( + ) XXVII .

P/S : I speak my mind and personal through here so trigger warning included | My previous url @nyctophiliac-s, nephilium-s, coidvs, basilisk-s, reservoir-s, etc | I'm Jay / Von / V | 27 | a She / Her / They | Scorpio | Profile under maintenance | P/S : I've been here for 12 years since 2010. This is a strict blog.

[sweatblvvdtears]

a concerned friend @ me : are u sure u ok because u don't seem alright

me, in straight face expression with in red teary eyes also with dead looking eyes because recently out of my Antidepressant pill that been holding my Depression, Anxiety and PTSD while sitting on couch while in middle of playing game on my Nintendo Switch : ya, i'm cool wdym i'm not, aye i just chilling mate

Me, few minutes later : *stares deeply at wall with blank looks in full focus and looking a little confused*

Someone who sees it : uh i don't think she's fine

My friend who knows i'm getting back on my pills : oh she's fine, it just her pills makes her do unusual things or weird combo like that because of healing process. Better than she stuck in hospital room or worser that will only makes her sad

4 hours later, sniffles from across room : f UcK

[sweatblvvdtears]

man, i hate getting out from my antidepressant pill when i went broke then when i taking back my pill, my head hurts whole day and it makes me feel like zombie fr and i could cry any moment for how soft like sponge my emotions also mental get. I was staring at my co-workers in dead stare for like few long minutes for this reason after my pill kicked in under 24 hour because bruh being in antidepressant ain't fun after you skipped whole long ass days haha

[more-than-ideas]

Charlotte Lapalus

[liberatingreality]

There is no stronger drug than reality.

Warrel Dane

[uaravsh]

"Love isn't soft, like those poets say. Love has teeth which bite and the wounds never close."

- 𝚂𝚝𝚎𝚙𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙺𝚒𝚗𝚐, The Body (@uaravsh)

[x0401x]

[sweatblvvdtears]

... Huh.. It have been a while since I got here. It feels forever. How is everyone on here? These 2 years ½ have been painful for me honestly and I had to ran away from my home IRL. I've been on 24 hour on my Antidepressant pill even and sadly, I involved with Psychiatric, Hospital Appointments every month but, I live alone now. I got my own Condominium room & my own Nintendo Switch to play anytime now, I guess.. My IRL father tried to kill me before and a good non-government organization helped me with Shelter + running away also provided me with support, needs etc because I've been involved with Domestic Violence case, toxic environment and I lived with Abuser for near my whole life. I'm tired running away honestly & I'm tired feeling pain constantly but it's okay I guess.. I got professional diagnosed with Depression, Anxiety and PTSD. I always knew I have them a long time ago. Just now they diagnosed me professionally. I've had been injected with sleeping fluid even to calm my pain down. God knows I'm tired and been battling many pain these few years. In silent even. I will be okay one day, I guess? Hm..

[valentina-poem]

[valentina-poem]

[valentina-poem]

[tired-tired]

Therapist: how do u feel

Me: I don’t know

Therapist: on a scale of 1 to 10, where is your mood right now

Me: I....don’t..

[mountainapparition]

Starting new antidepressants is always weird. It’s like I can feel too much of my body.

[hiforever-deactivated20200506]

one of the hardest pills to swallow is accepting the fact that you can’t force someone to care, to love you, to be invested. it either comes naturally or not at all. 

[wikipediapictures]

Adhesive bandage

[valentina-poem]

[bpdamn]

sorry for looking like i just cried for an hour. it’s just that i cried for an hour

[shingerion]

toji fushiguro

by jj59u on twitter