said warmly as she dropped her gaze towards Toad again, chuckling softly. “If we could just see the world out of his eyes…that’d be so much easier, hm?”

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow sat down next to Lux, smiling shyly at her. She listened carefully as she spoke, trying to take everything in. Snow didn’t know who to talk to about it, she was the one who had come in out of nowhere, she didn’t feel she had the right to complain about anything. Shaking her head, she said “No, I haven’t talked to anyone. Oscar just tells me to go play somewhere, like I’m a little kid or something, and Travis...well Travis is really nice to me, the nicest out of everyone, he’s really taking good care of me, but... I don’t want to get anybody in trouble. I don’t want to force people to like them because then they’ll resent me even more, does that make sense?” She paused for a second, looking down at the knitted hands, trying not to get upset, “But there is something wrong with me. My brain doesn’t work like everyone elses does. I might not be very smart, but I know that I’m different. I was just fine until I was 10 and then...everything stopped working the way it should”. She looked down at Toad, handing him his ragged teddy for him to chew on, before saying, “Dogs forgive and love everyone. Whoever had him before me could have treated him so badly, and yet he still has so much love to give. I try to be like him”

[luxxyoung-blog]

Lux slowly pulled the earphones out of her ears, plopped the devices down onto the top of the closed laptop and turned around to Snow. She hadn’t seen the other girl around much, only caught glimpses of her trying to help out where she could and honestly, that was the best way to get involved with people here. “Just…work stuff. You know, cryptics, analyzing, it’s..boring stuff. — Anyway. How are you doing? How’s everything, living here..the people You getting along well?” Being new somewhere was always hard and the whole hospital was obviously not as ..open and welcoming as they used to be. Lux held out a hand as Toad got closer, smiling at the dog as she hesitantly scratched the dogs chin. 

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow nodded along to Lux describing what she was doing, even though she had no idea what those things meant. She let out a soft hum as she thought about how to answer. It was an amazing place, the safety, the walls, food everyday, but she felt like such an outsider. She wondered if when her brother came if he would want to stay or whether they would leave. “I’m doing pretty good. It’s nice not having to eat squirrels everyday” she said, laughing uncomfortably. Snow shrugged, pursing her lips slightly as she did so. “The people... are ok I guess. No one really talks to me or anything. Or they pick me on. I try and help out but most of the time they tell me to do jobs away from everybody else. But I’m training everyday, which is cool, even though it’s really hard and I get yelled at sometimes. Do...people think I’m bad? Or is it just ‘cause people never really like me?” she asked shyly. Snow wanted to feel included, like part of the group, but other people seemed to make it clear they didn’t want her around. She smiled as Lux pet Toad, saying “He likes it here a lot. He loves everyone”

[luxxyoung-blog]

Headphones plugged in, Lux had taken some time off the crowd that usually assembled for dinner and taken her laptop outside. With people panicking about the virus that was quickly spreading inside their walls, she just needed some fresh air to check all the security cameras for any signs of …well, anything. The attackers, the kidnappings, the people that had gone missing and all of sudden shown up again. So far, aside from some weird, disrupted signals every now and then, there was nothing. Either someone had found out about the dead spots of the cameras…or manipulated the footage. Music was loudly blasting through her headphones, making it nearly impossible for her to hear anything. Only as a large shadow fell on her laptop did she jump up slightly and nearly rip her headphones out. “Jesus fucking christ — you nearly scared the shit out of me. Sneaking up on people is…well fucking not cool.” She said before she even turned around, quickly closing her laptop to shield it from any unwanted eyes. 

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow ate her dinner quickly and retreated outside, like she always did. She hated being inside, there were too many people and not many people liked talking to her. She understood why, she’d been told it for most of her life, that she was weird and asked too many questions. As she walked out, holding the ragged teddy Astrid had given to Toad, she spotted Lux hunching over. As she got closer, she could see she was using a laptop, a strange sight. Snow practically jumped out of her skin when Lux spoke up. “I didn’t mean to sneak up. I was just walking outside, I hate it inside, and then I saw you and I didn’t know what you were looking at so I just walked over and...” Snow stopped before she began repeating herself. She knitted her hands around the toy in her hands nervously and said “What’cha doing? I haven’t seen a laptop in a really long time. It’s kinda cool that you have one”

[itsjustastrid-blog]

Snow was like a little child. Always asking question. Very curious. It was quite cute actually. “Oh ya know, the usual stuff. Some water, a few clothing bits. I found this which I thought Toad might like” Handing over a ragged old teddie. Snow started questioning about her sword.. “Yeah this is very dear to me, my father gave it to me on my 27th birthday, just before he passed” She said as she placed it down. “You went to Tokyo? Wow, that must of of been an experience. You and my dad would of got on like a house on fire” She smiled.” Astrid put the cover over the sword so Snow wouldn’t cut herself and handed it over “ Just be careful because it’s heavy for a sword” She said as she placed it on the palms of her hand “Firm grip now” As she let go of the sword

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow took the teddy, giving Astrid a warm smile. She was overjoyed that someone had thought of her and Toad. Even though it wasn’t much, the kindness this act showed warmed Snows heart. She whispered a soft “Thank you” and she gave Toad the toy, which he held in his mouth delicately. “Yeah, I went there a lot, my mom and dad’s business had offices over there so me and my brother used to go with them during school breaks. It was my favorite place to go out of everywhere, all the girls loved cartoons and pretty dresses and stuff.” Snow grabbed the sword and held with both hands at arms length, slightly scared by holding the weapon. “You-you, should probably take this back. I don’t think I’m very safe holding it. I can be too clumsy sometimes.”

[snowxbishop-blog]

[dailypoldark]

[itsjustastrid-blog]

Dusk was just settling and the evening chill set. Astrid was just finishing doing her supply run, when she was counting and making sure she got everything she needed when she heard her name being called “Astrid!” she looked up to see Snow running towards her with Toad. Astrid rolled her eyes and continued to walk towards her. Snow seemed to really like Astrid, she didn’t know why. Astrid always thought she wasn’t a likable person but there was something that Snow really liked about her.  “Hey Snow” She said as they walked together. “What are you doing out here at this time of night?” She questioned 

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow skipped next to Astrid and her long strides. Shrugging, she said “Toad needed a walk, and dinner isn’t ready yet. I’ve been training all day, trying to get tough. What have you been doing? Finding good stuff?” Snow was fascinated by Astrid. She was scared of her at first, she had a stony exterior, Snow felt like she had something deeply caring inside of her that she was drawn to. She felt like she wanted to be like Astrid. Looking at her intently, she spotted her sword hooked on her shoulder. “Your sword! It looks so cool! I saw swords like that in Tokyo, samurais used them, right? I can I see it?”

[travisxsmith-deactivated2016042]

“Alright, you do that. Go back and stay there with Toad. I’ll ask around about what’s going on, and let you know later on. There’s no need for panic of being afraid, surely whatever is happening is already being taken under control.”he mumbled, placing his hand on the side of her arm, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Trust me, okay? You’ll be fine.”

[snowxbishop-blog]

Snow wiped her nose with the back of her hand, and nodded quickly along with Travis’ words. “Ok, I trust you”, she said meekly, blushing slightly as Travis touched her arm. Snow ran to her room, sliding between people who gave her questioning looks. When she got up there, Toad was sat on his blanket next to the bed, and Snow lay down beside him, pulling him closely.

[snowxbishop-blog]

@itsjustastrid

It was early evening. Dinner wasn’t for another hour, the sun wasn’t quite setting, but the nighttime chill was just setting it. It wasn’t cold, but the breeze gave a chilling refreshment after a day of training. Toad had been tied up for most of the day, but Snow knew that some people liked to take him on little walks around the grounds or give him little treats. She thought that people liked him more than they liked her, but to be fair, she liked Toad a lot more than she like most people, too. 

Snow took Toad for a walk on the road between the Base and the Hospital, throwing sticks for him and playing about. She never ventured too far away from the hospital, never quite onto the grounds of the base. Being on her own still scared her, she didn’t like being to far away from another person in case something happened. Snow could hear some light chattering in the distance. Her body tensed up, and she began shuffling backwards, eyes wide, ready to sprint back to the hospital. Toad barked ferociously as he sensed Snow’s unease, and she tried to hush him, not wanting to attract attention. As the voices became clearer and closer, she spotted a face she recognized and began to skip over to her. “Astrid!”