struggling

5’6 SW: 160lbs CW: 118lbs GW: 112lbs UGW: 106lbs

[anxietyproblem]

[justlikeparis-deactivated201708]

Reblog if you genuinely think you're fat.

[a-babe-like-ana]

☁️

[pink-lace-snowflakes]

I don’t think, I know

[closet-keys]

My brother was diagnosed with depression years before I was, and because of that he started therapy years before I did.

I still remember when I was a young teen and he was playing a Nirvana song and he stopped it at this one line: “I miss the comfort of being sad”

He told me that when you start to get better, there’s a part of you that misses being sad and that if you start feeling that way you have to be extra extra aware and careful because if you indulge the feeling you’ll go down a self-destructive spiral

And even though that was years and years ago, I think about it all the time. Especially when I’m reading discourse on the idea of getting so attached to mental illness as an identity that you don’t want to improve things because you feel safe in it and don’t know who you are without it

I always think of that line “I miss the comfort of being sad” and my brother’s warning

[wannareachmyugw-blog]

This is so true. I’m terrified to let go of my mental illnesses bc they are me now

[juupajaa]

Me and my ED, planning our bright Skinny™ future together while both are very much aware that I won’t have a future bc I’ll be dead at this rate:

[juupajaa]

Ok this eating thing was fun for a while but now I feel really fat and gross and can’t wait to go back to being

Malnourished and Miserable.

[brokenbeatxndscarred-deactivate]

Something I've realised about eating disorders

No one gives a fuck about you or your eating disorder unless you’re frail and look like you’re dying. Millions of men and women sufferi from ednos, bulimia, binge eating and even anorexia go unnoticed because they don’t “look sick” This is why none of us get help. Because we all feel like we’ll get looked down upon for saying “hey I have an eating disorder” if we don’t look the part. We feel embarrassed to be getting help because we feel like if we aren’t on the edge of death then we’re healthy. Even though we know in our hearts that we aren’t healthy and that we are struggling, our minds, because of society, force us to believe that we shouldn’t recover because we don’t have it as bad as someone else.

[thinspo-and-tea2018]

somebody finally said it

[petalsoftie-blog]

side effects of being numb due to mental illness:

not crying for weeks and weeks on end til one day breaking down over something not actually worth getting upset for

not being able to tell if your feelings for people are platonic or romantic or if you’re just lonely 

instead of caring too much not caring at all about anything 

not being able to process anything going on in your life and when you try your brain stalling out

losing your train of thought every five seconds so when you try to have a conversation having to pause and remember what you were trying to say 

word vomiting 

mind ‘STATIC’

[thinandghostly]

• stuttering more bc you forget how to talk like a normal, functioning human being

• literally breaking down when someone comments on your odd/unusual behavior

• trying to get back into things you like doing but literally cannot find the energy to do them in a way you enjoy it

[vxxvqxxn]

No matter how bad you’re feeling now, eating that won’t make you feel better.

[depressedfemme]

and that’s the tea

[anasuckstho]

the actual worst ED side effects i’ve experienced:

-feeling so nauseous I can’t even sit still or lay down

-having stomach burning, toe curling, eyes clenched indigestion every time I eat something even relatively “adventurous”

-throwing up every time I drink

-eating nothing and still being bloated like I’m 4 months pregnant

-paralysis in my arms and hands after throwing up

-the most agonizing foot cramps I didn’t even know existed

-only ever being either teeth-chatteringly-cold or sweating and burning up

-seeing little hairs on my face under my foundation

-vertigo that makes me want to cry

-the worst insomnia known to man

-skin that dries up and flakes when it’s freshly washed, but stays too oily when moisturized

-being unable to travel anywhere without weed because ana’s side effects are LITERALLY UNBEARABLE for me without it.

Share for those who need a reminder that this life isn’t just thigh gaps and iced coffees.

[wanabeskinnylegend]

Day 1

height: 5′6″ ish (167.64cm)

weight: 105.0 lbs (47.6 kg)

mood: sad

source

[etherealgodesslove]

Zero calorie food brand

Walden Farms

Walden Farms is a food brand that makes zero calorie foods! Tho the food probably doesn’t taste as good as the real thing It’s probably worth it. 100% 

They have foods including peanut butter, chocolate dip, marshmallow dip, mayo, dressings, syrups, sauce, and a few more things.

Finally. Fucking finally. I’m gonna order a few things from this brand off Amazon soon lol I’m so happy!

[thicc-to-stick]

letting yourself binge for a few days and then having to re-train yourself to hate food

[depressedfemme]

just what I went through ! last week I restricted from 400-600 cals for 4 days, and for the last 3 days, I’ve just been b/ping :/

[depressedfemme]

Triggered

My friends went out to eat without me & now all I wanna do binge on every food in sight

[whats-up-my-demons]

whenever someone compliments me

[depressedfemme]

everytime

[ohnoregrettio]

Restaurants Safe Foods Masterpost

Food from my master post, this is just so you don’t have to scroll through the whole thing if you didn’t want to on my masterpost

A&W

Applebees

Arbys

Bojangles

Burger King

Bj’s

Carrabas

Cheddars

Chick-Fil-A

Chilis

Chipotle

Chuck E Cheese

Cici’s

Cracker Barrel

Culivers

Dairy Queen/Orange Julius

Denny’s

Dominos

Dunkin Donuts

Fire House Subs

Five Guys

Fuddruckers

Golden Coral

Hard Rock

In and Out Burger

IHOP

Jasons Deli

KFC

Krispy Kreme

Little Caesers

Krystals

Logans Road House

Long Horn Steak House

McAlisters Deli

McDonalds

Movie Theaters

Olive Garden

Outback Steak House

Panda Express

Panera Bread Co.

Papa Johns

Papa Murphys

Pizza Hut

Popeyes

PF Changs

Red Robins (yuUUMMM)

Ruby Tuesday

Sonic

Steak and Shake

Subway

Taco Bell

Texas Road House

Tim Hortons

Waffle House

Wendy’s

White Castle

Zaxbys

[nicolathenun]

Me: Eat. You have to eat. Its healthy. You’ll not get fat.

I ate.

Me: Oh no! How I could. I’m fat. I’m disgusting. I hate myself. I’ll never eat again.

[rexieblog]

Hit too close to home

[depressedfemme]

Fuck

school was just cancelled & now I have no distractions or excuses to not eat 😞