hi! i would love to request a fic where sister!reader is the one dealing with the lucifer hallucinations!!
A/N: Sorry for the wait, hopefully this isn’t too long for you I got carried away
Summary: You just returned from hell but now you’re dealing with hallucinations. Your brothers have to figure out how to convince you they’re real
Pairing: sister!reader x Sam and Dean Winchester
Word count: 7k (it’s a long one I know)
Warning: Mental torture, manipulation, brief mentions of SH
Adjusting was harder than you expected. The cushions on Bobby’s couch compared to the chains in the pit was a big change. It had been a week since Cas managed to pull you out of hell. The transition itself was rough, especially waking up in a gravesite. Physically you were fine…mentally…not so much.
Today marked the seventh day since you came back. You were on the couch, the boys had been sleeping on the floor. The sun crept through the curtains as you let out a content groan. You stretched a little and yawned, face still buried into the pillows. The warmth felt amazing, no loud noises, no pain. Everything felt good…until it didn’t
“Wake up buttercup” your eyes snapped open. You flew up and stared into the kitchen. There he was. The devil himself. He gave you a crooked smiled and waved, slowly wiggling his fingertips
“Good to see me isn’t it” he chuckled and strolled into the living room. You didn’t respond you just watched him make his way towards the couch.
“What? No hello?” He frowned
“You’re not real” you whispered
“Mmm sorry princess, ‘fraid so” he shrugged. You blinked waiting for him to disappear but he didn’t.
“You think you can get rid of me that easy sweetheart? Wheres the fun in that” he giggled and crouched down beside you. “You’re stuck with me” he smiled, stretching his hand out. “Wanna make a secret handshake?”
“Y/n?” Your head snapped towards the direction of the sudden voice in the kitchen. You looked up and saw your brother, Sam, standing there with a worried look. He stared at you for a second before he walked closer
“Yea?” You answered, trying to pretend like everything was fine
“Yea, why?” You shook your head and forced a smile
“I called you like three times, you were busy staring at that piece of lint” he said, pointing at the carpet. There was a piece of lint on the carpet but a certain someone was blocking your view from it.
“Awww should I tell him we’re having a play date?”
He’s not real, he’s not real
“Huh?” You exhaled and scratched your head. Sam took a pause before he continued
“Anyways, I’m gonna go grab some breakfast, you wanna come?” He asked, you glanced back at…him.. before you nodded
“Yea, yea I’ll come just give me five minutes” you threw your cover off and headed into the bathroom. Sam went out to wait in the car with Dean while you got dressed. You quickly threw on a new shirt and started buttoning your jeans when you looked in the mirror and jumped
“You son of a bitch” you growled, he grinned
“I prefer the term sexy but whatever floats your boat” he leaned up against the doorframe, making the wood creek. You took in another deep breath. No. No this isn’t real. You weren’t standing in the bathroom talking to the literal devil. You glanced over at him and he tilted his head
“Temper, and no. I’m not done with you yet silly, you were fun down there. What a screamer” he chuckled, siting down on the toilet seat.
“This isn’t real, you’re still in the cage”
“Am I? Or am I right here?” He let out a sinister laugh. “Doesn’t matter, either way I still win”
“No you don’t” your fists curled and your knuckles whitened
“Hate to disagree with you honey but I always win” you grabbed your brush off the counter and slammed it against the wall. He watched it bounce off the edge of the frame before it hit the ground with a thud
“This is gonna be fun” he grinned
You finished getting ready and started making your way to the car. You opened the backdoor and slipped inside
“Hey kiddo, you sleep ok?” Dean asked, glancing into the backseat
“Yea, yea I slept fine” you lied, realistically you spent the whole night tossing and turning. He nodded and gave you a warm smile, he’d been so happy since you came back. He started the car and drove out of the yard. The rumble of the engine and the faint sound of the radio was a comfort. The seats felt familiar and so did the smell
“Boo” you jolted and let out a quiet gasp
“Oop, sorry didn’t mean to scary you bunk buddy”
“Y/n? You alright?” Sam asked, he was staring at you through the rear view
“Yea sorry just uh- saw a bug on my shoe”you lied
“In my car?!” Dean asked, you nervously chuckled
“That was a good one” Lucifer nodded “very creative”
“She said shut up to me” he held his hand to his heart and pursed his lips. You took in a deep breath and squeezed your hands together.
“Sing sweet nightingale, sing sweet nightingale” he started practically screeching. You groaned and tried to plug your ears but it didn’t do much.
“Can you turn the radio up?” You blurted, Dean raised his brow but nodded
“Sure thing” thankfully he had been very pleased to do whatever you asked of him recently. He cranked the music up and Enter Sandman started blasting through the speakers. Lucifer whined and folded his arms together before he disappeared. You let out a sigh of relief and tried to enjoy the obnoxiously loud song
“I’ll do the pancakes and eggs with a side of pig” Dean said with a wink, the waitress smiled and looked at you.
“You know, I never understood humans. Imagine eating something so…vile” Lucifer scrunched his nose up at the menu
“Huh?” You looked over at Dean who was motioning for you to address the waitress
“Oh sorry” you shook your head, your cheek flushed
“No worries, what can I get for you” she gave you a welcoming smile and held up her pen.
“Uh, just the single stack” you said
“Yea no, she’ll take the same as me, scrambled” Dean corrected, the waitress chuckled and jotted it down
“Hush, you’ve barely had anything for the last week”
“It’ll be right out” the waitress left and the boys attention went back to you
“So how you feeling?” Sam asked
“Why don’t you tell him about last night” you clenched your jaw at the nagging voice beside you
“Bout how I weaseled my way all through that pretty head of-“
“AHEM” you cleared your throat loudly to try and block him out. He giggled and scooted closer to you. The boys were both siting on the other side of the booth. Unfortunately that meant your side was wide open for Lucifer
You spent the next ten minutes trying to drown him out while simultaneously listening to your brothers. When the food finally came you let out a sigh of relief.
“Here we go” the waitress handed you each your plates and left you alone to eat. Sam unfolded your fork and handed it to you softly. You cut a piece of your pancake and went to take a bite. The taste was amazing, buttery and soft. Just how you liked it. You went to take another forkful when you almost choked on the first. Your plate was now suddenly covered in maggots. They were a sick yellowish color, fat, and slimy.
You coughed and covered your mouth, forcing your body to shallow. You heard a chilling cackle and watched Lucifer throw his head back with a smile
“Y/n? What’s wrong?” Dean asked, setting his fork down
“Nothing” you mumbled, suddenly feeling ill. “I’m gonna- I gotta use the bathroom, be right back” you quickly excused yourself ignoring your brothers questions. You stumbled towards the bathroom and locked the door. You looked up in the mirror and wiped your face. Your eyes had started to water and your nose was already turning pink. You quickly turned on the faucet and splashed some water on your face.
You grabbed a paper towel and held it against your eyes for a second. You dried your face off and looked back in the mirror before you let out a quiet yelp
“Was that too much?” Lucifer asked, he was standing in the corner with his arms lazily crossed. You sniffled and turned around. He made a strange face, almost like a grimace before he stuck his finger in his ear and twisted it.
“Oh- hold on lemme” he held his other hand up while he continued to twisted his finger. You practically puked when he slowly pulled out another maggot from his ear.
“Hmp” he muttered. “Sorry about that” he “apologized”.
“Embarrassing” he said, flicking the worm across the floor. It landed near your feet making you jump. You turned around and slammed your hands against your ears
“It’s not real, it’s not real, not real, not real” you chanted
“I don’t know why you keep saying that” he sighed. “It’s really hurtful, I feel under appreciated”
“Should I call her?” Sam asked, Dean took another bite of his eggs
“I don’t know, she’s been in there a helluva long time” he mumbled, mouth full
“I’m gonna call her” Sam pulled his phone out and dialed your number.
You were on the verge of a panic attack when your phone range. You frantically fished it from your pocket and looked at the caller ID
“Hey you ok in there? You’ve been gone for like ten minutes”
Ten minutes?? You couldn’t have been-. You glanced at the time
He was right. You left the table at 11:05 you’d been in the bathroom for nearly twenty.
“Sorry, I got sidetracked I spilled the soap all over my shirt. Been trying to wash out the suds” you lied
“Oh alright, take your time just checking on you”
“K, bye” you hung up and glanced over at the soap.
“She said she spilled soap on her shirt” Sam said with a raised brow. Dean hummed and tilted his head
“Eh, sounds like something she’d do, just give her a few more minutes” he shrugged
You sighed and grabbed the soap bottle
You dumped it out on the bottom of your shirt, making sure to scrub it into the fabric. You put it under the sink and started to wash it back out. It only two a minute to clean off but the water stain and the smell would be enough proof. You left the bathroom and joined your brothers back at the table. They both gave you a look, like they were scared to ask you if you were ok again. Like you were a piece of glass
“I’m fine” you sighed, they went back to eating and struck up another conversation.
“I don’t think she’s ready to get out there yet”
“Me neither, we should take a couple more days off”
“Hey” you walked into the living room, interrupting your brothers conversation
“Hey” Sam smiled at you but you could tell you had just caught them discussing something secretive
“What are you talking about?” You asked, you strolled into the living room and sat down next to Dean.
“Uh…” Sam looked to Dean for backup before Dean cleared his throat
“We were thinking… we want you to take a few more days off”
“Just a couple, make sure you got your sea legs” Dean said softly
“Dean I’m fine, I wanna hunt”
“We know you do kiddo, but you’re jumpy and exhausted. You need sleep and a few more days of lazing around won’t hurt” Sam said
“No, I said I’m fine, besides there’s already case” you motioned towards the table.
“What the spirit? We talked about that, Sammy’s gonna go out with Bobby and take care of it” Dean said, he gently pat your knee
“Why make Bobby go out on a case like this, you know he hates field work. I’m fine, I’m capable, let’s just go”
“I’m with her” your heart skipped a beat and your body immediately tensed. It took everything inside you not to flinch. Lucifer was siting directly beside Dean, his face was inches away from Dean’s ear. Your jaw clenched and you shallowed hard.
“What? Devil got your tongue?” He whispered
“Y/n?” Dean cocked his head slightly
“Hm?” You hummed but it came out more like a fragile whimper
“You alright?” He asked, wondering what your eyes were zoned in on.
“Yea, I just remembered I left the tap on upstairs” you quickly jumped off the couch and jogged to the staircase. You started skipping steps to make it up faster when you heard another pair of shoes behind you.
“Where we going?” You cringed at the voice and kept moving. “Oh cmon Y/n don’t do that, we’re bunk buddies, pals, remember?” Lucifer whined, chasing you up the stairs. You finally reached the bedroom and slammed the door in his face. You stood there for a moment and took in a deep breath before you turned around
“What did we talk about” you jumped and pushed yourself against the door. Lucifer was siting on your bed with that same cruel smile he always had. He huffed and laid his elbows on his knees.
“You know, this might be my best work yet” he chirped
“Make you think you got out, let you off the hook for a few days, then pull you right back down” he said, snapping his fingers together
“What? You really thought you escaped? I told you Y/n there’s no escaping me. You’re still in the pit, still rolling around in the cage. I got my little finger wriggling around in that big brain of yours” he chuckled
“Am I? Am I not real enough for you sweetheart” he hummed. “Ok, how about this” he snapped his fingers again and suddenly the entire room filled with bright orange flames. Your eyes went wide as the fire flew up from the floorboards. You jerked and tried to jump over the burning carpet but it followed you all the way to the other side of the room.
It was hot and filled your room with smoke in seconds. The flames crawled up to your shoes before they eventually caught fire. Your feet started to burn and blister, you yelped and tried to smack the fire out but it only burned your fingertips. You could hear his laughter increase as you pushed yourself into the corner of the room.
“Real enough for you now!” He shouted before the door busted open and the flames disappeared
“Y/N!” You froze. You glanced up and realized both of your brothers were standing in the doorway with their guns drawn.
“What the hell!” Dean yelled
“When we call you answer! You open this damn door you hear me!” He shouted
“No Sam she could’ve been getting killed for all we know” Dean snapped
“I’m sorry” you whimpered
“Sorry doesn’t cut it Y/n, you scared the crap outta us” he panted, shoving his gun back under his belt. He grabbed the doorknob and shook it. “This door stays open. Understood” he barked
“Yes” you said quietly, Dean stared at you for a few more seconds before he stormed off. Your eyes immediately watered, you tried to cover them but it was useless. You sunk to the floor and curled your knees up to your chest. You heard the floor creak so you squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t handle it again
“Y/n?” That voice sounded familiar, you looked up, nose red, eyes puffy. Sam was crouched in front of you with a sad empathetic eyes
“Hey” he said softly, seeing your face stained with tears. He pulled you into his chest and cupped the back of your head. “It’s ok, I’m sorry, he shouldn’t have yelled like that” he apologized
“No don’t apologize it’s ok. Dean… he’s just worried about you ok? He thought…” he trailed off “just don’t do that again ok?”
“Ok” you whispered, Sam held you for a couple of minutes before he addressed the obvious.
“Now” he started, pulling you away gently. “What was that about?” He asked, you leaned up against the wall and sighed
“Y/n. Don’t lie to me again” he said sternly, you paused
“Y/n?” Your heart stopped, there he was again, on the bed behind Sam. “Cmon now don’t be coy”
“I um…” you tried to articulate the situation. “I’m seeing things”
“What do you mean seeing things?” Sam questioned, he sat down on the floor fully.
“Things that aren’t real, things from hell” Sam paused for a second before he nodded
“What kind of things?” He probed
“This morning it was maggots” you confessed
“Maggots?” Sam’s brows furrowed
“Yea, in my food. That’s why I took off to the bathroom”
“Oh sweetheart” Sam sighed and grabbed your hand. “What else”
“Well, just now it was… it was fire”
“Yea, that’s why I couldn’t open the door” you said
“Y/n” he signed and pulled you into a hug. “Is that it?” He asked, stroking your hair back to comfort you best he could. You paused for a moment, debating if you wanted to tell him or not
“…no”, he pulled away and looked at you
“Him?” Sam shook his head slightly
“Awww cmon Y/n, thought I was your dirty little secret” Lucifer taunted, you nodded, Sam noticed that your eyes were glued to the bed. He turned around to figure out what you were looking at
“I see Lucifer” you whispered, Sam’s face dropped and you watched the color fade from his cheeks. He blinked and glanced back at the bed
You didn’t speak you just shook your head and stared at the space between Sam and the mattress
“He needs to know” Sam let go of you and started to stand up
“No! Wait Sam don’t tell him”
“Y/n you can’t keep hiding this from him this is serious”
“No, look I can tell him or you can. It’s your choice” you shut your eyes and let out a groan before you picked yourself up off the ground
“Aww go run to daddy tattletale” Lucifer snickered
“What?” Sam turned around
“Nothing” you pushed past him and jogged down the stairs. When you reached the living room Dean was siting on the couch with a hardened expression. You went to speak before you changed your mind amd turned around. You were met with two large hands on your shoulders and a stern expression from Sam
“Tell me what” Dean raised his brow and folded his arms
“Y/n’s been having a… a bit of a hard time adjusting”
“Go on” Sam gave you a gentle nudge and pushed you towards the couch. You stood there for a second, frozen in place, fingers twitching before you spoke
“I see things” you stated quietly
“I’m sorry?” Dean scoffed
“Yea I heard you the first time what do you mean I see things? Like visions?” He said
“No like… like things that aren’t there” you corrected
“Hallucinations” Dean stood up, his expression had changed from annoyed to concerned. You just nodded. Dean shot Sam a worried glance before his gaze turned back to you
“And you’re just now telling us this?” He snapped
“I didn’t wanna worry you” you mumbled
“Worry me- what the hell Y/n?!”
“No seriously what the hell. I mean what- how am I supposed to argue with that? What are you seeing? Demons?” He rubbed his face amd started to pace
“For starters” you agreed
“Starters? What else” he asked, you went quiet
“Lots of things, mostly things from hell, like the fire or the chains. But I also see him”
“She sees Lucifer” Sam answered for you
“Lucif-“ Dean couldn’t even finish his sentence. He ran his hands through his hair and did a lap around the table. He bit his lip, took in a deep breath, and tried to calm himself
“I’m sorry, I got it under control”
“Under control? Y/n we just found you screaming your head off upstairs, you wanna call that under control? You’re not ok Y/n, you’re messed up, which fine, I get it, I’m not blaming you but you need help kid”
“I need time” you stated “and space” you looked between your brothers before you shook your head
“I think I’m gonna take a walk” you decided
“What? No Y/n you’re not-“
“I need some air” you waved Dean off with a flick of your wrist and headed towards the door.
“Y/n” Sam called after you but you kept walking until you reached the door handle
“I’ll be back in a few, just give me some time” you said before you opened the door and slipped out the back. The gravel crunched beneath your shoes, the breeze was crisp and chilly. You made it halfway through the yard before you heard a pair of footsteps… no… two pairs. You turned around and saw both of your brothers jogging towards you
“I thought I said I needed space” you sighed
“I know, I just don’t want you out here by yourself” Dean said, giving you a half smile. His eyes looked tired and his jacket was all wrinkled. Sam stood beside him looking just as exhausted but desperate nonetheless
“Why don’t we take a drive, huh? Grab some grub we need a break kiddo” Dean suggested, you pondered the thought and almost went to decline before Sam spoke
“Please Y/n, we just want you to be safe. We don’t have to talk about it, just some greasy food maybe we can stop for ice cream on the way back” you nibbled on the inside of your lip before you caved
“Deal” Dean said, grabbing his keys from his pocket. The three of you headed towards the car and drove out of the yard. You drove for thirty minutes, no questions, no pestering. Just Dean’s music softly playing in the background, the engine filled up the remaining space. After a few more minutes you reached a little diner. You went inside and picked a booth. The boys sat across from you, their eyes were locked in on your frame
“Sorry” Sam apologized, picking up his menu. “I’m just worried”
“I told you I’m fine, I just.. I don’t know I’m just stressed you know? I can’t tell what’s real and what’s not, everywhere I look he’s there, in the corner, watching me” you fiddled with your sleeve and watched an older couple take a seat a few tables down.
“You really can’t tell?” Dean asked
“I mean I know it’s not real it just… it feels real” you said quietly. You looked up at Dean and saw a faint smile on his face
“What?” You scoffed, waiting for him to make a dumb dad joke
“Nothing it’s just” he paused and sat his menu down. “You know, for a Winchester I thought you be more” he cocked his head “clever”
Your brows furrowed “what?”
“Oh cmon Y/n, don’t play dumb” Sam snickered
“I don’t..” you trailed off when you realized the diner was starting to melt. The walls began to drip and the table started disappearing
“You thought they cared about you this much” Dean chuckled, his voice distorted slightly. You stumbled out of the booth and tripped over a wooden box. You tumbled to the floor, your eyes widened . The tacky checkered tiles of the diner morphed into cold concrete.
“You honestly believed that?” Sam stood up, his body flickered for a brief second. “Believed this” he said motioning towards the crumbling ceiling. Suddenly the walls collapsed, you picked yourself up off the floor and tried to run. You made it a few feet before your foot got caught on a metal pipe. You tripped and fell, your hands and knees landed on the floor hard. You winced, you were on all fours, the room shook.
You picked your hands up and cringed when you realized you’d fallen on broken glass. You whimpered and curled them against your chest until the shaking finally stopped. A loud sharp sound echoed through what you now noticed was a warehouse. You turned your body and saw Lucifer slowly walking towards you clapping his hands. A burst of laughter tore through the air, a smile crept up his lips
“Oh Y/n, I gotta say the look on your face right now” he clicked his tongue a few times. “Priceless”
“I’m afraid so kiddo” he shrugged
“No I was with them, the diner, the-“
“Oh you mean..” he bent down and scooped up a menu off the floor. “This diner” he held up the piece of paper and snapped his fingers. The menu vanished but his devilish grin remained.
“Sorry sweetheart, hate to burst your bubble” you pushed yourself into the corner, the air smelled like oil and rust.
“What?” He asked, he slowly made his way toward you. “I thought we were friends” he faked a frown as you brought your knees up to your chest. He stood over you before he crouched down and hummed
“You look tired Y/n, you should really work on that sleep schedule of yours” he teased
“I thought you’d never ask” he smirked and then he was gone. You looked around the warehouse, squinting at the shadows waiting for him to jump out at you. You forced yourself to your feet and tried to brush the glass off your hands but the shards were too deep. You flinched and decided to leave them in, you slowly made your way out of the corner
“Is this better Y/n” you jumped at the voice and immediately started to spin in place.
“What you don’t wanna play with me anymore” he hissed, his voice bounced off the walls but you couldn’t see him. Your head was on a swivel, you turned in every direction.
“You’re not real!” You yelled
“Does it matter” you felt your hair being pulled, ice cold fingertips grazed your cheek. You shrieked and swatted the air, another laugh rang through the empty warehouse
“Doesn’t it feel real Y/n?” He purred, you felt your skin crawl
“SAM!” You screamed, praying that calling their names out would make them magically appear. “DEAN!” You hollered
“They’re not coming” he whispered in your ear, so close you could feel his breath. You screeched and fell to the floor, slamming your hands against your ears. The glass sunk deeper into your palms, a few pieces scratched your face and rolled down your arms.
“Get up” he ordered, his voice didn’t sound as playful this time. “Get up!” He growled, you heard a loud crash but you didn’t look up.
“Y/n!” He screamed, another crash echoed through your eardrums
“Y/n!” Your eyes snapped open, the voice had changed. You looked up and saw your brothers standing in the middle of the warehouse. They looked real, they looked scared. Their eyes were huge, they froze when you saw them
“Y/n” Dean sad calmly, approaching you like he was trying to catch a stray dog
“No!” You shouted, you stood up and grabbed the only thing you were ninety nine percent sure of. Your gun. You whipped it out and cocked it, aiming at the center of his chest
“WOAH!” Sam immediately threw his hands up and put himself in front of Dean. You redirected your aim towards Sam
“Y/n. Put the gun down” Sam ordered sternly
“Cmon Y/n, you’re really gonna fall for this again” Lucifer finally appeared, he leaned against a metal shelf covered in dust and old boxes. You looked over at him and switched gears. You pointed the barrel at his head, all he did was chuckle
“You know you can’t kill me sweetheart” he taunted, you didn’t think you just shot. He disappeared as the bullet pierced the box that was behind head
“Y/N!” Dean barked “under no circumstances are we to recklessly discharge a weapon. Do you understand me?”
“I can’t tell” you pointed the gun back at Dean. He put his hands up like Sam and took a slow step forward
“No! You’re not real!” You cried, the gun rattled as your hand began to shake
“I’m as real as it gets kiddo” he said, he softened his voice and lowered his hands
“You sure about that?” You whipped your head around
“It’s me” your eyes watered, Dean was now suddenly standing behind you.
“Y/n?” Sam tried to catch your attention
“I don’t know which ones real” you sobbed
“Baby I’m real” the Dean next to Sam pled
“I can’t trust you” your hand was shaking so hard the gun almost slipped. You made a split decision, impulsive and stupid, you raised your gun and held it against your temple
“NO!” Sam screamed, your sobs grew louder
“HEY! Look at me” Dean yelled, this time he didn’t hesitate to approach you.
“I can’t do it De” you closed your eyes, your tears slipped down your cheek.
“Yes you can look at me, hey” you felt a warm rough hand wrap around your wrist. Your gun was easily taken from you and immediately cleared. You heard the magazine hit the ground with a thud.
“Hey” you kept your eyes closed, you couldn’t look at him. Dean quickly slipped your gun under his belt and cupped both sides of your face
“Y/n, I need you to open your eyes” he gently swiped his thumb across your cheek to rid the tears
“You’re not real” you sniffled, you heard another pair of footsteps approach you
“Y/n, I need you to trust us” that was Sam
“Open your eyes” Dean said, his voice was more firm this time. You squeezed your eyes as tight as they would go before you forced yourself to open them. A blurry image of your brothers came into view
“There she is” Dean smiled and stroked your hair back. You almost believed it for a second before you saw him looming over Sam’s shoulder. You snapped your eyes shut again and whimpered
“I told you, you can’t get rid of me that easy squirt”
“Hey, hey, hey, whatever you’re seeing it’s not real. You hear me? It’s not real” Dean gave you a little shake. You opened your eyes and glanced at Lucifer, he raised his brow and set his chin on Sam’s shoulder. You watched him peek up at your brother before he looked back at you
“He says the same thing about you” you whispered, Dean shot Sam a worried glance before he shallowed
“Hey Y/n, give me your hand” Sam held his own hand out for you to grab
“Your hand, gimme your hand” he reached for you before you could even register what he said.
“Sorry in advance” he mumbled
“What- OW Sammy stop” you yelped, Sam was pressing his thumb into your palm. The glass shot another sharp pain into your skin.
“Sam stop” you tried to jerk away but he held you tighter
“Do you feel that?! I’m real. Dean’s real. This is real Y/n it has to feel different please” he begged, Lucifer flickered. The pain became irrelevant when you saw his smile fade
“No biggie, we’ve worked with pain before sweetheart” he shrugged, but he didn’t look as confident as he did before
“Hey, focus” Dean snapped his fingers in front of your face. “We’re real, you gotta make it mean more than whatever you’re seeing kiddo” he grabbed your shoulders and gave you a firm shake
“Look at me” you cut your eyes at him
“You gotta trust us, you gotta make it stone number one. Are you hearing me?”
“Y/n” Sam grabbed your chin and tilted your face to meet his. All you could do was nod
“Damn right” Lucifer scoffed, he walked around Sam and started to circle the three of you.
“Don’t look at him, look at me” Dean ordered but you couldn’t help it. You watched him stalk you, his eyes were cold and torturous
“Hey!” Dean grabbed your hand and dug his thumb into your palm
“OW DEAN!” You howled and frantically tried to pry his fingers off
“Y/n” Lucifer warned, but he was flickering more now
“This is different Y/n, make it different. This is earth, this is life, it sucks and it hurts but it feels different” Dean clenched his jaw and pushed down on your palm again. You cried but you focused on the pain, when you looked back up he was gone. You stared at the empty space then you looked down at your palms. They were covered in bright red blood and small glass shards. You felt the pain, the sting, the burn, but it felt real this time
“Hey” Sam snapped you out of your trance and found your gaze. “You with us?” He asked, you realized how terrified he looked, you remembered the gun. Everything came crashing down on you all at once the guilt, the shame, the fear. It overwhelmed you and before you could warn your brothers you felt your knees buckle. You started to collapse before Dean quickly hooked his arm under yours
“Woah, woah, woah” he muttered, gently lowering you to the ground. You immediately started crying, loud heart wrenching sobs.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry” you cried
“Hey, hey, hey, hey, shh none of that” Sam was at your side in seconds, he pulled you into his chest and held you like a delicate flower
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to- the gun.. I-“
“Stop it” Sam cut you off before you could continue. “Don’t” he cupped your head and tucked you under his chin. You cried into his flannel, staining the fabric, clutching the buttons.
“It’s ok, shh, I got you, we got you” Sam soothed, he started to gently stroke your hair
“No” you whimpered and pushed him away, he let you go but kept you within reach
“Uh uh, we’re not gonna do that” Dean said, he grabbed your chin again and held your face firmly. “You were scared, you were scared and you didn’t know what to believe, I get it. I’m not mad and neither is Sam” he gently wiped your tears away with his other hand before he pulled you closer
“But I need you to listen to me. Under no condition do you raise that gun and point it at yourself. Never. Do you understand me?” He asked, you nodded
“If I ever see you do something like that again so help me Y/n, you will never touch a gun again” he warned, you sniffled and nodded again
“Good” he instantly pulled you into his chest and cradled you like it was the end of the world. “Shh, you’re safe” he cooed, rubbing his hand up and down your arm “I’m here, Sammy’s here” he whispered, rocking slightly. Sam reached out and grabbed your wrist to remind you that you were ok
“You got out sweetheart, you’re home” Sam murmured, his voice was so soft and familiar. Everything finally felt right and natural. The steady thump of Dean’s heartbeat, the smell of Sam laundry detergent, the warm calloused hand around your arm. You stayed in their arms for who knows long before Dean finally broke the silence
“We should get back, Bobby’s been worried” he said quietly, kissing the top of your head before he loosened his grip
“Bobby’s worried?” You asked, you sounded so young and childlike to them. Like you were surprised someone actually cared about you
“Yea he’s been worried sick ever since you got back, the man barely sleeps. He’s probably paced a hole in the floor by now, we should get going” Sam said
Dean gingerly helped you up, careful not to touch your hands too much. “Sorry about your hands” he winced when he saw how bloodied and banged up you were. “I had to”
“It’s ok” you smiled tiredly and nudged his shoulder
“Cmon, let’s go before it gets too late” Sam coaxed you towards the exit of the warehouse, both of the boys kept you at arms length. You made your way outside when you saw the impala sloppily parked in the grass. You gasped.
“Oh God, oh, oh Dean I’m sorry, I didn’t- I took that didn’t I- I-“
“Hey, hey, she’s fine, don’t worry I checked” he winked, you knew he was lying, he didn’t care about the car.
“You sure I didn’t mess it up?” you slowly approached the car, scared to inspect it
“It’s fine Y/n, I promise, besides I care more about my sister than a friggin car” he grabbed you by the shoulder and pulled you into a brief hug. “Don’t worry about it” he ruffled your hair before he let you go
“Cmon, the house is a ways away” he got in and started the car. You went to sit in the back before Sam redirected you
“Sam we don’t all fit in the front” you chuckled
“Says who” he said, you shook your head but you listened and slid in beside Dean. Sam got in after you, sandwiching you in. Thankfully you were smaller than the boys so you fit between them like a glove. The drive was quiet, Sam kept his hand on your knee, rubbing small circles on your jeans to comfort you. Dean had his hand gingerly resting next to yours, he was careful not to mess with the wounds but close enough to provide affection.
When you finally arrived at the house you felt exhausted. Your body ached, your eyes were dry, and your hands were burning. You went to get out of the car when Sam easily scooped you up in his arms
“Sammy” you went to protest but he shushed you and made his way to the porch. Bobby opened the door with a worried expression before his face softened
“Hi Bobby” you smiled, you had your arms wrapped around your brothers neck as he carried you into the house. He set you down on the couch gently as Dean strolled through the front door
“Grab the med kit Sammy” he directed, fetching a bowl from Bobby’s cabinet.
“S’going on?” Bobby asked, locking the door behind them
“Cut her hands up pretty good, gotta patch her up shouldn’t be too bad” Dean filled the bowl with warm water and grabbed a clean cloth on his way to the couch. He sat down next to you and placed the bowl on the table.
You uncurled your wrists and showed him your bloodied palms
“Gosh Y/n” he mumbled “what happened” he gingerly pulled up your sleeves
“I fell in the warehouse, landed on glass” you winced when he opened your hands a little more
“Sorry” he mumbled, examining the severity. “Alright, I gotta get that glass out, then we’ll see if you need stitches” he explained, you nodded. You were trying to focus on the pain when you caught a glimpse of familiar face. Your body shivered when you saw Lucifer siting on Bobby’s table. Swinging his legs back and forth, just watching
“Hey. Eyes on me” Dean grabbed your chin and forced you to look at him
“He’s not real” Dean grabbed a pair of tweezers and held it close to your hand. “Ok, easy does it” Dean gingerly started to pick out the glass fragments. You squirmed a little, the pain was sharp and intense
“Easy, easy, I know it stings” Dean soothed, Lucifer started flickering like a dying light bulb.
“Don’t worry honey, I’ll be back, again, and again, and again” he taunted, you grit your teeth and focused on the gash on your hand. You felt the couch dip beside, Sam had plopped down and placed his hand on your knee. You were boxed in between the boys again, safe. Dean tugged on a shard of glass that instinctively made you flinch. You pulled away from him but he held onto your wrist with his other hand
“I know, I know, I gotta get it out kiddo” he didn’t yell or look annoyed, he just looked like a concerned brother.
“He’s almost done” Sam said softly, he started rubbing your back with a warm hand. Eventually the pain took over and Lucifer vanished again. You didn’t care how much it stung when Dean dipped your hand in the bowl of water. Or how much it burned when he cleaned the wound out with antiseptic. You didn’t even flinch when he wrapped them up.
He was gone and you could finally breathe again.
“There” Dean let go of your wrists and gave you a tired smile. “He still there?”
Dean’s smile grew a little wider. He kissed your forehead and pat your shoulder. “Good. You keep your eyes on us ok? Things start getting bad you stay put, we’ll always find you”
“What if I don’t know it’s you” you whispered
“You will. Just stay put”
Sam squeezed your knee and started to clean up the living room. You were far from ok, you were falling apart. Your dark circles had dark circles, your hands were torn to shreds, and you were exhausted. Everything around you felt like a trap or a trick but your brothers were there to pull you back down. You weren’t going to pop back into shape this go round, it would take time. But your brothers had all the time in the world for you.
(I have a few requests, I’m working on them now. They’ll take a while to write but I’ll hopefully be able to post preferences or headcanons simultaneously)
If you read this entire fic ty :)
