This is a fictional short story, unfortunately.
I stood at the fountain in the mall and took a quarter out of my pocket. As I held it flat in my palm, I examined the year printed on it. 2037. I closed my hand and turned it over to the large watch emanating a gentle blue light. There were several digital displays on it, all labelled with different words. I focused on the one marked “Present Time.” That one read “May 17th, 2004 3:22:49 PM.” I smiled to myself. I was on schedule.
I had arrived in this time at precisely 3:30 PM present time. As a safeguard for all my travels through time, I created a reset point policy in which, I would always arrive 5 minutes or more before my desired time. This ensured that should the change I was about to make somehow ends up being worse than what my future becomes, I knew exactly what time to go back to to reverse it. I flipped the coin in my hand a couple times as I patted myself on the back mentally. I knew I was still a beginner when it came to timeline manipulation, but I thought I was a genius for thinking of this policy. If the change I was about to make was bad, I would have stopped myself by now.
I flipped the coin into the fountain and made a wish. Not that I actually believed in those things. What I was about to do was far more powerful than a wish, but the child-like part of me wished for this to work. If it didn’t, I had far more plans in store to make sure my life plays out differently. If it plays out like it did before, I would walk into the game store across from the fountain, and purchase a game that would introduce me to one specific person, and from there, my life becomes years of emotional pain and torment. After that, it just felt like a series of unfortunate events constantly playing out against me. With this new watch to take me through time, maybe I was meant to finally make myself happy.
The reset point requirement was fulfilled, and I stood there uninterrupted. I couldn’t help but feel like this was meant to be. And as luck would have it, I spotted my past self walking into the store. This was it. My plan was to punch my past self in the gut, then steal the game and make a break for it back to my present. I took a step to follow my past self into the store, but felt my arm grabbed firmly from behind, holding me in place.
I turned around thinking I was about to be attacked instead, but as soon as I saw his face, I froze instantly. It was like looking into a mirror that ages you. I recognized my glasses and cleft chin, and the rest fell into place. After realizing what this meant, my body sank a little. My plan wasn’t going to work after all, it seems.
“Does it really turn out for the worse?” I asked.
My future self kind of looked toward the floor, but his grip remained firm.
“I’m sorry, but I’ve been doing this for decades now, and I’ve finally reached the end of my journey. It’s this reset point right here. This is where I have to tell you to destroy your watch.”
My mouth fell open. I just got this, and the possibilities are limitless! Why would I need to destroy it? Why would I go to this reset point not just to stop my past self, but to tell my present self to never change anything. I could only imagine how horrific my future must have become with my meddling.
“Do we.... do we get that bad?” I managed to stutter.
“No. In fact, there were ways for us to have everything we wanted...” he replied, still managing to sound distant and somber while delivering good news.
“But that’s great!” I jumped. “I can’t believe it is going to all work out so well.”
He looked at me like I must have been kidding. “Do you think I’d be here if that was the case, telling you to destroy your watch?”
I paused for a moment. He was right. What else was there?
“Do you remember this?” He spoke as he pulled a folded index card out of his pocket. It was a simple white index card, folded twice, with black lines showing a message within.
My memory was fuzzy, but I do recall that day from my past. I had just bought the game when someone had bumped into me. The card fell to the ground, and I picked it up to return it, but he had disappeared. Out of curiosity, I opened the card to read it, but couldn’t make sense of it. It was a personal message I thought meant for him to take to someone, but I had lost him, so I threw it to the ground and went home. Why did he have it now?
“What does that have to do with this?” I started talking quickly as I watched my past self waiting in line at the register.
“What you’re here to change. The timeline that happened. I’m sorry, but it needs to happen.”
Why?!” I objected, almost loud enough to cause nearby people to stare.
“Yes, there are timelines where everything works out for us and we get everything we want. But it comes at a price, and I made the mistake of finding that out. I began jumping down every time line, every possibility, seeing how we were different, and seeing how the people we impacted were different. This may be hard to believe, but..” he paused for a moment, as if doubting his next words. “...but there are people who need you. And not a different you. The broken you. The you who suffered. The you who knows exactly what pain feels like. If you get what you want, some of those people.... well, some timelines didn’t end well for them.”
I stood there, thinking hard about his words. That’s when it hit me. He looks like he had aged almost 30 years. 30 years he traveled through time to figure out the best course for his life, my life, our life, to come to this conclusion. A couple minutes ago, I thought I was a genius for coming up with time travel protocols, but now I was about give up my chance at being happy to go through the pain that had haunted me for years.
The more I thought about it, the more it hit me that there were people I feel like I helped, but may not have noticed. All because I could empathize with them, and I was available to be there for them. Some of those people I grew close to. Others were passing through and just needed a helping hand. I didn’t know what to say, honestly. My arms just fell limp to my side and I stood there, staring at him. He slowly let go of my arm, and began to walk away. I was content to watch him leave, but I tilted my head in confusion as he walked straight toward my past self emerging from the game store.
My eyes widened as I saw him collide shoulders with my past self, dropped the card to the floor, and walked around the corner into a service closet. The crack below the door quickly flashed blue before fading. My future self returned to where he had come from. I watched as my past self picked up the note from my future self, then once more, threw it to the ground in confusion and walked off. Everything had played out as it had once more. I changed nothing.
I walked over to the card resting on the ground, partially open. I bent down to pick it up. It was still hard to believe it was me this whole time. I had done this to myself. I put myself through my own hell. But as I read the card, I felt my resolve grow a little stronger. It was good to know that in my future, I still knew exactly what to say. I folded the card and put it in my pocket, someday to give to my past self once more.
“It’s going to hurt. You’re going to go through so much, and it is really going to hurt. Some days, it won’t hurt as much, and on others, you’ll put the gun in your mouth. But there are people that need you. There are so many people who will need your strength, your thoughts, or your heart to help them in their darkest times. I’m sorry. It will never be easy, but looking back, you’ll know it was always worth it.”
I laughed to myself quietly. I guess you never grow out of being cheesy or sappy. I hit the switch on my watch and disappeared.
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