a dying thing

[stardustghost]

ROMANA, as stolen from classic who and interwoven with modern who by birdie. [ the timelord that never gets to rest. ] a study of survival, repression, and how far you can run before anger and loss destroy you. heavily affiliated with @venturousheart && @chloevlinder

CARRD. | INTEREST TRACKER. | MEMES. | REGENERATIONS.

[elektricheartz]

Margo in every episode → 2x13 “We Have Brought You Little Cakes”

[chloevlinder-a]

She stands in front of a stranger who feels so extraordinarily familiar. She has of course spotted the cape, and it brings up questions that are answered when the familiar stranger speaks. Her heart stills and is revived so quickly by the relief. Last memory of her friend is burnt into her memory. She knows that was the last time that she would ever see that face of Romana. How could she not? Yet there is a lightness that comes from seeing those same eyes, dark and war torn. There isn't any mistaking it.

"I do," she answers softly as she takes the seat next to her. Quiet lingers, allowing the sounds of the birds and the rustling of the leaves in the trees to take over as she tries to think of how to broach the subject. Fingers tentatively reach for hers. She's not sure if it's welcome, but she would like nothing less. She has lost so much already. She isn't the kind to start rejecting anything offered.

"I wondered since then how long it would be until I saw you the last time. If I would know it was you." And the answer is clear now. She turns to her, delicate smile on her lips. "Were you alone?"

[stardustghost]

people keep seeming...   happy she's not fully gone.   it's an insane reaction,  the wrong one,  a relief that she has to almost bite through tongue to stop herself from correcting.  she doesn't pull away from touch as old self would have - yet she doesn't react to it either.  same brown eyes simply glance down to see what other is doing then back up to world around them.  ( it's a twist she never saw coming.  she's here.   she's in a new skin once again. )   she'd been so ready to give herself up in battle  &&   she's instead left with the horror of continued survival.

" we're all alone in the end. "   and yet,   not fully.  clara's existence had still been in danger  - things were still going badly badly wrong.  she'd played her part the best she could and own life had been a fair exchange.

" but,   I was cared for,  if that's your worry.  I -  that version of me didn't go completely alone. "   all that anger,  all that burning rage.   in the end it had been just another mask for the grief that now she must learn to carry too.  instead she picks up once signature cape,  brushing thumb over burn mark.  " I thought about not telling you.   I still think it would have been the better choice,  but I know you wouldn't choose it. "

[talonabraxas]

The Dust of Ancients Talon Abraxas

[rosewolfin-deactivated20241018]

“He’s not my guide.” First response to the other’s words is nothing but defiance. MISSY?! Who did this person think they are?! Condescending for someone who tried to hide their face in the darkness underneath a hood, that was sure. She could never stand this; the tone – it drives her mad with the Doctor too, and she has snapped at him for it, before. He was fantastic at driving her mad sometimes, as if that was exactly what he wanted – and then he smiled one of those smiles and everything that had been important before, seemed so unimportant all of a sudden. It drove her mad, too, but for other reasons.

Raising her chin a little, she grabbed the sonic screwdriver from her pocket, that the Doctor had handed to her, before he had run off in the other direction. He had a plan – and she had her role to play in it, which she was willing to do.

“I can look after myself. – And if you’re trying to threaten me, you’re doing a bad job.” Head tilting, watchful hazel eyes resting on the figure. “What do you know about this place, then?”

[stardustghost]

fiery.  the doctor's type hasn't changed.   own london accent stands out in a place such as this,  unable and unwilling to avoid urge to roll dark brown eyes at other's final words,  sharp little almost laugh coming to lips in barely audible hum.  " if I was threatening you,  I wouldn't have gone to the effort of saving your life.  and there would be no 'if' in your mind.  planning on checking if I have a screw loose or sonic-ing me to death? "

her voice remains dry,  a sarcastic drawl as hands bury in pockets,  young woman simply moving to step around blonde and to just...  continue on her way.   she's done her part,  avoided immediate tragedy.

" then I'm sure you already know what you need to. don't go near the red plants,  they're toxic to humans.  like chocolate to a chihuahua. "   brunette has places to be and her amusement can only last so long,  boots soundless despite how heavy they seem on ground as she moves to walk away.  " and if anyone offers you anything,  don't drink it.  ciao. "

[belladoesrpmeme]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 !

For the tough-hearted who wants incredible angst that could fit either a platonic and/or romantic scenarios. Feel free to change the pronouns / sentence structure according to your preferences!    TRIGGER WARNING:  Mentions of deaths.

i. leaving / left.

“Wait, you’re leaving…?”

“[Name] just told me. You’re gonna leave?”

“…where are you going?”

“I didn’t wanna believe [Name], but you’re really leaving, huh.”

“I don’t understand why you didn’t tell me sooner.”

“I don’t know what to say, do you want me to wish you good luck or something? ‘Cause I hate this. I hate every part of this.”

“I don’t… I don’t want to let you go.”

“Please don’t go.”

“Why can’t you stay?”

“Is it because of me? Am I not enough?”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“You have to let go of me.”

“No, no, just — just one second longer, please. Let me hug you for one more second—”

“No, don’t tell me it’s okay, it’s not okay, you’re leaving me!”

“…will you be gone long?”

“You won’t come back, will you?”

“There’s the train / plane / taxi. I — I gotta go.”

“You’re really not saying goodbye?”

“All you left me was a letter, saying you’re sorry. You’re pathetic.”

“If you love me, please don’t go.”

“I’m really trying not to put my abandonment issues on you, but I’m fucking scared, okay? I’m scared you’ll leave. And you are.”

ii. dying / died.

“Wait, wait, wait, hold on. Hold on. This can’t be real, can it? You can’t be… You can’t be dying.”

“This is some sick joke, right? You’re not really sick. This is some kind of prank? ‘Cause— cause this isn’t funny, [Name], you can’t—”

“No, no, no, I love you, please — please come back.”

“No, please, no. Don’t fall asleep. No, open your eyes, come on, look at me—”

“I wish we had more time.”

“Every day I come in here knowing that one of these days that damn bed will be empty and every time, I feel like screaming and wishing I could tell the universe to take me instead, but they won’t. It’s you. They’re taking you. So tell me how I’m supposed to live with that?”

“You die, I die.”

“I don’t think I can go home knowing I won’t see you around anymore.”

“You’ll be fine. You’ll be okay. You’re just a little cold. Right?”

“I’m sorry I didn’t do much before. I would’ve taken you everywhere. I would’ve loved you right.”

“I wish you could’ve just broken my heart in the normal way. At least you’d be alive.”

“I’m telling the nurse I’m staying by your side tonight. I don’t care if it’s not allowed, I’ll fight them.”

“We’re running out of time.”

“Anything’s better than this. Than you, gone. What am I supposed to do without you, huh?”

“Listen to me, you are the most important person in my life. I’m sorry you’re going through this.”

“I don’t want you to see me like this…”

“If you must die, die knowing your life was my life’s best part.”

“Maybe in another life.”

“The doctors said I don’t have much time left. I - I’m sorry.”

“I just saw you. You were — you were laughing. You can’t be gone.”

iii. separating / separated.

“So, this is it, huh?”

“…for all it’s worth, I loved you. So much.”

“I’m sorry for what I did.”

“You deserve better. You always have.”

“Tell me this isn’t you breaking up with me.”

“I still remember the first time I saw you…”

“Please don’t cry, please, I—”

“C’mon baby, don’t — don’t make this harder than it is.”

“Don’t cry with me, stupid. I thought this was mutual.”

“I can’t believe you’re breaking my heart like this.”

“We had a good run, didn’t we? We really loved each other, right?”

“IT’S OVER, DO YOU HEAR ME?! WE’RE DONE!”

“If you show your face around me the second time, I will kill you.”

“Who would’ve thought we’d ended up here. Hating each other.”

“We were… we were so in love.”

“It’s not even about the other person, it’s us okay? It’s us. We’re a problem.”

“I don’t wanna hurt you. Not more than this. I’m sorry.”

iv. miscommunication.

“You fucking ignored me. You didn’t even tell me why!”

“So now that you’re in deep shit, you suddenly remember me again? How convenient!”

“Fuck you! FUCK YOU! I NEEDED YOU! AND YOU WEREN’T THERE!”

“I don’t know why we stopped talking. I wish you would just tell me.”

“You won’t even look me in the eyes anymore.”

“Did I really hurt you that bad? I didn’t know.”

“You never said anything! Every time you’re angry or sad, you just kept it in!”

“I never knew what you were thinking.”

“I’m so tired of reaching out only to realise I’m grasping on thin air.”

“Why can’t we just talk like we used to?”

“Things were so easy back then.”

“You’re not the same person I knew.”

“…I still care about you, you know.”

“You just left. I didn’t why. I didn’t know what happened.”

“I wish things were different.”

“You’re giving me the cold shoulder again. How typical.”

“You know what you did wrong? You didn’t believe me.”

“I just wanted you to be there. I just wanted to know that I wasn’t alone. And you failed.”

“Look, can we… can we not talk about this now? Please?”

“I’ve been trying to talk to you, but it’s like I’M TALKING TO A BRICK WALL!”

v. betrayal / betrayed.

“I trusted you.”

“You trust me? Honey, that’s your fault.”

“You’re looking at me like I’m your biggest mistake. I already know I am.”

“You fucking manipulated me. You made me believe you.”

“So all those times we spent together? That was, what, for show?”

“I thought… I thought we were friends.”

“I thought we had something special.”

“You were like a brother to me!”

“I never really had anybody before. But then you came. I shouldn’t have known even you would screw me over.”

“SCREW YOU! DON’T EVER SHOW YOUR FACE TO ME AGAIN!”

“You’re not even moving. You’re THAT shocked that I did this to you? You must’ve really trusted me.”

“I — I didn’t want to. But I had to.”

“It wasn’t easy, you know? I… I really liked you.”

“Oh, stop playing victim. You had this coming.”

“You’ve always treated me like shit! And now you’re surprised I would do this to you?!”

“It wasn’t all fake, what we had. You were just not my endgame.”

“I can’t believe I shared my food with you. Turned out, you’re just a scheming scumbag, like the rest of them!”

“It’s my fault. I put my faith in you. They warned me not to.”

“Believe you? Yeah. The last time I did went SO well.”

“I’d rather walk into an ongoing traffic than to trust you again.”

“I let you into my life and you did this…? I should’ve known.”

“Please tell me this isn’t true. You wouldn’t do this to me, would you? Would you?”

vi. misc scenarios.

[Text] I hate you. 

[Text] I keep calling you hoping you’d pick up. Or text you, hoping you’d reply. But I know you won’t.

[Text] I’ve still got your stuff. What should I do about it?

[Text] I wish I could say I hate you, but we both know I’m lying.

[Text] I don’t wanna fight, I wanna see you.

[Text] I know we’re not talking, but I miss you.

[Text] Dumbass. I’ve always loved you. Leaving you was the hardest thing I ever did.

[Text] I wish it didn’t end the way it did.

[Text] I’ll always have your back. Even after everything, okay? Always.

[reallyhardy]

stephanie beatriz as candy in the trailer for half magic (2018.)

[stardustghost]

other reeks of the time vortex, of space and stars and a thousand places no human of this era should be able to imagine. yet he isn't. every bone in her, every instinct, whispers that he doesn't fit - he's a piece of a different puzzle, a being that sets everything inside of her on edge. ( wrong, wrong, wrong. maybe that's why her tardis brought her here - because there was something suffocating in air. )

" not to be rude, but what? " voice is a little sharp, trying to process space around her, trying to process the trinkets that shouldn't be invented for centuries still. not for centuries and not by humans. " pretty much any what you want to answer. what's going on, what's a person doing so far outside of their era, what do you think the thing you're working on is. any what. it's a what pick && mix. " nothing about @timeconqueror seems right and her hearts drum out a quick rhythm to match speed of spoken words.

starter call.

[dvoyd]

“you’re a dying thing that never quite dies. still desperate, still trying to keep going, to keep flying— to prove you’re alive.”

— the difference between surviving and living | m.a.w

[stardustghost]

torchwood is always so busy: always handling one emergency or another, darting around city trying to control the stuff of stars. she's young - younger than most of team, skilled enough at getting herself in trouble that ignoring her curiosity was bound to leave them with her blood on hands. ( she has potential, she's been told, gifted with languages - with translating things even computers would need weeks with. fred can't ask more than to be useful, to be given anything that might occupy her mind. )

" it's fred. not francine. I never use francine. " she doesn't need to look up to know who is approaching, spot on desk comfortable - legs curled beneath herself, eyes only on the screen on her lap as london accent clings to quickly hummed words. " so you're a doctor-doctor, not a phd doctor or expert in ceramics doctor? " she can't help own curiosity, the way it spills from her lips. " how does a doctor-doctor end up an alien expert, @yoakkemae? "

starter call. | for martha

[icemacklin]

[burnedself]

Everyone had their hobbies; Solving the daily crossword, doing puzzles, going fishing. Him? He had a fondness for springing obvious traps, call it his way of keeping his brain young and beautiful. "A note to the architect-- Zero in on a theme. No spikes? Sharks with lasers? I can hardly tell whether this is a kill room or a bore room." He calls out, to whomever was watching (there was always someone watching), fingers pressing against the glass, brows raised as eyes scanned over the room.

Glass wasn't electrified (for the moment?), no obvious weapons primed-- Deadly gas? Should check for hidden vents.

His train of thought gets interrupted by the arrival of the other, eyes immediately zeroing in on the figure that makes herself known. Hadn't he seen her before? What was it, bumped into the street? In a hurry, nice cape. Who was she, the maniacal mastermind behind it all, or merely a chance meeting?

He never liked a coincidence, it was just the universe's way of showing off.

"I often do." He keeps his tone light, but there was a tightness to him, just the briefest hint of ice beneath. Call it caution, a hunch, a gnawing feeling at the back of his mind. " I once escaped from a safe with a toothpick. Underwater. Blindfolded."

[stardustghost]

he talks and talks and talks,    and for a moment she can almost see her doctor still within him,  so painted with arrogance,  a pocket full of jelly babies. she'd loved him so dearly back then:  had grown to see him as better than what she'd spent lifetime striving towards.  she'd even repainted herself in his image when first regenerating -  softening sharp edges,  trying to warm coldness into something more palatable.  something more hopeful.     ( that tender version of herself had suffered so dearly once war came,  when once again she'd needed to destroy herself to be what others needed. )

" I don't know the architect.  or the trap owners. "   light dismissal comes to words,  studying room through glass more than she ever seems to look at him. " I'm just visiting for their library. biggest this side of the universe. "

soon.  soon she'll leave and let him handle this.    " the blindfold seems superfluous given how dark being in an underwater safe already is. "   cold clings to her,  features straight out of winter painting,  carved directly from snow and ice.  

yet she pushes herself up on nearby surface,  sitting on edge as she simply...  watches.  sharp and curious,  untrusting of his every little movement.  she's a blizzard disguised as a girl,  a mess hidden by too thin skin and smudged eyeliner.  " you always did like a good story though.  it's one of your constants. "

it's as close to a clue that deep down,  he knows her,  as she is willing to get.

[stardustghost]

ROMANA IV, as stolen from classic who and interwoven with modern who by birdie, 25+. mutuals only, will prioritise people who follow my main blog. a story of surviving, of learning to cope with the nightmares, of trying to fix the broken hearts in your chest.

[stardustghost]

this is going to hurt. it's going to hurt, and there is truly nothing that can be done about it. by now - she's sure - @chloevlinder has put two and two together. has realised that last encounter was meant to be a goodbye, that the dangerous thing that was yet to come swallowed the romana she'd known and spat out bones && stardust. ( there is nobody else to mourn her, to miss the angry child in smudged eyeliner, nobody else to notice that she is gone. )

clara is just happy there's still a romana, choice to regenerate that has caught them both off guard. this new her remains perched on edge of park bench, watching how once friend - how soon to be lost friend - follows texted directions to spot. fingers gently toy with the cape next to her, a last souvenir that should rightfully go to the closest to a next of kin she has.

" do you remember, on the comet passing solaris sixty, you asked about regenerations? " new voice is... new. strange still in her throat. same brown eyes never quite leave other, " and I told you it was death in a pretty bow? "

starter call.

[digitalroot]

Visit Original Link

[stardustghost]

maybe for one of her regenerations, she should have chosen to be taller. to try it out. it's an odd thought, a rare comparison to the women she'd been - those she had buried in order to survive, and survive, and survive. yet this body was built to be quick, not to be nice, to build walls instead of bridges. yet ancient eyes don't match the youth of her features as weight shifts from one foot, glancing from door to stranger, to the little alien creature she'd come to get that mewls and hides beneath table.

" it's just a baby. it won't hurt you. " reassurance comes as blankly as she can make it, dark haired woman not moving from where she leans against wall. @espercr doesn't feel like a threat, so she doesn't approach this as if human will do harm to tiny being. " he didn't mean to break in. they're attracted to sweet things, he must be hungry. "

starter call.

[stardustghost]

a little reminder! it's in my rules, but I'm going to be VERY selective about writing with people who don't follow my main blog ( @doctordonovan ). maeve is my baby, and where most of my time will still be dedicated. I'm trying to keep this blog 'vibes I know' given what a mess the fandom becomes every time there's an influx of new people around airing dates. x