Spatort incorrect quotes

Used to just be Brooklyn 99 quotes but then I ran out

[spatort99]

Esther: Ask me why I love you

Pia: Why do you love me?

*Esther pulls up a 200-slide PowerPoint presentation*

Esther: I'm glad you asked...

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Adam: Do you want me to just kill him?

Leo: ... That's a joke, right?

Adam: Depends how you feel about it

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Esther: As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I'm totally flexible

[pheita]

I know we are all used to hear bad news from the USA or UK when it comes to trans rights but this time Germany wants to play in the same league.

Our idiots at home ministry came up with the fucking idea to start a register for all transgender and nonbinary people which would mean every person working at some public position could always at any given time see your assigned gender at birth, your deadname, your address and who knows what else.

We had been there in the past. Hitler Germany called it the "Travestite Law" back then. Our politicians didn't learn.

We all know this is unacceptable.

Please, if you are German, sign it. If you are not, spread it wide and far.

This had been stopped once a few years ago. It needs to be stopped again.

Kein Sonderregister für trans* Personen – Nie wieder Listen gegen Minderheiten!

Hallo, ich bin Penelope Alva Frank, Transfrau, queerfeministische Aktivistin und Gründerin der queerfeministischen Bewegung Queermany. Ich w

[spatort99]

*Leo waking up post EdN*

Esther: How much do you remember?

Leo: Not much, just the ambulance ride to the hospital

Esther: There was no ambulance, I drove you

Leo: But I heard a siren...

Pia: That was Adam

Adam: I was worried!

[spatort]

Tatort Saarbrücken Text Posts Vol. 3

[queercowboyinspace]

you’re always gonna be someone that I want

[spatort99]

Esther: Where's Schürk?

Leo: What, you think I have him micro-chipped or something?

Esther: Well do you?

Leo: ...

Leo: Yeah hang on...

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Pia: Honey, it's really muggy out today

Esther: If I go outside and all our mugs are on the front lawn, I'm leaving you

Pia: *sips coffee from a bowl*

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Adam: I want to wake up with you every morning for the rest of our lives

Leo: I wake up at 5:30

Adam...I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives

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Pia: Wait...did you just flirt with me?

Esther: Have been for the past year but thanks for noticing

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Pia: Just be yourself, say something nice

Adam: Which one I can't do both

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Leo: Esther, keep an eye on Adam today. He's going to say something to the wrong person and get himself punched

Esther: Sure, I'd love to see Schürk get punched

Leo: Try again

Esther, sighing: I will stop Schürk from getting punched

[spatort99]

Esther: Truth or dare?

Pia: Truth

Esther: How many hours did you sleep last night?

Pia: ...Dare

Esther: Go to bed

Pia: I don't like this game

[spatort99]

Adam: We have a problem

Leo: No, you have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them

[spatort99]

Spatort as Brooklyn 99 quotes:

Adam: I've decided to stop fighting it and lean into the fact that I'm an idiot

[spatort99]

Spatort as Brooklyn 99 quotes:

Dino: I once sold a man a fake Pekingese. T'was a cat.

Pia: You will not win me over with your use of the word t'was

Dino: T'wasnt trying to