Inni Mnih / War & Peace
In which Rory accidentally falls asleep and wakes up to a new achievement; alternatively: Rory’s Now A Level Six Friend And Unlocks The Tragic Backstory
@roryybriar
Title
Word Count: 4443
tw: blood, violence, oppression
REZA
Reza was getting used to this whole ‘running for public office’ thing. He wasn’t needing to cut a valium in half and take it when thinking about it too hard anymore, so that was a start. Aurora still had the fire lit under her feet more than he did, but you know, he was invested.
Even if he hadn’t lived in town long, it was important to him that this be a safe place for his family. For at least the next two years, until Lamia’s finished her undergrad at least, he’d be here, helping support her education. If she chose to go to medical school at Pride U as well, then Reza would probably stay here. Moving was a hassle. Why leave somewhere you’re comfortable? If Lamia chose to go elsewhere, Reza and Fadela probably wouldn’t tag along next time. If he did move, he’d probably just go back to Tunisia- dangerous and unfavorable for sorcerers, but home - or Austria, since his mother was there. Maybe New Zealand would be a good place to settle; magick-friendly, lots of fluffy sheep. Not a bad place.
Then again, maybe Swynlake, England, will grow on him more than it already has. Maybe he already has settled.
He turned his head to Aurora, his apprentice and campaign manager, and tried to peek at the writing in her notebook.
AURORA
Aurora was loving being a campaign manager. Really, she was having the time of her life! What she wasn’t loving was how it was fucking with her sleep schedule.
Her naps were all over the place, she was taking more potions to stay awake through events; not to mention the fucking cursed cymbal monkey was causing her to lose sleep, too. Overall, Aurora was Tired All The Time.
Take, for example, right now. She knew she and Reza were supposed to be going over practice questions for the debates and finalizing some of the details for their first fundraiser, but she was falling asleep on the job. The curse pulled at her body, exhaustion washing over her as gravity seemed to press her down into Reza’s couch, and her head lolled and nodded as she struggled to stay awake. She barely noticed Reza trying to peek at her notebook, and halfheartedly nudged him away with her bare foot against his leg. She tried to think of something witty to say about keeping his eyes on his own paper, but only managed a small mumble of gibberish and a large yawn.
REZA
“Aurora,” Reza began quietly. “I can drive you home if you’re too tired for this today, we can work on this later. You’ve been drilling questions into my head so much that I have answers and counterpoints memorized verbatim.”
And that wasn’t a joke. At all. Something true about Aurora was that whenever she lacked experience, she made up for it in droves with her determination.
Whether on the campaign trail, or in his workshop, Reza didn’t doubt her ability to do well - even if, with the latter, it took a lot of trial and error. (For now. See, now that he knew about her curse, it was a challenge for him, a code he had to crack, and it was going to drive him mad if he didn’t stop thinking about it.)
AURORA
Aurora knew the moment Reza asked that she was not going to make it home. She could barely keep her eyes open now, she’d be out like a light before they even got to the car. So instead, she just shook her head, sliding down further into the couch and bringing her knees closer to her chest.
“Won’-” she yawned “- make it. I’ll be fine. Jus’ sleepy.”
Her head dipped towards her chest, and within moments, the curse had pulled her back under and Aurora was deep asleep; curled around her notebook like a stuffed toy.
REZA
Reza shook his head at her as she fell asleep. Annoyed? No. Disappointed that she bothered coming today when she was feeling so tired? A little. He never wanted her to put her own health on the backburner to run his campaign, or to come over and study.
As he watched her curl around the notebook like it was her teddy, Reza clicked his tongue at her and just kind of...paused there a moment. Let her sleep, he knew that much from her naps during lessons. Except those naps were in his workshop when Fadela and Lamia wouldn’t be around to disturb her.
The living room of their house was not so sacred. Any minute now, they’d be home from their trip to NTO and Reza was not going to have a tired, angry Aurora in campaign manager mode versus student mode on his hands.
He simply refused.
“My knee is going to hate me in an hour,” he muttered, his decision made. Gently, Reza, gently. He slid his arms under her sleeping figure and scooped her up with mild hesitation - being deadweight and all - making sure her head didn’t flop about.
The walk to his bedroom was just up the stairs - the guest bedroom downstairs was full of boxes from the move, still two years later, and Lamia used the spare upstairs as a study room, and he wasn’t about to walk into the disaster zones that were his sisters’ bedrooms. For two people who like their work spaces just so, their living spaces told another story.
Reza placed Rory on top of his made up bed and scanned the room for a blanket.
Should he cover her? Of course he should. Did she sleep with a ceiling fan on? Better to wake up a little chilly than drenched in sweat, probably.
He carefully laid a blanket over her, left the fan on, and kept the door cracked so he might hear her wake up. Other than keeping an ear out, she was at the back of his mind as he started dinner. Sundays were one of Reza’s nights to cook.
AURORA
It was nearly two hours before Aurora began to stir in Reza’s bed. She shifted closer to the pillows, legs thrown haphazardly across the bed as she breathed in deep. It wasn’t the somewhat-familiar smell of Reza’s house that greeted her, though; instead the smell of laundry soap and the faint smell of man sweat. The oddness of the fact began to pull Aurora closer to wakefulness, and she rolled onto her back as she stretched and arched.
Yeah, this was way more space than she should have on the couch. Where was she?
Aurora propped herself up on her elbows as she looked around sleepily, blinking the magic and exhaustion from her eyes. She was in… a room? A man’s room, by the look of it. But why would she be in a-
Oh. Right. Reza.
Had she been more awake, the revelation might have sent her scrambling out of bed, embarrassed and red from head to toe. Insted, she just groaned and flopped back onto the bed, one arm over her eyes. Great, she had passed out and then put to bed like a child. Always fun.
(Wait, did that mean that Reza had carried her to bed, and she had missed it? She loved being carried; one of the perks of being Objectively Tiny.)
Grumbling lowly, Aurora rolled onto her side as she slowly worked her way to being fully awake. She found herself looking at Reza’s bedside table, and a young, grinning face greeted her from inside a dark frame. Aurora propped her head up a little higher on her arm, reaching out to the picture to try and get a closer look, but her fingers only landing on the edge of the side table instead.
Who was she?
REZA
She’s been out for a while, Fadela had said, helping herself to the dinner he was still cooking. Reza’s swatted her hand away and explained that that’s narcolepsy, and it wasn’t the first time. He didn’t mention that he suspected Rory’d been losing sleep over the cursed cymbals monkey thing, because Fadela would have only made fun of her.
We get it, Fadela, you’re a stone cold bitch.
Though.
Fadela was right. It had been two hours, so maybe it was worth checking on her to see if she was alive. He was not in the mood to hide a body today, thank you.
When he got to the top of the stairs, he didn’t hear her rustling around, as she’d stopped by then, so he turned on his heel to go back downstairs until he remembered - oh, right. Checking on someone required looking at them.
He pushed open his bedroom door just enough to peek at her, and assuming she was still asleep, grabbed the handle to pull the door closed again as he made to back away.
AURORA
She heard the door open a bit, and shifted her head to look at the door and away from the mysterious little girl with the pretty curls of dark hair and warm eyes.
Or at least, attempt to look at the door through her hair. She hadn’t pulled it up before passing out, so it was A Hot Mess.
She could barely make out a tall figure on the other side, and hummed quietly at the back of her throat in greeting. It was quiet, barely-there sound, and Aurora didn’t really expect Reza to hear her.
REZA
Reza was a father. And a big brother who practically raised Lamia. His ears were fine-tuned to hear soft noises coming from sleepy daughters, sisters, and friends. He pushed his door open again and walked toward his bed, stopping a respectable ten feet or so away.
“You’re up?”
AURORA
Aurora watched Reza approach, shifting a little so she wasn’t twisted up all over the bed as much. “Gettin’ there,” she responded, her voice soft and husky with sleep. She smiled up at him - or at least attempted to, she was still half asleep. “Thanks fer lettin’ me sleep here,” she murmured before glancing back at the photo.
There was a family resemblance, definitely. Seeing Reza in the room with her only made it more obvious. “This Lamia?” Aurora asked softly, reaching out and falling short of the photo once again, instead tapping the edge of the nightstand.
REZA
His mouth was open to say ‘it was nothing’ when his eyes followed Aurora’s hand to the nightstand, and continuing onto her hand’s intended target when it missed. He snapped his mouth shut and crossed the room to the side of his bed to snatch up the picture.
“No.” Reza said, a bit too urgently and too harshly, as he stared at the picture of the smiling little girl in traditional dress with palpable longing.
How could he forget it was there and not take it with him?
Well, he knew why. Because Reza trusted Aurora, because his guard was down around her. And, he didn’t need to be afraid here, he didn’t need to hide any evidence of his child like in Tunisia. It was different for sorcerers here.
“This is a picture of my daughter.”
AURORA
Whatever response she had been expecting, that wasn't it. Aurora drew her hand back as quickly as she could with her heavy limbs when Reza crossed the room, blinking up at him in innocent and somewhat startled confusion.
His harsh 'no’ was a little like a slap to the face, waking her a little more just from the shock. What the hell had she done wrong? She wasn't snooping, the photo was literally right there.
She watched him look at the photo for a moment, silently marveling at how soft his features had gone in an instant even as her own confusion only increased.
“This is a picture of my daughter.”
Aurora blinked at him, still tucked safely against his pillows and under his blanket. “Daughter?” she asked softly.
REZA
“Yes,” Reza said, his gaze fixated on the picture, one hand gripping the frame tight, the other, tracing the lines of his little girl’s face. “She was four in this picture. I haven’t held her in over three years.”
He cleared his throat, pushing down the wetness there.
Though nothing could stop his arms from aching for his sweet little girl.
“I miss her very much. She was the highlight of every single day; just. First thing in the morning I woke up to.”
AURORA
Aurora watched Reza silently; the way he carefully traced the lines of his daughter's face, the longing in his eyes. It was a side of him she had never seen before, and she couldn't help but think it was incredibly sweet.
(Though there was a tiny voice in the back of her head that whispered “Why didn't he tell me about her before?”)
“She's beautiful,” Aurora said softly. She wanted to ask where she was, why his daughter wasn't living with him, but she didn't want to risk upsetting him. Especially since - judging by the way he was talking about her - there was probably a 50/50 chance she had died.
The thought made Aurora want to cry. She thought of her little girl from the Hunger Games, of her body hitting the floor with a tiny, final thud, and shoved that thought as far from her head as she could.
“Wha's her name?” Aurora asked instead, shifting onto her back as she could look up at Reza easier. She felt like she should have more questions than that, but her brain was still waking up.
REZA
“Thanks, I made that.” He joked, looking up from the photograph just long enough to give Rory a playful grin.
His little girl was his proudest accomplishment. She was sweet, funny, and clever, and he loved her so much. Their three times weekly video chats were all he lived for.
“Sabiha Ibitsam Ghadir Basira bint Reza Kasraoui-Müller. Sabiha means bright like morning, and she always was. Is still, I’m sure.” Reza looked over at Rory with a sad smile. “I only have her through video chat right now. She’s in Tunisia.”
AURORA
Oh, sweet, not dead. Aurora felt much less guilty about giggling at Reza’s joke now.
“Tha’s a lovely name,” she told him with a soft smile. “I would butcher it, but tha’s on me.”
Stretching her arms over her head one more time - the stretch going all the way down to her toes - Aurora slowly pushed herself up, stopping midway to let the blood rush through her head as it rolled around the room before landing back on her shoulders. It took a moment, but soon she was upright, one knee hugged close to her chest as she rested her cheek against it.
“At least yer able to chat with her,” Aurora offered softly. “Why didn’t she move here with ye?” Tunisia was a dangerous place for Magicks to be, wasn't it? She couldn't imagine Reza would leave her behind for no reason.
REZA
He waited for her to get situated, smiling fondly at her and then keeping the expression as he looked back down at Sabiha’s picture.
At her question, he almost physically recoiled. There wasn’t judgement in her voice or her expression, but he harbored plenty for the both of them. He was a terrible father, leaving his half-fairy sorceress daughter in Tunisia while he was safe. Even if it wasn’t really his choice it was inexcusable.
“You don’t have to act like you aren’t thinking it. I know even calling me a father is...generous.” He set her picture down in its place on the nightstand, his fingers lingering over her face, before he cleared his throat and moved over to his desk, leaning back against it instead of bothering to sit down.
He cleared his throat again and avoided looking at Rory, as if the shame he felt was physically preventing him.
“Her mother is in Tunisia still. With her. She didn’t want to leave and refused to have her daughter leave her.” Reza shrugged a shoulder and sighed. “Rafika wasn’t and never was my wife or girlfriend or anything, there was no sway I could have held over her decision to stay, really. And it wouldn’t be fair.”
“To make her leave her Hollow.”
Reza folded his arms across his chest and began to pace the floor, slowly, so he didn’t dizzy Rory trying to follow him with her eyes. “I didn’t have a choice about leaving my country. I’d applied for political asylum in the past. To the US, Australia, and New Zealand. Declined, of course. I’m a dual citizen of the EU and Tunisia because my mother is Austrian, but despite me not having contact with her from ages 15-18, then 19-nearly 33, my life wasn’t in ‘tangible and bona fide’ danger in both countries I was a citizen of. By the time my daughter was born, I gave up on trying to leave purposely.”
“But then there was a wedding, and a bomb anti magick people planted there, and I shielded Sabiha in time for it to be me who took a big injury instead of her entire little body being...she wouldn’t have survived. I barely did.” Truthfully, he’d wanted to die. It was by sheer willpower that he stayed awake, and told Sabiha to keep her eyes on his face so she wouldn’t think too much about how her dress was soaked in her father’s blood, and about how when she asked ‘Baba, does it hurt?’ he’d said ‘no’ because he was losing feeling as time passed.
He ran his fingers through his hair, ruffling it as he heaved a frustrated sigh. He hadn’t meant to give Rory this much tragic backstory. But to explain why he didn’t have Sabiha, he had to.
Reza reached for the bottle of boukha on the desk and took a big gulp. If he was going to finish this, he needed a drink. Or twenty.
“Right, so.” He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “My father made me go to Austria for medical care. In my...state at the time, I wasn’t really any good for defending myself. My identity as the anonymous activist writer Ares - have I told you about that?- had been exposed shortly before the wedding. I had to leave. It wasn’t a choice anymore.”
“My sisters came with me because my father insisted they enjoy the safety of Austria. Relative safety.” Reza laughed mirthlessly and took another swig from the bottle. “I wasn’t quite 33 when I left. My daughter was...mm, she was not yet five.”
Another swig of boukha. “With physical therapy and several surgeries, I was able to walk again and keep both legs. By the time it was time to consider going home, Lamia was ready for university and heard of Swynlake. I was left at an impasse, a Catch-22 of sorts.
“I could go home to Tunisia to my daughter, but live completely exposed where I’d likely not be able to find employment and a home to rent, or.” Another sip, for a dramatic pause. “I could follow my sisters here and live freely and able to make money to send to my daughter and her mother. That’s all I was ever good for, for Sabiha anyway. I don’t think she had any memories of me other than through her mother’s phone screen. Even when I was in Tunisia, I wasn’t with her much.”
See? Barely a father. He should have been by his daughter’s side way more than he was, but he wasn’t. There was no excuse.
Even if it was to provide for her.
“We lived mainly in the city of Hammamet, but I was a bit of a nomad. Out of necessity. I worked as a fisherman in whatever city had someone willing to pay me the most, and if that was Sousse, Djerba, Tunis, Zarsis, or Kelibia, that is where I went for a few weeks of work.” His pacing came to a stop as his bad knee began to hurt, and he came to rest atop his desk rather than the chair. “When I wasn’t on the boats, I made money as a handyman, and by designing web pages with my mainly self-taught coding skills. When I wasn’t working, I was writing essays and fliers supporting magick rights.”
Reza capped the bottle of liquor, not about to down the entire thing in front of Aurora, and pushed it to the opposite side of the desk. “If I couldn’t find good enough word fishing, I waited table or tended bars for the European, American, and Emirati tourists in whatever city had the best wages and earning outlook. And if that took me to Sidi Bou Said, Monastir, the Kerkennah Islands, or Mahdia, then that is where I went.”
“I wanted to be able to put my daughter through private school and math and language tutoring; my raw magic is the gift of tongues, so even without intense study, I learned - mm, it’s not important how many - languages perfectly fine. We don’t know what hers is yet; I want her to learn English and German, because those will take her far in this globalized world. But that takes money in my country.” He tapped his fingers against the table and swallowed. “So I spent most of the time I could have held her working to save up to give her things in a few years, that she was too young to even understand. And not I’m here, not even able to go back to hold her, because it would put her in danger.”
“Now...I’m not even good for money, if I returned to live in Tunisia. It’s better this way. This way, at least every pound I make translates to almost 3.70 Tunisian Dinar, and Rafika and my father can afford things like private school and tutoring, and extra after school activities, and nice vacations for Sabiha.” Reza swallowed hard, forcing his eyes to not water.
They weren’t allowed. He didn’t want Rory’s sympathy. Only for her to believe he didn’t just abandon his child.
“My daughter having a better life than I did is all I have ever wanted. And if all I can ever be for her is the reason that the money is available for that? Then that’s how it has to be. I sacrifice my happiness for hers and my father’s every day that I am here, but knowing she will have opportunities that I didn’t is…” Reza trailed off, and just.
Smiled.
“Enough.”
AURORA
Aurora had been Reza’s apprentice for almost three months now. She learned something new every day, and was growing as a person and a sorceress as he continued to teach her.
This was, without a doubt, the most important lesson Reza had ever given her. Or likely ever would.
Aurora lifted her head as she listened to Reza explain, her eyes following him around the room as he told her about his daughter, their brief time together, and the life he was trying to provide for her - even hundreds and hundreds of miles away. It made her heart ache, every word painting more of the picture of his life, and she…
Well, she didn’t know what she wanted to do.
Once he finished, tears stubbornly refusing to fall from his eyes, Aurora didn’t say a word. She simply swung her legs over the edge of the bed, moving slowly as she stood upright. Once she was sure she wasn’t about to collapse from vertigo, Aurora crossed the room to his desk; her bare feet padding against the floor softly. There was no hesitation as she brought herself between his knees, stepping as close to the desk as she could as she wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him tight. Her hands fisted loosely in the back of his shirt as she pressed her cheek against his chest, staring at his shoulder as a few tears of her own rolled down her cheeks.
(She wanted to tell him that he was so brave, willing to give his life for his daughter. She wanted to tell him that he was brilliant, working so hard to provide for her. She wanted to tell him that no matter how bad of a father he thought he was, he would never be a poorer parent than she was. She didn’t say any of that.)
“You’re a wonderful father, Reza,” Aurora said softly. “No matter what you think. None of those decisions you made were easy, but you made them for her. I don’t think there’s a more honest and selfless way to love someone. One day, you’ll be able to see her again and tell her in person.”
REZA
Reza tensed up when he was hugged. It wasn’t the first time she’d hugged him, but she had just woken up from one of those narcolepsy naps, where there’s the vertigo, and the fucked perception of reality, and he was worried she’d stumble over -
Oh, well she didn’t. And she seemed sturdy, but he wrapped an arm around her shoulders to return the hug just in case. He stopping hugging her back, but let his arm rest there.
“I am not entirely sure I ever will, but when she is older, maybe she will understand me like I learned to understand my mother.” In time, Sabiha would.
AURORA
“You will,” Aurora said, her grip tightening for a moment and her eyebrows furrowing together with determination. She’d fly Sabiha and her mother out to Swynlake herself to visit, if she had to. She hugged him for a moment longer before slowly letting go, taking a small step back and not looking away from his chest as she wiped her eyes dry. Aurora laughed sheepishly.
“Sorry, I… shouldn’t have hugged you like that,” she murmured, only meeting his eyes for a moment before glancing away. “Thank you, for telling me. For trusting me with all that.” When she met his eyes again, Aurora had a small, soft smile on her lips, even if there was still a pesky tear or two rolling down her cheeks.
REZA
“Right..no apology needed, but you’re not to ask me questions about any of that uninvited. I’ll talk about it when I want to and not a moment sooner or later,” Reza said, stern, but with a thin smile.
The warning was more of a warning to not expect him to want to talk about it on demand, than an absolute ban on the subject.
“Go home and rest, Aurora. We can work on collecting reagents tomorrow.”