wait... how much is too much?

Professional popcorn chef. Amateur writer. Passable parent.

[nickcarrawaysuggestions]

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Every time.

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Have finally reopened the ol' Etsy shoppe, guys.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Honestly in all of these stories these poetic white men who somehow end up immortal get so bored and miserable because they just sit in their mansion all day doing whatever it is they need to do in order to sustain their immortality and then they just throw lavish parties and organize orgies or whatever and then they’re like “why am I sad I eat three course meals and have at least one orgy daily what MORE could I POSSIBLY need??”

Like???? Damn go for a walk. Do you even KNOW your neighbors? Get a dog and take it to the park. Set up an elaborate fish tank. Go skiing like you’ve been alive for 200 years and you’ve spent 180 of it in your house looking at paintings and drinking wine with other rich assholes no wonder ur life sucks my man.

Buy a canoe.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

this post was specifically targeting dorian grey.

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Make sure than anyone who comes to your place knows that bitches ain’t shit.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/476667959/nikki-minaj-beez-in-the-trap-inspired-4

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Got tired fingers? 

Can’t figure out how to use your phone’s emojis?

Hang this in your house.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/463174266/little-middle-finger-emoji-completeled

[splteen89]

Happy Friday the 13th!

[sunglassesareheadbands]

@5secondsofkerosene

[sodunwithholdingontoyou]

IM OUT

[sunglassesareheadbands]

I'm in.

[truefuckingstorybro-blog]

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Looking for a sweet something stitched right next to something naughty? Or your name? A personal joke?

Get in touch. 

https://www.etsy.com/shop/JaimeEtc

[sunglassesareheadbands]

When you're bored you should just make a tiny cinder block garden.

[theworldinstitches]

[mamalazzer]

The modern adventures of Han and Ben Kylo feat. Leia (Manip AU)

Kylo visits his parents. Guess who his favourite is.

The rest of the series is here

[housefanatics]

House, M.D. Merchandise: http://bit.ly/1sVh7E3

[sunglassesareheadbands]

Made this beautiful picture for @5secondsofkerosene

[mamalazzer]

The modern adventures of Han and Ben Kylo (Manip AU)

In which Kylo laughs at his own jokes and Han feels like he’ll never laugh again.

The rest of the series is here

[belugahr]

[nekoatsumehumor]

Me on Valentine’s Day. #alonefullandhappy

[sunglassesareheadbands]

@5secondsofkerosene