˚࿔ ourania 𝜗𝜚

the dream tilted when i looked up.

[suestrellalunar]

‬ ‪ ‬ ‪ ⠀⠀જ⁀➴ a flower's masterlist 𝜗ৎ

hi, i’m ourania. i write about awareness as it is; direct, simple, without steps or methods. nothing is separate, nothing is becoming. there are no blocks, no waiting, no detours. awareness doesn’t decide or declare; it already is all that appears.

please check my faqs before asking questions. tysm!!

encyclopedia ෆ faqs 𝜗ৎ ʚɞ daydreams of a daisy ink ⟡ cherry blossoms ౨ৎ <𝟑 .ᐟ the flower's bookmark a flower's book of awareness

[suestrellalunar]

saying things all day and watching them come true is insane... every single one of them.. okay then. 15 million in my bank tomorrow. lol."

So, are you saying affirmations all day long? I don't quite get it—does consciousness need to be reminded of what you desire all day for it to become reality? I was under the impression that you didn't need to keep reminding yourself of things you are already aware of—just like how you know the sky is blue. Could you explain this or give me an example, please? I'm confused. Sorry if my English is bad; I'm using a translator. Thanks for your time! 🌸

i don’t do affirmations.

my last post just meant everything i said today came true. nothing about it was affirming for anything.

[emir-kctrk]

Ben çiçek sevgisini babam'dan öğrendim. ve bu bana en zarif vasiyetiydi..

[suestrellalunar]

saying things all day and watching them come true is insane… every single one of them.. okay then. 15 million in my bank tomorrow. lol.

[suestrellalunar]

[suestrellalunar]

saying things all day and watching them come true is insane… every single one of them.. okay then. 15 million in my bank tomorrow. lol.

[suestrellalunar]

i genuinely thought i was going to lose my job because i amended a contract without the principal knowing first (legally, it was fine because both parties had already agreed to the amendment, but… it’s a LEGAL CONTRACT 😭).

when i told him what happened, he just said, “okay, we’ll just keep a separate file for the old contract.”

that’s it. no lecture. no getting fired. no disaster.

never treat the appearance as final, as per your favorite jellyfish. 🪼

[suestrellalunar]

GUESS WHO’S GONNA GET A PROMOTION!??????

[suestrellalunar]

i genuinely thought i was going to lose my job because i amended a contract without the principal knowing first (legally, it was fine because both parties had already agreed to the amendment, but… it’s a LEGAL CONTRACT 😭).

when i told him what happened, he just said, “okay, we’ll just keep a separate file for the old contract.”

that’s it. no lecture. no getting fired. no disaster.

never treat the appearance as final, as per your favorite jellyfish. 🪼

[suestrellalunar]

Heyyyyy your post are life changing

anyway I have a question that you may have of then but I kinda find that I’m having trouble detaching from the ego and like my body ish surrounding while trying for the void state if you respond it would be rly rly extremely appreciated

xxx have a nice day ❤️❤️

you don’t have to detach from your ego, your body, or your surroundings. the one trying to detach is just another appearance in awareness.

if thoughts are there, let them be there. if sensations are there, let them be there. none of them prevent awareness because they’re appearing in it.

what people call the “void” isn’t somewhere you go. it’s simply the recognition of what you already are. awareness doesn’t come and go depending on whether your mind is quiet or your body disappears.

so instead of trying to get somewhere else, notice what’s already here. the awareness that’s aware of the thoughts, the body, and the effort itself hasn’t changed. you don’t become awareness. you already are.

[suestrellalunar]

when you recognize yourself as the awareness behind it all, circumstances stop holding power over you. they still happen, but they lose that grip. you remain the quiet, steady space in which everything appears, without needing to cling or push anything away.

life doesn’t stop happening; it’s that you just know you are the awareness in which it all appears, and desires can arise naturally within that, too.

[suestrellalunar]

Hellooo I hope you’re having a great day !!

I’ve been disidentifying with my thoughts for quite some time now and I’ve recently just started doing the same with feelings since I’ve solely been focused on thoughts and I’ve noticed these intense feelings of dread when I would try to disidentify. And I’ve realized that there is no actual person here it’s just thoughts and feelings coming together to form an “ego.” What I really am is the silence behind all the noise. But after noticing all of this, there hasn’t really been any progress with feeling less separate from others or the seeming “3D” world. And it’s not like it’s desperate need it’s just a curiosity of why it hasn’t happened. I’m not sure if it’s because the knowing isn’t a permanent knowing since during the day I let myself be the ego because there’s nothing it can do anyway.

I was also wondering if letting go of subconscious thoughts like “there is a world” “there is a past and a future” would help because I also don’t understand how the world and body keep reappearing if I don’t have a conscious thought like “there is a world” or “I am this body” upon waking up in the morning.

I would really appreciate any insight. Thank you!!

what you're describing is still based on the assumption that awareness has somewhere to get to. it doesn't.

you're waiting to feel less separate, but awareness has never been separate, it doesn't come and go either. only experience appears to.

there isn't a point at which awareness finally becomes established as itself. it already is.

as for the world and the body, they don't appear because a hidden thought is sustaining them. awareness doesn't need to think "there is a world" for the world to appear.

there doesn't have to be. thoughts appear. the body appears. the world appears. they all appear within awareness. you're not being asked to get rid of them or to stop them from appearing.

you're only being invited to notice what has been present before every thought, every feeling, every appearance, and every seeming absence.

[suestrellalunar]

Hi Sue, I love your posts, but honestly, sometimes I don't understand how you manage to get your dream to change so quickly. I want to change many aspects of my appearance and my life—I want them to change drastically—yet the dream remains exactly the same as it was two years ago. I don't see the dream shifting or feeling any different; everything stays exactly the same—my face and my life in general — and things just keep getting worse. Every night, I think about the life I want to experience; I see it as being so close yet so far away. Sometimes I feel such desperation and anger at not being able to experience that life right now, I also feel that if I don't have that desired face or that desired life, I won't be able to be happy; sometimes I fall into despair and anxiety. Is there something specific you do to make your dream change so quickly? Or is my desire perhaps incompatible with me? Or am I simply too foolish to make my dream change fast? I just want things to appear quickly in my experience. Do you have any advice? Thanks 💓😞

nothing is incompatible with you because nothing exists outside of you.

the only thing making your desire seem distant is knowing yourself as someone who is waiting for experience to become something other than it appears to be.

you say your dream hasn't changed in two years, but awareness isn't measuring time or appearances.

you already are what you've been searching for. that doesn't mean you stop enjoying your desire. experience simply reflects what awareness is conscious of. happiness has never depended on appearances changing first.

there is nothing wrong with you, and there isn't a faster or slower awareness. there is only awareness knowing itself as someone waiting for a future that never actually arrives. what you are has never been waiting.

[suestrellalunar]

a story from pure awareness

this is something that happened to me overnight, and by overnight, literally yesterday.

it’s amusing how the very desire is what shapes the dream, because the dream is constantly shaping, anyway. the desire itself is awareness appearing as movement. once it’s known, the entire field starts folding into its new shape.

there was a time when the circumstance looked dire, like, in the dream-level, it was beyond repair. words were said, things were broken, and logically, it didn’t seem possible to fix. i wasn’t even trying anymore; i was exhausted, playing a silly game to distract myself, not expecting anything to change. (& yes, the person behind ourania/sue still has her moments, full breakdowns, even. and you know what’s funnier? this happened right after one of those breakdowns.)

and then, literally right after that full breakdown (i was even telling myself; "it would be funny if you're ugly crying and things turned out to be okay, anyway. so you're crying for nothing"), the dream turned. the same person who once said there was no way back appeared differently: softer, open again. what seemed impossible dissolved without effort, and the story wrote itself in a completely new direction.

it reminded me that the dream doesn’t need time to shift, it only mirrors the knowing already alive within awareness. the desire isn’t separate from its fulfillment; it’s the same wave folding into form.

so if something looks unfixable, let it. let it appear hopeless, because even that is only awareness appearing as that before it bends. stay in the knowing that the moment the desire appeared, the dream was already rearranging to meet it, instantly, effortlessly, as it always does.

[suestrellalunar]

this is insane. we’re both hitting our first anniversary. 🥹

[suestrellalunar]

Hey, I’ve been understanding that I’m awareness a lot more recently but I’ve noticed there’s intense blips between when im conscious that I am awareness and just being entirely the ego. With life being so preoccupied it’s hard for me to understand that I’m always awareness because I forget constantly. This has left me in a viscous cycle in which I don’t know how to break out off

awareness isn’t coming and going. what’s coming and going is the recognition of it.

you say there are moments when you’re aware that you’re awareness and moments when you’re completely identified with the ego. but notice that both experiences are known.

the feeling of being awareness is known. the feeling of being lost in thought is known. the feeling of forgetting is known… well, what knows them? that’s what you are.

you don’t need to maintain awareness or hold onto it. awareness is present whether you’re having a spiritual insight, scrolling on your phone, stressing about work, or feeling completely identified with the ego.

the cycle only feels exhausting because there’s an attempt to stay in a particular experience. but awareness isn’t an experience. it’s what is aware of every experience.

[suestrellalunar]

What do you mean when you say “happens in experience” isn’t this more in tune with manifestation ie happening within the 3d? Because when asked about seeming things happening in “outwardly” everyone always says that it’s a seeming experience and that all moments are completely unrelated to the other, so how does something “happen fast in experience” if there’s no separation?

when i say things happen quickly in experience, i’m not talking about awareness causing something in a linear way.

i’m also not saying that nothing ever appears outwardly.

the point is that what we call “outward” is still appearing within experience. there isn’t an awareness over here and a physical world over there.

so when something seems to show up, i’m simply noticing that the appearance of it wasn’t separate from awareness in the first place.

and yes, from the absolute perspective there is no time, distance, or separation. but from within the apparent human experience, things can still seem to arise, move, and resolve.

that’s why i can say something appeared quickly without implying a chain of cause and effect. i’m not claiming awareness made it happen.

[suestrellalunar]

Every post I read says something to the effect of, "give up trying to have [insert desired scenarios/realities here]. Awareness does what it does and you must let it be." What is the point if all of this? I feel like I was exposed to these things as some sort of cruel joke. We can't really experience what we want in the physical because what we want we've already seen in awareness and they both hold the same weight? Even though one is felt vividly and is ruining your whole life, and the other is a vague sensation, they're both real and we should be just as satisfied with the vague sensation? I don't know maybe I'm not in the right head space to truly get what I need. I guess if I was ready living a good life I could be satisfied with the idea of my perfect/ideal life.

i don’t think the point is to settle for a vague inner experience instead of living your life.

when we say “it’s already here,” we’re not saying you should replace your lived experience with imagination or convince yourself that suffering doesn’t matter.

we’re pointing to the fact that what you want is not actually separate from you. the desire, the image, the longing, the awareness of it, all of that is already appearing within the same awareness.

that doesn’t mean you stop preferring things. it doesn’t mean you stop caring about your circumstances. it just means the feeling of being fundamentally incomplete until something arrives is questioned.

if you’re suffering, then you’re suffering. nonduality isn’t asking you to pretend otherwise. it’s simply asking you to look at whether the sense of lack is coming from the circumstance itself or from the belief that you are separate from what you’re seeking.

and honestly, if you’re in a difficult place right now, it makes sense that these ideas feel frustrating rather than liberating. they aren’t meant to become another reason to invalidate what you’re experiencing.

[suestrellalunar]

holy, how quickly things seem to show up in experience.

this is why i keep saying everything is already here. there isn’t actually a gap between you and what you desire. the gap is only imagined.

kinda like coffee. you don’t wonder whether coffee exists somewhere out there. when the desire for coffee appears, coffee is already part of your world.

[suestrellalunar]

https://www.tumblr.com/suestrellalunar/818940469375549440/hi-gorgeous-im-new-to-your-page-and-just-last

^ this is me! I was talking about your post regarding on this: https://www.tumblr.com/suestrellalunar/789669198058192896/ourania-how-can-i-immediately-manifest-entering

that’s totally okay!

if you’re tired, sleep happens. awareness isn’t something you have to hold onto or keep yourself in. there’s nothing to force and nothing to get right.