Long Lost, Newly Found

Independant Danmachi sideblog for an AU of Bell Cranel, where he is a survivor of Freya's massacre of Hjadningavíg - and also Hedin's assumed-dead son. Low/sporadic activity. Duplicate and OC friendly. Asks welcomed. Follows back from Sailingmakai Penned by Sev

[survivalbias]

You as a Boss Fight

---

"Wh... what? What do you mean? Why are the stats all so high? Why do I even have any stats, I don't even have a Falna?"

[familiasworn]

Hogni was struggling, too many thoughts circling his mind. What would Hedin think? Ahhhh...it was probably going to get out soon anyway...

"H-heh--"

"How p-pitiful, to strut around w-with such obvious--" Freya patted Hogni's back to gently shush him.

"Don't strain yourself. If you need to, go sit in the shade over there, you should still be able to hear us while you rest," she gestured to a nearby bench that wasn't currently exposed to the sunlight. "I didn't mean to out your relationship, I read the situation incorrectly."

Hogni was quiet as he thought about it, then nodded and slowly trudged over to the shade. He took breaths to calm himself as he went.

"Bell...was it?" She looked at Bell again. "I won't ask you to join my Familia, I won't even ask you to like me, nor forgive me. You can hate me--that's your right. But I am wondering...is it safe to assume you're not holding any grudges against Hedin?"

[survivalbias]

Well that was new, Bell thought, an expression of mixed confusion and amusement on his face. Yet another odd side to the man. It seemed connected to his anxiety, though, and Bell couldn't help but wonder if it was a compulsion when he got too wound up.

He noted Freya's care though, glancing at her with eyes narrowed in mistrust and caution. Briefly turning to watch Hogni move and wondering if he indeed had misread the relationship.

He'd have to apologize later, if that was the case.

But back to Freya.

Her question has him blink, though - and then immediately respond;

"No! Of course not. I... had always thought you stole him, if I'm being honest. That it was unwilling, or... because you killed everyone. I was mad at you, not him. Or even Hogni." He hadn't even known Hogni to hate in the first place. "If I was mad at him I wouldn't have bothered looked for him in the first place." He was curious, though... "...Why do you ask?" Pure desire to know, maybe?

[familiasworn]

...What was she supposed to say to that? Apologize? It'd be too late for that(and would it mean much at all if she didn't really mean it anyway?) Freya was sympathetic to his situation, yes...

Though now she wondered...would she have taken Bell too, if she knew Hedin had a son?

A long and drawn out sigh, Hogni had managed to calm himself. "My lady...I only just managed to help them reunite. Please..."

"Doesn't...Hedin seem happier, e-even through that stern expression he always wears...?"

"Hmm...You are right about that. I was wondering about that. I thought it was because of you, actually," Freya smiled and reached up, giving Hogni a pat.

"Ah--hh--?!"

They hadn't told anyone, not even Freya. They didn't find it important during the reunion to tell Bell, either--

[survivalbias]

That made him almost entirely drop his guard.

Bell looked from Freya to Hogni, eyes wide as he registered what had just been said. And implied. It hadn't been said directly, but it plus Hogni's reaction rather indicated it well enough.

"I knew it!" He exclaimed, rage forgotten. "I knew you two were together! I told Eina - there was something about the way you act around each other-" It was too... familiar. It sang just slightly of people he'd seen in relationships, and with how tightly the two seemed to hold to elven traditions, Bell hadn't been able to stop wondering if they were involved.

If they were dating, or partners, or maybe even just terribly codependent in a way they didn't like talking about.

"I almost wish the people back home were still alive just so I could see the looks on their dumb faces." Granted he didn't really remember anyone. Just his father, and even then only barely. Only enough to know the broad strokes of his appearance, enough to be able to look for him.

(and he only knew his name because it had been written down. He'd had the presence of mind to take some belongings with him back then, had held onto them for years for fear of forgetting)

"Well, from what I've seen so far, you're... good together. I don't know you very well, and I can't say I know dad very well now either, but... From what I've seen, yeah~" He grabbed eagerly onto the more cheerful mood.

Anything to shove the Anger away.

Hogni was having a bad enough day already, Bell wagered, just from this meeting alone.

[survivalbias]

And just like that, he was snapped out of the rage.

Now he just felt guilty.

Still terrified, because Freya was still there. But oh. He'd forgotten that Hogni had confidence issues.

And Freya was already on him, meaning Bell did not want to get too close, because the last time he'd seen her was when she was coercing two entire populations to slaughter each other, and he was petrified she'd make him... well. Finish the job.

All he could offer was something close to an explanation.

...Maybe he could rely on his father already knowing he existed, to keep him alive... Damn it-

"...Bell Selland." He says to her, lowering his staff - gripping it with both hands because he was positive the free hand would shake otherwise. "Hedin Selland's son." Hogni was likely upset because he was caught between defending his goddess and defending Hedin's son. No right action, no way to really diffuse it in an optimal way. Bell could not be made to love their goddess, but Hogni likely didn't want to be angry about it since he'd have known what Bell was made to live through.

It was a fair reason to hate, after all. Being left abandoned as a small child on an island of corpses he could not deal with nor move, not until they'd long begun to rot away.

"...You don't... have to defend me, Hogni." Bell added, after a moment. Briefly glancing at him before returning his gaze to Freya. "Freya's a goddess. You probably can't convince her of anything, if she decides she doesn't wanna listen." Why she'd approached him though, he was still curious about.Had it genuinely been just his staff...?

[familiasworn]

Hogni expressed surprise at Bell's admittance. While Bell hadn't exactly told them outright that he wasn't fond of Freya--or was it gods in general--he could at least understand. He could see it in his minute expressions and behavior...and especially now as his thoughts were confirmed.

The other tip-off was that...Bell hadn't sought to join the Familia after confirming who his father was.

Freya also looked surprised. Almost stunned, even. Hogni was taller than she was, so she had to slowly shift to the side to look at Bell again. "Hedin...had a son?" She looked to be grappling with that new revelation, outright revealing that she didn't know and that Hedin hadn't told anybody.

Not even his precious goddess.

"...He always was terrifyingly good at hiding his grief," she murmured. "He never uttered a word, even when I asked..."

[survivalbias]

She... hadn't known?

She hadn't known?

How had she not known - had she truly just shown up, saw two elves she liked, and acted? Without thinking?

All the more reason to hate her, he though, stomping down a brand new gush of rage. It wasn't useful here, not beyond potentially damaging his relationship with Hogni, and maybe making enemies of a goddess.

"...What was he supposed to say, 'by the way I had a son you probably got brutally slaughtered'?" Bell didn't care to be gentle. Granted, part of him was horrified at the idea of being blunt - especially the tiny part of him that remembered how pretty she had seemed when all he'd known was her voice - but part of him also couldn't help himself.

The staff was lowered fully though, finally released into one hand with the other clenched at his side.

She seemed genuinely surprised.

"I was little, unless you told him what you were planning, he wouldn't have had any reason to think I'd survived everyone just... killing each other. ...Don't even know how I did, I just. Hid, until the noise stopped." And apparently not even the gods knew how that happened.

Luck, probably. Pure dumb luck.

"...Until a little while ago I didn't even know where you took him. Just that you showed up, made everyone kill each other, then stole my dad."

[familiasworn]

...Unfortunately for Bell, the best defense against a god figuring out a lie was actually to remain silent. Say nothing. With their Arcanum sealed in the lower world, gods were unable to see the truth, but they were still able to tell when the children lie.

"...I don't believe I was going to ask you to join my Familia. Your soul is a little too twisted for my tastes."

--Hogni was trembling slightly, it was all so dizzying. Hedin would know what to do. He so badly wanted to activate Dainsleif, but there was no quiet way to do it, they'd both notice the circle when it appeared beneath his feet.

Ohhh...why did it have to be him??

"Hhhh..." Ah, how pitiful. He always tried so hard...he never wanted to show his cowardly side to Freya, yet here he was, panicking, trying to sort through his mess of thoughts...

"...Hogni?" Freya placed both of her hands on both sides of his head, wondering if that would calm or at least ground him. "Are you okay?"

[survivalbias]

And just like that, he was snapped out of the rage.

Now he just felt guilty.

Still terrified, because Freya was still there. But oh. He'd forgotten that Hogni had confidence issues.

And Freya was already on him, meaning Bell did not want to get too close, because the last time he'd seen her was when she was coercing two entire populations to slaughter each other, and he was petrified she'd make him... well. Finish the job.

All he could offer was something close to an explanation.

...Maybe he could rely on his father already knowing he existed, to keep him alive... Damn it-

"...Bell Selland." He says to her, lowering his staff - gripping it with both hands because he was positive the free hand would shake otherwise. "Hedin Selland's son." Hogni was likely upset because he was caught between defending his goddess and defending Hedin's son. No right action, no way to really diffuse it in an optimal way. Bell could not be made to love their goddess, but Hogni likely didn't want to be angry about it since he'd have known what Bell was made to live through.

It was a fair reason to hate, after all. Being left abandoned as a small child on an island of corpses he could not deal with nor move, not until they'd long begun to rot away.

"...You don't... have to defend me, Hogni." Bell added, after a moment. Briefly glancing at him before returning his gaze to Freya. "Freya's a goddess. You probably can't convince her of anything, if she decides she doesn't wanna listen." Why she'd approached him though, he was still curious about.Had it genuinely been just his staff...?

[familiasworn]

"...My lady," Hogni was working on steeling himself, but having to talk back or put himself in front of Freya as a blockade had him panicking. What should he do? It was Freya's wish--

But this was Hedin's son...

"Please--"

He further put himself between Bell and Freya, knowing full well the young elf wasn't a threat. At least not to him.

"You know I don't like being cooped up in the tower, or in Folkvangr, Hogni. I simply got curious," she was looking directly at Bell--and paused.

"Oh...your soul is a pretty one. A little cloudy, a little hazy...but the relatively same shade as Hedin's. Are you related?"

"Lady Freya," Hogni's voice was a little more firm, catching her attention once more. "Please, even you should be able to see he's not comfortable."

[survivalbias]

You can't lie to a god.

He knows that.

There is no right way to answer her question. Not the way he wants. She'll know if he lies, she'll know if he doesn't say anything. He has no options but truth.

He HATES it. He hates HER.

(His heart is pounding in his chest, he wants to go back to his inn room and hide there for the next week.)

"Does it matter?" He responds, eventually - little embers flicking off the staff in tiny angry jags. Bell pauses a moment to get himself under control - even if the attack is accidental, even if it does nothing, he's sure it would be taken poorly and get him in trouble.

Most likely it would hit Hogni, though. And he doesn't wanna hit Hogni.

(Hogni has been nice so far)

"Doesn't matter who I'm related to, I'm not joining you." The word 'you' is almost spat, and he spars a moment to glance at Hogni, suddenly painfully aware that his tone and phrasing was... not kind. It gave away his feelings far too clearly. But he couldn't quite stop himself, either. "You couldn't pay me. Not all the money in the world." Another moment is spared to try and slow his breathing. Control. Easy. She won't do anything. Not here. No in public.

"...I've had nightmares about you ever since I was little." Does she know? Does she care?

(He doubts it)

[familiasworn]

"My...that's a beautiful relic," a voice like chimes sounded. The quiet park had become all the more hushed the moment of her arrival, yet she seemed to have gone unnoticed by the elf, seated all on his lonesome.

"You have quite the gentle hand, cleaning it--"

"--M-my lady!!" A familiar dark elf had suddenly situated himself between the goddess and smaller elf.

"Refrain, I plead. The visage of her grace is yet deep rooted in the psyche...I-it's not wise..." he was gently trying to nudge her further away and coax her to leave the area...

[survivalbias]

It takes him a second.

Bell had never heard her voice, and so for a second, just a second, he finds himself captivated and wanting badly to know who had spoken. Who the voice belonged to.

But then.

Then, he looks up from his weapon - and freezes.

He might not know her voice, but he knows that face. It's slightly different from the face in his nightmares, but he knows her he knows her he knows her-

The monster from his youth, the source of everyone's death even if only indirectly.

He's frozen.

And then, he isn't - using the staff, slashed jaggedly as it was along its once-broken haft with gold and Other Materials, to push himself to his feet. The staff is twirled, adjusted mid-spin, and held out as though in threat. (he knows that he can't actually attack her, but it makes him feel safer).

It helps that Hogni steps in between them rather quickly. Seems the Dark Elf doesn't think this meeting wise. Another point to them not, in fact, being controlled.

"...Thank you." Is his stiff, shaky response, as he stares daggers at her. Ready to bolt if he gets a chance. "I got it from back home." What did she want. Why did he have to see her now. "What do you want." He voices the thought in his mind, uncaring to how vastly different his tone likely is from the prior meeting with Hogni and Hedin.

There's no cheer in it. Just stone and thorns - and desperately veiled terror.

[survivalbias]

"I wonder... who owned you." He mutters to himself, holding his branch-staff. Quietly cleaning it off, because he may have been raised by humans, but the idea of just leaving his weapons dirty is something he cannot fathom. "Dark elf? White? What story do you hold...? Not even dad would know, I bet. Or Hogni. It's been so long." And they probably would rather think about anything else.

The owner of one weapon would not matter to either of them.

...A shame.

[survivalbias]

He sits on the grass, humming - staff in hand. The thing indeed looks very much like a tree branch, with a vaguely diagonal jag of gold about halfway through. Slowly, very slowly, he works a polish along it, seeming content and deep in his work.

It seems he takes good care of his weapons, ordinary as they are compared to Adventurer's gear.

[familiasworn]

She had some free time away from her familia today. Away from Loki, away from Executive duties...just a simple walk through Orario felt like it'd do her some good. As she walked a head of bright fluffy hair caught her attention.

...She couldn't remember this elf. Was he unaffiliated?

"--Pardon me," she spoke with a clear and concise tone to catch his attention. "I haven't seen you around here..." like she would know every elf, "what is your name?"

[survivalbias]

Bell turned at the voice - tensing ever so slightly when he saw her.

Distant memories, distant knowledge - books he'd read if only because he was alone and had no way to get more - or possibly had read before, with his father. And something internal that just knew.

Barely even thinking about it, he bowed.

And then when he stood, paused. And blinked. That was... new. It felt natural in a way he wasn't sure he liked, and even despite that, he couldn't bring himself to even consider treating her with suspicion.

Was she a god? He hoped not. A sigh (the best he could manage while she was still in eyesight), and he let the feeling win.

Politeness it was. He supposed it would be rude to do otherwise with no idea as to what was really going on.

"I'm Bell." He responded - leaving out his last name more from habit than anything else. "I haven't been here too long, actually - maybe a few months? I don't think it's been a year yet. You probably haven't seen me much because I don't go out a lot. I work at Wishe, but that's about it. And I'm not in a Familia, either, so I stay in a lot otherwise." Then, he gave her a smile, and added- "It's nice to meet you, Ma'am."

It was unlikely they would have met up much even if he did spend a lot of time in the city - Orario was big, too big to just stumble onto somebody you didn't know more than once or twice. Then again, maybe she spent a lot of time outside?

He'd be polite either way.

[survivalbias]

He's out and about in the city! Wearing rather worn clothes. Technically speaking, they don't really stick out that much - but they're likely shockingly 'low quality' for an elf.

Bell doesn't seem bothered, though - frankly he looks very comfortable.

But god forbid any full-elves see him....

[survivalbias]

"...What do you do when your dad is in a Familia.... with... somebody you hate." He says. His words sound very carefully chosen.

[survivalbias]

Your most beautiful feature

"My... My what? Has somebody been sniffing me?"

[familiasworn]

He was quick to exit the inn with Bell so that the receptionist's awkwardness about him being there would stop effecting him as much as it was. Once they were outside and walking along the same shadows as before, their destination was the forest.

Hogni didn't make any comment about Bell not knowing much(if anything at all) about their traditions. He knew it was their fault.

"R-regrettably, prior commitments established before knowledge of your existence came to call. But..." he rummaged in the basket and removed a little bag and handed it to him. "He wished for me to bestow upon you these...Seeds that he chose himself...Seeds he would have planted."

[survivalbias]

Seeds. That his dad had chosen?

That felt... oddly important. What did they grow into, Bell wondered, as he gingerly took the little bag of seeds. He doubted they were particularly delicate, but at the same time he found he didn't want to risk it.

"That makes sense." He responded, nodding. "Finding out I wasn't actually dead wouldn't really have been something he took into account when he made his plans~" Bell chuckled, as they walked. He kept an eye on Hogni - metaphorically - just in case the 'forest' they were going to was a different one than before.

Did the location even matter, as long as it was 'in the forest'? Perhaps he ought to ask, but honestly, Bell still felt a bit too embarrassed to bother.

"...If he picked these out, though, then he'll be here in spirit, and that's good enough for me." Bell continued, sounding not in the least bit upset. "Is this part of the... Solstice? Are we planting them?" It made sense. Spring was when things started to grow.

...Would anyone be upset if he... kept one or two, to plant in a pot at home? To keep, because his dad picked them out, which made him want one in some childish kind of way.

[survivalbias]

He doesn't say anything. He agrees, and agrees wholeheartedly with that assessment.

But he's smart enough to not say anything.

[familiasworn]

"That's..." he glanced at the receptionist, who cleared his throat and turned around to start organizing the available keys at random. "I came to collect you..."

Hogni held up a small basket of picnic foods which also had a little bag tucked in the corner. "I have not celebrated the spring solstice in...years. I was hoping you would join me in the forest. W-we might see other elves out there, too..."

He would rather not be seen alone.

If he had an instrument he knew how to play, he'd have that with him too, but alas...he had no such talent in musical artistry.

[survivalbias]

He hadn't celebrated... in years? That sounded... sad, actually, and Bell couldn't help but wonder why the man hadn't gone. Preference? Business?

...Did their Goddess not let them...?

He wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.

"Oh - well. I can do research other days. I'd be happy to join you~!" The books weren't gonna go anywhere, he thought, giving Hogni a reassuring grin. He was doing well, for a guy that clearly would rather be alone most of the time. "Though it.. does mean I'll be going into this as blind as before..." Here, he had the decency to look embarassed.

Bell knew nothing about Elves. Nothing about the holidays. It made him wonder if he'd get any dirty looks admitting that to other Elves, that all he knew was human celebrations.

"You think dad's gonna be there?" He asked curiously, softly, moving towards the exit in efforts of getting Hogni into a more open area with easier ways to hide from others perception. "Or is he busy, with... your Goddess?"

[familiasworn]

|| Spring Solstice

@survivalbias

Hogni left Folkvangr with a quiet hum, mainly keeping to the shadows of the buildings and followed that same path to the Inn that Bell said he was staying at. Upon entering, he stilled as his eyes met the receptionist--who also froze in kind.

Never had he thought one of Freya's executives would just waltz right in--

Hogni cleared his throat.

"Th...the little rabbit of an elf..." he stammered slightly. "Pray tell what room he occupies..."

[survivalbias]

Spring was going to be returning soon. Bell was looking forward to the returning warmth, flowers and greenery and the ability to maybe put his fern outside for some more direct sunlight. He was sure the little plant would enjoy real sun better than some artificial stonelamp setup.

Maybe he'd get to see it flower again - tiny white things on the end of long floppy stems, that looked oddly cute~

On the subject of spring, though...

Wasn't there more than one Solstice?

Would Hogni be celebrating that one, too? Perhaps he should, as well. Not that he... knew what to do, there. All Bell knew of ANY solstice was that it was a period of time near the ends or beginnings of certain seasons.

Perhaps he could go research them, and surprise both his dad and Hogni with it, later!

Bell grinned as he darted outside of his room, goal in mind - freezing at the sight of the exact man he'd been thinking about. Hogni was... here? In the open?

"Hogni - I... actually didn't expect you to come by." He usually seemed too people-shy to bother. "Unless you're here for a different reason - I was gonna go do some research about.... holidays, and festivals and stuff." Elven cultural things that he knew so little about.

He was kind of disappointed in himself for not bothering to look into any of this until just now.