A compilation of things I have said while playing the Thousand Year Door Remake and talking to myself:
“THE THOUSAND YEAR DOOOOR! THE THOUSAND YEAR DOOR IS REEEEAAAAAAL
“Gay. Gay. Homosexual. Gay.”
“I found the peach fankoopa and my mind’s eye gave him comic book guy’s voice”
“How does Koops’ hoodie work with his shell?”
“NAKED GRANDMA!” (During the thwomp quiz)
“I can defend Goombas having hair. Mushrooms can have hairlike features (see Lion’s Mane mushrooms). Mushrooms also have mycelium which is threadlike and can be compared to hair. Goombas are also mushrooms and therefore more related to animals than plants. Conclusion; goombas are mammalian. How koopa hair?”
“I don’t like Ms Mowz height compared to Mario especially during the kiss”
“What is my purpose” “You simp for a human” “Oh my god.”
“Oh my god I just remembered the most lovely animated game grumps moment”
“To egg or not to egg. That is the question.”
“A thought has occurred to me that the hair on koopas is probably more like thin spines that resemble hair, possibly being like quills on a porcupine (used to administer poison to something that tries to grab it). Or potentially because reptiles and birds are so similar (this is also true of Koopas given some can be born with wings) their hair is more like feathers that are thin enough to resemble hair”
“I just think baby yoshi with down feathers to keep warm is adorable “
“Also met Flurry and my mind’s eye gave her Rarity’s voice”
“This tree is NOT osha regulated”
“…who’s gonna tell bowser that this isn’t princess peach-“
“That’s not very cash money of you, Kammy.”
“Who do ya need me to kill?”
Flurry expresses uncertainty. “I’m liking the sound of this, who do we have to kill?”
“This is the ugliest room I have ever seen, my eyes are bleeding”
“I just realized that this is Rock Hawk’s locker room. thERE IS CARPET IN IT! NOOOO”
“Have to pick between Kringus or Child Soldier for Yoshi Name”
“I went with C.S. Short for Child Soldier”
“I don’t trust this fedora wearing goon. I know his secret already it’s a matter of the characters learn it”
“He just blatantly admitted to cheating in front of a massive audience, cameras and probably the entire world.”
Chapter 4 (favorite so far)
“I barely started and the people being turned into pigs is genuinely freaking me out”
And I’m also sad because I gave a mother a peach item so she can feed her children because she can’t afford food. And then she turned into a pig. I’m freaked out.”
“That Doopliss bastard is going to pay for his mass mutilation.”
“Doopliss your prank idea sucks and you don’t know what irony means. Irony would be them being constantly gloomy but then being horrifyingly happy to an unnerving degree”
“Thanks goombella. I saved your mycelium skin from creeps. Thanks, Koops, I literally saved your dad. Thanks, Flurrie, I returned your prized necklace. Thanks, Child Soldier, I RAISED YOU!”
“I do love how his thumbs up could just be a weird middle finger”
The game letting me name Doopliss “BASTARD” and “Cunt”
“But god crow conversation is dull.”
“I know the smart idea is to just leave but I can never pass up the chance to call Doopliss a plank”
Side note, I am American, I just think Plank is a funny insult.
“Professor Frankly you’re not supposed to break the fourth wall.”
“‘By default! My favorite way to win!’ -Luigi Mario, 2004, probably”
*whisper* “i know who you aaaare.”
“My wife died while I was on a voyage.” “That’s rough, buddy.”
“Flavio… bro. S.S. means Steam Ship.”
*me doing my best peter griffin impression* “ghosts”
“Mario like ‘mama fucker. I forgot my extensive duct tape and cling wrap collection. If we’re hungry enough we eat Flavio first.’”
“I told you lot to kill and butcher flavio for when we’re starving. Now he’s picking fights?!”
“That was the plan, Moinseur Deficit!”
“I hit the whacka and I’m wondering if I killed him-“
“Hey, you, you’re finally awake”
“We hate you too, Flavio.”
“I gotta eat the science dude that’s a bad”
“Oh no, Hayzee what did Mr. Bottom Bunk’s clumsiness do to you?”
“Honestly Luigi, I think Grass was the role safest for everyone involved-“
“boy I love getting caught up with the mafia in my family friendly mario games”
“When did you become british??”
“Have you ALWAYS been British??”
“That’s a terrible name. How about ‘Soup’s Fucked?’”
“Now back to my hunch! Hmmmmmmm”
“More like ace defective.”
“At the risk of immodesty you look quite ‘kick the baby’ shaped”
“Alright, Shuichi Saiharain’t”
Expect a reblod with more statements of varying degrees of humor.
amandla
gamechangershow
turnnoffyourmind
romaincrisis
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