Big Dick, Bigger heart

None of the stuff I post here is to be taken seriously cool off

[stroketheshaft]

Feelin baaaaaaad

[scenerybook]

[haemus-deactivated20150612]

u kno what’s the best weed …..it’s when I’m weed u

[tachikoma]

[ewock]

meet the skywalkers

[stroketheshaft]

[depressedfemme]

i hate how my mood completely depends on other peoples tiny actions i hate it i hate it i hate it so mu ch

[allurlsarebad-deactivated201506]

Bae: Come over

Me: I’m busy looking at crab memes

Bae: But I’m horny

Me: 

[victini]

[stroketheshaft]

friendly reminder: do whatever makes you happy

[kanekween]

does anyone else get insanely romantically frustrated, like i know sexual frustration is a thing but sometimes i get super intense cravings for soft kisses or make out sessions or cuddling naps or things like that and it’s way more frustrating to me than sexual cravings

[yoursummerdreamz]

[unpretty]

there was a golden age superman comic where someone called a hit out on clark kent, and so a sniper tried to shoot him while he was out having lunch with lois

except he’s fucking superman so the bullets just fell off his chest into his lunch and clark just had to pretend nothing happened and hope lois wouldn’t notice that someone just fucking shot him

the hitman thinks maybe he just missed and gets ready to shoot him again, but then he’s watching through the scope as clark starts to eat the fucking bullets to hide the fucking evidence, acting like everything is totally normal as he noshes down on lead

dude just packs his shit up and leaves town because reporters in this city eat bullets for lunch and he’s not fucking with that no way no how

[everybidenjusthavegoodtime]

you wanna fight? alright let’s take this outside! the stars are so bright tonight. the moon looks so nice. hold my hand

[lizzibennet]

if you think embarrassing shy people on purpose is funny please do yourself a favor and shove a truck up your ass

[onlytwitterpics]

[hotephoetips-deactivated2017080]

i’ma give her this N.U.T.

N. urturing

U. nderstanding

T. rust

[iwantchickenwingz]

i’ma give him the S.U.C.C.

S. upport U. plift C. are C. omfort