love had been a C O M P L I C A T E D device in his life; all he’d ever known was the hard versions of. Love that wasn't real but clinging to something so DESPERATELY because that glimmer of believing that even a drop of happiness would do, was enough. It hurt in the long run — all the disappointment that came with it. The way that he’d still care or he’d find himself covered in all these invisible scars because what cut deeper than LOSS (what cut deeper than a father who you’d spend the rest of your life wishing, loved you back but it would never happen). He remembered this love because it had burnt a hole so big he was still trying to fill it; in the way she H A U N T E D his dreams or his nightmares. The way it was always either daddy dearest or HER. All the ways he regretted not loving her enough (or maybe more than she deserved).
It was more PAINFUL when those G H O S T S came waltzing back into your life as if you had never existed at all though he couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something was off — she was different. “ You don’t usually look like this in my head, ” completely opposite but with the same face: the same features. “ or maybe I’m hallucinating? seems possible — I haven’t slept much lately. ” He commented, more so talking to himself. Trying to decipher whatever it was that was happening. “ If this is my hallucination, why do you look different? ”
@ofdivinaticn
