#;do-gooder {batman}

[sicutxfur-a]

@imnotbrucewayne  ✗ from here ✗

This was a mistake.

He had an elaborate plan. A meal together. Champagne in front of the fire similar to the night they shared in the cabin before he eventually pulled out the ring at the stroke of midnight to propose.

Instead Two Face had chosen that exact time to start causing chaos in the city and so all of his plans had been torn to tatters. Still, Harvey had been stopped and there was a minute until midnight and so he had chosen now. The dingy alleyway was far from perfect but it would have to do.

“Selina…” He stated, taking the feline’s gloved hand in his own as he dropped to his knee. He reached into his belt until suddenly he realised that he didn’t have the ring. His eyes widened in horror, knowing that moving to his knee meant he set in motion something he couldn’t stop.

He shifted quickly and pulled out a pair of handcuffs. He snapped the cuff over his own wrist and then held the other end over Selina’s wrist. “Will you do the honour of becoming my wife?”

Selina was F R E E Z I N G her ass off. It was cold, she was somehow S W E A T I N G and goddamn Harvey Dent was ruining her Christmas. Well, really it was Bruce’s C H R I S T M A S since they had already celebrated H A N U K K A H for her. She stood, shuddering in her boots as the S N O W fell around their heads. 

The wailing of police sirens around them Y A N K E D Selina from a previous fantasy of a W I N T E R paradise--reminding her that they were still in Gotham. She was ready to head home and P E E L off her catsuit, slip into a H O T bath and drink the L A S T bottle of wine in her cabinet. As she turned her back, expecting him to follow, she heard him drop to his K N E E. 

Okay, what the H E L L was he doing?

She turned her head, lifting her goggles up to examine him fully in D I S B E L I E F. Holy S H I T. Her green hues widened in shock, mirroring his slight P A N I C whens he realized exactly what he was doing. “Bats...”

Somehow, getting P R O P O S E D to in a D A R K alley with a pair of handcuffs seemed like the O N L Y way she’d agree to get married. The corners of her lips slipped up in an amused smile, trying to hide the tears that G L O S S E D her eyes. Her fingers clicked the handcuff around her wrist.

“I would be absolutely H O N O R E D to marry you.”

[sicutxfur-a]

@delightfullydifferentobject ✗ from here ✗

Bruce was already out on patrol, getting a call as he was midway through putting an end to one of Riddlers latest games. “S this really isn’t the best…” He always referred to her as S if he was taking her call while he was on patrol, didn’t want to say her name aloud while working. The moment he heard the tone of her voice though his priorities immediately changed. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt? Has someone hurt you?” His questions were quick and it was clear his concern for her was great,so much so that he hadn’t even noticed how hard his grip around the throat of Riddler had become, knocking the question mark wearing freak out in an instant. “I’m on my way.” He replied before hanging up the call, tying up Riddler and his goons and he was off.

He rushed through the rooftops of Gotham city towards Selina’s apartment, dodging the satellite dishes, clothing lines, ventilation shafts and all the other litter atop the buildings. He moved with focus and purpose, the only thing that mattered was getting to Selina’s place. Soon enough he was there, climbing in through one of her windows, the window that led to her living room area. “Selina? Where are you?” He called out, the slight fear in his voice was evident. He found her in the bedroom and let out a sigh as he didn’t see any wounds, but saw the tears as clear as day. “Hey… What’s wrong?” He asked gently as he moved into the room, removing his mask as he did.  

It wasn’t apart of any P L A N of Selina’s. It would N E V E R even crossed her mind. At least not seriously. Sure, she had fantasized about having that kind of life with Bruce, but they were both so embedded in their lives in Gotham. It wasn’t S A F E to bring up children in that pit of C R I M E. She’d given up major thievery a while back, often staging small, low-scale heists just to get Bruce’s attention, after a fight. But for the most part, Selina stuck to assisting when she could, but ultimately settled on a J O B. She worked at the downtown gallery, curating--one of her D R E A M S. 

Babies were not a part of any dream that involved living in Gotham.

Selina shot up from her spot and launched herself at him, the sobs returning in greater S T R E N G T H. Wrapping her arms around him, she burrowed her face against his neck (well, what she could--that armor was T O U G H) and wept. “You’re going to H A T E me. I mean, I don’t care--but obviously I do. I mean--it’s my F A U L T. It has to be. I...I...I must’ve forgotten a pill or something or maybe this is just a C R U E L joke but holy shit we have a problem and I don’t know how to make it B E T T E R.” Tears fell freely from her cheeks, and she glanced over at the clock. F U C K. 7:59 quickly ticked to 8:00 and she dropped from her grasp on Bruce. With bare feet slapping the ground of her apartment, she thrust her head into the toilet in her bathroom and spewed chicken noodle soup and ginger-ale, sputtering and coughing the whole time.

[sicutxfur-a]

@delightfullydifferentobject ✗ from here ✗

[text: Selina] Wait what?! [text: Selina] Did you mean that?! [text: Selina] What?.. [text: Selina] Did you actually mean what you said? [text: Selina] You’re just messing with me aren’t you?..

[text: bruce] ok why would i be joking about that? [text: bruce] forget i said anything [text: bruce] you’re being an ass [text: bruce] besides i’m watching grey’s anatomy and i got all gooey and emotional

[sicutxfur-a]

“$”

text messages  ✗ Accepting ✗ @delightfullydifferentobject​

[[ an ACCIDENTAL text. ]]

[text: bruce] i think i love you

[text: bruce] shit ignore that

[text: bruce] i meant to send that to...my cat

[text: bruce] ...fuck you’re not buying this are you?

[text: bruce] ...shut up.

[sicutxfur-a]

@delightfullydifferentobject  ✗ from here ✗

Bruce was completely blacked out, this was the longest he’d slept in for a very very long time, but he slowly woke up, his head was absolutely throbbing though, what on earth had happened last night? All he remembered was finishing up his patrol for the night and then… Nothing. Everything from his sight to his hearing was absolutely shot right about now, he could only hear the vague sound of a woman’s voice next to him, a one night stand perhaps? At least this would only add to his billionaire playboy persona.

But when he felt a sharp kick to the back of his leg he frowned, turning to look at whoever this was, “hey! What was that fo-” and then he saw who it was, Selina Kyle, in his bed. Fuck. “Selina.. What did we do last night?” He groaned out as he rubbed a hand down his face, only to feel a small metal object on his finger, wait he’s never worn rings? He looked to his hand and on his ring finger he saw a wedding band and his eyes shot open. Then he looked to Selina and then back to the ring and then back to Selina. “…..no…we didn’t…we….no…”

Selina leaned back against the pillows, burrowing her face in her hands. She was M O R T I F I E D. She refused to believe that she had gotten so D R U N K that she had actually gotten married. Fuck me. She let out a growl and scrambled from the bed, searching for her clothes. “What the F U C K happened? How could you let me---why would you---” She was so F U R I O U S that she didn’t even know where to begin. Rationally, she knew that she couldn’t be M A D at him, it wasn’t entirely his fault. She had been just as D R U N K too.

“Why the fuck would you P R O P O S E to me when I was H A M M E R E D?” Bouncing in her jeans, she searched the floor for her bra or her shirt and came up empty, instead scooping up one of his shirts. Selina buttoned it slowly, trying to calm her breathing. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Bruce, she did--more than she cared to admit. But M A R R I A G E was an institution that she just didn’t believe in. She didn’t get the happy ending. She didn’t get a home with kids and an oven. Selina Kyle was a T H I E F--she didn’t get a happy ending.

“It’s fine, we can...we’ll just get it A N N U L L E D. Easy.” 

[sicutxfur-a]

I've been looking sad in all the N I C E S T places Give me something, oh, but you say nothing Now I'm in a cab, I tell 'em where your place is

What is happening to me?

batcowled | written by sam sicutxfur | written by caitlin

@batcowled || dual promo

[sicutxfur-a]

Ⓐ - batcowled

muse rate  ✗ Accepting ✗ @batcowled

Attractiveness:

repulsive || hideous || ugly || not attractive || unappealing || not unattractive || meh || no preference || ok || mildly attractive || nice looking || cute || adorable || attractive || pleasant on the eyes || good looking || hot || sexy || beautiful || gorgeous || hot damn || would tap that || perfect || godlike || holy fuck there are no words

Personality:

grating || irritating || frustrating || boring || confusing at best || awkward || unreasonable || psychotic || disturbing || interesting || engaging || affectionate || aggressive || ambitious || anxious || artistic || bad tempered (you can be such a fuckin’ grump bucket) || bossy || charismatic || appealing || unappealing || creative || courageous || dependable || unreliable || unpredictable || predictable || devious || dim || extroverted || introverted ||  egotistical || gregarious || fabulous || impulsive || intelligent || sympathetic || talkative || up beat || peaceful || calming || badass || flexible

How likely they would have sex with them:

not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending || fuck no! || never || no way || not likely || not sure || indifferent || I’m asexual || maybe || probably || it depends || fairly likely || likely || yeah sure || yes || would tap that || hell yes || fuck yes! || wishing that could happen right now || as many times as possible || we are already having sex

Level of Friendship:

never in a million years || worst of enemies || enemies || rivals || indifferent || neutral || acquaintance || friendly toward each other || casual friends || friends || good friends || best friends || fuck buddies || bosom buddies || practically the same person || would die for them || true friends || my only friend ||

First impression of them:

I hate them so much || I don’t like them || I don’t trust them || they annoy me || they’re weird || I’m indifferent || meh || they seem alright || they’re growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || I’m not sure if I trust them || I trust them || they’re cool || they’re genuine || I think we’re going to get along || I really like them || I think I’m in love || oh fuck they’re hot || I love them

Current impression of them:

I hate them so much || I don’t like them || I don’t trust them || they annoy me || they’re weird || I’m indifferent || meh || they seem alright || they’re growing on me || truce || I think I like them || I like them || I’m not sure if I trust them || I trust them || they’re cool || they’re genuine || I think we’re going to get along || I really like them || I think I’m in love || oh fuck they’re hot || I love them

How good of a kisser:

worst kisser ever || terrible || bad || awkward || just okay || alright || pretty good || good || makes me moan || excellent || exciting || oh god they’re good || I dream about it || fucking amazing || absolute perfection || we haven’t kissed