♡ @sweetlylaceds - Tumblr Blog

࣪ Andrew , : Nill

( 🪽 ) —— any prns . agdr . teen

᠃ ᠌ ᠌let's get lost ! ::

I think my problem is that I stopped drawing for myself, I became so insane with people liking my art that drawing for myself isn't an option anymore like I don't draw what I like I draw what people would like, that's why I keep holding myself back from doing what **I** want

Andrew is a really good example, I keep picking from people's designs and drawings of him because I don't trust myself I'm so scared of falling under the mischaracterization category and it PAINS me guys I feel like I'm useless I'm not worthy of the title artist when come on I've been drawing for now 13 years

no one really comforted me in the idea that people could enjoy my real art the one that *I* like and speaks my emotions and creativity through

I don't want art to feel like a curse for me but more life continues more I hate myself I hate drawing I hate every little thing about myself I can't act right GOD

#🪽⠀;⠀vent⠀ﾉ⠀❛

sweetlylaceds

"nill are you ok" I want to draw Verity but I also want to draw Marshall as I want to draw Andrew oh I already wanted to draw Ivan too yk oh oh and I wanted to draw Nap too but unfortunately iTrapped is also in the listFUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK

sweetlylaceds

actually little did you know I have 2 Andrew drawings that I still haven't finished but very close to

not because they are hard to finish I'm just a lazy bum

#🪽⠀;⠀;⠀normal⠀ﾉ⠀♡

look at my capybara

#🪽⠀:⠀:⠀random⠀ﾉ⠀☆

"nill are you ok" I want to draw Verity but I also want to draw Marshall as I want to draw Andrew oh I already wanted to draw Ivan too yk oh oh and I wanted to draw Nap too but unfortunately iTrapped is also in the listFUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK

#🪽⠀;⠀;⠀normal⠀ﾉ⠀♡

discord drama is no joke like why are your friends showing you my HARMLESS vents and instead of telling them to not do that you unfriend me SONNNN

literally me venting about how unfair it is that I had to distance myself from our friend group because YOU were ableist towards systems and joked about my amnesia at your grown age bfr

#🪽⠀:⠀:⠀random⠀ﾉ⠀☆

sweetlylaceds

i miss my friends

and I also want to have new friends

I don't like being alone :(

sweetlylaceds

I mean I kinda did that to myself since like. since Friday I decided to take a break from discord because my mental health was just getting worse and now yeah I feel better because I have some kind of time for myself but I'm alone and there's nothing I hate more than being ALONE

i miss my friends

and I also want to have new friends

I don't like being alone :(

#🪽⠀;⠀vent⠀ﾉ⠀❛

I FUCKING LOVE VERITY

#🪽⠀:⠀:⠀random⠀ﾉ⠀☆

a very stupid fact about myself, I draw without my glasses

just so you realize what that implies, I have a very bad eyesight it's so bad that without my glasses I see NOTHING like my phone (who's right in front of my fucking face) is kinda blurry, I still can read and see what's on the screen but not good at all

I also have an untreated lazy eye, my glasses help it a lot but I can't wear eyepatches (I just cannot like it) and the second I take off my glasses that said lazy eye GOES CRAZYYYY

so like. yeah. there is no reason why i draw without my glasses, I've been unconsciously taking off my glasses every time I use my phone I'm just a weird human being I guess