[Human AU. Boris, drunk, calls Thurston at night while he and Sonny was sleeping]
Thurston: What? Who is it?
Boris: This is Boriiiiis.
Thurston: WHAT. DO. YOU. WANT?
Boris: I always thought you were cute.
Thurston: I think I'd rather hear it from my own people than from you when you're drunk.
Boris: I want you to… I got a beer… I brought oxycontin… Come to my house…
Thurston: Let me interrupt you, because I'm not going to do all this. IT'S 3 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING!!!!!! I HAVE TO GO TO WORK EARLY IN THE MORNING AND GILBERT HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL!!!!!!!
Boris: Come on, Thurston. I thought we were friends.
Thurston: No offense, mate, but I hope you're buried alive.
Boris: Wait a minute… Some stupid jerk is looking at me…
Boris: Oh, wait, it's me, looking in the mirror.
Boris: Wait, I need to talk to the mirror, I'll call you back, Thurston.
Thurston: AM I THE ONLY SANE PERSON IN THIS CRAZY WORLD OF WEIRD PEOPLE?!?