my train of thought destroyed
jason todd's three bs- back, biceps and brain!
playing | second nature- clairo
Honestly, the sight should be illegal.
After a long, tiring day of classes and running all over Gotham, you finally finished all your remaining assignments and errands to complete. To give yourself a tap on your shoulder from the hard work, you decided to get a fun dinner to take home to the safety of your apartment, where your boyfriend was waiting for you as he left his job just a little while before you were done.
Meddling with the keys, you managed to open the door and automatically went to leave the stuff you were carrying on top of the kitchen’s island, talking into the silence of the home as you began to explain how your day was. Still moving around to set down all of your bags from the day, you barely glanced at the man lying on your couch who was looking at you with his full attention diverted towards your actions since you arrived.
When you started to explain a more dramatic part of your day, you turned towards him for the first time since you entered, and you finally got to take a good look at him, action that left you very much flabbergasted, all thoughts running from your head as you stared at him.
Jason was just laying on the couch, perched in a way that should definitely be uncomfortable for anyone, but he kept insisting that it was perfect to support his back and neck. He was shirtless, muscles on his upper back moving as his head turned to keep you in his sights constantly as you moved with precision all over the place.
On top of his sweatpants, a book was lying there with his bookmark in the middle, possible from when you entered the room and he diverted his attention to you. He had a calm, easy expression on his face, not a full-blown smile but also not the tense furrow in his brow whenever he left the confines of your apartment. His hair was a bit tousled, as if he had been tangling it involuntarily and tried to fix it once he realised what he was doing.
You were a bit flustered in the middle of the living room in front of him, at which he just beckoned you forward until you stood in front of him. From there, you could see his muscles even better, now appreciating how slivers of the setting daylight found themselves lying on top of his shoulders and upper chest. He seemed to relish the feeling, curling towards those hints of sun as you cat did, who was also near those sparse rays sprawled across his abdomen, purring loudly.
He was now smiling softly as his hands entwined with yours, pressing a kiss to your knuckles as you melted internally at his affections. Looking at each other in fondness, you properly greeted each other with muttered “Hi baby”s and “Hey sweetgeart”s while he sat up, moving both the book which you now realised was one of your favourites, and your cat to the side to focus on you.
His arms rippled and moved as he began stretching a bit to dull the ache in his joints, and you used the occasion to shamelessly stare at him before you began to dote on each other.
You could appreciate clearly how hard he worked on his physique, a young teenager once filled with anger who re-focused it on getting stronger became what is now a wall of safety for you, his family and friends and anyone who needed help. His back and arms were littered with scars, some fading, some bigger that hurted when it got colder, and some other with backstories he feared to remember.
Nonetheless, there he stood, shoulders as big as your head creaking and groaning as he moved them over his head and to the sides, and in that latter position, his ridiculously huge arms spread out wide too. A funny fact you found out recently is that your cat also adored Jason’s biceps, as she also rested her head over the top of the big muscle while she cuddled up to both of you, mimicking her owner, aka, you.
His back looked a bit tight from the position, and you made a mental note to give him a gentle rub later, totally not using the opportunity to touch and admire his back in any way shape or form you could imagine. Sometimes, when he finished a workout and came home directly after instead of going to back to work, you swear you could see every individual muscle move as he made tea for you, also shirtless (you both knew what he was doing; neither said anything).
But being realistically, you also admired how his brain worked. He was so smart and so sharp in a way that never let you feel small of dumb that it got attractive over time: yes, you never thought he wasn’t intelligent, but seeing him solve a case Dick struggled with over a simple phone call with the younger one where he just figured it out instantly and gave him the following steps was still one of the hottest things he’d done.
Jason finally stood up and engulfed you with those muscles you were just daydreaming about and laid his forehead in the crook of your neck, sighing deeply as he tried to pull you closer to him. You also used the occasion to gently glide your nails over his back knowing how much he adored the feeling, and he shivered gently at the movements, never pulling away for a second.
Now feeling instantly recharged, he returned to his standing position, his hands moving to grab your waist as you kept shamelessly admiring his body. “Hey, sweetheart, eyes up here” he called over, bemused at the situation. “Hmm, but I don’t know where to look at. Like, yes, you are so face-attractive but goddamn, I come home to this every night and you have a proper personality and I know I sound like a fangirl right now but I don’t care, let me love on you a bit, you always do so for me either way” you replied with an amused glint in you eyes.
Grabbing tighter onto your waist as he smiled with a wicked grin plastered on his face, you could see the gears turning in his head as he quickly maneuvered to grab onto your tights and back to carry you bridal style. Letting out a silly noise and giggles in surprise, you were smiling widely as he looked at you and kissed you softly, moving you over to where he was before.
Caging you with his body, he laid you down gently on the couch and he finally rested his body on top of your, making sure that the position was comfortable and he wasn’t crushing you down. Your cat made her presence known again as she lazily stretched too from the corner where she was dozed off, and she paraded her way onto Jason’s exposed back, purring once again. Moving your hands to rest near her, you went back to scratching softly the area as your boyfriend melted deeper into you.
every time you make The Character a dom when they shouldnt be, every time you make that guy a daddy dom sadist when the canon does not support it whatsoever, i throw an innocent puppy into my incinerator. is your cliche porn worth it? think about that
and every time you make the character prematurely ejaculate or have erectile dysfunction or be generally bad at sex in some way a puppy is pulled back from the fire and tenderly cared for. Together. we can save them
normal people: I am from Russia/Brazil/Italy/Australia/etc :)
Americans, assuming studying the specific geography of their country was ever relevant to me: Oh I was born in iower but went to school in Oregano (My parents come from East Carolina though):~)
One day I was eating at a restaurant in Peru with the 3 guys who were volunteering with me and someone asked us where we came from. So I said France, the German guy said Germany, the Maltese guy had to say Italy because almost no-one in Peru knows where Malta is, and then the American guy said Portland, like he didn’t even specify the state he just thought everyone knew where Portland is 😤
american: wait what lol i don’t speak mexican i only speak english
and
european: where are you from?
american: (monolingual english speaker, white, never left Marietta, GA in 23 years of life) well i’m 1/5th irish, 1/7th german, 32% greek, 4/9ths native american, 1/12th swedish, a little bit filipino, my mother was a hamster and my father smelt of elderberries, but i just call myself african :)
The American comments on this post are so irritating. I think that some of them don’t realise that the USA is just a country while Europe is a continent made up of different countries where you can find different religions, different autochthonous ethnicities, different languages etc; You can’t compare a single country’s diversity to the diversity of an entire continent.
“But Texas is so different from Oregon! People need to know which state I’m from because they’re all so different!” We don’t care. We are going to see you as an American, not as a Texan or a Californian or whatever, just like you’re going to see someone from Bavaria as a German, someone from Normandy as a Frenchman or someone from Piedmont as an Italian, not as a Bavarian, a Norman and a Piedmontese. European countries have regional differences too, even more than US states yet we don’t feel the need to specify that to foreigners when they ask us where we’re from unless they ask us to elaborate.
“But the US is so big! Some of our states are even bigger than your countries!”
Russia is the largest country in the world and undoubtedly more diverse than the US. If you were to ask a Russian where they’re from they would say that they’re from Russia, not Komi or Tuva unless they’re speaking to another Russian or someone they know to be familiar with Russian geography.
You’re not special nor does the world revolve around you, just accept that and move on.
Miss is dating a rich guy // Dick Grayson x teacher!reader
— After a trip with your senior students, you accept their following requests on instagram, and they find out their favorite teacher is dating the hottest Wayne boy.
!!: 1k celebration — Ice Cream Order!! smau + a narrated part. fluff. fem!reader. Pictures are from Pinterest. The students are OCs.
[dc masterlist]
bludhavenhighschool
liked by yourusername and 203 more
Our senior students have traveled to Paris for two weeks with their favorite teachers before starting their last semester!!
comments:
mylove_mary best trip everrr!!!
bianca13 what happens in Paris stays in Paris 🤭
lucas007 had the best time with our chem teacher
⤷ katy_smith we love you @/yourusername ❤️
⤷ maxwillson you're the best @/yourusername
yourusername 🔒
liked by dickgrayson and 78 more
Paris with my annoying students 🥐
comments:
katy_smith I feel so honored miss accepted my following request
⤷ tatianaaaa she accepted all of us, you're not special
⤷ yourusername you're one second away of being kicked out Tatiana
⤷ cooper.peter dayumm miss
lucas007 come on miss don't lie we're not annoying
⤷ maxwillson that's right and you love us
⤷ yourusername do I???
bianca13 we love you miss, thank you for coming with us 🫶🏻 ♥︎ liked by the author
dickgrayson glad you had a great time my love ♥︎ liked by the author
⤷ mylove_mary MISS HAS A BOYFRIEND????
⤷ faryhannah where have I heard his name before?
yourusername has posted a story:
direct messages:
yourusername 🔒
liked by dickgrayson and 81 more
Since you all (my beloved students) were wondering what my mystery plans for yesterday night were, here you have it
comments:
dickgrayson you looked stunning babe ❤️
⤷ yourusername love you 💋
lucas007 miss if I pass this exam would you ditch your boyfriend and date me?
⤷ yourusername Lucas, you haven't passed any of my exams since the start of the school year
⤷ lucas007 but what if I surprise you in this one
⤷ yourusername I doubt it because I saw you and Max cheating
⤷ maxwillson hey that's not true!
⤷ yourusername don't even try to deny it max
tatianaaa where's the dress from miss??
⤷ yourusername I don't know, it was a gift from my boyfriend Tatiana
⤷ dickgrayson it cost 30,000$ btw
faryhannah miss are you secretly rich?
⤷ yourusername I am not hannah
⤷ mylove_mary then your boyfriend is
⤷ dickgrayson kind of
⤷ yourusername dick stop messing with my students
bianca13 you look really pretty miss
⤷ yourusername thank you Bianca 💕
katy_smith miss why where you in the Wayne Gala?
⤷ yourusername fulfill my duty as a girlfriend
⤷ faryhannah STOP I FINALLY RECOGNIZE THE NAME YOU'RE DATING THE DICK GRAYSON
⤷ dickgrayson the one and only
You knew that your first lesson with your senior students on Monday was going to be a mess. They were going to try and find out every single detail about your relationship with Dick, now that they knew you were dating the son of a billionaire.
The first student to enter your classroom was Lucas, followed by Max. Both of them, instead of taking their assigned seats, walked over to you with a big and confident smile.
“Have you corrected my exam Miss?” Lucas asked, crossing his arms and tilting his head slightly. He looked far too confident, and you knew him all too well. You knew he was going to try and sweet talk you out of his fail, or convince you that he didn’t cheat, even though you saw him looking at his phone.
“Yes, but only yours and Max’s,” you smirked.
“And?” Max joined the conversation.
“You guys failed,” you informed them, with a smile full of satisfaction from your student’s groans.
“But how!?” Lucas dared to ask.
“You guys should already know not to trust Chat GPT. Every single exercise was wrong.”
Max made a defeated sound and turned around to go to his seat. However, Lucas stayed.
“Do you need anything else, Lucas?” You asked calmly.
“Did you fail me because you didn’t want to take my offer of dating me and ditch your rich boyfriend?”
“No. It’s because you cheated and chose the worst way of cheating. Now go to your seat.”
By the time the bell rang, marking the start of the lessons, all your students were on their seats. This calmness and good behaviour from all of them was unusual. They usually would be talking with each other, updating everyone about their weekend, but today they were all silent and focused on you. They wanted something—they wanted you to start talking.
It was not professional to treat your students like friends, and tell them about your personal life—like it was not professional to accept their following request in instagram, but you did that.
You scanned the room. Every girl wore a smirk on their faces, eager to ask you about the gala and your absurdly hot and rich boyfriend. You knew they had been thirsty for gossip since you posted those pictures at the gala on Saturday.
Your hands went to your hips, accepting defeat. “What do you guys want to know?”
Hannah raised her hand, but Tatiana was quicker and more rude, talking before being asked to do so.
“How do you date a rich guy?” The type of question someone like Tatiata would ask. She doesn’t care about you or Dick, she cares about how she could get the exact same thing as you: a rich guy that buys her expensive dresses, and takes her to fancy galas.
“You don’t choose the rich guy, the rich guy chooses you,” you mocked the popular saying, usually used for pets. “Hannah?”
“How did you both meet?” Hannah, you very polite, celebrity obsessed, student asked.
“We met at Blüdhaven’s police station,” you started explaining, with a loving and nostalgic smile on your face. “I went there after a guy stole my purse. Dick had already finished his shift there and was about to head home, but then he saw me and fell in love.”
“That easy?” you heard Mary’s voice from her last row seat.
“Well, yes. He won me over when he said, ‘I was going to ask for your number, but I guess you don’t have one anymore.’ He’s incredible,” you recalled. Dick had been trying to cheer you up that afternoon while you were waiting to report the theft. He’d succeeded, because after all his attempts to make you smile, you finally did—and you accepted his invitation to go out to dinner with him sometime.
“Do you know many celebrities?” This time Bianca asked.
“Not really, no.” The whole class let out a sigh of disappointment. “Oh well, sorry,” you said sarcastically.
“I thought Dick was a model, not a police officer…” Hannah wondered.
“He models sometimes, but that’s not his real job,” you answered, and picked up the white chalk from your desk. “Now, let’s begin with the lesson, shall we?”
You began writing some chemical equations on the board, while you heard your teenagers whispering behind your back. You could hear the girls sharing their liking for your boyfriend and saying how handsome he was. Meanwhile, the boys didn’t care that much, so they went back to their regular conversations about sports.
yourusername 🔒
liked by dickgrayson and 76 more
Life of the rich or whatever
comments:
dickgrayson I love my woman
⤷ yourusername as you should
faryhannah the cutest dog 😭
⤷ tatianaaaa wdym the dog is missing a leg lol
⤷ mylove_mary miss just deleted Tatiana from her followers war is over
bianca13 you guys are the cutest ♥︎ liked by the author
lucas007 I'll wait miss don't worry, I'll always be here
maxwillson I swear I'm studying for the next exam miss
⤷ yourusername I hope this time is true Max
⤷ lucas007 me too miss
⤷ yourusername don't lie to me Lucas
"I can't believe humans would hunt the thylacine to extinction, humans are fundamentally evil" Hey, did you know that extinction was long thought to be impossible, and within 50 years of humans realizing that extinction via overhunting was a possibility it practically stopped happening? Did you know that humans are so desperate to prevent more losses that they're funneling millions of collective hours and billions of euros into helping other species? Hours and euros that could be spent on humans, being spent on species on whom humanity's own survival does not depend? Did you know that due to an accidental introduction of rats, the Lord Howe Island stick insect population was brought down to 24 individuals and now there are tens of thousands of them?
This bug. This bug that, to most humans, is utterly useless, relatively gross, and completely foreign. Humans saved it because humans do not want to cause another extinction ever again if they can avoid it.
A 75 yo man proudly came into the cafe wearing an Ultra Maga hat. I excused my barista from the register to handle the transaction.
"The hat is customizable," he said, struggling with the velcro patch on the front. "If I need it, I have an ICE one too. I pick based off the business i walk into."
"Customizable is an important hat descriptor," I said. "what can I get you?"
"You wouldn't believe how offended people get these days," he said. "And I'm supposed to do something about it if you're offended? You chose to be offended!"
"We all have hundreds of thousands of decisions everyday," I said. I thickened my accent. "That's what my stepdad always said. But I can make one easier - we have a delicious Ethiopian roast available."
"Like if I told you you have a bull ring," he said, "because bulls have rings in their noses. Is that offensive?"
I laughed. "I've heard that before."
"It's a joke, but people get offended. Maybe you're offended."
I looked at him. I smiled. "You aren't trying to offend me though, right?"
Of course he was. I was being friendly and the friendlier I was, the faster he switched topics. He was saying anything inflammatory he could think of to see if I'd take the bait. After about 20 minutes of my redirecting and deescalating, he settled into a more normal interaction. He took up too much of my time showing me a product I'd feigned mild interest in to get him to stop talking about getting accused of inappropriate behavior at work. When we finally disengaged, he spent 10 minutes trying to catch my eye again. When he failed, he left.
There's this new breed of customer who insists on trying to incite political conversation through their clothing and, when that doesnt work, their snide little comments. If I owned my own business, maybe I would have given the guy the fight he wanted. But I work for a corporation and I love paying my bills so I deescalated.
Anyone wearing that type of shit and preying on workers for their own spank bank material is a brainless fucking sheep.
something i want to mention because i’ve seen it growing as a trend online is that not only do people do this just for their own gratification, but watch for glasses. smart glasses are a growing segment of the consumer market, and creeps like this are harassing people in public in order to gather content without the victims being aware they’re being filmed
hot take comments like "I hope I get cyclosporiasis I want to lose 10 lbs" are not only obvious fatphobia but also part of mass illness normalization that has been an ongoing effort since 2020 to minimize the dangers of disease and infections
They want to act like high levels of sickness whether it be airborne or foodborne are normal and not the responsibility of agencies like public health or food safety regulation so they can get away with dismantling them.
i guess the thing is that when people talk about how e.g. cheating in college doesn't actually matter, there's this implicit assumption that the credentials are worthless. like nobody would say "yeah it's nbd if my airplane pilot bribed their test instructor to let them skip the test, do what you need to do to survive under capitalism" because there's an obvious sense in which a bad pilot will kill you. and obviously not all degrees are safety critical but like, it rarely feels like the conversation about e.g. AI usage on homework gets into that level of nuance?
like okay: kids buying fake drivers licenses get beer is very different from kids buying fake drivers licenses and actually driving with them, right? but if you treat the two as the same thing you're going to get very confused.
𝜗ৎ tags/tw: slice of life, established relationship, pet names, flirting, suggestive language, birthday celebrations, fluffffffff!!!, domestic bliss, not proofread
ও˖ ࣪⊹ pairing: jason todd x f!reader
𝜗ৎ a/n: haaaaaaaappyyyy birthdayyyyyyy tooo meeeer💥🔥💥🔥💥🔥 guyss i was going to post another fic(it was going to be smut) but ive lowk been procrastinating and now im writing whenever im not doing anything, but i hate writing smut when im not in the mood💔💔 i failed you all, apologies (i might post it tomorrow)(bday sex vro)(it was going to be so good)(i say as if i even think im good at writing smut LOL)
Jason didn't like celebrating his birthday that much, but when it came to you, he'd go beyond everything just to show you how much love and appreciation he held for you. He loved to read in between the lines of what you said to make sure he made you feel special on your day, because your whole existence was like a godly essence that graced his presence everyday.
So, unfortunately you had to work on your birthday, but that wasn't much of a setback for Jason. He made sure he had his day off so he could prepare everything for you, the nerves and anticipation of you not liking the day he had prepared were exponentially growing, but he'd just have to trust himself on this.
The first thing he had to do was pick you up from work, he arrived a few minutes early so you wouldn't need to wait for him, and now he was leaning against his car door with a beautiful bouquet of multiple of your favourite flowers.
When he saw you walking up to him, his whole face lit up. You looked tired, but to him it was like the sun was shining down on you, your smile was enough to light up his day.
As soon as you got close to him, Jason wrapped you in a tight hug.
“Happy birthday, sweetheart.”
You took in his comforting fragrance mixed with the smell of leather and smiled into his chest.
“Thank you, Jay. The flowers are beautiful.”
“I knew you'd like them.” You rolled your eyes at his cocky smirk and leaned in for a kiss, which he happily returned.
“How was work?”
“Mm, boring as always. Couldn't wait to leave.”
Jason laughed fondly while caressing your face. “I missed you the whole day. But c’mon we have places to be.”
“Oooo, what did you plan?”
“It's a surprise, baby.” He opened the car door for you and helped you inside.
“So mysterious.”
“You know I love preparing a good surprise for you.”
“And I always love ‘em.”
He smiled at you before softly closing your door and getting into the driver's seat. As he started driving, his hand immediately went to your thigh. You told him about your day and some of the gossip about your co-workers while he listened intently. It didn't take long for you to realise he was taking you to the beach.
“Jay, are we going to the beach?” You asked excitedly.
Jason smiled at you and nodded. “I figured our picnic by the sea while the sun sets was long overdue.”
That made you gasp, that was something you mentioned wanting to do on a random day while almost falling asleep. At the time you thought he didn't pay much mind to it, and since life's been busy you didn't bring it up again. “How do you remember that?”
“I’m amazing at remembering all the things you sleepily mention.”
The sea breeze immediately made you forget all about work and the stress of your week. You always loved Jason's gifts because they weren't something loud and shiny, they represented the quiet moments you two shared and how he always listened to you, no matter the moment.
You two walked hand in hand to the beach where you could spot a picnic towel with some candles, a basket full of food and fruits scattered around.
“Aw, Jay… How did you manage to do all this?”
“My stupid brothers have to be useful for something.”
You laughed and playfully hit his arm. “This is so beautiful, I'm about to start crying.”
Jason wrapped his arm around your waist.
“So long as they're happy tears, love.”
“Definitely happy tears.”
The ocean waves mesmerized you. The sea was always your safe space, and the beach was pretty empty so the two of you could peacefully eat and talk. Even in the moments where you were silent, the warmth of your love enveloped you guys like a comforting hug, sometimes it was overwhelming. Gratefulness was what you felt, for having him and for all the beautiful memories he continued to provide you with, it was like nothing you'd ever felt.
After the sun completely set, Jason started to pack everything up. “C'mon beautiful girl, there's more waiting for you at home.”
“Is it a pet pony?”
“Yes, it talks and has a tiny hat. How did you guess?”
You laughed and helped him carry everything back to the car. When you arrived home, there were small candles and fairy lights all scattered through the entrance and living room, and on your couch sat a variety of bags.
“Go make yourself comfortable, I need to get our dinner going.” He quickly went to the kitchen and you heard a few pans clincking and the oven being turned on.
“Jay, this is so much stuff.”
“Bruce is a billionaire, he won't even notice.”
“You used Bruce's money?”
“He's my dad and he let me die once. I think I'm allowed that.”
“You're so right, babe. It's a shame you didn't use his money for that pony, though. I really believed you earlier.”
He sighed dramatically and placed his hand over his chest. “I shall order a pony as quickly as I can. I am sorry for this unforgivable mistake.”
“I'll forgive you if the food you're cooking is good.”
“Oh just wait, I asked for Alfie's recipes and he guided me through every dish. All your favourites, by the way.”
He sat next to you and handed you the biggest bag. “I hope you like your presents, love.”
Jason's gifts for you ranged from books that you had on your To Be Read list for a while, clothes that you mentioned wanting, new shoes and a beautiful necklace that paired with them. The last gift was a beautiful handwritten note. It was super poetic and it conveyed his love for you perfectly. You loved everything, and tears were definitely shed at the note.
“Thank you so much, baby. I love everything.”
“I'm so glad you do, I always worry that you won't like something. Dinner should be ready in a few, and Alfred baked you a cake.”
“Aw, that's so sweet of him.”
“Mhm,” He got closer and kissed you softly. “Not as sweet as the dessert I'll be eating, though.”
“Jason!” You giggled as he kissed you again.
“What? Today's all about you, baby.” His voice dropped an octave. “And I don't think the diner I'm cooking will be enough to satiate my hunger.”
i’m going to be really honest with you guys i think the tendency to read the absolute worst possible intentions into every action you don’t agree with is getting too automatic and it’s eating you from the inside out
summary: in which the Justice League notice that Batman is infatuated with Bruce Wayne’s wife, and need to help him get over her (impossible)
pairing: husband!bruce wayne/batman x wife!reader
warnings: none? maybe mentions of slight violence. fluff.
a/n: inspired by this fic by @ilianasbruce
dividers by: @saradika-graphics and @cafekitsune
MASTERLIST part two!
it started when batman and superman were at the watchtower together.
they were doing their own work silently, at opposite ends of the table.
superman was pretending that he wasn’t secretly writing an article for the daily planet that was due within the week (that he had completely forgotten about), and batman was pretending that he wasn’t secretly texting his wife under the table.
bruce: how is the opera, my love? i’m sorry i couldn’t be there, the league has demands.
a lie. he just had a headache earlier and felt like jumping out of a window at the thought of having to put on a smile for the folk and sit through an opera. he did feel guilty about you being on your own, though.
you: it’s alright. i actually know some people here, and they aren’t all bad, bruce.
bruce: you say that now, but wait until they each give you a rundown on each car in their garage.
you: like how you give me a rundown on each gadget you come up with in the batcave?
bruce: that’s different.
you: of course it is. i actually like listening to you.
the familiar ‘ping!’ of one of batman’s gadgets interrupted the silence.
superman looked up, eager to be doing something other than whatever paper in front of him that he wasn’t even focusing on.
“what is that?” his words came out immediately, and before batman could answer, he was speaking again. “robbery? alien invasion?”
“Poison Ivy in Gotham.” Batman is already standing, beginning his exit of the watchtower. Superman follows him.
“Can I come? Please?”
Batman turns, looking at him. “What?”
“It’s boring in here!” Superman gestures around. “And if I’m on my own it’ll be even more boring. C’mon, Batman, I can help you.”
Batman considers it for a moment before sighing. “Fine. But we’re going in the Batmobile.”
“But I can-“
“You are not flying me there, Superman.”
A few minutes later, they’re in the opera hall. Ivy seems to have taken over the stage, giving a speech on ways for the average person to decrease their carbon footprint.
Batman can see a few different people caught between her weeds. Long, thick plants have people in their grip. He scans the room quickly for you, breathing a silent sigh of relief when he sees that you are not captured, but instead just huddled in the corner with a group of others.
Superman doesn’t notice the way that Batman isn’t looking at Ivy, and begins his attack. Batman quickly follows. After a swift battle (turns out having Superman as an ally cuts down on battle time), Ivy is restrained and authorities arrive. The two start on recovering civilians before they both encounter you.
You’re comforting one of the women that was tangled in the weeds. You’re sitting beside her, nodding as she talked. You recognise the familiar pair of boots coming from the side of you. Your head lifts up slightly as you catch sight of the two men.
“Are you alright, Mrs. Wayne?” Superman speaks first, the familiar concern he has for everyone clear in his voice and expression. He recognises you from articles, and he’s heard enough from Cat Grant at the Daily Planet to know you’re married to Bruce Wayne.
“Yes, I’m fine,” you answer with a small smile. Your eyes move to Batman. “Thank you.”
Superman gives Batman a side glance as he hears Batmans heart skip a beat when you smile at him. He tries to not to make his suspicion obvious. However, he turns a little when he hears that Batmans heartbeat is now quicker than it had been five minutes ago.
However, nothing on Batmans mostly covered face gave away any feelings. He just nodded and said a quick: “Stay safe, ma’am.”
And Superman didn’t bring it up again. Perhaps it was just a coincidence. A heart skip doesn’t always mean feelings of infatuation, right?
The second time is with Flash and Green Lantern.
Batman is a stark contrast to the pair. Barry and Hal are close friends, and joke around when put together. Bruce will sigh, and tell them to be quiet, and then Barry tries to be serious, but Hal will mutter a sarcastic comment that makes him start laughing again and the cycle repeats.
So Batman is already tense from working with the two.
They’re investigating a case together, and encounter you somehow. (sorry that’s so vague i literally cannot think of a specific scenario here to save my life)
Flash asks you a few questions if you’ve seen or heard anything suspicious, and you shake your head and answer. Barry notices Batmans shoulders softening a little beside him.
It isn’t hugely noticeable, but Barry senses it. Batmans shoulders loose some of their tension as he talks to you, this civilian. And when Hal opens his mouth to make an implying comment, he tenses right back up again.
Barry’s eyes narrow. It isn’t often that the Bat actually feels emotions, so when he does, his friends take an interest.
On the way back, Barry nudges Hal.
“Hey, you notice the way Bats was acting around that woman earlier?” He whispers so the third man in front of them doesn’t hear.
“You mean that really hot one? Who wouldn’t act like that around her? Did you see her, Bar?”
Barry gives him a look, “yeah, but this is Batman. Brooding, stays-in-the-shadows, feels-nothing-but-rage-24/7, Batman.”
Hal ponders before shrugging. “I don’t know, maybe Spooky’s changed. Never underestimate the power of a beautiful woman, Barry.”
Barry thinks. “She looked kinda familiar, didn’t she? I can’t think of where I’ve seen her before.”
And when they see that the familiar face they were talking to was Bruce Wayne’s wife, they give each other an alarmed look before looking at Batman from across the room.
The third time was with Oliver goddamn Queen.
A charity gala. Bruce couldn’t go because he had intel that Scarecrow was planning on infiltrating the building while everyone was distracted, something about wanting to ‘test out a new gas’, and he had to be on watch as Batman for the evening.
You, however, decided to go. You had a nice dress and were getting close to some of the women there your age. It was nice to not be a total stranger in the room anymore.
So, as you filtered around the room, you met Oliver Queen. He sometimes teases Bruce on purpose by asking for a dance with you at other galas, but without Bruce he was simply a friend to enjoy a chat with.
When Scarecrow did burst in, you actually had been dancing with Oliver. A friendly turn around the room like the others were doing. By the time Batman had taken him down, and everyone emerged from the corners or hidden rooms, Oliver checked to see if you were okay. Lord knows Bruce would probably blame him if anything happened to you.
You were fine, thank God. Oliver’s sentence was interrupted by the Bat himself.
“Was anybody harmed?” the gruff voice asked, his gaze trying not to linger on you for too long.
“I don’t think so,” you replied. Oliver looked at Batman with a certain questioning that nobody seemed to notice.
“Good.” Batman was silent for a moment before speaking again. “Perhaps you all should start making your ways home. Scarecrow might return, or someone worse.”
You don’t miss a beat. “It’s a good thing we have someone like you to protect us, Batman.”
“Only a fool wouldn’t protect you, ma’am.”
Oliver blinked. Is Batman . . . flirting? With a married woman? Also, was that sentence a sneaky diss on him?
and Oliver could’ve sworn on his entire fortune that Batman’s lips were almost in a grin during his next sentence.
“Your husband is probably waiting on you, Mrs. Wayne.”
Oliver raised his eyebrows at your response. You laughed a little under your breath before speaking, “probably. I wouldn’t want to keep him up.”
Oliver looks between you and Batman. Perhaps he’s imagining things. You turn to him as if you’ve just remembered that he’s still there.
“Oliver, you have a safe way home, right?”
“Yeah, I’ll call my driver.”
He doesn’t bring it up the next time he sees Batman as Green Arrow. Batman doesn’t speak of it either. But his eyes narrow a little at the Bats whenever Bruce Wayne or his wife is mentioned.
Eventually, it comes up in conversation when Batman isn’t there.
They’re in the common room, and Diana is flipping through the newspaper. She’s on a page that features a picture of you at the latest event with a description of your outfit beside it. Beside her, Hal recognises you.
“Hey, Flash,” he begins, stabbing the page with his finger. “Isn’t that who we were talking to a couple days earlier?”
Barry is behind the couch in a second, nodding. “Yeah, we asked her a couple questions with Batman.” He looks up a takes a quick glance to see if anyone’s expression changes. “He seemed . . . different around her.”
Clark closes the book in his hand with a loud snap, looking at the three on the couch.
“You’ve noticed too?”
Hal laughs, “that Bats has the hots for a married woman? Yeah.”
Diana frowns a little. “That is unlike Batman. He’s known for his self-restraint. It doesn’t seem likely he would harbour a liking for someone else’s wife, especially Bruce Wayne’s. Doesn’t Wayne sponsor him or something?”
Oliver joins in. “Wonder Woman, you haven’t seen him with her. I mean, it was only a few seconds but he was a totally different person.”
“How so?” Diana asked curiously.
“He . . . relaxed a little.”
She raised her eyebrows. Barry cut in.
“Wonder, you need to see it to understand it. It’s like no one else even enters his mind when he’s looking at her. I think everything else sorta faded away, you know?”
“Like in those rom-coms I’ve been shown?” She suggests.
“Yeah!”
Clark thinks for a moment, wondering what to do to help his obviously hopeless friend. How do you break the news to an emotionally constipated Bat that he has to squash his feelings before anything terrible happens?
So, they organise an intervention. A very unorganised organised intervention.
Your name gets mentioned during a briefing. About how you could be potential target for a kidnapping due to your status.
Hal’s mouth works quicker than his mind.
“What about Bruce Wayne?”
“What about Bruce Wayne?” Batman asks in his low voice, his back still turned to the team.
“Just saying, he’s probably a potential target too, right?” Green Lantern points out. “He’s her husband, after all.”
Batman turns. They all seem to be looking for his reaction.
“Right, I was just getting to that.” He says stiffly. “So I think until Joker is tracked down again, a pair of eyes should be on them. Since Gotham is my city, I can-“
“Ohhhh, hold on,” Flash says, leaning forward. “Central City has been very quiet lately, so I’m free too.”
Wonder Woman joins in. “I’m interested too. I think the more people, the quicker we could get this done.”
Batman blinks. “Why the sudden interest in Gotham from you two?”
They both shrug, mumbling incoherent words that overlap each other. Something about “new environments” and “change of pace”.
Green Arrow smirks. “I wouldn’t mind accompanying. (Name) and her husband should get all the protection they can get.”
Batman isn’t showing it, but he’s confused. Less members have volunteered themselves for prison breaks. Why are three other members wanting to go to Gotham for an unconfirmed threat? And why do they keep looking at him like that?
“Yes,” Superman clears his throat. “Mrs (Name) is a kind woman who shouldn’t be in danger. And Bruce Wayne is similar in nature. He is valuable to Gotham City.”
Batman prepared his disliking-Bruce-Wayne act with practised ease. “Bruce Wayne is a spoiled idiot.”
“Of course you think that.” Green Lantern mutters with a smug smirk. Flash nudges him.
“What do you mean?” Batman asks, and Hal practically explodes.
“We know you’re attracted to (Name) Wayne!” He says, making Barry cover his eyes with his hands. Not how the conversation was supposed to go.
“Excuse me?” Batman is -frankly- appalled. Hal grimaces, instantly reminded of who exactly he’s talking to.
“You’re, uh . . .” he splutters before quickly mumbling, “you’re in love with (name).” He gains some of his confidence, and straightens up again, “and you were about to let Bruce Wayne get kidnapped, so you could swoop in and seduce her!” He tops it all off with hand gestures of the supposed ‘swooping’.
Batmans gaze sweeps the table. Nobody meets his eye except Diana, who just seems to be staring at him for his response. A few of them have to stop themselves from laughing at the idea of Batman ‘seducing’ someone.
“And what exactly gave you that idea?”
Barry is filled with a newfound confidence. “Oh, c’mon Bats, a blind man would see how you act around her!” He smirked a little. “You went a little . . . soft.”
Green Arrow snorts. “Sometimes I think you’re only protecting Gotham because she’s in it.”
Batman thinks. Has he been that transparent? He’s always careful about his expressions and body reactions. Maybe he is getting soft. He obviously didn’t take enough care.
A fleeting image passes his mind, where he declares his love for you to the team. How could he not show you off? He would love to tell them that you were with him.
But, of course, he doesn’t do that. He just blinks.
“I am not in love with (name), that’s ridiculous.” He scoffs. “Number one, I don’t fall in love with anyone. Number two, she’s married, so I think that means she’s out of the dating pool.”
Not one face looking back at him looks convinced.
However, a cold stare and a swift change of topic ensured that nobody tries to start the conversation again.
They do, however, take a bigger interest in Gotham nowadays. Whenever a mission includes you somehow, there’s always one of them volunteering to go. They all think that distance will make sure Batman goes back to his cold and steely ways of not having a crush on anyone’s wife.
Bruce crawls under the covers with a small groan, shuffling next to you. His arms go around your warm body as he rests his face near yours. He’s desperate to soak up your warmth after being out in the cold all night.
“Long night?” you ask, your voice still quiet from sleep.
“Long day,” he responds, tucking himself into you. You keep your arms around him. “The League accused Batman of being attracted to Bruce Wayne’s wife today.”
It takes you a moment to realise what he’s talking about. You breathe out a laugh. “Is Batman not in love with me?”
Bruce grins against your skin. “He might be.” He murmurs. “Just a little, though.”
You raise your eyebrows, turning to look at Bruce. “Does Batman know I’m married? And that I’m very loyal to my husband?”
“Oh, yes,” he responded, and sits up a little. he pressed his forehead to yours. “and Batman knows that there’s nobody else on this earth that loves you more than I do.”
You smile, your fingers in his hair now. he leans closer to press his lips to yours, an action that you return. Bruce keeps himself against you for a long time. He likes falling asleep with you in his arms. He likes feeling like the protector.
It’s why he needs to sleep on the side of the bed closest to the door. It’s why he needs to know where you are each night. It’s why he needs to know you’re safe. And if your safety comes along with each League member giving him looks because they think he’s harbouring a crush for another man’s wife, then so be it.
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