*human noise*

Hi I’m awkward

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

I just want a really cute girl to smile at me and make me feel happy about life.

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

Men are really out here never having to squat over toilets

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

Hey i got a question

Why is it always such a hot look when people have short hair and black painted nails?

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

This bitch empty

„This bitch empty🙁“

I whisper as I fling my body into a neverending abyss

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

My brain is fucked

Ok my fellow humans listen the fuck up. I, for the first time in about three weeks got more than 6 hours of sleep.

Now, it was clear that I’m not used to that and so I went through the day feeling kinda weird.

And then...

At lunchtime I bite into a fucking apple, right?

And my brain ist just like...

*hmmm... this actually tastes a lot like apple juice*

And to me, that was a extremely motherfucking interesting experience and so I turned to a friend to be like, jo check this out, ya know

And then I’m like, OH FUCK WAIT.

ohmystars I’m a disaster

[toastbutteregg]

[mysharona1987]

[peridotsstuff]

This is a real weird attempt to brand people as hypocrites for not objecting to something 68 years ago.

[pacificrim-archive]

what kind of nerd gives a shit enough about superhero movies to make such a needlessly passive aggressive tweet like this 

[bunniope]

why the fuck are there not singing cowboy movies anymore

[idek-anymore46]

If kinetic energy can be converted to thermal energy, how hard do I need to slap a chicken to cook it?

[dino-spine]

[lovelyardie]

BUENOS DIAS MARIO

[chumblruser-deactivated20260601]

HOW THE FUCK DID HE FIND THE SPECIFIC HEAT CAPACITY VALUE FOR A RAW CHICKEN

[lovelyardie]

You can do similar experiments with bomb calorimetry

[unlimitedmordredworks]

[quartzblock]

this is a pro-fortnite blog

[hey-i-moved-blog]

op do you take constructive criticism

[quartzblock]

nope! it’s hypocritical and mean-spirited to make fun of fortnite just because it’s popular and then turn around and think about how glad we all are cringe culture is over so we can indulge in our own safely re-popularized interests!

this blog is pro-fortnite! 😊 i’m glad so many people enjoy it! it must be a good game!

[al3xp3rsonal-deactivated2025041]

the problem with fortnight is lootbox systems increase gambling behaviours in children :/ 

[quartzblock]

this is true! that’s a huge issue i’ve heard about before.

when i made this post i didn’t have that in mind, i was just thinking about the ways i’ve seen people crack jokes just because “lol fortnite”.

and if i may be so humble as to take a guess, many of those jokes aren’t motivated by the genuine flaws in the game, but just by the fact that it’s a popular game (particularly with kids) and so that’s where my indignation bubbled over. i hope that makes sense!

[al3xp3rsonal-deactivated2025041]

ah ok! yeah, people making fun of kids is not good, other than the lootbox feature, its ok.

[quartzblock]

totally! thank u for mentioning that, it definitely is something to keep in mind when having a conversation on the subject.

[conversetheatrekid]

This is the most civilised post on the internet

[ink-the-shitposter]

Ive seen a lot of modern Minecraft fans say things like “I’m glad I grew up playing Minecraft and not fortnight” and it’s wild to me because it’s like they don’t remember their own interest being called cringe at every turn during the time it was as big as fortnight.

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

MOST.FRIENDLY.POST.EVERRR

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

I follow this page on Facebook called Toilets With Threatening Auras and well…

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

[virusmnd]

i wish i hadnt seen these

[itsphillipbitch]

I’m WHEEZING

[whoredrigo]

that wendy’s origami from hell shit made me legit JUMP

[daddyslittleprincess118-blog]

romanticizing mental illness is dangerous and misleading

[restroom]

Artsy depression: haunted eyes, good at art, emo hair and eyeliner on point

Actual Depression: bloodshot eyes, no longer trust themselves with pencils, has not showered in five days

Quirky OCD: organized books, clean room, color coordinated outfits

Actual OCD: Intrusive thoughts, flipping the light switch 8 times so you don’t stab your brother, picking holes in your skin

Cute eating disorders: Slim trim and beautiful, shyly refusing a second helping, dancer aesthetic

Actual eating disorders: Puffy cheeks and eroded teeth from excessive vomiting, hair growing over your freezing body and refusing to eat carrots because they’re too high in carbs

Adorable anxiety: just a smol bean, soft, must be protected from the world

Actual anxiety: crying so hard you throw up, shaking, losing sleep over a period after the “okay”

RPG PTSD: flashbacks, vietnam, u don’t know what i’ve been through kiddo

Actual PTSD: Buying your first pregnancy test at twelve, flinching at high fives, i can’t feel my hands where am I what year is it

Cartoon ADHD: look a squirrel, something shiny, fidgety loveable bufoon

Actual ADHD: rereading the same page over and over because it doesn’t make sense, hasn’t done the laundry in four months, hyperfocusing on a mushroom knowing you have work to do

stop making terrifying realities seem cute. it’s disrespectful for those of us who are actually struggling

[opinionated-truscum]

Fucking preach.

[stop-stalin-and-suck-my-dick]

Uwu smol baby autism: adorably awkward, huggable, acts cute when confused, has some sort of rainman talent and a perfect memory in general

Real autism: worrying about whether you’re interpreting people’s cues correctly/making your tone sound correct for the context, or whether they’re about to get wierded out and uncomfortable bc of something you said, sensory issues that drive you nuts, not being able to adapt to sudden changes in plans and freaking out, melting down or shutting down when stressed by stupid things

[notsocuddlefish]

^

[marblesandbouncyballs]

Reblogging for the autism part that is just too real 

[c--o--l--o--r-moved-deactivated]

!!!

[cheeriocat-blog]

I would not have started using unhealthy coping mechanisms if people hadn’t romanticized them

[all-hail-mono-onion]

I would not have started using unhealthy coping mechanisms if people hadn’t romanticized them

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

Neigh neigh motherfucker 🎃

[jokesontoast]

There are only 2 genders

Please people thee are only two genders…. I can’t believe that Tumblr is allowed to exist and make up all these ridiculous identities and not have all its users in mental health facilities. 

[magnumbot-deactivated20240227]

someone reblog this with the two real genders because this guy sure as heck didnt specify

[09nerorelatable]

Pokemon and Digimon

[horuss-moved234567865-deactivat]

sun and moon

[miyushinoharaofficial]

super trans and mega trans

[mcfucko-deactivated20180520]

chungo and scrungus

[dfbdbdghngfnfgngfnghfghghfh-dea]

salt and pepper

[inter5tellas]

Neither and both

[followpearlpinesnotthisblog]

Nintendogs 1 & 2

[goth-gay]

handmaiden and fuedal lord

[filthyheretic-deactivated201901]

Birdemic: Shock and Terror and Birdemic 2: The Resurrection

[thatstoomanypilots]

Team lads and team gents

[fuckyouroosterteethproductions]

Achievement Hunter and Funhaus

[thresholdofzero-deactivated2018]

Khal Drogo and Not Khal Drogo

[jupitersaurus-deactivated201807]

Mario and Luigi

[funkpunkandrollmuhfucka2]

Tom and Jerry

[boy-and-girl-crazy123456]

Ass and tiddies

[cultural-goldmanism]

Star Trek and Star Wars

[yteicosanievilew]

Simon and garfunkel

[realvladimirlenin-deactivated20]

Primmie and techie

[bintilleil-deactivated20200510]

Marina and The Diamonds

[butchmachine]

Grump and Not So Grump

[twynkdeth]

Bread and butter

[fsthhdwefg-deactivated20180515]

Ramones and Clash

[mockiato-deactivated20200315]

Coke and Pepsi

[bcpk-deactivated20210131]

Skype and Oovoo.

[psychophancy-deactivated2021072]

Derek and The Dominos

[irltrash]

the proletariat and the bourgeois

[iamfuckingtrash]

feudal lords and handmaidens

[soulsingerinasessionband]

Dungeons and dragons

[gaylawyersmoved-deactivated2020]

narumitsu and narumayo

[acecourses-blog]

kinder and milka

[don8boost]

benny and the jets

[discourseofficial]

florence and the machine

[you-arent-queer]

shrek & the bee movie

[movedto-sceneboyfriend]

Xbox and pc

[melskunk]

Crystal Gems and Homeworld

[bakabun-deactivated20230829]

Naruto & Sasuke

[soft-pink-wilfy]

Ben & Jerry’s

[kotilae]

Offense and Defense

[panic-at-the-badger-burrow]

Peanut butter and jelly

[booksarebetterthanpeople]

Coffee and tea

[catgirlwerewolf]

Owl and city

[drafted-to-the-skeleton-war]

Lamb and beef

[gonda-deactivated20210511]

My type and not my type

[lahnce-moved]

Ihop and Denny’s

[thespace-dragon]

Mcdonalds and burger king

[tryforce-deactivated20211211]

Coke and Pepsi

[clownfactories]

Jedi & Sith

[blaxkula]

Sharks and Jets

[transicon]

sans and komaeda

[g-mecube]

Joestars and Brandos

[wulfric-schwarzfell-deactivated]

Alliance and Horde

[lamafeeling]

Valor and Mystic

[irvine--kinneas]

Dipper & Mabel 

[somebody-anxious-deactivated202]

Ruby & Sapphire

[sludgebat]

nutritious & delicious

[anti-transphobia]

furries & scalies

[morag-thong-deactivated20180914]

Overwatch and tf2

[the-wicked-rad-and-hella-deacti]

ocean and sky

[official-contrabassoon]

Paydays and Whatchamacallits

[howdramaful]

Fred and George

[incorrect-ii-quotes]

team epic and team chicken leg

[icemintfreeze]

Inanimate Insanity and Battle For Dream Island

[ask-joey-drew-deactivated201705]

ruby and sapphire

[stf-archived-deactivated2020100]

*.Flowey and Asriel.

[lunaria-tsukano97-deactivated20]

Undertale and FNAF

[donna-dot-paella]

Gryffindor and Slytherin

[trollyxzx]

Salt and Sugar

[kiseki-kisetsu-deactivated20180]

μ’s and Aqours

[pointlessfoxglove]

Black and white

[lukalino]

Apple and android

[join-the-doge-side-luke]

Mini and Wumbo

[sorta-phantastic-deactivated202]

Dan and Phil

[amazingaveru-deactivated2018121]

DARN IT I WAS GONNA DO DAN AND PHIL @sorta-phantastic

[scumbagsblog]

Hobo and Glunkus

[lostqueenambrose]

Ketchup & Mayo

[impossiblerebelblaze]

chocolate and vanilla

[gothicway]

ketchup and mustard

[nucl34rb0y]

Grandes bites à viande

[tinycinnamonbun]

Batman and robin

[thezachsterisawesome]

Marvel and DC

[scp-1337-deactivated20181215]

Markiplier and Darkiplier

[cnjandhdonejxksndh-deactivated2]

humans + dancers

[jevilcore]

Trans and Turbo Trans

[goopy-amethyst-deactivated20250]

gamers and goths

[toothworms-deactivated20201228]

chardelia and whizvin

[millidew]

Jesse and James

[mcchillmydude]

Buttered popcorn and not buttered popcorn

[sweetest-garlic]

Goths and preps

[flutejesus]

people who blow and people who poke

[piccolojesus]

Euphoniums and tubas

[flower-beaannn]

Night and day

[grandtheftcanoe]

Shirts & Skins

[panicforthefangirls]

The flash and The Arrow

[justinshow]

Leg and dary

[ladeedayda]

Hot and hotter

[buttonheart]

Drake and Josh

[digilici]

Lapis and Peridot

[derovalfnolem]

Snails and moths

[yehudah]

popuko and pipimi

[aceofsquiddles]

Mechanoid and hologram

[greencow]

Violin and viola

[newyorkcitywater]

Treble clef and bass clef

[nikomorti]

Pork and Beans

[sword-and-nightingale]

Butch and Sundance

[maybound]

google chrome and internet explorer

[some-dragon-bastard]

Starbursts and Now and Laters

[chipminkle-deactivated]

Good Chocolate and Dollar Store Bullshit

[d3v1lm4nluvr]

Koreans and Asians

(A girl asked my bf if he was Korean or Asian and I saw this and I had to lol)

(He is Chinese btw lmao)

[lucifers-perfect-angel]

Angel and demon

[evenlyna-deactivated20220405]

Uchiha & Senju

[franthehorsegir]

Lucifer and Michael

[tricksterarchangelgabriel]

Nickifer & Michifer

[anxiety-mushroom]

The Final Pam and Metal Husband

[kiwismoon]

Yes or Yes

[frogseyy]

McDonald’s and Wendy’s

[smooththegoofyshark]

Chopsticks and Forks

[gaudfish-naudsm]

Eldritch and god

[strawberr-ymilkshake]

I wanna know what kind of drug beauty gurus/ influencers are on to b so excited about a fucking sponge or if a highlight is good. I want that 4 my every day life. I mean I’d get slapped a lot but even that would give me extra adrenaline and I’d probably get excited about the manicure of the hand slapping me or smthng.