[mlarayoukai-archive]

I refuse to let people forget the time someone on tumblr staff sent a random blog an ask about chubby white dudes

[sirheisenberg]

[stickyeagleducklight]

the amount of love i have for the feminine pink guy in sk8 the infinity is insurmountable.

[existentialcrisistime]

the two moods when working christmas retail:

[archivezinc]

i love thinking about my little fictional guy i understand him like no one else can

[dykemd]

true crime enthusiasts fuck me up “im a true crime fan” like whats there to be a fan of? police incompetence?

[counterspelling]

Me: *getting ready to throw out an empty jar*

Goblin brain: “No!!! *Keep*.”

Me: “What?”

Goblin brain: “kEeP tHe JaR.”

Me: “…what for?”

Goblin brain: “mmmmmmmfff… its purpose… shall be revealed to us… IN TIME!”

[boarcriminal-deactivated2018052]

A Straight: I didn’t know you were gay.

Me: I didn’t know you were straight.

A Straight:

Me:

[blackgirlsreverything]

[spirallingintotheabyss]

Will I die for you? Yes. Will I turn subtitles off for you? No.

[imeverywoman420]

A man on tumblr calling my blog a “pathetic diary”… Bro what do you think tumblr is for. You are a man on a womens website. Worry about that.

[memewhore]

Sometimes I'll be trying to fall asleep and "smork alam" will just pop into my head and I start giggling.

[callmebliss-got-swamped]

This image is now brain roommates with “spinch”

[zoesupreme]

It's important to slap your partner on the ass and say good game after sex. Sportsmanship is a dying virtue.

[pissvortex]

the authoritarian right’s obsession with not jacking off is the funniest thing ever they’re like monks but racist

[cerebromadre]

beats being a godless degenerate from the left

[pissvortex]

[siderealsandman]

I had a dream Guy Fieri survived the nuclear apocalypse as a ghoul and roamed the world in a suit of flaming red power armor looking for the wasteland’s greatest diners drive ins and dives

[schmault-tec]

[summerfelldraws]

@ymirsbian

[itsadamnbeehive]

@the-mad-scorpio

[schmault-tec]

Thanks to this post I have Guy’s autograph

[honeylazors]

@mojave-red

[unclebeanbag]

This is everything that’s right with the world. 

[shiftingpath]

#HE DREW EXTRA FLAMES I LOVE HIM

i love that he’s not only like “oh yeah that’s definitely me and awesome” but also “I would be more on fire”

[jewishdaredevil-deactivated2022]

the sight of men’s tits leaves me feeling weak and restless with lust. i need to be tucked into bed like a victorian woman dying from too little cocaine

[nickandros]

every fucking day i think about bruce springsteen pretending to be gay to avoid the draft and the conscription officers were like. “um. yeah, well. anyway, you had a concussion from a motorcycle accident, which means you failed the physical but. uh. thank you. for that.”

[secifosseluce]

bruce: well well weeeeell sarge. i do love a man in uniform 

officer: you. you don’t really have to do that

officer: you literally have a concussion