the market was a petty thief's dream or nightmare, depending on the day. lucky for kai they were at least a grand thief or a amateur. good enough to get by most of the time, they never took anything big anyways. like the string of glow and the dark beads, or at least they said they were and while kai rarely thought of others beyond mika, they knew indika would die to have them. so it was just a few slight movements, waiting for the owner to talk to someone else and slipping them into their pocket as they moved away, into the shadows of an awning three stalls down then, along with some of the other patrons. they'd fully intended to keep right on in the direction of the sound factory until it seemed the dread father led them right to an apostate.
"my, my, my, if it isn't a dull moth child. what are those?" they nodded toward the aloe leaves, plucking one away from her to inspect it. "if you're looking for healing, alice. that's not the way to go about it." a smirk tugged at their lips and dropped again, tossing the leaf back to her and shoving their hands in the pockets of their dark hide pants. the truth was, kai hated deserters and while they knew they were supposed to be trying to lure them back into the light, they found an overwhelming urge in themselves to taunt them into submission and shame them for their choices. this is why they weren't ever going to be a speaker and would make a horrible enlightened. "having fun out here in wonderland, little deserter? are the dull ones fulfilling your needs now that you're one of them?"
the grand schism of alice had occurred near two years ago now when the version of herself she longed to be again had died along with wendy. before alice was agreeable, she was sickeningly nice, she braided hair and smiled sweetly and never took anyone's harsh missives to heart. it had been so easy to melt into the culture of the ranch. every day was elation and she'd loved (truly loved, not the shallow almost-love that most people felt) many of her friends. perhaps even kai at some point, bright, sharp, rough around the edges kai who was an acquired taste like expensive coffee. now she felt nothing but bitter resentment and anger as she pulled the pointed end of the leaf out of kai's hand and back towards her.
"it's nice to see you too." her face had gone cold and placid in a way that was very un-alice-like. then again all she'd felt in the two years since everything was un-alice-like. her corporeal form was back somewhere on the ranch still happily singing and picking lemongrass from the field. the girl here now was a poor imitation. she itched to poke and prod, to ask how the ash of her sister's body had tasted on their wind when she'd dragged it in the woods unwilling to let wendy be taken by sky burial. "is that what the dread father wants from you? to bully me back into faith?" she scoffed anger mounting. "i have my own reasons for making the choices i did. my healing is none of your concern anymore."
there is a small enclave the shoots off the main room of remedy roots separated by a few walls. this has become the defacto herbalist's 'office' for all intents and purposes. there are over-stuffed patients files piled high on a desk and scatterings of dried herbs and half-made tinctures everywhere and in the middle, alice zhou - dark hair draped over her lithe frame like a curtain. she's seen four patients already today and her back is beginning to twinge when she hears the ring of the doorbell chime again and bites back a groan. it is on days like these that her empathy is specifically exhausted. "hi." she says, a tight smile on her face as she turns towards the opening. "i'm alice. how can i help you?"
she keeps a small, unimpressive hovel tucked away in the corner of a building with sinking wood floors and ivy growing across every available surface. it's not much to speak of but the windows are wide sunlight filters in, bright as some distant god's face and there's a small balcony with room enough to grow tomatoes and a small personal garden of herbs. alice wraps her sleeves around her hands and sprints nearly running into the small orange cat that sleeps lazily on a threadbare blue quilt. the green pot in her hand is still boiling and holds some sort of stew that she sets between a pair of mismatched plates and silverware. "don't touch it yet." she warns ash a wary eye on him.
the rain spits in fat drops hurling themselves with self-effacing accuracy onto alice's body as she rushes to drag the cracked plastic tubs which had previously held a potato sack's worth of dry dirt. her feet drag in the mud splattering against her worn brown boots and squelching into her socks. alice grunts, dark hair plastered to her face as she drags the last of the tubs over the threshold leaving a wet, dirty patch of floor against the wood grain. it's near the end of the day and they won't be getting many more customers. of course alice always volunteered to stay late - there wasn't much left to do with her time except for work and it helped keep her mind off things. she wiped the back of her hand against her cheek leaving a streak of dirt and began to laugh, softly and lighter than she had in a while. "do you think maybe there's radiation in the clouds and we'll get super herbs?" her smile was easy, as if worry had washed away with rainwater.
i tried to get less specific with these so come at them you animals!
lovegod: slowburn! yearning! romance! alice refuses to let herself love people for fear of losing them but unfortunately feelings don't work that easily. whoever this muse is she's started to catch feelings, it's up to you whether they're requited or not but she's started to distance herself because of her own fears. i'd like a lot of angst and a lot of bad communication between two people who suck real bad at it.
black horse: we're still on the romance train! this is for a child of mothman both former or current. she's slow to get to know people even slower to fall in love but she did with this person! during her twelve years in the cult they found companionship with each other. it's up to you how things ended, maybe she they didn't even end before she left! plenty of room for many things.
the huntress: someone who challenges alice's perception of good and bad. maybe an eaa soldier who she's come to resent over the years. despite this they speak from time-to-time, they engage in philosophical debates challenge each other's perceptions. the could have met through her work as a herbalist or just by chance.
true blue: her best friend!! alice needs a partner in life she can rely on and this person has become it. they're the one person she's comfortable being vulnerable with and also the only person she doesn't lie about her sister's death to. just lots of very sweet supportive friendship and maybe giving each other a good kick in the ass.
your mother's name: alice's naivete and willingness to help have led her into some difficult situations and this one is no different. she found your muse damaged and bruised and now is serving as a sort of on call physician when there's a need for tinctures or herbal remedies to sort something out! whatever happens next we just go with the vibes.
american teenager: alice was a staple in burnington for 15 years before she joined the eclipse. this person would preferrably have come from a different walk of life than her ramshackle cabin in the woods. with nearly two decades between their initial friendship will they be able to rekindle despite their changes?
her dark eyes have grown accustomed to seeing fractures of her past. burnington is rife with them, alice has come to realize she cannot extricate herself from theses fragments unless she were to leave west virginia entirely. a feat that is both financially impossible and emotionally draining. so she grits her teeth and prepares herself to sink into the dirt, rooted in the west virginia wilderness like an oak battered by the storm. she sees kai over a handful of fat aloe leaves she bought with the meager discretionary budget she has for buying herbs for the store. for all her derailing she ends up squarely in their path anyways, two pairs of brown eyes locked in a quiet sort of old-west standoff. she gives a meager, half smile and tugs the aloe closer to her chest - prepared to use it as a distraction maybe. "kai," she tries to look affable but she's sure the effect has fallen short. unable to muster a charismatic line of confrontation she settles on "i think it's going to storm later. you should find somewhere to wait it out."
the sweet scent of a tea mug once you’ve drunk it to the bottom where the sugar rinds it, a rooster’s crow at dawn, finding beauty in the blade of grass that stays on your hand, talking to ghosts out of not fear but deep sadness, the clear sound of chimes. / alice zhou. ( pinterest, playlist )
statistics
full name: alice wei zhou
nicknames: ali
gender: cis woman
pronouns: she & her
sexuality: queer
age: twenty-nine
date of birth: october 14th
zodiac sign: libra
occupation: herbalist at root remedy
affiliation: former children of mothman (two years removed)
mbti: infp
parallels: beth march (little women), waymond wang (everything everywhere all at once), frodo baggins (lord of the rings), will byers (stranger things), jane bennet (pride and prejudice), glenn rhee (the walking dead)
appearance
alice stands at 5'4 with long, dark hair left to its natural wave and dark brown eyes. she wears whatever scraps of fabric she can get her hands on, fashioning them into thick pants and sweaters in the winters and long skirts in the summer. there's a tired quality to her beauty, though she'll always smile at you if your gaze meets it won't always reach her eyes. her hands are always stained with wax or a forgotten smear of dirt and she consistently smells of lemongrass and eucalyptus. she wears a small wood pendant of the sun and the moon that she never takes off. she also frequently forgets to bring hair-ties to work so she'll leave with a pen or a spare bit of cloth wrapped in her hair.
personality
alice, simply put, is a fundamentally kind person. she's always felt a deep empathy and responsibility for the people in her life. she believes it is the social duty of others to take care of those around them. however she has a deep difficulty communicating her feelings especially after experiencing so much loss. she still believes in this kindness but it comes in a medicine you forgot to pick up hand-delivered, or remembering how you like your tea every single time. her communication comes only through these random acts of kindness. she leaves work on time, politely turns down invitations of drinks and resigns herself to isolation. her strict moral compass makes her see issues of survival as black and white, she'd believe if a thief if they told her they stole out of hunger. this naivete can be dangerous for herself and others. alice wants to be angry, she wants to hate her god for abandoning her, hate the world for taking her sister, and hate the people who live happily but she cannot shirk her deep love for humanity despite her best efforts. she is quiet, introverted, and observant but never silent when it comes to justice. despite this her quiet judgement and moral superiority to others can cause difficult situations when alice has made up her mind up about someone without ever really getting to know them. at the end of the day she is paralyzed by her grief and unwilling to look for a way out.
background
TW: murder, cult ideology, sibling death
she had expected a quiet life, even in the annals of what used to be society alice never sight her sights on anything extraordinary. those few goals she had were inspired in the quiet contemplation her parents kept - both herbalists they taught alice and her baby sister alice to be one with the nature that was left. just because the world had changed didn’t make it any less beautiful. it just meant that there was a new type of nature to love. their life was a good one even as they scraped for food. they ate wild berries and made deserts out of sweetgrass.
alice learned to be sufficient for both herself and wendy from a young age while her parents were away trying to work. six years her junior she loved her more tha anything and with swift sureness, alice’s whole life revolved around her. one summer night when they were out late washing their clothes they returned to a nightmare. raider’s had destroyed their home, stolen and burned their meager belongings with their parents still trapped in the blaze. in an instant everything they held dear had turned to ash. with nowhere to turn they lived off the wilderness, that was until they met the children of mothman.
a neophyte found them camping in the woods and offered them warm food to eat and a place to sleep, unable to say no they went with them and found that despite the rumors the community was mired in kindness and generosity. alice and wendy fell into step as neophytes and were quick to adopt the faith and immerse themself in the cult. it was easier than feeling the grief, a new family slotted into the place of the one they’d lost. wendy’s bright personality and spunk was especially beloved as one of the youngest neophytes. despite alice’s care for her in a way she became everyone’s little sister which made the circumstances of her death even more devastating.
alice had trained herself as an herbalist in the steps of their parents and taken to providing medical care for the children. two years ago alice fell ill, it was innocuous at first. a persistent cough that wouldn’t go away, a headache, and then over time she got worse. alice was beside herself. she spent every moment at wendy’s bedside day and night. she tried every combination of herbs and medicine she could. she prayed fervently to the god she’d now dedicated years of her life and belief that if there was anything good in this world her little sister would be saved - nothing worked. after a month of turmoil and sickness alice woke up one day to find wendy’s hand cold and a smile still on her face. everything alice had fought for, everything she’d prayed and dedicated her life for gone just like all those years ago.
alice’s faith shattered under the weight of her grief and it was only a few month’s after wendy’s death she abandoned the cult in the dead of night. she wandered, aimless for a while before getting a job as an herbalist at remedy roots. now she lives a quiet life, overwhelmed still by her empathy for others but unwilling to engage with them on a level other than a fresh loaf of bread or thoughtfully made tincture. she insists to herself that she doesn’t have it in her to lose anyone else and it’s better to be alone with her books, her herbs, and the memories of a life she kept long ago.
wanted connections
thus always to tyrants: alice spent over a decade of her life in the children of mothman. at one time she was a devout believer but after her sister’s death her faith was shattered. it’s been two years since wendy died and she left the cult and she still can’t seem to entirely untangle herself. friends, acqutainces and lovers continue to cross her path and she must ask would it have been better had she never left? was her crsis of faith only momentary in her grief?
blue flame: alice has led a solitary life in the last 2 years for the most part. despite her warmth and affability she turns down invitations for drinks and makes no effort to put herself out there but this is the one connection she’s found fulfilling. they speak in introspective silence and leaving a fresh baked loaf of bread at doors. their understanding lies in the grief and the need for companionship they both carry.
both sides now: alice has found a slight sense of companionship in the clients she treats as an herbalist. somehow they’ve managed to slip through the walls she keeps up and she’s confounded herself with real and true affection for them. despite this some stick out more than others and even subconciously she takes responsiblity for their heatlh.
in general: a few close friends, lots of former mothman connections please, literally anything i will take anything i will brainstorm whatever you want diva.
— zhang ruonan in the first frost e01-03 [ 510 gifs ] ; you can access the gifs by clicking on the source link. feel free to use and edit these as you please but do not use my gifs for any tab** plots. please reblog if you found these useful !
