caffeinated

🇳🇿 | usually hyperfixating on something

[quasi-normalcy]

I'm just saying, "We created a computer to make decisions for us, but it assimilated all of the bias that was implicit in the dataset and now makes incredibly racist decisions that we don't question because computers are logical and don't make mistakes" literally sounds like a planet-of-the-week morality play on the original Star Trek.

[butterflypeaflowertea]

glasses are obsessed with collecting grime… it’s their passion and hobby

[darkmaga-retard]

[ladyshinga]

[maplebunie]

[1percentcharge]

My favorite pirate joke is “why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they spend years at c” not because it’s THAT funny but because it’s a relatively simple joke that nobody ive told it to has ever correctly guessed the punchline for because they all think it’s gonna be a joke about arrrr

[1percentcharge]

Another classic is

“Why couldn’t the pirates play cards? Because the captain was standing on the deck!”

For more hilarious pirate jokes like these go to google and type pirate jokes into the search bar and click search

[somarysueme]

Sorry for the double reblog I just wanted to let everyone know that I told the first joke to my dad and he hung up on me.

[intercal]

I'm so mentally stable you can park a horse in my brain

[vampireopossum]

[piano-hoarder-deactivated202602]

Dalinar writing Oathbringer

Jasnah: Uncle, a good scholar always cites their sources, for the benefit of the reader and other scholars.

Dalinar:

Dalinar:

[catchymemes]

Find the odd one

[catsbeaversandducks]

By JoJo

[yesterdaysprint]

The Daily Times, New Philadelphia, Ohio, July 9, 1924

[thank-you-everyone-deactivated2]

whoever wrote this paper has the funniest phrasing possible

[the-wave-finally-broke]

happy turtle bit off a cop’s toe in the hudson river day for those who celebrate

[utah-mountain-drifter-deactivat]

[abysswarlock]

[northisnotup]

[14sinsphotography]

[sexysilverstrider]

the group chat when i ask whos available to hang out next week

[medusasstory]

Honestly this is one of the best formatted jokes of all time.

[depsidase]

[imsobadatnicknames2]

"Rail only works over short distances" one of the most detached from reality carbrain statements I've ever read. Rail is objectively, demonstrably better to cover long distances than it is to cover short distances. Car culture legitimately gives you some kind of brain fungus.

[baiyubai]

and then they get in trouble

[o-kurwa]

[officialfist]

Unrestrained summer fun

[gothiccharmschool]

This is strangely soothing.

[mandaloriandragontrainer]

Wendy Rush, the wife of missing OceanGate CEO and submersible pilot, is the great-great granddaughter of German-Jewish couple Isidor and Ida Straus, who died in the original Titanic disaster. Isidor, a US congressman and co-owner of Macy’s department store, was among the most wealthy men on board. However, when offered a seat on a lifeboat, Isidor declined, not willing to take space from women and children. Ida refused to leave her husband, and reportedly wrapped her maid in her own fur coat before placing her in the lifeboat. The two were last seen seated on the deck, holding hands. The elderly couple famously depicted in the 1997 film holding each other in bed as their room floods were based off Isidor and Ida.