My Brain's a Bomb @sxerudeboy - Tumblr Blog

I don't come on here much anymore. I just sit around and sleep. This is the worst my depression has been in a while. Hope everyone is well.

pre-party

Bored of everything. Still not feeling like myself. Having a broken down truck doesn't help. I don't really want to go anywhere but at the same time I'm at my breaking point. I just want to talk to a stranger who needs a ride somewhere someone I can vent to who can't really judge me because they don't know me. I'm missing my friends too. The people who actually appreciate me and let me know I'm appreciated. Things are getting tough though. My muscular dystrophy is really starting to catch up to me and going places is becoming tougher. A lot of my friends don't seem to understand that and it makes me seem like an asshole. I've developed hip pain that makes it even harder to walk around. I actually sit in a wheel chair now once the pain becomes too unbearable. My social life has become non-existent. So, the dating thing has become something that isn't going to happen. Some people have all the luck and have someone fall in love with them before they're diagnosed with a horrible disease. I've kind of accepted the fact that not everyone is meant to find somebody. I just wanna feel like I did 16 years ago. Still being able to ride a bike and be somewhat physically active and you know, being able to get up off the floor without help. I haven't been able to ride a bike for somewhere around 14 years. I'd love to hop trains and start over but that's an impossible dream.

#bored #muscular dystrophy #lonely #sad #depression #wanna do something #29 and lost #sxerudeboy

No matter how shitty this world is, stepping outside and looking up at a bright full moon makes me feel alright.

#it's love #my favorite relationship #full moon #moon #lets get lunar #sxerudeboy

Ever notice that the same people who say, "guns don't kill people, people do" are the same people who get mad at people "disrespecting" an inanimate object?

#it's a piece of cloth #it's just a song #hypocrisy

Just thought about how long it's been since I've had an actual shower. No wonder I'm single.

#I'm gross #depression #maybe just lazy #do baby wipes count?#used the sink a couple times

youknow-me-not-my-story

Whoever's sexually frustrated raise your hand🙋

This boredom is killing me. I really gotta get this truck fixed. In really sick off being stuck in this box.

The more I hear this president speak, the more I want to murder him.

End of the Summer Bon Fire from Saturday night. I joined the festivities of the last party of the summer with the same playlist they use every damn time. I left my comfort zone of my front porch and decided to fuck with my camera.

#fire #bon fire #end of summer #sxerudeboy #can't afford a DSLR #close enough

I've wrote out and deleted 3 whole posts. I like to pretend like people care sometimes.