nonsensical starters
edit as you see fit!
better take a sip of water after eating so much trash!
why would they eat food if they had trash on hand
thereâs a lot going on in my agenda but that certainly ainât part of it
explain the inherent paradox of whatever the fuck is going on here
be brutally honest, did anything of what i just said sound at least a little profound, please, i need the validation
that is not the kind of association i would typically claim or at least not openly
out of curiosity, where exactly does this rank on your list of âworst ideasâ?
would you reconsider reconsidering that
i like to think i shanât be deterred by a pretty face with a heinous scar but i have thought wrong before
are you seriously trying to tell me youâre too much of a coward to commit tax fraud?
i genuinely want to choke you in the unsexiest way imaginable
hey, i have cried before, i listen to good music, back off
for the record, i have lifted a car and i would do it again
no, you are not allowed to touch my knife collection
being traumatised didnât make me sexy enough so i went ahead and traumatised some other people instead
you are not emotionally equipped for the kind of judgement my cat would pass onto you
i ate corn from chicken feed earlier thinking it was a bread crumb
yeah, well, maybe i donât want to be the kind of person youâd feel comfortable taking home to your parents, have you ever thought about that?
would you like some existential dread with your french breakfast?
have you tried pavlov-ing your way out of it?
iâm being bullied by a fucking fly, but how was your afternoon?
have you considered not picking up rusty metal from the street?
and this here is my collection of trash iâve picked up on various occasions
the way you continue demanding people justify their decision to live in a cave deep in the mountains is honestly beneath you
what i want is more representation for women mad scientists
okay, okay, consider this: i poke them lightly with a very sharp object
how about you tell your sexy demon-prince boytoy to stop making me question things?
whoâd like to dramatically confess their undying love to me and die horrendously right after?
debate: to die late and boringly or to die now and sexily
no, that seatâs reserved for the monster in our basement
i think your anime cat girlfriend would be very disappointed, thatâs all iâm saying
itâs the clown express and i brought you your ticket
well, if you wanted me to get a driverâs license before agreeing to drive you, you should have said so
i have a tendency to distrust people who are good at geometry, thatâs all
donât tell them that, theyâre gonna think youâre diagnosing them with something
stop faking your own death, for fuckâs sake!
itâs my death and i do whatever i want with it
stop introducing me to good-hearted people, i hate that
i donât know what to do with people who have good morals and you know that
oh i feel a found family situation coming on
hey! thatâs hilarious! never say that again!
silence, my dear friend, i feel nought but disdain for your fatherly sense of humour
have you tried turning your mentally exhausting and emotionally traumatising relationship with your parents off and back on again?
stop trying to get some random victorian ghost to haunt you, theyâre not as fun-dramatic as youâd like them to be
oh god this is the tenth powerpoint presentation youâre showing us today
thatâs some sexy self-propaganda you got going on there, how does your therapist feel about it?
imagine the things we could do if either of us werenât so goddamn depressed
no, iâm not in 'a good moodâ, iâm manic, i bought thirty bags of chicken feed
how about you stop going grocery shopping with our worst enemy?
i am asking you kindly and desperately, please stop having an enemies-to-lovers arc with my mother
please stop using my trips to the er/a&e as inspiration for your fanfictions
no i do not know who that is literally no one does your interests are obscure and frankly a little scary!
for the love of god stop using that word it doesnât mean what you think it does
that is ridiculous, how could i possibly have the power to piss off an entire country
please support my sexy scary creature of the night endeavours? please?
stop spontaneously combusting, this is the last time iâm asking you
stop âhaving a thinkâ itâs not working
i hate telling you what to do but you might literally die if i donât
hey, is it normal to have meet-cutes exclusively at funerals because if i had a penny
godâs trying some new torture method and iâm not having it
every mannequin here has a backstory, would you care to hear them?
going to start praying to the greek gods because i need deities as petty as me