When going vegetarian, you are literally quitting cold turkey.
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@strawberri-rain
When going vegetarian, you are literally quitting cold turkey.
10 minutes around a 3 year old has reminded me of why I hate children.
They call it a Beaver (vagina) because it eats Wood (penis)
If that were true then the wood wouldn’t keep coming back for more.
My mom JUST noticed her iphones control center and is like OMG I have a flashlight!?
My mom just admitted that when my dad bought a NES years ago that she was addicted to Super Mario Bros but then she had kids and stopped playing. That’s sad.
My cat is more particular about what side of the bed (the right) she must sleep in than I am.
Even with all the new video games out there I’ve still spent the last few days playing Golden Sun and am now playing Mega Man Battle Network.
Dammit, Carl!
My favorite pastime is watching people self destruct online
It’s amusing when people delete fb posts that have caused big long comment sections because they said stupid stuff and it’s like deleting it is literally the worst thing you can do
My Cat’s Schedule
6:30: Get up and meow until someone gives her wet food
6:45: Meow mournfully about how the food is all gone
7:00: Meow until grandma finishes her cereal and she’s given the bowl
7:05: Sit watching for mother to wake up
7:30: Meow until mother finishes her cereal and she’s given the bowl
7:40: Sleep
1:00: Meow to be let outside
1:05: Lie in sun
(if it’s cold) 1:10: Meow to be let back in
(if it’s cold) 1:25: Meow to be let back out --> repeat 20 times
3:00: Come back in and nap
6:00: Beg to go for a walk
6:05: Beg people for (human) food
7:00: Scratch furniture
8:00: Nap
10:00: Harass people for food
12:00: Sit on mother’s face
12:30: Be annoyed when mother uses the bathroom and wakes her up
My friend’s ex had a baby and they named it Maverick Pearl.
Mom: My english muffin is still too cold to cut.
Mom: At this rate I'm going to slice my finger off.
Mom: As I get a bigger knife.
In the year 2020 it’s going to 4/20 for an entire month.
Mom says “Oh dear” then laughs.
I cry more watching Disney movies as an adult than I did as a kid.
Just had a dream about someone I went to elementary school with and hadn't seen in a long time so I looked them up and their fb hadn't been updated since 2012 and I'm like "well that's odd for someone in their 20s" so I look them up online and find out that in 2012 they crashed their car and killed someone and last year they were convicted of dangerous driving and are now in jail with several months left on a 15 year sentence. My cat also got eaten at the end by a eagle.
These showed up side by side on my twitter, and I was so confused because I thought they were connected at first...