angel

19 !! ☆ ed nd vent blog !! ☆ wanting moots :3

[strvingangell]

purged my account and restarting HAI INTRO POST !!!

Info ; *.

name ; angel !!

pronouns; he they

orientation ; trans male, mlm

age ; 19

timezone ; GMT (British!!)

My account ; *.

My account is a space for me to vent and talk about ED, hopefully to find mutuals on the same side of tumblr!! I'll talk about ED and SH or just random rants or updates about my life. also just to interact with people and make friends!!!

[strvingangell]

I was doing so well until I decided to drink tonight and had two fireball shooters bro I was so under my c@l limit

[cinnamonsinnerxx]

i feel so fake on here because im actually like fat and evil im sorry im such a Fake

[stpidbvnni]

[strvingangell]

right it's been like a week since I've been here uhm. MASSIVE vent time yippieeeeee

so I got a little better and was eating better right, mainly because I've been out a lot with peopl3 and eating and drinking, but my boyfriend has triggered me back here real bad. which yay I'm back but why did it have to be him

tmi maybe but we've discussed sexual things before, and it's so, clear his attraction lies with skinnier people. People who ate flat and skinny and NOT me. not even saying that because of dysphoria I know I'm not skinny I'm genuinely chubby, I'm L for a lot of my clothes I'm not, what he likes. and that's kind of brought me back to this

that and he was helping me eat this morning and then immedietly started saying how he isn't gonna eat today AT ALL. that he ate a lot yesterday (barely ate) and he'd feel gross eating today. like. idk there's other issues and I don't think I'm happy in this relationship at all but HEY IM BACK HI EDTUMBLR MISSED YOU I think

[strvingangell]

i decides to not wear a hoodie and now I look massive I'm gonna SCREAM

[strvingangell]

I had a massive breakdown last night but at least I didn't b!nge and eat my feelings like I usually do so win I guess. I had like 700c@ls

[strvingangell]

back at uni today which means ⭐️ving is much easier and I might be able to get some more steps in yes god

[strvingangell]

WIEIAD ,*-

didn't fast today I just picked at food!!

baby bells ; 118

strawberry mouse ; 69

sister cooked corned beef pie so I have no idea how many cvlor!es are in it but I estimated 394 or so

after that, I had another snack plate of 2 baby bells and strawberry mouse

all together ; 728 !!

I'm not going to be fasting until Wednesday, which is a day before my birthday. I'll be fasting all day Wednesday and most the day Thursday- back at uni from tomorrow so it should be easier!!!

[1970sbaby]

ana combined with a chronic illness is actual hell on earth

[strvingangell]

WIEIAD .*,

cause I can't sleep

fasted for nearly 22 hours!! longest in a long time, and I'm kinda proud

broke my fast with soup and a baguette and it was nice!! also all I ate today.

I also desperately tried to like chia seed pudding cause EVERYONE raves about it being good for weight loss but I physically couldn't handle the texture </3 maybe I made it wrong idk but I couldn't even handle a spoonful

overall I think today was good!! especially since I've been bad with b!ng!ng and p!rg!ng lately, I feel like I have more control :3

[strvingangell]

19 hours into my fast I went on a walk life is peak

boy dinner

[h3avilymedicated]

i may have a messed up relationship with food but i am NOT fatphobic miss me with that shit

[strvingangell]

almost 17 hours into the fast I started I feel joyful like I could fight god 3 hours to go

my boyfriend also told me last night he's gonna be messaging me reminind me to eat and asking for proof that I am and then he IMMEDIETLY forgot the next day I find that funny

[strvingangell]

haven't fasted in a while so I'm gonna attempt a 20 hour fast and see how I fare