he’d never be accepted completely, of course. a bitter smile curved his lips at the idea. he knew better than to hope for that. there would never be a place where he could belong completely, where he could truly be himself.
everyone had told her she had to come— after all, how can a normal, sound teenage girl ever skip out on such a beautiful festivity? it’s bound to be the absolute talk of the new school year, after all. gossip, getting drunk, and getting to see who sneaks off together? that’s just about all that should matter to her, in the present moment. however, all she’s doing is counting the amount of times she had a bear a completely feigned smile, faked for the sake of not having to talk about her dead parents at a party. god, it almost feels like her cheeks ache from having them pulled back from all of that forced laughter. she absolutely regrets coming, but part of her knows that this will be good practice for what’s bound to be her experience during the rest of the school year. ( and it’s miserable already. )
after managing to sneak off from a group of friends, she begins walking towards a clearing in the woods, phone in her right hand and drink in her left. she’s just about to text jenna that she can’t take this any longer when she feels her drink collide with someone else, ice pouring onto her shoes in a tragic display of maladroit. - - - nice one, elena. now you’re definitely not going anywhere. “ oh, my god, ” she says, shoving her phone into her back pocket. “ i’m so sorry, i was on my phone, and—” she shakes her head, looking around briefly before fixating on the stain. “ here— ” a hand reaches into her other back pocket, retrieving an unused tissue and reaching towards his shirt, but just before she can use it, she looks up and her eyes widen slightly. even if the lighting obscures just about every feature of his, she’s almost sure she has no idea who he is. great, now this is a new kid’s first impression of her. “ sorry, again. it was totally my fault, ” she replies, handing the tissue towards him so he can use it on himself instead.
EVEN HER VOICE WAS THE SAME. in a moment that was almost too quick for stefan to control, every muscle in his body tensed as his eyes slowly lifted to meet... hers. katharine. no. no. that was impossible. and logically, he knew that was impossible. his own brother had witnessed their love burn up in a fire over one hundred and fifty years ago, and yet... here she stood. those same, big eyes looking up at him like it had been no time at all. but stefan knew it was different. he could tell. he couldn’t explain it, no, but this was not the same katharine that he had fallen in love with all those years ago. those eyes might have been the same, but what glinted behind them was something softer than miss pierce had ever been, a gentle ( broken ) girl whose soft spoken words were a far cry from the sharp tongue that had been used to coerce stefan so many times before. he couldn’t explain it but it wasn’t her. this truly was ELENA GILBERT... whoever that may be.
snapped out of his daze after what had been far too long a pause, stefan gratefully accepted the tissues extended to him and tried his best to mop up what he could of the drink which was already staining his cotton shirt. hearing her apologise, he could only smile. ❛ hey, no, don’t worry --- i should’ve looked where i was going. ❜ when his gaze lifted back to hers, he found his eyes locked in a trance that must’ve looked utterly terrifying to the girl who had clearly never met him before --- but he just couldn’t help himself. stefan had almost forgotten just how beautiful she was. and now that he had the chance to look at her again... he wasn’t sure he could ever look anywhere else. ( but it was starting to get creepy ) tearing his eyes away, he let out a nervous chuckle as he looked back down at his shirt. ❛ i’m... i’m stefan by the way. i just moved here with my uncle. ❜
you should go to that bonfire. it’ll be good for you. jenna’s order suggestion echoed through his head as he knocked back another beer. d on’t even pretend they’re not hosting one. it’s tradition, and you need to get out of the house. the bonfire was bullshit and everyone there was bullshit. school was about to start and it was bullshit, too. the pity stares were bad enough any time he went into town over the summer. now he was supposed to face them for eight hours a day straight? it fucking sucked. he needed another beer—no, what he needed was to smoke, but he hadn’t even seen vicki yet. fuck. jer flipped his hood up, hoping to avoid attention. “ah, shit. which way to the keg?” he asked, staring down at his empty cup. coulda sworn it was to the left.
HE LOOKED LIKE A CHILD. correction : he was a child. stefan recognised jeremy gilbert almost immediately from the many photos he had found of him with elena, and though he had been watching the boy afar for quite some time now, he didn’t dare approach. how could he possibly explain that he knew his name ? of course, he wouldn’t mention it --- but it felt like overstepping, somehow, to have done the stalking and now to act no it. no, his plan to stay away was simple and easy and he would stick by i--- shit. now the kid was talking to him. after a beat of panicked silence on stefan’s part, he took a step forward with his hands still stuffed in his pockets. ❛ uh, i think it’s... that way, ❜ he pointed. ❛ towards the fire. but maybe it’s... maybe you’ve had enough. ❜
HE HAD YET TO FIND ELENA in the sea of drunken students --- but perhaps he had found the next best thing. stefan had had his eyes on the preppy blonde for a while now, hoping that if he watched her long enough she would lead him to elena, but it had been an hour now and still there was no sign of her. and quite frankly, he was starting to feel like the blonde’s stalker. perhaps it was best at this point to just approach her. there was no harm in making a new friend, after all, should his attempts at hinting on the whereabouts of elena fail. making his way towards her, gaze set with such confidence that the party guests practically parted the sea to let him past, he made a quick pit stop to the drinks table for something to offer her --- a friendly gesture, one might say. finally coming to a stop just beside her, he held out the drink with a soft smile. ❛ looks like your cups finished. thought i’d help you out. that and i needed someone to talk to. you can only play the lonely new guy card for so long before people start to think you don’t talk, y’know ? ❜
IT HAD BEEN EXACTLY A WEEK SINCE HE HAD SPOTTED HER --- talking ever so inconspicuously to a preppy blonde though she had yet to notice him. it was terrifying --- exhilarating --- awful to see her again, his stomach a mix of butterflies and nausea as he’d zipped immediately home to use every piece of internet available to him to try and figure out who she was. ELENA GILBERT. supposedly not katharine. though that was still yet to be decided on stefan’s part. after enrolling himself quickly in her high school ( he’d already made the executive decision before he’d seen her that he would be attending ), he heard through the magic of social media that there would be a special bonfire for the students of said school. and surely she would be there. he had to attend.
and so as the sun set beneath the tree line, stefan stuffed his hands in his pockets and wandered towards the blazing fire, over excited ( drunk ) students pushing past him as he kept his eyes peeled for her. heading towards the edge of the woods, he was careful to deny any drink that was extended to him, though obviously not careful enough as he found himself crashing into one of these hands, the drink spilling all across his front as he jumped back. ❛ shhhh... ❜ holding his tongue, he looked up at the guilty patron, a small smile forced on his lips to show he wasn’t actually angry. ❛ sorry ‘bout that --- i must’ve gotten in your way. ❜
✦ * · ˚ ( thomas hayes, cismale, he/him ) — did you see STEFAN SALVATORE walking through town? i hear the 17 / 172 year old is a VAMPIRE, but that might just be a rumor. some say they are BALANCED and FERVENT, but that they can be SELF-DESTRUCTIVE and MELANCHOLIC. ( tri, 18, she/her, aest )
he’s 172 years old why tf did i do this to myself
honestly, expect half of this to just be copied and pasted from the wiki bc that shit was helpful aF. if anything here doesn’t make sense go check that out, otherwise i’m just fillin in some gaps too.
ok enjoy
oh also just to continue my tradition of labelling my charries (see: lydia) stefan is a bottom. i hate him.
BACKGROUND
oh my god nvm i’m regretting this already
okay so ya boi was born on november 1, 1846
this is canon and at first i was gunna argue him being a scorpio but then i saw this and changed my mind:
strengths: resourceful, brave, passionate, stubborn, a true friend
it fits!! so he’s a scorpio now thanks for stopping by
born to a fairly wealthy family, stefan was deemed the favourite child almost immediately. even as a baby he was quiet, gentle and obedient, and even his pos father fell in love with him.
he knew his father was a pos tho. when he was five he witnessed him burn his brother’s hand with a lit cigar as punishment for a crime damon didn’t commit. it was traumatising, to say the least, but most of all it taught stefan that his father was no one to mess with.
damon would learn to take the brunt of their fathers abuse, and stefan would forever be grateful for his brother for constantly defending him.
if it wasn’t clear before, damon and stefan were tight as shit as kids. damon was stefan’s bff, and despite the favouritism stefan was shown from a young age, he was sure that damon felt the same. they were thick as thieves!! bros before hoes!! damon broke his nose once but it was an accident!! they loved each other!!!!
their mother, lillian, fell ill with tb when stefan was 12. although he loved his mother dearly, stefan started to avoid any contact with his mother simply because he didn’t want to see the woman he loved more than any other so weak and frail. he would come to regret this when she eventually died a year later without ever getting to say goodbye
stefan still blames himself for her death as he’d been sent for a cure not long before she was taken away and believes that if he had been faster, she might’ve survived.
sike tho she became a vamp lmao i love this weird family
anywhomst, a few years later in 1863 (now 17) stefan met valerie and julian, a siphoner witch and a vampire respectively though he didn’t know that, and instantly fell in love with valerie. unbeknownst to him, they had been sent by his vamp mum to see if he was doing g, but they weren’t meant to make contact. but.. cmon.. who can resist this boi. so anyway, valerie and him did the do, he lost his virginity, she fell pregnant WHOOPS. julian forced her to leave, a couple months later she sent a telegram asking stefan to run away with her so he went to meet her but damn julian McTortured her and she had a miscarriage and never met up with stefan. fun.
this def was the start of stefan beginning to realise that maybe love wasn’t all that it was made up to be but haha more on that later
1864!! the year stefan’s life went to Absolute and Horrible shit!!
yall know the story. stefan and damon meet beautiful katherine but oh DAMN she a vamp but they dont know that so anyway they both start a relationship with her when she comes to stay with them. fun!!
one particular night when stefan and kath are getting a bit ~freaky~ (for the 2nd time lmao) kath bites him and stefans like um ok!! bit kinky for the 1800′s dont ya think!! and then she goes actually heres the thing im a vampire lmao and he doesnt even have time to freak out before she compells him to forget haha fun. so he wakes up the next morning with bite marks like dam how am i gunna hide this but then memories start coming back and hes freaking out like wtf ur a demon!! but katherines like ~do not be afraid~ and compells him and BAM hes not afraid. noice.
so anyway rumours are a-swirlin’ that peeps are out here wanting to kill vamps and stefan’s like oh no my vampire gf :(( so he talks to his dad and pretends he doesnt know but is also like ‘hey maybe dont kill them’ and his dad basically says fucc u stefan and puts vervain in his drink haha i love parents.
that night once again the crazy kids get a bit ~freaky~ and kath is like haha heres a fun idea!! let me drink ur blood as foreplay!! and hes like ok but then she drinks the vervain in him and like paralyses idk i forget what it actually does. so stefan is like oh no my vamp gf :(( and then daddy dearest comes bURSTING in and stefans like um dad im nakey ok thats not what happened but anyway basically the sheriff takes kath away and orders a town-wide vamp-round-up (sounds fun) and stefan is sad again (always sad tbh)
so then DAMON finds out and yikes things are Not Good. stefans like noo its not my fault so they plan to get her out. they get her out of the cage, then they get shot lmao yikes.
the next morn stefan wakes up like wtf how am i alive and emily bennet is like bebes kath made u a ring and also ur transitioning. stefans like ummm i never drank her blood tho im not into that and emily’s like SIKE she compelled you, you did drink her blood lol.
stefan finds damon and damons like btw our vamp gf was killed in a fire. :((
the bros decide they dont wanna be vamps w/out their vamp gf
but sike!! stefan starts to realise its cool af being a vamp!! i can hear things like my dad and johnathan gilbert planning vampire demise!! oh wait.. so then he confronts his dad and his dad’s like WHAT UR ALIVE and then admits he shot him and stefan’s like um wtf and accidentally impales him with a wooden stake and then is like dam dad ur blood smell good so he drinks it (oh no he a vamp now)
stefan finds damon and is like BRO THIS IS SO FUN I DONT FEEL ANYTHING ANYMORE AND I CAN HEAR THINGS and damon is like bruh ur psychotic but stefan is like NO HERE I FOUND A HOOMAN FOR U TO DRINK and basically forces damon to drink her blood and yikes now damon’s a vamp too. and stefan is like yay now we vamp buddies lets go kill the world!! but damon’s mad @ him and runs away haha noice.
so anyway stefan basically has no control over his bloodlust now. he turns into highkey hot ripper!stefan (def a top) and kills a bunch of peeps, including some founding families lol.
at one point damon finds him and is like bruh, chill and stefan is like no and then damon is lik e im leaving and stefan is like OK I’LL CHANGE but its too late and damon leaves ouch
one night, stefan lays into a camp of wounded soldiers, carefully watched by another, older vamp called lexi! (love a queen) lexi scolds him for being a ripper and teaches him how to be a Good Vampire
so stefan starts to live off animal blood. fun
jesus so much happened in 1864 far out
skip forward to 1912! stefan finds damon yay!
but oh shit damon is a bit cray cray now.
stefan hasnt realised yet so hes like lets go for a drink, bro
but tHEEEEN, damon convinces stefan to drink human blood, and after taking a wee sip he lowkey cant control himself and ends up ripping off her head LMFAOOO. damon is liek DUDE WTF and stefan is like oh no i can fix it but he cant bc u know... he ripped off her head
so anyway we’re back to ripper!stefan
1917, he is coined with the label the ‘ripper of monterey’ after supposedly laying into an entire village. sike tho, turns out it was actually the literal devil but they made stefan believe it was him. he don’t kno that yet tho. shhhhhhhh.
1922!! stefan meets nik and rebekah!!
rebekah and stefan get ~freaky~ and at first nik is like nah but then he’s like yea and they all became best murder buddies
one night while theyre partying, the ‘police’ come in with wooden bullets and chaos ensues and rebekah freaks out and nik compells stefan to forget about him and bek. yikes.
katharine is there too but whatevs he doesn’t know that
so anyway later that year lexi finds him again and is like dude wtf and hes like i kno and she tries to teach him again to live off animal blood but this time it takes a while but dw he does it
1942! ! ya boi seeks out damon in new orleans to make amends!!
at first damon is like :(( but then he’s like :)) and after a lot of bro bonding damon’s like bruh imma join you in the war!! and stefan is like yay!!
but lexi is like ummm i think you’ll have a bad influence on stefan and warns damon not to come
stefan is sad and thinks his bro abandoned him again and once again starts to turn on his bro, believing him to be a bad person
briefly in 1960 some girl threatens damon tho and stefan is like nOT ON MY WATCH and stops her so like i guess he still cares for him, he just kind of wishes he would learn to stay lmao
1977!! him and lexi return to mystic falls only for stefan to turn around and say lets go to nyc i hear damon is there and i want him to get his humanity back!! lexi is like nah but we can travel if u want and hes like ok :((
1994!! stefan runs into damon for the last time!!
basically stefan has now officially moved to mysitc falls with his great-nephew, zach, and zach’s pregnant wife, gail, and damon comes in and is like im here to be a Good Vamp. and stefan is lowkey reluctant, but he loves his brother so he’s like okey
but sike damon was McLying and stefan sees the bite marks on gail’s wrist. stefan’s like wow u suck, u really thought u could kill them just bc it would be contained, and takes him away to a lil shed, takes away his ring and is like bruh u gotta chill. damon snaps tho and gate-crashes zach and gail’s party, attacking everyone lmao.
he leaves stefan with the dramatic I WILL MAKE UR LIFE MISERY wow fun
stefan compels zach to forget abt gail and the party in general and takes gail to the hospital where they save the baby and she dies. stefan makes sure the baby is adopted into a good family and all is Good (kinda)
so anyway since then stefan has been living with zach (who doesn’t remember the incident or even that he was married lol) but he’s starting to get a bit restless. i mean, he’s been holed up for like 30 years, only leaving occasionally to travel, and he’s starting to get bored and frustrated
to solve that, stefan has decided to try and blend in as a regular teenager and has just enrolled himself in high school under the masquerade that he just moved to mystic falls to live with his ‘uncle’. noice! (not)
PERSONALITY
a Lot
after everything stefan has gone through, he’s honestly cycled through about 1000 different personalities but let’s just focus on where he’s at now
he’s been drinking purely animal blood for 70 years now, and it’s definitely taught him how to remain balanced and in control. he knows how to reign in his impulses and how to control which emotions he feels the most
but, of course, with his humanity switch still on, what he feels is a Lot. everything he feels, he feels x1000. love, sadness, pain, frustration. you name it, he’s dealing with it.
as a human he was already a very calm, generous, kind soul and basically this has all been heightened as a vamp
the one thing that’s different, however, is that he’s very melancholic. so much has happened to him during his life and it’s had a great, psychological toll on him, and he often goes through spouts of just intense depressive symptoms. he regrets so many things and it’s taken a lot out of him and its where the idea of him being Mysterious and Brooding comes from --- he’s actually just very sad and lonely yo
his opinions about love are... complicated. on one hand, he knows that it was his love for katherine that cost him absolutely everything. and he knows that every time he has loved someone, it has only been taken from him. but on the other hand... he can’t help but feel like a bit of a hopeless romantic. he loves what it feels like to be in love, it’s when he feels most comfortable and most safe, and so as much as he might tell you otherwise, it is always his greatest wish to fall in love. he just wants somebody who accepts him for him yknow... vamp and all.
still hates himself a bit, tbh. every day he has to live with the fact that he has killed entire villages, he has to live with the fact that he took the memories of his great-nephew’s love away from him, he has to live with the fact that he is the reason his brother went off the rails. and it’s enough to make him realise he’s really not that gr8. he’s an Expert at ruining things that might bring him happiness bc he just doesn’t think he deserves it. yikes. im emo.
you’ve suffered enough now, i promise i’m done, if ur reading all this then you LIED but i love you anyway. pls love my son. ty.
