Milk Enjoyer @sqebu - Tumblr Blog

Intro/Information

This is my art blog where I also overshare about the ongoing nonsense in my life. Currently in my evil Native bisexual femdom era tbh. Sorry to anyone who followed for soft and fluffy Indigenous lesbians.

My carrd

#new pinned. yeah.#I actually just posted this by accident #but it is true and does the job

Hiatus ending soon because I downloaded Clip Studio Paint and enjoy drawing again. THUMBS UP

The longer I stayed away from creating the more I realized I had to do it in order for the stories I want to exist, sadly. SOMEONE has to be drawing jacked disordered Native woman art.

#ignore her whitewashed skin it's the screen #Idk if anyone missed me but I'm BACK HESITANTLY #I had to get a new therapist and reunite with my lover and watch shows and movies and get back to the gym and accept my chronic pain life #and that means giving up procreate........but I didn't like SAI anymore....so I found myself hating making digital art for a while #Also sometimes I just need a social media break. I was getting maybe too personal on here.#N #2026

In case it wasn't evident, I am on some sort of hiatus here due to my health + focusing on another project during my art time.

Mostly I just have a lot of fatigue after work due to anemia/chronic pain, and when I do have energy I've been enjoying exercise and events outdoors (aside from the past few weeks because of forest fire air).

I'll probably return once winter hits and I settle my health some more. Thanks!

#it's honestly not the worst since drawing has been my main coping mechanism my whole life #the more productive I am with it the more suicidal I am guaranteed #if I never draw I am also suicidal though so it's a balance lmao #other project is a SECRET btw #sqebu not drawing

Severe saviour complex to the point I wish to be a guardian angel.

#getting below 6 hrs of sleep will have me feeling guilty I wasn't there for my partner to save them at birth #I was a child actively being traumatized also mind you BUT STILL #so much love so much pain #sqebu not drawing

HUGE PEEPERS

#I tried to upload this with a recording but it failed so just look at him instead #original character #digital art #r #2025

Glad I started to keep a diary of my issues because I have been afraid of the exact same scenario playing out for the exact same reasons since November (likely earlier) and it just hasn't happened. I should have been doing this all along, it's so embarrassing.

I recommend it if you lack emotional permanence.

#I may not have burned down things in the past if I had this perspective #IT STILL FEELS VERY REAL #but historical and repeated evidence to the contrary is nice #sqebu not drawing

Warmup......I love you evil, manipulative, controlling woman.....I love youuee

#my rewatch continues #first drawing of her in a decade I'd say #adventure time #princess bubblegum #fanart

Okay so it turns out everything I do with my hands upsets my nerve impingement except drawing, which is hilarious.

This is great news but tbh my posture while drawing is awful. So I think I've just trained my muscles to operate at their peak in a very specific position due to years of compulsively making images of my stupid little imaginary friends.

#I avoided it for months and to what end #sqebu not drawing #SQEBU DRAWING ACKSHUALLY

I love that so many people are making OCs that are just stinky losers these days.

#everyone make more they're hot #sqebu not drawing

Nats to knock off some rust.

#update my nerves are still fucked but avoiding drawing just made me more mentally ill #so I continue #original character #N #2025

For those keeping up at all, I likely have some sort of thoracic outlet syndrome resulting from a shoulder injury 4 years ago + my weird skeleton. And also nerve impingement because I sit wrong and have hip hypermobility. So.

Basically doing anything I enjoy (or my entire job) outside of walking makes me hurt and/or makes my hand numb.

#chronic pain era (pretending I haven't been in pain since 2021)#makes me wonder if I have an underlying problem but I don't want to think too hard on it #if only it was my left hand instead sobs #if my posture is perfect I can draw #this sucks :/#sqebu not drawing

Sorry for not drawing all I do is sleep and look at spreadsheets and go on walks until it hurts my fragile poisoned body.

#one week and two days left of my Evil Pills that trade clear skin for months of depression and pain #any motivation I have must be used for work and basic health unfortunately #sqebu not drawing

Strangers treat me better when I dress masc. Why.

#you'd think they'd get homophobic but they enjoy my boyish charms instead #NO IDEA what social mechanism is behind this #I'm AFAB for anyone who doesn't know #maybe it just suits me better idk #sqebu not drawing

Tragic! Woman is left with her father's dysfunctional pattern of emotions and her mother's toxic techniques to deal with them.

#sqebu not drawing

In furs

#this is like a year late #anyway I'm back in action somewhat #N #original character #2025

Can't wait to be off accutane so I can have clear skin AND be less mentally ill.

#I forget how it feels to have energy and enjoy things more than once or twice a week #this summer I'll be unstoppable #also it will help my injury heal #to be off the stuff #sqebu not drawing

Jeans.

#digital art #2025 #idk how to tag things that aren't my stupid ass OCs #illustration

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