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@strikeonthelasthour
Honestly
Talking to you is like constantly trying talk someone off the ledge.
Once you step back....it's just empty again.
We have to wait for the tension to cool down and the awkward transition into normal to warm it's way back in. Fake.
I'll pretend there's hope in ignoring the fact that I grasping at sands.
And you'll have me when it's convenient to then peel yourself away again once it becomes difficult.
Success.
I wish I knew what these dreams meant
My stomach is churning. I don't know if I'm broken or relieved. Broken would indicate that there are larger pieces that could still be put together. Like a defective puzzle. Still I hold on as I watch everything pick up like sand in the wind. I see my name clear as day when your words don't make sense. You're not a martyr and it's not a sacrifice when you bail when things gets rocky. But I'm also losing when I have the best odds behind me. You play one game I start another because I've lost interest in all your rules. Everything has to be a maze. I don't understand these dreams.
Why am I so afraid of being alone?
It's not like anyone ever fought for me to stay or was afraid to lose me.
Some people
Are all about that status and easy lifestyle. I want to be there whether you succeed or fail and just have you love me for that.
I hope in the end everything was worth it
Your love will be safe with me.
Bon Iver (via wordsnquotes)
—“Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself.” - Carl Jung
(via thequotestub)
I've always been second best
That's alright. Knowing who you were from the jump I should have never expected change. That was foolish. Whatever Happens from here on out is my fault.
When you’re going thru shit or when you need me everything is important and the world is crumbling. When I need you whatever. It’s an easy fix. It’s not so bad. Get over it. I’m difficult. I have too many emotions. I’m not less important than you. My problems are not less than yours. We are two sides of the same coin. Yet you’re always superior. We have have the same pain. The same mistrust. The same broken functions. But you bleed more profusely than I do. Your scars are louder than mine. Your anger and ignorance is blinding. I’m left to deal with the aftermath. Go ahead. Look for comfort in all the wrong places. You know I’ll be there to pick up the pieces. That’s how the story goes, isn’t it? Everything has a limit. I’m finding an alternative to this ending. Maybe I can’t handle it. But it’s more then you’re willing.
—“Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it.” - J.K. Rowling
(via thequotestub)
He's not damaged
He's not broken. You don't see him through my eyes. The potential I see in him. He's not a problem. I see his intentions and the struggles he goes through to achieve. The soft spoken boy that doesn't understand but absorbs everything. I have to mold him. I cannot fail him. I understand him because we're the same. I worry because we're the same. I know the damages. I carry the same weight. Another sleepless night. I don't want to be wrong.
Love how I'm not as important
But you always will be
