Survival Diary

My name is Kath Miranda. This diary is meant to log my survival (I hope) during this inexplicable outbreak of the un-dead.

[survival-diary]

February 12th, Day Sixty-Nine: Colbourne's musings #2

Yesterday we arrived to a small town, which seems t obe completely abandoned already and we haven't come across too many of the dead. Katherine has not been quite into things lately and hasn't been writing much in her diary. I thought to recrod some more thoughts again, it's been a long while since last time.

I believe we are now in Kentucky... or it could be Virginia as well. We crossed the state border somewhat off road. I've been thinknig of my family, and I believe it's time to accept the possiblity I won't see them. While this saddens me greatly, I believe I should still stay strong - just in case. And perhaps for part to take care of Katherine and the others.

We've set a base of sorts in one of the houses in this town and there's some food and equipment to scavenge for the road once we leave. However, other than this I haven't much to really write. I took a peek at Katherine's writings (with her permission of course), and noticed she didn't really take time to describe anyone. I suppose I could do that now, with the people who are here. While I understand why she wouldn't bother describing anyone, I try to be hopeful.

Katherine is a fairly normal-sized woman, and has lost some weight since this started. She has large, hazel eyes and when we met her dark blonde hair was quite short, but has grown out considerably in the past two months. Her approximate height would be around 5 feet and 6 inches (which I believe to be around 167 centimeters in metrics, if someone Canadian finds this).

Katherine's brother, young Timothy has his sister's blonde hair, which has also grown out since we met him. He also has a scruffy teenage stubble. He has darker brown eyes and has a somewhat athletic build. His approximate height would be around... 5 feet 10 inches (which would be about 178 centimeters, I think, for you Canadians if you find this).

Then there's Andy and I can't still think much of him. However, he did save Katherine's life while risking his own, so I suppose he's just... fine. The boy is somewhat older than Timothy but younger than Katherine. He has dark, curly hair that's grown out to his shoulders - though he doesn't really seem to grow any facial haair that I see. He has dark green eyes, and a generally pudgy build (though I'm sure he'll lose those bounds as this thing goes on). Andy would be approximately 5 feet and 7 inches (about 170 centimeters).

Lastly, me? I suppose I should give a fair and objective picture of me, too. I have bright blue eyes, and my hair is now all greyed out, though in my youth it was blond (and despite my age, I do have a full head of hair). While it keeps growing out, I use a combat knife to cut it shorter when needed (something I should offer for the boys and Katherine as well). Through the years I've trained to maintain a good and strong body, just in case something like this happens. And lately all this walking has helped. I am about 6 feet tall (182 centimeters).

Now, I won't write much more. But perhaps soon I should tell these notes of the different personalities we have here. I'm hoping we could perhaps be able to get one of these cars in the town running and siphon enough gas for a while. But we'll have to see about that later.

[survival-diary]

February 5th, Day Sixty-Two

It's been some time since we left Wheeling and we've been walking for six days now. Sticking to woods and avoiding roads for now, mr. LeMonte says he doesn't really want to see other people right now and frankly neither do I to be honest.

I was really expecting to be able to do something for the people in Wheeling but nothing came of it. People jst died, Frank's gone and so is Susan probably. We do still have a surprsiing amount of medical supplies but food is really running out and while Mr. LeMonte had a lot of guns, we lost most of them and I've no idea how much ammunition there's either.

I finally got to talk to everyone too. Timothy says that what happened would've happened sooner or later. That while it was shitty, the things that were going on with the people in Wheeling were just too much. He's shaken up about everything that happened but he's happy we're all still alive. Well, that I and mr. LeMonte are still alive. He didn't have much to say about Andy being with us. Except that the fact that he saved my life does get him "extra points".

I got a better chance to talk with mr. LeMonte earlier today when we left the camp to go fishing. At the time it was quiet and calm, so we figured Timothy and Andy can handle themselves in the camp. He didn't say much, though, but I could tell he was upset. Probably about all that happened. And perhaps about losing most of our stuff for nothing. But there was this short moment when he set his hand on my shoulder and was about the say something but ended up staying silent for a while before finally being able to speak. "This might seem bad, Katherine, but I'm sure we'll make it", he said.... and, well... "And I'm glad you made it."

It's about... 4am, my turn to guard the camp. An hour or so ago Andy got up from his tent, said he couldn't sleep. Said he hasn't been able to really sleep in a while now. He says that while he did it to save me - for a good reason on his standards - he's just been feeling sick because of what he did. Of shooting another human being. A living human being. I don't really know how I'd feel in that situation... probably very similarly.

In the end, I told Andy that it's probably a good thing he feels sick. There's no point in surviving if anyone on us lets go of our humanity. Then I asked Andy how life was before this started for him. Something to get his mind out of what happened. Andy told me he was going to art school, commenting on how he's brought very little special talent to any group. He also told me about his family, his parents being a lawyer and a nurse, and a sister in middle school. Though he doesn't know what happened to them: his family was in Europe when this started. Things got more grim when the subject turned to how this started. How Andy lost his boyfriend before he ended up with the Safe Zone group in Wheeling.

After that he didn't really feel like talking and told me he'd try to sleep again and here I am, sitting on guard duty. I'm waking up Timothy soon to take over so I can sleep just a little before we need to pack up and keep on moving. Mr. LeMonte insisted on taking the last guard shift but he needs his sleep more than anyone else here. Despite any injuries and scratches, he's old. And that can be so much more tacing than a lot of actual injuries.

I don't know where we'll end up, or how, but I'm keeping my hopes up. I'm sure we find something. And maybe.. I don't know. Go to coast perhaps? Figure something from there.

[survival-diary]

February 3rd, Day Sixty

It's been a while since last time. I suppose I could say I've been tied up for a while... huh, puns? I guess things aren't as screwed up as they'd appear. But where should I start with this. Well, there's the pun. Not soon after I made it back to Close's safe zone, I ended up being held captive here. Something about changing sides, betraying and spying. How can it be that people turn this savage in less than two months?

So, most days I spent in my... cell Rodriguez would often come in to question me about the museum group. Their numbers and plans... but it's not like they have either one. One day Close came in and told me about the museum group. Apparently they were all originally part of a whole bigger group but.. something's just off. I know this hell with the zombies and everything happened and escalated really fast, but can all this happen in such a short time? But I suppose when people panic, stuff happens fast.

Anyway, apparently the museum people got somewhat... forceful when asking for meds and other resources, but I can't really see old and sick people getting that dangerous. Not that any of that matters at this point.

Apparently while I was held by Close's group, Ian started running a fever and got a serious infection. Then one night he... turned. So yeah, cutting it off isn't helping, apparently. Amputation is just wishful thinking. Though... I dunno. who knows. Maybe with better equipment. If it didn't get infected? Shit, anyway. So, one night Ian turned and before anyone noticed it, he ended up eating part of the museum group and they all turned. So those who were still alive left the museum. And thank God, Mr. LeMonte and Timothy are still alive.

So, having nowhere else to go, the group headed to Close's community while mr. LeMonte and Timothy took our car. At that point, I'd been captive for about... 8 days but I did tell the two it might take a while when I try to talk out some kind of a resolution. But I suppose that half the people dying in the museum somewhat inspired them to come and get me on their own terms.

But as the museum group made it close enough, Rodriguez finally pulled me out of the cell and dragged me outside the gates of the safe zone and then stuck a shotgun barrel to the back of my head. The sudden shift in my surroundings really threw me off, so I'm still not quite sure what exactly happened.

But supposedly Rodriguez was using my as a leverage to make sure that the museum group would not "try anything". And then it all just kind of went to... just shit. For some reason Andy had snuck my bag out of where ever it was being kept and he.. saved me. Andy shot Rodriguez in the head, took a hold of me and just told me to run. After that, the gunshots just started blazing. From both the museum group and the safe zone group. And the noise just started drawing out the dead.

Not soon after that mr. LeMonte and Timothy found us and... we just decided to leave. There's really nothing in Wheeling anymore. In cities. It's just nothing but hell. Honestly, I don't feel like writing much more right now. Even if there's a lot to say, I guess.

The stuff we had in the station wagon was not much. Most of it was gone. And we just kept on driving and refilling the fuel. And now and then stopping to sleep. But after two days, we ran out of fuel. And there was nothing to siphon or use to get another refill. We did make it south enough that the amount of snow isn't that bad anymore but it's still so damn cold.

We've been walking for four days without much to eat and always on the lookout for the dead or the living or anything. Right now, I don't know where we'll end up. I'm just happy Mr. LeMonte was really smart (or paranoid). We have a big tent to sleep in.

So... not much else to say for now. We're heading south. Perhaps we can find a small town. Something other than cities.

[survival-diary]

January 20th, Day Forty-Six

Today, I've been preparing and putting things together to execute my... plans. Biggest thing to wonder might be: What exactly have I been planning here?

The situation here is, in a word, volatile. I wish that things would go smoothly for everyone and I could make it somehow. Anyway, I'm planning to go back to the the safe zone community and try to get to talk with Close to solve and defuse this situation.

Why me, then? I'm not exactly a diplomat... then again, I feel like I can make much more of a reasonable argument than Mr. LeMonte or Timothy to start with. And when I spoke with Nettle and some other people here, they outright refused to even consider going to talk with the other group. Even saying I'd be crazy for going.

Mr. LeMonte was... supportive, I'd say. He says it's unlikely there's a peaceful solution to all of this at this point but I should nonetheless try. Timothy was generally unsure. He asked if I could take him with me, saying he's worried for my safety. Not because of the other group per se, but going out into the city alone is dangerous. And it is. But by staying here, Timothy is safer than out on the streets with me.

I have no idea how this might turn out, but I have to, I HAVE to try. If this turns out well, perhaps we could stay in Wheeling for longer. Perhaps permanently until all this sorts out? I would say "wish me luck", but considering you might be reading this long after I'm gone... no point there?

Now, I need to catch some sleep before I leave in the morning. Pa, I'm doing the right thing here, right?

[survival-diary]

January 19th, Day Forty-Five

It's been a while again since I last wrote, then again, so far not much has been happening, to be frank.

Ian woke up and was on painkillers for a while, I can't even imagine how much it hurts. He's also been a bit depressed since losing the arm, feeling now less useful having one limb less. On the other hurt, he did not turn. Even though he was bitten. And it's been over a week, so it's not like there's a lengthened incubation for the... disease, right?

Other than hand, things have been as normal as they can be. We spend the days walking on egg shells looking out for the dead that might try and get in. At nights, small groups go out to get some food and... this is not working. Not on long term.

I do have a plan of some sort but I should discuss it with mr. LeMonte and Timothy. I'm sure at least one of them will have some kind of input. Timothy actually asked me... why do I care so much? At first I was mad at him for a question like that, but... it's not a bad question. Why do I care? Shouldn't I focus on keeping Timothy safe and focus on our group... no matter how small we are right now.

However, I do believe that humans are basically good, despite the few bad apples. And I feel it's just our... duty to help others. And I'm sure we can find some sort of a solution here. Something that helps out everyone.

So, now I'll need to collect myself and muster up courage to start this plan tomorrow... start from just talking... not much of a start? Well, I think it's better to take baby steps. These are difficult issues. I'm sure Close will listen to common sense, even if Rodriguez is... positively frightening. But Close is the leader there.

[survival-diary]

January 11th, Day Thirty-Seven

We are all still alive, I think. The run wasn't exactly perfect, to say the least.

There was me, Timothy, Robbie and Ian and our objective was to get just some food, so we headed to this warehouse supposedly holding large number of packaged canned foods, presumably there to wait for transportation.

As we reached the warehouse, we ended up finding out that pretty much all of the food was gone. For the amount of people at the museum, this was maybe three days worth, four at tops even with small rationing.

Now, the problem started when the dead came... I mean, I should know by now that they might come at any moment, at any time. But somehow... I was supposed to be standing watch, and -- I don't even know. My attention slipped for a few seconds to something and there they were.

We had two knives, a baseball bat, a wrench and one pistol with two clips of ammunition. I kind of froze and when Robbie started shooting them, it just drew more attention from the outside. And... Ian was bit. One of them bit him in the hand and I could've stopped it if I wasn't frozen like that! Why is it? I've been on runs a lot before, I even killed one of them once, but... 

When Ian was struggling, Timothy cut in and hit the.. zombie in the head multiple times and Ian got loose. I finally got control of my body and I ran with them. Even now, I'm not sure how much of food we got in that bag, I'm just... blaming myself. I mean, if I just didn't freeze. I don't think the others noticed with all the chaos but that doesn't excuse anything.

Doctor Banerjee suggested amputation as the bite was "fresh enough". No one here knows if it works but Ian told them to cut off as much as possible. Now.. well, Ian is determined, at the least. I have no idea what might follow.

As Ian's arm was being cut, he bit into some sort of a gag, but I could still hear his grunts and moans from far away. At the time I was with the kids trying to get some activity for them to get their mind off of things. They seemed to be.. okay for all things considered.

The youngest kid here is a 6-year-old boy, Joshua. He's bright, smart. Much smarter than most kids his age. Then there's twin girls Amy and Anna, who are both 8 years and most of the time they seem... oblivious. They spend most of the time by just the two of them, talking to each other, spending time in some kind of a.. pretend place. Then there's 9-year-old Mandy, who's very smart as well. She apparently heard mr. LeMonte's raving earlier and she told me she WANTS to learn. Which is... kind of horrifying that even a child this age realizes her situation. Finally there's a 10-year-old boy Leonard, who is somewhere in the middle. He seems like a very average kid and he's very anxious a lot of the time.

Ian's been sleeping since the amputation, so I can't say much about that. Robbie was doing inventory on our food and calculating with Nettle on how long this lasts and when the next food run has to be made. Or if... the whole group should try to leave the city. But considering it's been just a bit over a month, I do think there's still lot to scavenge. But just because there's lot to scavenge, does it make staying a good idea?

I didn't really talk to Timothy about what happened, but he did chat with mr. LeMonte and seemed... excited. I hope he's just excited about taking a stand and doing something to finally help people.

I really haven't done much today since we got back.  I couldn't even sleep and I'm extremely tired. I didn't even try to talk with mr. LeMonte, I don't think I have any energy or patience for his speculations today. I just hope Ian will be fine and tomorrow will be a better day.

[survival-diary]

January 10th, Day Thirty-Six

I have been unable to write regularly for a while, as I was running out of paper to do this. But I recently got myself a heftier blank book to run into.

Anyway, we're still in Wheeling and things are... odd. I sitll don't know how to really feel about anything. The situation at the museum is... okay. I mean, the dead get through some cranny every now and then, but it's not really overwhelming. And Nettle and other people here are polite, friendly and all-over accepting. In fact, they never even asked us to share anything but we decided to share with them what little we have.

Mr. LeMonte talked to me, and relayed his worries that sooner or later this might turn into a serious conflict. He thinks that by the look of things, Close's safe zone community might want to... take these people out. To make sure no one else is getting their resources.

That however makes me wonder... I mean, I know there were terrible people in this world before this but is someone really so horrible they would kill another living human being in this situation? When everything else in this world is trying to kill us. Isn't it just... common sense not to kill each other and work together?

Timothy, as far as I can see, seems to be fine. He did express he's worried about Susan and why would she decide not to come with us. He says the he considers Susan our friend, and... I agree. We haven't known for very long but Susan is a friend. Also, Timothy seems to think that Frank has most definitely died. And there I have to agree as well, even though somewhere somehow I'm keeping up hope.

I've been talking with Nettle and some other members of this museum group as well. Nettle seems by all accounts to be a sensible man. He told me he lost his wife and daughter when this started, and now he just wants to help others.

Robbie and Ian, the two guys who found us at first, seem to have a close relationship (not that I'd insinuate anything) and both of them seem like very nice and fun guys. Though Ian is a bit quick-tempered.

There are actually two doctors. First there's Hiya Banerjee, she's a 30-something Indian lady, she has a calm attitude and often gets very focused with her work. She told me she was first with Close's group, but was kicked out after helping someone "not fitting" for the safe zone. The other doctor is Thomas Fisher, an older man who apparently was already retired when this started.

I've also talked to the kids here, and there's some five of them ranging from ages 6 to 10. They're all just little sweethearts but I can already see a lot of various terrible symptoms on them. Mr. LeMonte raved to Nettle about how we should teach these children how to protect themselves. How to use weapons, how to act in dangerous situations . But no... I mean, these are children, right? WE should be the ones protecting them. I understand teaching a kid Timothy's age, teenagers in general. But these are just little kids.

Now, tonight on the 10th, group of us left out for a run to get resources for the museum group and Timothy volunteered. I told him no but he DEMANDED to get to go. After long time of arguing, I finally agreed but I'm leaving with him. We're heading out in a few minutes and I just pray everything goes okay.

[survival-diary]

January 4th, Day Thirty

It has been nearly a week since my last entry, and things sure have gotten interesting to say the least. So, mr. LeMonte did indeed use the equipment I got him to spy on Close and the... higher ups around the safe zone. And he did not get caught... I don't think so. What he found out is what he considered to be seriously disconcerting.

Apparently, there is another group like them in the city, and after listening to the tapes mr. LeMonte recorded, apparently Close speaks of them with certain degree of... dislike and guilt. At least I think. However, that was as much as the tapes really got out.

I mustered my courage and decided to confront Close about this. Of course, I didn't bring the recordings and spying on them up (that would've ended up much more nastily). 

However, even without bringing those things up... it didn't end exactly well. When I asked about the people I saw, and questioned if there's other people in the city - and why they weren't in the safe zone with others. There IS room and resources.

So, Close asked me to depart "for a while", as he put it, but there was something about the tone of his voice. I think that this will be a long while. And maybe Wheeling is not a safe city after all.

While the demand to leave was directed at me alone, mr. LeMonte and Timothy decided to come with me. So we packed what little we had left in the station wagon and... then. Susan said she won't be coming with us. That I should've never started asking like that and just trust these people. And what can I say? I want to trust people, but when I see people seemingly on purpose leaving others out in dangers... it just looks wrong.

And so, we headed out to the city and it's just... rap. There's a lot of snow on all roads so moving with a car isn't easy. However, the cold air and the snow do seem to slow the dead down. Still.. it's kind of scary thinking how many of them might be under this snow. Not to mention how many people might've frozen to death here.

On the night of January 2nd - the day we left - we ended up setting ourselves in a pharmacy out here, and things went generally speaking smoothly - despite the slow moving. But the real thing here was that inthe middle of the night someone else came in. At first I was thinking it was some of the first scavenging team from the safe zone - the one where Frank went missing. But it turned out it was people from this other larger group here.

The people who came into the pharmacy were two men, who named themselves Robbie and Ian. At first they seemed to be a bit scared of us - later it turned out they thought we were part of the safe zone community. They chose to stay the night with us there and then they helped us and our car to their... base.

These people are set up in a museum near the edge of the center of the city. It's easy to see it's not even half as safe or closed up as the safe zone we were at before. And more amazingly, this place has children, has elderly, and there seems to even be some sick people here - another thing we never saw at the safe zone (Which I thought to be just because of the doctor).

The man leading these people is named Charles Nettle, a man in his mid-50s. What I and mr. LeMonte learned (Timothy was elsewhere at the time looking around the place) is that apparently Close is refusing to take anyone who might be a "hindrance", this basically means children, elderly and the sick.

And these two groups seem to be fighting about things to catch and scavenge. And often times that Rodriguez retaliates very badly when they happen in the same place at the same place: this is also why they send out scavenging teams out at night!

Now, we got a place to stay here after we told them about what we've been through. Yesterday and today have been.. okay. A few incidents where the dead were close to getting in. I haven't really talked to the local... leader or mr. LeMonte, I'm just being really confused and I don't know what to do.

I feel like I... we should somehow try to solve this situation here in Wheeling, but... on the other hand I fel like we should just pack up and leave, head south and not look behind. But that would mean we'd be leaving these people to die.

Ma, Pa, why are there no easy answers?

[survival-diary]

December 29th, Day Twenty-Four

The first few days after the last entry didn't really consist of anything unusual, and life here's been as normal as it can be. But yesterday it was decided that today a group would head out and I chose to offer myself to go with the group. And again, I implored mr. LeMonte to take care of Timothy.

This time the group is formed of six people, and it's lead by Close's second-in-command, Herman Rodriguez. Susan also partook as something of an expert in navigating through the sewers. Our group was handed three guns and we were instructed to attempt to get into pairs (at the very least) if for some reason we ended up separating.

Around 11am, we opened the sewer grate within the safe zone and entered the sewer network, starting to make our way to our two goals: the hospital and a large hardware store in the city.

First we hit the hospital, which I suppose was the right choice in it's way. At least medication and doctor's equipment is relatively light to carry when compared to whatever we'd pick up from the hardware store. However, it turned out to be just like I suspected and there wasn't exactly a shortage of the un-dead.

In the hospital we separate into two groups of three to loot, and... I'm surprised it took this long, but I had to kill one of the dead for the first time myself. Our group of three had me, Susan and this kid... the boy isn't even Timothy's age. One of the dead crawled in when we didn't notice and grabbed him. Susan started to hesitate with her gun for some reason - I'm not sure if she was worried about hitting the boy or about alarming more of the dead with a gunshot. But at that point, I took the hammer I was handed as a weapon and used it to smash it's head in. And, I feel good I saved someone, but honestly it's hard to feel good about killing anything at all... and that... thing looked liked it was a patient once. Sick with who knows what.. but it doesn't matter now, does it?

The boy named himself as Zack Thorne after I finally chose to ask for his name. Other than that, he didn't say much, though. I'd guess he's about 16 and is just putting up some sort of a tough guy act to look proper in the safe zone.

Still, we were lucky enough to rendezvous with the other three and get out of the hospital with minimal problems. As we were moving through the sewers, I started to wonder why there wasn't more people in the safe zone? I mean, all of the metropolitan area has over 100 thousand people. Yes, some of them have turned and died.... but still. Their initial demands on staying haven't been exactly strict or devilishly bad.

But today, the oddest thing in a while happened when we were in the hardware store. I and Zack were told to look for batteries and other such doohickeys that the safe zone could use - then we ran into some other people. People NOT from the safe zone. Initially they actually spoke to us, but I couldn't really get anything out of them. As soon as Rodriguez came from around the corner, the other group seemed to freeze in fear and then they just ran off.

I asked Rodriguez what the heck it was about but he just told me it was nothing and I shouldn't think too much about it. And the tone he told me that with was... well, let's just say I'm not going to bug him any more about this.

On good news, I did get the stuff mr. LeMonte asked for. I carefully gave them to him so others wouldn't notice and told him to be careful. Whatever he's planning isn't exactly safe for him - or us. I'll have to talk to him tomorrow more seriously about all what he's planning and what's going on.

[survival-diary]

December 26th, Day Twenty-One

Some would say they're having a post-Christmas blues. though I think it's more timely to say that we're all having an un-dead apocalypse blues? I shouldn't joke like this... but these calm days have been just so relaxing.

Susan and I chatted today by morning coffee (usually coffee is reserved here for special occasions but due to the Christmas season, Close has allowed people to have it more freely) and she was telling me how she's been helping Close plan a special run to the city by putting the sewer layout and city map together. Frankly, it sounds like a good plan. The sewers seemed all over pretty empty, so it should be safer - not to mention faster- there. I wonder if I should join this run too, just so Timothy or mr. LeMonte won't have to... though that means I probably should also take some shooting lessons? But it's not like I have to decide yet.

Timothy has been feeling good and says he enjoys the things he's been learning, and I'm happy to see he's trying to step up - even though part of me wouldn't want him to. To me, he'll always be that snot-nosed 6-year-old who wanted to read comic books with me. Anyway, he says he noticed Andy talking to me a few times and asked if there was "something more to it", silly boy? I did tell him we're just friends. We all here should be friends to work together and survive.

Mr. LeMonte has settled for that waiting and watching thing, though he still has a lot of arguments with Close - this time about us having to give up more of our equipment. It's surprisingly difficult to explain to a stubborn old man that it just simply makes sense. Basic exchange. Goods for safety. He asked me if I'd be going on a run soon, and said that I should try to pick up some... surveillance equipment. Apparently, he'd want to bug Close's quarters to spy on him. I said I'd think about it but this is just insane.

Dr. Wilkinson has been nothing but supportive and friendly with my studying under him even if it's just been a few days. Though during today's lessons Close came to the medical room today and pulled Dr. Wilkinson away for a while to talk about something, I don't quite know what. After the talk Dr. Wilkinson was awfully quiet.

Andy came to ask me about inhalators. Not really if he could get another one - he said he hasn't needed his for a while now. He just was curious about the way they work for some reason. I guess that's just about getting his mind off of things? He also suggested he could help me learn to shoot - since most people taking the lessons have already advanced some and I don't know squat about shooting. This makes me wonder if he's coming onto me, even though I could swear he's.. .well, gay. Not that I have anything against that but it's odd he's acting like this at times. His mannerism at other times is just... so different. He almost feels like... well.. a little sister. God, now I sound like a bigoted asshole. Maybe he's just being friendly and his sexual interests have nothing to do with anything.

I actually did go ahead and ask Close straight about no kids here. He just told me it's more of bad luck rather than anything. But he also said that the current situation is "good", and that "at least these people can all do something".

Now.. I'll just have to keep up with what I'm doing and wait to hear about the run Susan and Close have been planning. And maybe... think about that surveillance equipment... stupid, but eh... I want to trust mr. LeMonte - but at the same time I want to trust these people. Why can't I do both?

[survival-diary]

December 25th, Day Twenty

These past few days in the safe zone have truly been calm and it's been better than it's been in a long time.

I don't honestly have much to write on this night. Although Frank has not come back, things have just been on such a positive route that I almost feel like there's reason to wait for a... well, a Christmas Miracle.

Yesterday I agreed to join a group to go on a run outside, which went all over smoothly. And honestly the only reason I agreed to go was just so I could pick out some.... presents for the others - which actually succeeded.

So without much further ado, all I can say is Merry Christmas and God bless us everyone.

[survival-diary]

December 22nd, Day Seventeen

It's been a calm day today. Although Frank hasn't still shown up - not that anyone else from the group has. Close already wrote them off as dead, saying it's impossible they'd be alive out there after this long. I'd rather not believe that but who knows?

Timothy's gotten more lively and actually does things around here, going around helping and learning. I'm not sure if it's good or bad though, it's not that long since ma died... then again, I've held it together regardless. But I think just because I feel like I have to. If I don't stay calm, that would probably not be a good sign for Timothy.

I also got to learning a bit of something, and I asked the local doctor - Mark Wilkinson - to teach me in healthcare so I could put myself to better use than running outside the safe zone. And it's been going pretty okay since I used to study medicine before I changed my majors and ended up as a kindergarten teacher.

Mr. LeMonte's still insisting that this place is no good, but he did say he's fine with staying here for some time. And he seemed to take it in when I tod him that we can't really go drawing any conclusions about this place before we have clear evidence - as so far all of their demands have been perfectly sensible considering the situation.

Susan's been busy around Close and other people in the safe zone, she seems to have been helping them plan a new run outside to get things. They seem to be packing all kind of things here. Medicine, weapons, machine parts and so on.

Andy's been all right, not a sign of nervousness since we got back. He's been generally friendly and talkative, but we haven't really chatted today. Though he seemed to take some shooting lessons with some of the other people here. I wonder if I should join in when I have the time?

And about LeMonte's suspicions? I haven't really seen anything odd since that whole "there's no kids here" thing. Which I think is more of a coincidence than anything. Though if I had to nitpick, one of the buildings in the zone seems to be out of limits to most people, save for Close and a select few others. But there's gotta be a reason for that too, not to mention we just arrived, they have just as many reasons not to trust us as LeMonte has not to trust them. But I think we should trust people, right? What's the point of anything if we stop trusting anyone? If anything, give people the benefit of the doubt.

[survival-diary]

December 21st, Day Sixteen

It's now been over two weeks since this began, and things have been getting worse each day. I was sure that the army would roll in sooner and later and this would be resolved. We also made it back to the safe zone, however Frank and the others of the group that left have not returned.

Susan did give up on the idea on using the car we found at the wastewater plant as there was not fuel for it. I was actually somewhat relieved that we'd have to go with my plan of sneaking back. However, she did get another idea, which was actually a rather good one. She managed on getting the plant's back up generator working, and as the plant started running, it seemed to make enough noise to draw the attention of the dead.

The three of us made it out of the plant and past a few blocks before the dead got there. As they were following the noise, we ended up hiding in a small drug store on the way. Sadly the drug store was mostly looted, and the back room where they kept the more expensive merchandise was locked tight so we couldn't grab anything. A real shame ,but I still decided to memorize the place. Just in case.

But what I did find to be useful was a couple of basic inhalators. I gave one for Andy and suggested he'd use it. It seemed to calm him down, even though he doesn't seem to have medical need for one. Now, while they help him calm down, it makes me wonder how the leaders of the safe zone would like it if a person uses inhalators without immediate medical need?

As we returned on the 19th, we heard that Frank and the others haven't returned, and still haven't by tonight. But I was pleased to see that Timothy and mr. LeMonte were all right. Andy left us pretty soon after we arrived and headed to some friends of his in here. Susan headed off to find Close - the man running this place. Susan wanted to show the sewer map and suggest using the sewer routes on runs to the city. She thinks that putting together the city map and the sewer map might be a very good combination.

Timothy was telling me about how mr. LeMonte has been teaching him about weapons and seems pretty excited. I felt like I had to tell him that he shouldn't go hoping to kill anything and that weapons should only be used when it's necessary. He said he knows that and is just excited that he can be useful and help us. Which makes me think I probably should try to learn something useful too... perhaps there's a doctor of some sort here?

Ever since I got back mr. LeMonte has been talking to me about the safe zone. He feel it's not as safe as they say, and the bigger threat is inside here rather than on the outside. He insists that Close isn't someone we should trust, but so far Close hasn't shown any particular untrustworthy traits.

Mr. LeMonte says we should just leave and head more south. But I pleaded to him that perhaps we could stay a while longer. To see if Frank gets back. And... well, it's Christmas soon. This place seems secure for now, I'd at least like to have this small thing. Never before have I spent the Christmas season running and fearing for my life.

In the end, I promised mr. LeMonte I would keep my ears and eyes open, just in case I see or hear anything suspicious. Still, we already have to give up some of our stashed equipment to the community, but I feel it's just fair. They let us have food and shelter.

Susan on the other hand feels very positively about this sfe zone, and says that mr. LeMonte is just paranoid. I have to somewhat agree, I see nothing suspicious here. It's safe, isn't it? Also, Andy came to talk with me. He apologized for the way he's been and thanked me for the inhalator. Now that he's calm and collected, Andy is a fairly nice guy. Which is another thing, this safe zone seems to so far have very nice people. There are no troublemakers, at least none I've seen.

But after what LeMonte said, something does strike me as a bit odd: There aren't any children here. The youngest people here are perhaps fourteen. But... it's just a coincidence, I guess? Even in Brittleton, most families with small children left in their cars too, people in this city could've done the same.

So, I'll just try to relax and find something useful to do and learn. And I hope everything goes well.

[survival-diary]

December 18th, Day Thirteen

We found a way out of the basement as we realized the building had a sewer entrance here. Not the most pleasant choice, but it beats the alternative. This route was generally speaking easy to go through, as there weren't that many of the dead here. Some, yes, but it was nothing unbearable.

Susan's expertise also came in handy once we found a map of the sewer network. Downside is we couldn't really find a straight line close to the safe zone but we did trek our way far enough from the larger horde we encountered on the 16th.

Susan figured the safest place to head is the local wastewater treatment plant. As the smell will probably cover our own and won't attract any of the dead. And the plant might have some useful tools for general use as well as beating the zombies out of commission.

Andy has been fidgety all this time and I'm wondering if there's medication he's supposed to be under. Though I would understand such reaction from stress alone. He ended up giving his gun to Susan, as the woman probably would have steadier hand and aim at the moment and I really can't shoot, not properly at least.

We've moved very slowly and carefully here and did make it to the wastewater plant, and Susan found some wrenches and such we might be able to use. She also thinks she might get a truck here in working condition so we could make it faster through the streets to the safe zone. Though I think it might be smarter to move by foot: it makes less noise and I wouldn't like luring the dead to the safe zone.

Also, as the trip was supposed to be just a fw hours, we were given each just a bottle of water, however I packed a few rations with us just in case but those are soon out too. Then again, perhaps eating isn't the biggest priority right now.

Now it's too dark to plan moving out and back to the safe zone, so we'll have to stay put and wait for daylight. I hope Timothy's all right - I guess I should just trust mr. LeMonte. I'm sure he'll take care of my brother.

[survival-diary]

December 17th, Day Twelve: Colbourne's musings #1

I am Colbourne Alexander LeMonte, age 66. I've taken a note of Katherine writing down in a journal and I thought of putting down my own musings from time to time.

Yesterday Katherine, Susan and Frank left with some members of this "safe zone" community to scavenge equipment. Katherine herself decided to go so her younger brother Timothy would not have to. She pleaded me to make sure that Timothy is safe, which I undoubtedly WILL do. For I do not trust this community and I already feel kinship towards Katherine despite our occasional disagreements - not to mention young Timothy reminds me of my son at that age.

Timothy has taken interest in learning how to use guns, which is good. He should know how to protect himself and others. Katherine is yet to ask for lessons, but I believe I should force them onto her, for her own good.

Now, this "safe zone". The community's leader is a man in his early 40s named Edward Close. While I must give the man credit for the initial setup, I find him generally untrustworthy. He is the sort of man more interested in personal gain and welfare rather than the good of the whole community. The moment things start to even vaguely look bad, he most assuredly puts his own well-being above everyone else's.

Of course, selfishness IS part of human nature, but with Close it's somewhat more... nefarious. I try to talk and listen to people to find out what's been going on here since the beginning. I must make sure we have a good course and nothing bad happens to any one of us.

Frank Teller, the man who was previously a mall security officer in New Sheffield is a good man and generally on the level. He also knows how to handle guns but admittedly can be a bit dim. Still, he has proven quite helpful.

Susan Rivers is a woman who apparently once worked in the sewer network of New Sheffield. So far she has not proven herself to be specifically untrustworthy, however I feel I should keep a close eye on her. I'm not sure what it is about her that I find suspect. But so far she has not exactly contributed, not to mention she never seems to lose her calm, no matter the situation. Lastly there is the fact that she seems to be of African descent. I will not be called a "racist", but besides from her, our group has no other "racial diversity". I'm unsure if she feels... at home. And whoever can say what that might lead to?

Now, I've written more than much for a while. I wish the three return safely - and almost as much I hope I'll manage to find something useful about this place.

[survival-diary]

December 16th, Day Eleven

I haven’t been writing for a while now.. and now it’s almost two weeks since this all began. Kind of difficult to comprehend all what’s been going on. And the last couple of days have been… crazy to say the least.

On the 12th and 13th we chose to spent at the gas station. Susan and Frank thought it’s good to strip the place for equipment. Things to patch up the car with just in case something breaks. Which is smart, considering mr.. LeMonte did never take in account of packing extra tires and such things when he prepared for this.

Frank also turned to be an okay shot, so Timothy asked me for permission to take some lessons from him and mr. LeMonte, says he wants to know how to handle a gun - just so he could protect us if something worse were to happen. I reluctantly agreed, telling him things probably couldn’t get much worse.

On the morning of the 14th, we left the gast station and started heading south, and we ended up in Wheeling, though the city has gone to hell by now. However, we did meet a survivor in the streets who told us about a safe zone set up by the city folk. In the end we agreed to enter the place.

On the 15th however mr. LeMonte came to talk with me, saying that he has a bad feeling about Wheeling and this safe zone. At the time I dismissed the idea, but not soon after I heard that they’re expecting everyone to “carry their weight”, which… I suppose is reasonable and makes sense. We are all adults here, after all. Then they said we should give them all of our equipment and rations, which did strike as odd - but still understandable.

However, mr. LeMonte disagreed and told them we aren’t sharing. Not yet. He told them that we’d be staying here only temporarily, as something of a test. The zone’s leader doesn’t seem to like mr. LeMonte - but the feeling is mutual on both their parts.

This morning they asked Timothy to go with a group for gathering supplies and things, which he agreed to himself but I stepped in. I told them I’d take Timothy palce in the city. Saying that Timothy’s still just a kid and should rather stay in the safe zone and train. Whatever to make them leave him alone for now. I don’t want to lose him.

The trip outside on the other hand… Frank and Susan also came with us. I asked for mr. LeMonte to take care of Timothy and he promised to make sure nothing happens to my brother. Despite his oddity.. mr. LeMonte really is a good man, isn’t he?

Then, as we were on the outside, gathering the supplies, the worst did happen. Well, worst I could expect. The dead came in after this young man accidentally set his gun off and alerted them. Our whole group got separated and now I’m stuck in the building’s basement and there is no going out of that door and up. I can still hear the dead groaning there.

Beside me, there’s Susan and a man from the safe zone, he gave his name as Andy. Susan seems to be relatively calm, but this Andy on the other hand is nervous as hell. Seems to be pretty green to all this, too. Then again, considering how little time has passed since the beginning, I’m sure anyone at all would be green. I’m not sure when or how we’ll get out of here. Or when I get a chance to write the next time. I hope mr. LeMonte and Timothy are safe.

[survival-diary]

December 11th, Day Six

Today I'll make only a brief note. Things took a nosedive and I'm not in a mood for much chatter.

As I said earlier, we were meant to leave this morning, but things didn't go all that well. Around 3am the dead got inside the mall, and by the time anyone took note, it was far too late to drive them back out. There was just too many of them.

I was worried to begin with about the number of people leaving as there's only so much room in the station wagon. But turns out there was no need to worry about that. As we were getting down to the parking hall, Beth was grabbed by one of them and the last thing we saw about that was Ben trying to get her out and we weren't exactly in a position to turn back.

So I, Timothy, mr. LeMonte, Susan and Frank made it down to the parking hall and into the car. We crammed what we could in there and left. It wasn't exactly easy doing that either. The streets had started to get rather cramped and the snow's been piling up.

Right now, we've stopped at a gas station. There's also a diner here, so if we get the generator working this might be an okay place to stay - for now at least. It's far enough from the city and we've plenty of room.

Mr. LeMonte insists we head out first thing tomorrow and go south. But I personally think we should consider remaining here - at least a few days - to look out for other people out here. Perhaps he can see some sense in waiting, I'll have to talk with him tomorrow.