Random Sentence Starters (Part ???)
“You’ve been listening to the same song on repeat for 3 hours now. Are you okay?”
“Why did you lick the blade?! You just poisoned it you moron!”
“/Really?/ I’m eating here!”
“Can I go /one/ family dinner /without/ a fight breaking out?”
“Since when did you dance?”
“What happened to your face?”
“Uh, you got a hole in your butt.”
“No I’m /not/ buying that for you put it back.”
“Puppy eyes stopped working on me years ago.”
“Don’t give me that sass.”
“Do you got eyes on the back of your head or something?”
“I wasn’t doing nothing!”
“Look, you can rip his arms off /after/ we get the info-”
“Why is your browser history nothing but various methods of killing people and how long it takes?”
“You know, when I said I thought you were hiding something, I didn’t think it was… well… this.”
“I can’t believe you got dunked on by a bunch of toddlers.”
“Do I want to know why you’re laying in the middle of the floor?”
“You’re not bleeding! What more do you want- a booboo kiss?!”
“No, we are /not/ getting a pet. Where are we even going to put it?”
“You got to be the ugliest thing I’ve seen, and I’ve seen a lot.”
“If you vomit over my boots, you /will/ be paying for them, and I /know/ you can’t afford them.”
“If I had a nickel for every time that has happened… I would have two nickels.”
“You’d be a terrible pirate you apologize for accidentally taking the last fork and swap it out for a spoon.”
“If you don’t shut up I will /make/ you shut up.”
“How can you get your voice so damn /low/?”
“That’s it, break time for you.”
“You’re cranky, ergo, you need a snack.”
“I hate sand. It always gets into my boots and then I can never escape it.”